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WEBVTT - https://subtitletools.com 00:01:03.463 --> 00:01:06.365 - The extraction point is room 201. 00:01:06.367 --> 00:01:08.634 - Destination? 00:01:08.636 --> 00:01:10.436 - Downtown. 00:01:10.438 --> 00:01:12.604 - Target description. 00:01:12.606 --> 00:01:15.240 - Room 201. 00:01:15.242 --> 00:01:17.843 - That's it? 00:01:17.845 --> 00:01:19.244 - You need an invitation? 00:02:01.911 --> 00:02:03.590 - Hello there, come on down 00:02:03.591 --> 00:02:07.693 to Lenny's auto sales and we'll sell you the car or truck... 00:02:07.695 --> 00:02:10.129 - are you serious? 11 00:02:10,131 --> 00:02:10,129 - What? 00:02:10.131 --> 00:02:12.498 - How are we gonna hear him next door 00:02:12.500 --> 00:02:14.533 if you have the TV on? 00:02:14.535 --> 00:02:16.702 You never think about things, do you? 00:02:16.704 --> 00:02:19.238 - I think about things. 00:02:19.240 --> 00:02:21.373 - Yeah? 00:02:21.375 --> 00:02:22.407 - Yeah. 00:02:22.409 --> 00:02:23.775 - Like what? 00:02:23.777 --> 00:02:25.177 - Like... 00:02:25.179 --> 00:02:27.479 - Hmm? 00:02:27.481 --> 00:02:29.214 - How do you know it's a him? 00:02:29.216 --> 00:02:30.282 - What? 00:02:30.284 --> 00:02:31.783 - Uh-huh. 00:02:31.785 --> 00:02:33.886 Yeah, how do you know it's a him? 00:02:33.888 --> 00:02:36.788 He said target was 201, 00:02:36.790 --> 00:02:39.825 how do you know it's a him, not a her? 00:02:48.234 --> 00:02:49.835 - Hey, it's... 00:02:49.837 --> 00:02:52.838 Yeah, of course, yeah, we're in room 202. 00:02:52.840 --> 00:02:55.874 Yeah, of course the TV is off. 00:02:55.876 --> 00:02:57.876 Yeah, everybody knows that. 00:02:57.878 --> 00:03:02.314 Listen, so, is the target, is it a man or a woman? 00:03:03.917 --> 00:03:05.884 Ah. Well, I mean, yeah, uh-huh. 00:03:05.886 --> 00:03:09.755 No, I know, I just didn't want to assume that... 00:03:09.757 --> 00:03:11.924 Yeah, you never specified, so... 00:03:11.926 --> 00:03:15.928 Uh-huh. Yeah. That's great. 00:03:15.930 --> 00:03:17.429 - What'd he say? 00:03:17.431 --> 00:03:19.898 - He hung up. 00:03:26.372 --> 00:03:28.874 - Is it him? 00:03:28.876 --> 00:03:32.444 - Yep. He's walking next door. 00:03:32.446 --> 00:03:35.581 - What'd he look like? 00:03:35.583 --> 00:03:36.848 - What do you mean what does he look like, 00:03:36.850 --> 00:03:39.318 he looks like a man. 00:03:39.320 --> 00:03:42.387 - Caucasian? African-American? 00:03:42.389 --> 00:03:46.558 Hispanic, Asian, what? 00:03:46.560 --> 00:03:47.859 - Does it matter? 00:03:47.861 --> 00:03:50.896 - It matters, I'm curious who I'm working with. 00:03:50.898 --> 00:03:54.900 - Who you're working...? 00:03:54.902 --> 00:03:58.937 He looks like a white guy. Ok? 00:03:58.939 --> 00:04:00.872 - Caucasian. 00:04:00.874 --> 00:04:02.608 - Yeah, and he looks like a Jew too, 00:04:02.610 --> 00:04:03.809 if you wanna get specific. 00:04:03.811 --> 00:04:07.346 - Whoa. It's Jewish. 00:04:07.348 --> 00:04:10.249 Jewish, ok, there's a difference. 00:04:10.251 --> 00:04:11.883 - Oh, gotcha. 00:04:11.885 --> 00:04:14.453 So when I put a bullet in this Shylock's forehead, 00:04:14.455 --> 00:04:16.855 I'll be sure to say Mazel Tov. 00:04:16.857 --> 00:04:19.358 - No, what? No, Mazel Tov is for weddings. 00:04:19.360 --> 00:04:20.859 No, listen, I'm just saying, 00:04:20.861 --> 00:04:24.363 you could be a little bit more considerate. 00:04:24.365 --> 00:04:26.265 - L'Chaim. 00:04:34.774 --> 00:04:36.808 - What about him looks Jewish? 00:04:36.810 --> 00:04:38.610 - I don't know, he looks like a Jew to me, 00:04:38.612 --> 00:04:39.978 what can I say? 00:04:39.980 --> 00:04:41.780 - Jewish. Jewish. 00:04:42.916 --> 00:04:44.483 - Hey, would you keep it down? 00:04:44.485 --> 00:04:46.351 I'm trying to have a conversation. 00:04:46.353 --> 00:04:48.720 Ok? 00:04:48.722 --> 00:04:50.422 Jew, Jewish, what is the difference? 00:04:50.424 --> 00:04:52.324 It's the same word with a three-letter difference, 00:04:52.326 --> 00:04:56.061 what is the big, it's not like I'm calling him a black. 00:04:56.063 --> 00:04:57.963 - Whoa! No, come on, man. 00:04:57.965 --> 00:04:59.464 - You know what? No, no, no. 00:04:59.466 --> 00:05:01.066 Don't do this to me, don't do this to me, ok? 00:05:01.068 --> 00:05:02.868 I voted for Obama, ok? 00:05:02.870 --> 00:05:03.969 I'm good with the blacks. 00:05:05.539 --> 00:05:06.872 What is so goddamn important? 00:05:06.874 --> 00:05:08.940 - You can't say the blacks. 00:05:08.942 --> 00:05:11.076 - Thank you. 00:05:11.078 --> 00:05:14.346 - Fine. The African-Americans. Ok? 00:05:14.348 --> 00:05:16.481 - No, that's not, you don't say it like that. 00:05:16.483 --> 00:05:17.683 - Like what? 82 00:05:17,685 --> 00:05:17,683 - You can say black people. 00:05:17.685 --> 00:05:21.553 In fact, what you should say is African-American people. 00:05:21.555 --> 00:05:22.788 - Amen. 00:05:22.790 --> 00:05:24.790 - But you can't say the black people 00:05:24.792 --> 00:05:26.758 or the African-American people. 00:05:26.760 --> 00:05:28.894 You know, that assumes an exclusivity 00:05:28.896 --> 00:05:30.962 that's sometimes a negative. 00:05:30.964 --> 00:05:32.798 - High-five. 00:05:32.800 --> 00:05:34.800 - It's the same with Jew and Jewish. 00:05:34.802 --> 00:05:38.503 Jew is a racial distinction, whereas Jewish is a religion. 00:05:38.505 --> 00:05:41.006 - So I can distinguish religion, just not race, 00:05:41.008 --> 00:05:42.107 this is what you're saying? 00:05:42.109 --> 00:05:43.008 - Right. 00:05:43.010 --> 00:05:45.944 - What he said. 00:05:45.946 --> 00:05:47.813 - Ok. Ok. That's great. 00:05:47.815 --> 00:05:49.815 So you're ok with it, you agree with him. 00:05:49.817 --> 00:05:52.050 - Yeah, I think we're on the same page. 00:05:52.052 --> 00:05:53.618 - Yeah. 00:05:53.620 --> 00:05:56.655 - So if I said that then man that we have to kill 00:05:56.657 --> 00:05:59.858 is a Jewish man, not a Jew, then you'd be ok with that? 00:05:59.860 --> 00:06:01.693 You'd be, you're good. 00:06:01.695 --> 00:06:03.395 - I'd be ok with that. 00:06:03.397 --> 00:06:05.630 - Yeah, I'm not Jewish. 00:06:05.632 --> 00:06:07.833 - Except he's not Jewish. 00:06:07.835 --> 00:06:10.836 See? 00:06:10.838 --> 00:06:12.838 - Well, don't worry about it, buddy, 00:06:12.840 --> 00:06:15.874 because we're gonna shoot your Jew ass anyway. 00:06:15.876 --> 00:06:18.377 We're equal opportunity like that. 00:06:18.379 --> 00:06:19.778 - It's Jewish! 00:06:19.780 --> 00:06:22.514 Are you? Again with the? I can't. 00:06:37.964 --> 00:06:40.599 - Ok, let me get this straight. 00:06:40.601 --> 00:06:42.167 You're Hispanic. 00:06:42.169 --> 00:06:43.568 - Yeah. 00:06:43.570 --> 00:06:44.803 - Can I call you a spic? 00:06:44.805 --> 00:06:47.472 - No. No, that's not at all what I was saying. 00:06:47.474 --> 00:06:49.107 You completely missed the point of what I was telling you. 00:06:49.109 --> 00:06:52.110 - I don't follow your logic at all. 00:06:52.112 --> 00:06:53.945 - This guy won't stop making fucking noise. 00:06:53.947 --> 00:06:57.082 - Hey. Come on. He's scared. 00:06:57.084 --> 00:07:00.018 Have you been in a trunk, it's dark. 00:07:00.020 --> 00:07:01.787 - We're gonna end his life in about two minutes 00:07:01.789 --> 00:07:03.155 and you're worried about if he's scared? 00:07:03.157 --> 00:07:04.823 What, do you want some pillows, you wanna put some 00:07:04.825 --> 00:07:06.958 pillows back there next time, give him a little back rub? 126 00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:06,958 - You know what? Be nice. 00:07:06.960 --> 00:07:09.928 - I'm not having this conversation with you right now, 00:07:09.930 --> 00:07:11.096 can we just do this? 00:07:19.839 --> 00:07:21.506 Get out. 00:07:21.508 --> 00:07:22.874 - You guys are what, what? 131 00:07:22,876 --> 00:07:22,874 We're gonna do this? 00:07:22.876 --> 00:07:26.578 - We aren't doing anything, we're gonna kill you. 00:07:26.580 --> 00:07:28.013 Get out. Let's go. 00:07:28.015 --> 00:07:30.949 - You need a hand. 00:07:45.465 --> 00:07:48.800 Wait. 00:07:48.802 --> 00:07:50.202 What did you mean by that? 00:07:50.204 --> 00:07:51.770 - By what? 00:07:51.772 --> 00:07:54.706 - Are we gonna kill him or aren't we? 00:07:54.708 --> 00:07:57.509 You used the same pronoun twice. 00:07:57.511 --> 00:08:01.813 - I meant that we, as in the three of us, 00:08:01.815 --> 00:08:03.782 aren't going to do anything, but we, 00:08:03.784 --> 00:08:07.552 as in you and I, are going to kill him. 00:08:07.554 --> 00:08:08.820 I thought that was clear. 00:08:08.822 --> 00:08:10.922 - Ok, fine. 00:08:10.924 --> 00:08:13.725 With the finger pointing, that made sense. 00:08:13.727 --> 00:08:16.228 I'm just saying, using the same pronoun 00:08:16.230 --> 00:08:19.631 in the same sentence twice is a bit confusing. 00:08:19.633 --> 00:08:21.733 Especially for my friend over here. 00:08:21.735 --> 00:08:23.001 - He's not your friend! 00:08:23.003 --> 00:08:24.736 - Are we doing this? 00:08:24.738 --> 00:08:26.071 We're doing this? Really? 00:08:26.073 --> 00:08:27.806 - Exactly. Thank you. 153 00:08:27,808 --> 00:08:27,806 - Well, you know what, to be fair, 00:08:27.808 --> 00:08:31.209 your friend was right, I was a bit confused. 00:08:31.211 --> 00:08:32.043 - See? 00:08:32.045 --> 00:08:32.978 - You were confused? 00:08:32.980 --> 00:08:34.212 - Yeah. 00:08:34.214 --> 00:08:36.014 - What's confusing about the situation? 00:08:36.016 --> 00:08:37.949 You were in the trunk of a car, we have guns, 00:08:37.951 --> 00:08:39.618 now we're on these railroad tracks, 00:08:39.620 --> 00:08:41.019 what do you think is gonna happen here, a picnic? 00:08:41.021 --> 00:08:43.255 - I'm not talking about inferences. 00:08:43.257 --> 00:08:44.890 - Inferences? 00:08:44.892 --> 00:08:46.858 - Yeah, I mean, I can infer from those circumstances 00:08:46.860 --> 00:08:48.827 what will happen, but I can't determine 00:08:48.829 --> 00:08:51.963 from your double pronoun usage what is going to happen. 00:08:51.965 --> 00:08:53.164 - Jesus Christ, just get down on the ground, 00:08:53.166 --> 00:08:54.933 get down on the ground right now. 00:08:54.935 --> 00:08:58.537 - He's right. Ok? You gotta be clear. 00:08:58.539 --> 00:09:00.672 - Jesus Christ, next thing you're gonna start talking 00:09:00.674 --> 00:09:01.973 about the black and the Jews again. 172 00:09:01,975 --> 00:09:01,973 - God! 00:09:01.975 --> 00:09:04.876 - Black and Jews! Blacks and Jews! 00:09:04.878 --> 00:09:06.545 - You can't say that. 00:09:06.547 --> 00:09:09.214 - Listen, don't you tell me how to say what I wanna say, ok? 00:09:09.216 --> 00:09:10.949 If I wanna say blacks and Jews, I will say 00:09:10.951 --> 00:09:13.785 the blacks and the Jews. Shit. 00:09:19.825 --> 00:09:21.026 Whoo. 00:09:26.032 --> 00:09:27.899 - Well, that's done. 00:09:27.901 --> 00:09:29.801 - Fuck it. 00:09:29.803 --> 00:09:31.803 I'm texting the boss. 00:09:46.085 --> 00:09:48.119 Shit. 00:09:48.121 --> 00:09:50.589 - What? What did the boss say? 00:09:50.591 --> 00:09:53.124 - We got the wrong guy. 00:09:53.126 --> 00:09:54.192 - What? 00:09:54.194 --> 00:09:57.829 - He says he's oriental. 00:09:57.831 --> 00:10:01.299 Oh, for fuck's sake. 00:10:40.373 --> 00:10:43.875 - 30 seconds to air, 30 seconds to air. 00:10:43.877 --> 00:10:45.877 - Is that marijuana? 00:10:45.879 --> 00:10:47.812 - Can I get another lighter? 00:10:47.814 --> 00:10:49.914 Thank you very much. 00:10:49.916 --> 00:10:51.249 Is what? 00:10:53.086 --> 00:10:54.853 Relax. It's legal almost everywhere. 00:10:54.855 --> 00:10:56.821 - You can't do the news high. 00:10:56.823 --> 00:10:58.990 - Why? You don't ever do the news drunk? 00:10:58.992 --> 00:11:00.358 - Ok. 00:11:00.360 --> 00:11:01.826 - You don't do the new drunk either? 00:11:01.828 --> 00:11:02.961 - No. 199 00:11:02,963 --> 00:11:02,961 - You are a square. 00:11:02.963 --> 00:11:06.965 Next thing you're gonna say, you also never drive drunk. 00:11:06.967 --> 00:11:08.099 - No. 00:11:08.101 --> 00:11:10.935 - This girl is rich. 00:11:10.937 --> 00:11:12.837 I knew it, I knew when I met you 00:11:12.839 --> 00:11:15.674 that you were not gonna be easy to get along with. 00:11:15.676 --> 00:11:18.176 We got an eternity, we have seven seconds. 00:11:18.178 --> 00:11:21.346 I could hit twice more, watch. 00:11:21.348 --> 00:11:24.849 Do your warm-ups, whatever you do. 00:11:24.851 --> 00:11:28.987 - In five, four, three, 00:11:28.989 --> 00:11:32.057 two, one. 00:11:33.025 --> 00:11:35.160 - Good evening. 00:11:35.162 --> 00:11:36.795 I'm rob Richards. 00:11:36.797 --> 00:11:38.329 - And I'm Sarah Saunders. 00:11:38.331 --> 00:11:42.033 Tonight's breaking news, a prostitute named Britney Cummings 00:11:42.035 --> 00:11:46.771 alleges that mayor Carmichael paid her for sex. 00:11:46.773 --> 00:11:48.940 - This comes at an especially troubling time for the mayor, 00:11:48.942 --> 00:11:51.176 considering, of course, he's running for re-election 00:11:51.178 --> 00:11:52.877 in the fall. 00:11:52.879 --> 00:11:54.913 - Tonight we bring you face to face with Britney 00:11:54.915 --> 00:11:58.049 in an exclusive one to one interview. 00:11:58.051 --> 00:12:00.151 - In our face to face segment. One on one. 00:12:06.092 --> 00:12:07.859 We're gonna cut the interview up so you don't need to worry. 00:12:07.861 --> 00:12:08.993 - Oh, ok. 00:12:08.995 --> 00:12:10.395 It's not all gonna be on there. 00:12:10.397 --> 00:12:11.863 We could even make out right now, 00:12:11.865 --> 00:12:13.298 we wouldn't use it, I would just send you... 00:12:13.300 --> 00:12:15.233 - we wouldn't need to, but I get where you're going. 00:12:15.235 --> 00:12:16.901 We wouldn't have to. 00:12:16.903 --> 00:12:19.904 - Everything's optional in life, you know? Free country. 00:12:19.906 --> 00:12:21.506 Ever since Harriet Tubman did good works 00:12:21.508 --> 00:12:24.008 for our black brothers and sisters. 231 00:12:24,010 --> 00:12:24,008 - Freedom of speech. 00:12:24.010 --> 00:12:27.879 - Absolutely. Man, I wanna fuck you so bad. 00:12:27.881 --> 00:12:28.913 - Ok. 00:12:28.915 --> 00:12:31.015 - Cocaine? Oh, we're recording? 00:12:31.017 --> 00:12:32.517 Absolutely. 00:12:32.519 --> 00:12:34.419 Britney, I'd like to thank you for being here on the show. 00:12:34.421 --> 00:12:35.954 - Thank you for having me. 00:12:35.956 --> 00:12:39.524 - Britney, sex with mayor Carmichael, 00:12:39.526 --> 00:12:41.526 tell me about it. 00:12:41.528 --> 00:12:43.061 - Before we get into that, 00:12:43.063 --> 00:12:45.363 I just wanna let all my fans know 00:12:45.365 --> 00:12:48.767 that they can follow me on Twitter, @britneyspolitics, 00:12:48.769 --> 00:12:51.035 where we will be discussing my thoughts 00:12:51.037 --> 00:12:53.238 on politics and such. 00:12:53.240 --> 00:12:55.073 - Why come forward now, Britney? 00:12:55.075 --> 00:12:58.243 - Because I'm in a privileged position. 00:12:58.245 --> 00:13:01.312 You know, I have all the necessary information. 00:13:01.314 --> 00:13:04.015 I'll be telling all of those details on my blog. 00:13:04.017 --> 00:13:05.350 - I mean, you've been busy. 00:13:05.352 --> 00:13:06.985 - I have been very busy, yeah, 00:13:06.987 --> 00:13:09.053 I am in the talks for a reality show, 00:13:09.055 --> 00:13:11.890 and I have a tell all mem-wire 00:13:11.892 --> 00:13:14.993 that is coming to the book stores at the end of the month. 00:13:14.995 --> 00:13:17.061 - When did you start having sex with him? 00:13:17.063 --> 00:13:20.098 - Well, I'll be tweeting all those details to all my fans. 00:13:20.100 --> 00:13:22.500 - Bet all your fans would love to hear those details now. 00:13:22.502 --> 00:13:24.269 - Ok, follow me on Twitter, Robert. 00:13:25.939 --> 00:13:28.940 I'll tell you one thing, I know his favorite food. 00:13:28.942 --> 00:13:29.941 - I'm sorry? 00:13:29.943 --> 00:13:31.509 - It's pickles. 00:13:31.511 --> 00:13:33.077 His favorite food. 00:13:33.079 --> 00:13:34.879 - His favorite food is pickles. 263 00:13:34,881 --> 00:13:34,879 - Yup. 00:13:34.881 --> 00:13:38.950 - Well, that's a hot, breaking news item 265 00:13:38,952 --> 00:13:38,950 we've got right there. 00:13:38.952 --> 00:13:42.854 Britney, have you seen the mayor more than once? 00:13:42.856 --> 00:13:45.490 - I see him all the time. 00:13:45.492 --> 00:13:46.858 - You see him all the time? 00:13:46.860 --> 00:13:50.128 - He's on TV. 00:13:50.130 --> 00:13:53.498 - Ok, that's clearly not what I meant with that question. 00:13:53.500 --> 00:13:55.900 Well, I'd like to thank you for being here, Britney. 00:13:55.902 --> 00:13:57.068 You've been a great guest. 00:13:57.070 --> 00:13:58.870 - Thank you. Hashtag Britney's politics. 00:13:58.872 --> 00:14:00.538 - Yeah, you should hashtag with that 00:14:00.540 --> 00:14:02.907 because she's really great. 00:14:02.909 --> 00:14:04.075 She's really great. 00:14:09.882 --> 00:14:10.615 - Let's do that again. 00:14:10.617 --> 00:14:13.017 - Ok. 00:14:13.019 --> 00:14:13.852 - Are you ready? 00:14:13.854 --> 00:14:15.086 - Yes. 00:14:15.088 --> 00:14:16.321 - Positive energy. 00:14:16.323 --> 00:14:17.255 - Yeah, but don't seem too eager. 00:14:17.257 --> 00:14:18.623 - But not too complacent. 00:14:18.625 --> 00:14:21.492 - Right. 00:14:21.494 --> 00:14:23.361 - Hi, I'm Anna Smith. 00:14:23.363 --> 00:14:25.029 - And I'm Dave Smith. 00:14:25.031 --> 00:14:27.365 - And we are so excited about this opportunity 00:14:27.367 --> 00:14:28.633 to adopt a child. 00:14:28.635 --> 00:14:31.169 - It has been a dream of ours to have a family 00:14:31.171 --> 00:14:35.139 and have children. 00:14:35.141 --> 00:14:36.875 Weren't you supposed to say something next? 00:14:36.877 --> 00:14:38.276 - No, you were supposed to say why we want children. 00:14:38.278 --> 00:14:39.878 - I thought that you were going to explain 294 00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:39,878 why we would make good parents. 00:14:39.880 --> 00:14:43.014 - All right, you know what, fuck it, let's just start over, 00:14:43.016 --> 00:14:43.948 check the script, ok? 00:14:43.950 --> 00:14:44.950 - Good idea. 00:14:54.560 --> 00:14:55.994 When is she coming? 00:14:55.996 --> 00:15:00.498 - I think 1:30. Let me see what you're wearing. 00:15:00.500 --> 00:15:02.901 Nice. Gun-toting republican. 00:15:07.006 --> 00:15:10.141 Ah. Silicon valley, eats quinoa, drives a hybrid, 00:15:10.143 --> 00:15:12.644 masculinity of a koala bear. 00:15:17.216 --> 00:15:20.618 Rock star dad. Liberal. 00:15:20.620 --> 00:15:23.988 Definitely well-hung. 00:15:23.990 --> 00:15:26.491 - Oh. Very slutty. 00:15:26.493 --> 00:15:29.193 Willing to suck the aluminum off a doorknob. 00:15:29.195 --> 00:15:33.531 Great if she's a lesbian. 00:15:33.533 --> 00:15:35.566 Hippy. Unshaved armpits. 00:15:35.568 --> 00:15:38.469 You definitely meditate and practice yoga. 00:15:43.509 --> 00:15:45.710 Practical. Uptight. 00:15:45.712 --> 00:15:49.347 Has secret rape fantasies while shopping for clogs. 00:15:49.349 --> 00:15:53.284 - Good. I think we have all of our bases covered. 00:15:59.591 --> 00:16:02.026 - Hipster. 00:16:02.028 --> 00:16:03.361 - Damn. 00:16:03.363 --> 00:16:05.096 - Really, what is that? 00:16:05.098 --> 00:16:07.265 If she puts on a pair of ironically-colored sunglasses, 00:16:07.267 --> 00:16:09.200 I'm gonna break her fucking legs. 00:16:09.202 --> 00:16:12.103 - Fuck it. We'll play it safe. 00:16:18.444 --> 00:16:20.211 - Welcome. 00:16:20.213 --> 00:16:21.579 - Come on in. 00:16:21.581 --> 00:16:23.114 - Thank you. 00:16:39.598 --> 00:16:41.232 - Can we get you anything to drink? 00:16:41.234 --> 00:16:43.034 Some white wine, perhaps? 00:16:43.036 --> 00:16:46.070 - I don't usually drink this early in the day. 00:16:46.072 --> 00:16:50.141 - Oh, neither do we. Dave's a comedian. 00:16:50.143 --> 00:16:51.743 - Always telling jokes. 00:16:56.015 --> 00:16:57.782 Honey, can you help me in the kitchen? 00:16:57.784 --> 00:16:59.684 - Sure. 00:16:59.686 --> 00:17:02.153 We made some tasty treats. 00:17:09.070 --> 00:17:10.029 - What the fuck? 00:17:10.030 --> 00:17:13.798 - Well, she's not Asian, so definitely not the pot stickers. 00:17:13.800 --> 00:17:16.134 Would you like something to eat? 00:17:16.136 --> 00:17:18.069 - Where are you from? 00:17:18.071 --> 00:17:20.705 - Brooklyn. 00:17:20.707 --> 00:17:21.773 - Bagels? 00:17:21.775 --> 00:17:22.807 - Wait for it. 00:17:22.809 --> 00:17:25.109 But where are you from from? 00:17:25.111 --> 00:17:28.346 My parents are German and English, Anna's are French. 00:17:28.348 --> 00:17:29.547 - Um... 00:17:31.583 --> 00:17:33.251 My father's from Israel 00:17:33.253 --> 00:17:36.687 and my mother is from Atlanta. 00:17:36.689 --> 00:17:37.789 Question. 00:17:37.791 --> 00:17:39.791 - Jewish? 00:17:39.793 --> 00:17:41.793 - Black? 00:17:41.795 --> 00:17:44.495 - Blewish? 00:17:44.497 --> 00:17:46.230 Here we go. 00:17:46.232 --> 00:17:50.168 Some options I'm sure you'll like. 00:17:50.170 --> 00:17:52.170 - Oh, bagels and lox are my favorite, 00:17:52.172 --> 00:17:53.805 can I make you a plate? 00:17:53.807 --> 00:17:57.308 - I'm fine. Now to some questions. 00:17:57.310 --> 00:17:58.776 - We insist. 00:18:02.214 --> 00:18:03.848 - I'm a vegan. 00:18:03.850 --> 00:18:05.850 - That's ok. 00:18:05.852 --> 00:18:07.151 - I know. 00:18:07.153 --> 00:18:08.119 First question... 00:18:08.121 --> 00:18:10.788 - yes. That's why we're here. 00:18:10.790 --> 00:18:14.692 - Yes. Why do you want to adopt a child? 00:18:14.694 --> 00:18:17.528 - Oh, well, we have talked about having children 00:18:17.530 --> 00:18:20.631 and starting a family for a very long time. 00:18:20.633 --> 00:18:23.534 Heaven knows we've tried, but the good lord 00:18:23.536 --> 00:18:26.404 just hasn't blessed us with a child yet. 00:18:26.406 --> 00:18:27.805 - So you are religious? 00:18:27.807 --> 00:18:31.109 - Yes. - - No. 00:18:31.111 --> 00:18:34.278 - We're spiritual. 00:18:34.280 --> 00:18:36.881 - Don't say spiritual, you sound like a fucking loser, 00:18:36.883 --> 00:18:39.817 it's a gay word. 00:18:39.819 --> 00:18:42.887 - Do you plan on raising your child in the church? 00:18:42.889 --> 00:18:45.756 - We are open to any and all faiths. 00:18:45.758 --> 00:18:47.625 - Even a Muslim. 00:18:51.263 --> 00:18:52.763 - What would you say the most important part 00:18:52.765 --> 00:18:54.465 of being a parent is? 00:18:54.467 --> 00:18:56.267 - Unconditional love. 00:18:56.269 --> 00:18:58.269 Even for a special needs child. 00:18:58.271 --> 00:18:59.537 - Oh, god. 00:18:59.539 --> 00:19:00.872 - Not that we want a special needs child. 00:19:00.874 --> 00:19:04.308 Not that every child doesn't deserve a home, 00:19:04.310 --> 00:19:06.577 we just aren't specifically applying to get 00:19:06.579 --> 00:19:08.479 a special needs child. 00:19:13.852 --> 00:19:15.753 - What she's trying to say 00:19:15.755 --> 00:19:20.258 is that education is really important to us. 00:19:20.260 --> 00:19:23.327 We're both educated, we both went to Ivy league schools. 00:19:23.329 --> 00:19:24.662 - Well, you went to Amherst. 00:19:24.664 --> 00:19:25.763 - It's a little Ivy. 00:19:25.765 --> 00:19:27.932 - It's not one of the real ivies. 00:19:27.934 --> 00:19:30.801 - Anyway, we've already been checking out 00:19:30.803 --> 00:19:32.703 the top preschools in the area. 00:19:32.705 --> 00:19:33.804 - Private school then. 00:19:33.806 --> 00:19:36.607 - Of course. 00:19:39.178 --> 00:19:41.345 - Or not. 00:19:41.347 --> 00:19:42.713 Public schools in this area 00:19:42.715 --> 00:19:44.749 have really attractive qualities as well, 00:19:44.751 --> 00:19:47.185 they're almost like private schools. 00:19:47.187 --> 00:19:48.920 With the right people. 00:19:48.922 --> 00:19:53.791 - We want our child to have the best education possible. 00:19:53.793 --> 00:19:55.760 It is so hard to make it in this world 00:19:55.762 --> 00:19:59.764 with a subpar education. 00:19:59.766 --> 00:20:01.899 - I went to public school. 00:20:01.901 --> 00:20:05.403 And I am a social worker. 00:20:05.405 --> 00:20:06.938 - Right. 00:20:06.940 --> 00:20:09.807 And that worked out fine for you. 00:20:09.809 --> 00:20:11.475 - Just fine. 00:20:17.816 --> 00:20:20.551 - We want our child to have diversity. 00:20:20.553 --> 00:20:22.420 We would love our child to go to school 00:20:22.422 --> 00:20:25.356 with people like you, people like your children. 00:20:25.358 --> 00:20:27.225 - I don't have any children. 00:20:27.227 --> 00:20:29.660 - Oh, well, you'll meet the right man one day. 00:20:29.662 --> 00:20:32.863 - My wife and I have decided not to have kids. 00:20:35.400 --> 00:20:37.001 Great. 00:20:37.003 --> 00:20:40.605 Would you mind if I used your restroom? 00:20:40.607 --> 00:20:44.742 - Sure. Down the hall, second door to the left. 00:21:04.830 --> 00:21:07.732 - The smiths are articulate, educated, 00:21:07.734 --> 00:21:11.502 financially stable, intelligent individuals. 00:21:11.504 --> 00:21:15.673 However, the atmosphere is unquestionably judgmental. 00:21:15.675 --> 00:21:17.975 I feel as though they are plotting their answers 00:21:17.977 --> 00:21:20.711 and are rehearsed, cold, 00:21:20.713 --> 00:21:24.849 calculating, not nurturing, possibly racist, 00:21:24.851 --> 00:21:27.285 definitely elitist. 00:21:30.856 --> 00:21:32.957 May I have my notes, please. 00:21:36.328 --> 00:21:37.995 I think it's time for me to leave. 00:21:37.997 --> 00:21:40.865 - We don't think that you have a good impression of us. 00:21:40.867 --> 00:21:43.934 - We need more time together to explain our positions. 00:21:43.936 --> 00:21:47.672 - Quite clear. Thank you. 00:21:47.674 --> 00:21:48.673 - Wait a second. 00:21:48.675 --> 00:21:49.907 - Excuse me. 00:21:49.909 --> 00:21:51.909 - We are not trying to trap you, ok, 00:21:51.911 --> 00:21:53.644 we are just trying to explain ourselves. 427 00:21:53,646 --> 00:21:53,644 We are good people. 00:21:53.646 --> 00:21:57.581 - I'm sorry, this is getting very, very uncomfortable. 00:21:57.583 --> 00:21:59.383 - We just wanna mold a child in our own vision. 00:21:59.385 --> 00:22:00.584 - Please step away. 00:22:00.586 --> 00:22:01.819 - I know we come off as eager. 432 00:22:01,821 --> 00:22:01,819 - Motivated, really. 00:22:01.821 --> 00:22:04.855 - Would you please just let me leave? 00:22:30.482 --> 00:22:31.649 Oh, my god! 00:22:31.651 --> 00:22:33.818 - Hey, you. Let's start over. 00:22:33.820 --> 00:22:36.387 - Fresh start. 00:22:36.389 --> 00:22:38.756 - Oh, my god. 00:22:38.758 --> 00:22:40.958 You're both horrible people. 00:22:40.960 --> 00:22:44.128 - We are not horrible people. 00:22:44.130 --> 00:22:46.764 - Definitely not horrible people. 00:22:46.766 --> 00:22:49.700 - We are loving people. 00:22:49.702 --> 00:22:51.869 - You're both fucking crazy. 00:22:51.871 --> 00:22:53.070 - Dedicated. 00:22:53.072 --> 00:22:54.372 - Delusional! 00:22:54.374 --> 00:22:55.773 - Forward-thinking. 00:22:55.775 --> 00:22:58.642 - Horrible! Horrible people. 00:22:58.644 --> 00:23:01.846 A child would implode under these circumstances, 00:23:01.848 --> 00:23:04.782 and there is no way that I will ever, 00:23:04.784 --> 00:23:07.485 as long as I live, give you a child. 00:23:07.487 --> 00:23:09.920 This is not a nurturing environment. 00:23:09.922 --> 00:23:13.657 - This is a nurturing environment! 00:23:17.497 --> 00:23:19.697 I think what would make our home special 00:23:19.699 --> 00:23:21.932 is we're really good listeners. 00:23:21.934 --> 00:23:24.101 I think we would do our best to listen 00:23:24.103 --> 00:23:26.737 to our child's opinions. 00:23:26.739 --> 00:23:28.172 - Even if we didn't agree with them. 00:23:39.419 --> 00:23:41.585 - Hi there. 00:23:41.587 --> 00:23:44.088 I think we got off on the wrong foot. 00:23:44.090 --> 00:23:47.024 - We just really wanna start a family, 00:23:47.026 --> 00:23:50.194 so we might've come off a little overeager. 00:23:50.196 --> 00:23:51.962 - I think we were too eager, hon. 00:23:51.964 --> 00:23:53.664 - Whoops. 00:23:53.666 --> 00:23:56.534 - So, I think what we can do is slightly alter 00:23:56.536 --> 00:23:58.569 your letter of recommendation here. 00:23:58.571 --> 00:24:02.540 - We just just tweaked it a little bit for you, 00:24:02.542 --> 00:24:06.577 and we painted ourselves in a more accurate portrait. 00:24:06.579 --> 00:24:08.813 - You see there? Motivated. 00:24:08.815 --> 00:24:11.882 Team spirit. Go-getters. Excited. 00:24:11.884 --> 00:24:15.820 - Those are the words that more accurately describe us. 00:24:15.822 --> 00:24:18.556 - So, we are gonna pop this letter of review 00:24:18.558 --> 00:24:19.790 in your little envelope there 00:24:19.792 --> 00:24:21.559 and then we are gonna drop it in the mail 00:24:21.561 --> 00:24:23.727 and then we are all good. 00:24:23.729 --> 00:24:26.997 - Thank you so much for all your help with this. 00:24:41.746 --> 00:24:43.481 - Hi there, sweetie. 00:24:43.483 --> 00:24:47.051 - She's just so perfect. She's just so cute. 00:24:47.053 --> 00:24:49.053 - I have the photographer coming at three 00:24:49.055 --> 00:24:51.822 to take pictures for the pre-preschool application. 00:24:51.824 --> 00:24:54.058 She's gonna be the best student. 00:24:54.060 --> 00:24:56.894 - We did it. We really did it. 481 00:24:56,896 --> 00:24:56,894 - We deserve this. 00:24:56.896 --> 00:24:59.930 - She's gonna be just like us. 00:24:59.932 --> 00:25:02.199 - Exactly like us. 00:25:02.201 --> 00:25:04.802 She's gonna be perfect. 00:25:04.804 --> 00:25:06.971 Where are you going, you're not going anywhere. 00:25:06.973 --> 00:25:11.275 We're gonna have you forever and ever and ever. 00:25:19.285 --> 00:25:20.751 - Good morning. 00:25:20.753 --> 00:25:22.853 How ya doing, Charlie, good to see ya. 00:25:22.855 --> 00:25:26.657 Thank you all for coming out. 00:25:26.659 --> 00:25:30.094 I would like to address the ridiculous allegations 00:25:30.096 --> 00:25:33.831 made against me. 00:25:33.833 --> 00:25:36.967 I want the voters to know that I am a victim 00:25:36.969 --> 00:25:40.771 of a woman who desires fame. 00:25:40.773 --> 00:25:45.175 A victim of a news media that sensationalizes 00:25:45.177 --> 00:25:49.079 any and all allegations. 00:25:49.081 --> 00:25:53.017 With god's help, and prayer, 00:25:53.019 --> 00:25:57.087 my family and I will be able to get through this. 00:25:57.089 --> 00:25:58.923 Thank you. 00:26:08.133 --> 00:26:10.801 - Tonight we're joined by a special guest, 00:26:10.803 --> 00:26:12.736 mayor Jimmy Carmichael, 00:26:12.738 --> 00:26:14.605 who's here to respond to the allegations 00:26:14.607 --> 00:26:18.075 recently placed against him by a known sex worker. 00:26:18.077 --> 00:26:20.711 Mayor Carmichael, good evening, 00:26:20.713 --> 00:26:21.912 thank you for being here. 00:26:21.914 --> 00:26:23.914 - Thank you for having me. 00:26:23.916 --> 00:26:27.885 - Let's just jump right in. Britney Cummings. 00:26:27.887 --> 00:26:30.988 Any truth to the allegations? 00:26:30.990 --> 00:26:32.790 - None. 00:26:32.792 --> 00:26:34.959 - Have you ever met her? 00:26:34.961 --> 00:26:38.862 - I am the victim of a witch hunt, 00:26:38.864 --> 00:26:41.799 a woman hellbent on fame, 00:26:41.801 --> 00:26:44.768 and a media circus just hungry for gossip. 513 00:26:44,770 --> 00:26:44,768 - Mayor Carmichael... 00:26:44.770 --> 00:26:48.939 - in today's society, a man's career is ruined 00:26:48.941 --> 00:26:51.875 as soon as he is accused of rape. 00:26:51.877 --> 00:26:53.811 - Shouldn't a man's career be ruined 00:26:53.813 --> 00:26:55.212 if he rapes a woman? 00:26:55.214 --> 00:26:56.981 - Well, that's just it. 00:26:56.983 --> 00:26:59.316 Many times, if not most, 00:26:59.318 --> 00:27:02.353 the man is innocent. 00:27:02.355 --> 00:27:05.956 A rape-sex fantasy game gone wrong. 00:27:05.958 --> 00:27:07.157 - What? 00:27:07.159 --> 00:27:09.159 - Maybe they called out the wrong safe word. 00:27:09.161 --> 00:27:13.964 People read headlines, never the entire story. 00:27:13.966 --> 00:27:18.102 Many times, the man is the victim. 00:27:18.104 --> 00:27:21.071 He's the one being raped. 00:27:21.073 --> 00:27:23.807 - Many victims of rape lack the physical evidence 00:27:23.809 --> 00:27:25.843 required to garner a conviction. 00:27:25.845 --> 00:27:28.946 - Sarah, I'm sure you'll agree, if a woman 00:27:28.948 --> 00:27:33.183 doesn't have proof, she should not make accusations. 00:27:33.185 --> 00:27:36.320 - Mr. mayor, I think we've gotten a little off topic. 00:27:36.322 --> 00:27:38.389 Britney Cummings. 00:27:38.391 --> 00:27:40.791 - I've never met her. 00:27:40.793 --> 00:27:42.326 - Her story. 00:27:42.328 --> 00:27:44.862 - Complete fabrication. 00:27:47.932 --> 00:27:50.934 - Well, there you have it, straight from the horse's mouth. 00:27:50.936 --> 00:27:55.339 Mayor Jimmy Carmichael has never met Britney Cummings. 00:29:20.158 --> 00:29:21.525 - So, how's work? 00:29:21.527 --> 00:29:22.893 - Work's good. 00:29:22.895 --> 00:29:23.861 - That's good. 00:29:23.863 --> 00:29:24.762 - Yeah, it's good. 00:29:24.764 --> 00:29:26.029 - Good to hear. 00:29:37.809 --> 00:29:41.979 - That's the most action that you've gotten in a while. 00:29:41.981 --> 00:29:43.046 It's been how long? 00:29:43.048 --> 00:29:44.114 - It's been a month. 00:29:44.116 --> 00:29:45.415 - A month? 00:29:45.417 --> 00:29:47.151 It's been longer than that. 00:29:47.153 --> 00:29:50.254 For sure. For sure. 00:29:50.256 --> 00:29:52.856 It's been like a fucking, are you a virgin? 00:29:52.858 --> 00:29:54.057 I feel sorry for you. 00:29:54.059 --> 00:29:55.893 - Right, 'cause you're such a slut. 00:29:55.895 --> 00:29:57.227 You're so slutty. 00:29:57.229 --> 00:29:58.996 Your slut vibe actually deflowers me 554 00:29:58,998 --> 00:29:58,996 by sitting on this couch. 555 00:29:58,998 --> 00:29:58,996 - Say it like it's a fucking bad thing. 00:29:58.998 --> 00:30:03.133 - It's like the sex just like comes off of you 00:30:03.135 --> 00:30:04.935 and you're just like, 00:30:04.937 --> 00:30:07.971 like I'm getting like fucked by your sex vibes. 00:30:12.944 --> 00:30:15.012 - So, how are the ladies treating you? 00:30:15.014 --> 00:30:16.346 - Treating me fine. 00:30:16.348 --> 00:30:17.948 - That's good. 562 00:30:17,950 --> 00:30:17,948 - Yeah. 00:30:17.950 --> 00:30:20.818 - When was your last? 00:30:20.820 --> 00:30:21.820 - Ooh. 00:30:22.988 --> 00:30:24.822 That has been a while. 00:30:24.824 --> 00:30:26.924 - You should try online dating. 00:30:26.926 --> 00:30:29.960 - Are you serious? 00:30:29.962 --> 00:30:33.597 - Seriously serious. I get a date or two a week. 00:30:33.599 --> 00:30:35.098 - That's serious. 00:30:38.303 --> 00:30:40.270 - Try it. 00:30:40.272 --> 00:30:43.507 - No, I'm never going to do online dating, 00:30:43.509 --> 00:30:46.944 it's the stupidest thing I've ever heard of. 00:30:46.946 --> 00:30:50.981 - Why don't you try online dating? 00:30:50.983 --> 00:30:52.416 - 'Cause that's like what losers do. 00:30:52.418 --> 00:30:53.383 - What? 00:30:53.385 --> 00:30:54.618 - I am not doing online dating. 00:30:54.620 --> 00:30:56.019 - You need it. 00:30:56.021 --> 00:30:57.487 - No. Uh-uh. 00:30:57.489 --> 00:30:59.389 Why am I gonna put myself out there like that 00:30:59.391 --> 00:31:01.525 and be like, hey, come date me. 00:31:01.527 --> 00:31:04.161 - It takes the work out 00:31:04.163 --> 00:31:06.964 so that it can work it out. 00:31:08.868 --> 00:31:11.435 - What the fuck are you doing? 00:31:11.437 --> 00:31:13.470 I don't wanna touch that pillow. 585 00:31:13,472 --> 00:31:13,470 I'm not gonna do it. 00:31:13.472 --> 00:31:16.907 - Why you gotta knock it before you try it. 00:31:18.377 --> 00:31:21.144 It's like shopping. It's shopping. 00:31:21.146 --> 00:31:22.312 - For dicks. 00:31:25.950 --> 00:31:27.284 - Online dating. 00:31:27.286 --> 00:31:29.253 - Weird, right? 00:31:29.255 --> 00:31:32.623 - Totally. I can't even believe I'm here. 00:31:32.625 --> 00:31:36.660 You are so wrong for me. 00:31:36.662 --> 00:31:39.129 - You are such a bore. 00:31:39.131 --> 00:31:43.000 - You're a surfer. 00:31:43.002 --> 00:31:45.002 - You drink wine coolers. 00:31:45.004 --> 00:31:46.937 - You smoke marijuana. 00:31:46.939 --> 00:31:48.472 - You just called it marijuana, 00:31:48.474 --> 00:31:50.474 it's called pot, you loser. 00:31:52.912 --> 00:31:56.213 - If only my coworkers could see me now. 00:31:56.215 --> 00:31:59.483 - Oh, my god, you just said coworkers. 00:31:59.485 --> 00:32:03.954 - Oh, my god, you wanna go back to my place and fuck? 00:32:18.636 --> 00:32:20.537 - Jesus, your place is a nightmare. 00:32:20.539 --> 00:32:22.339 - Oh, god. I love it. 00:32:22.341 --> 00:32:24.007 Give it to me, you big republican. 00:32:24.009 --> 00:32:26.410 - Oh, I'm gonna give it to you, you left wing socialist. 00:32:26.412 --> 00:32:28.679 - I want you to capitalize all over my face. 00:32:49.100 --> 00:32:52.202 - So, you're rendezvous last night? 00:32:52.204 --> 00:32:54.638 - If I was to summarize it, I would say 00:32:54.640 --> 00:32:55.706 - best 610 00:32:55,708 --> 00:32:55,706 - date 00:32:55.708 --> 00:32:58.475 - ever. I mean, who would've known? 00:32:58.477 --> 00:32:59.743 Fucking online dating? 00:32:59.745 --> 00:33:01.111 - Amazing. 00:33:01.113 --> 00:33:03.513 - I mean, it was out of control. 00:33:03.515 --> 00:33:04.715 - I think I might be proud. 00:33:04.717 --> 00:33:08.151 - It sounded scary good, actually. 00:33:08.153 --> 00:33:10.253 - I really went out of my comfort zone, didn't I? 00:33:10.255 --> 00:33:11.455 - I think you did. 00:33:11.457 --> 00:33:13.023 - Who would've thought, you know? 00:33:13.025 --> 00:33:15.092 Like some khaki-wearing 00:33:15.094 --> 00:33:16.426 - marijuana-smoking 00:33:16.428 --> 00:33:17.761 - republican 00:33:17.763 --> 00:33:19.663 - surfer girl hippy. 00:33:19.665 --> 00:33:21.999 - I haven't been fucked like that in so long. 00:33:22.001 --> 00:33:23.767 - I wanted to be in the room watching. 00:33:23.769 --> 00:33:25.002 Taking notes. 00:33:25.004 --> 00:33:26.770 - Did you say hippy? 00:33:26.772 --> 00:33:29.773 - It was like somebody just like bent me over and was like... 00:33:29.775 --> 00:33:32.009 - do me dirty, just do me like an animal. 00:33:32.011 --> 00:33:34.611 - I do know, under the sheets, it was hot. 00:33:34.613 --> 00:33:35.512 - Hot? 00:33:35.514 --> 00:33:36.346 - Hot. 00:33:36.348 --> 00:33:37.381 - Degree-wise, how hot? 00:33:37.383 --> 00:33:39.082 - Fahrenheit or Celsius? 00:33:39.084 --> 00:33:40.450 - Fahrenheit. 00:33:40.452 --> 00:33:41.284 - 104. 00:33:41.286 --> 00:33:42.119 - Now Celsius. 00:33:42.121 --> 00:33:42.719 - 67. 00:33:42.721 --> 00:33:44.388 - That's correct. 00:33:44.390 --> 00:33:46.523 - It was like I saw and sang the star-spangled banner 00:33:46.525 --> 00:33:49.526 all up in my shit, and it was like what? 00:33:49.528 --> 00:33:51.728 - Amazing. Fuck! 00:33:51.730 --> 00:33:53.230 - Will you see her again? 00:33:53.232 --> 00:33:54.731 - Definitely. 00:33:54.733 --> 00:33:57.200 - Oh, definitely. All of him. 00:33:57.202 --> 00:33:58.035 - All of him? 00:33:58.037 --> 00:33:59.669 - All of him. 00:34:05.676 --> 00:34:07.244 - Think your banana republican 00:34:07.246 --> 00:34:08.512 knows it's your birthday? 00:34:08.514 --> 00:34:09.646 - He totally does. 00:34:09.648 --> 00:34:11.281 I wrote it on his calendar. 00:34:11.283 --> 00:34:13.717 - You wrote it on, he has a, what? 00:34:13.719 --> 00:34:16.720 - Oh, my god, he totally knows it's my birthday. 00:34:16.722 --> 00:34:19.623 He said, what, what the shit was that? 00:34:19.625 --> 00:34:21.758 - What do you think he's gonna get you? 00:34:21.760 --> 00:34:24.628 - I don't know. He said it was big. Huge big. 00:34:24.630 --> 00:34:27.397 - Ooh, something big, huh? 00:34:27.399 --> 00:34:29.833 What if it's a new board? 00:34:29.835 --> 00:34:32.669 - Hey, birthday girl. 00:34:32.671 --> 00:34:35.705 Hold on one second, it's quite large. 00:34:45.084 --> 00:34:48.652 - You got me a hamper. 00:34:48.654 --> 00:34:49.719 - Thanks, babe. 00:34:49.721 --> 00:34:50.821 - Good work. 00:34:55.093 --> 00:34:57.394 - So good, right? 00:34:57.396 --> 00:34:58.728 - Totally. 00:35:04.469 --> 00:35:06.503 Honey, look, do you mind if we just try something 00:35:06.505 --> 00:35:08.672 a little different, maybe speed it up a little? 00:35:08.674 --> 00:35:11.875 - Honey, I will ejaculate too fast. 00:35:11.877 --> 00:35:14.478 - Besides, men's fitness said the best results 00:35:14.480 --> 00:35:16.580 come from restraint. 00:35:16.582 --> 00:35:18.882 Trust me. You'll see. 00:35:18.884 --> 00:35:20.283 - Like how? 00:35:20.285 --> 00:35:23.420 - You'll see. 00:35:23.422 --> 00:35:25.822 Ok, second position. 00:35:30.761 --> 00:35:33.263 Whoa, whoa. 00:35:33.265 --> 00:35:35.565 Restraint. 00:35:35.567 --> 00:35:38.802 Trust me. 00:35:38.804 --> 00:35:40.303 - Awesome. 00:35:50.381 --> 00:35:53.383 - That was super. 00:35:53.385 --> 00:35:57.754 And the restraint? Right? 00:35:57.756 --> 00:36:00.223 Makes you want it more. 00:36:00.225 --> 00:36:03.226 - Yeah. 00:36:03.228 --> 00:36:05.262 God, do I want it. 00:37:11.529 --> 00:37:16.399 - Hey, I noticed today that your hamper was full. 00:37:17.501 --> 00:37:18.835 - Yeah. 00:37:18.837 --> 00:37:20.670 - Mine's empty. 00:37:20.672 --> 00:37:21.972 - Yeah. 00:37:21.974 --> 00:37:24.674 - It's empty because I know when it's full, 00:37:24.676 --> 00:37:27.010 it's time to do the laundry. 00:37:27.814 --> 00:37:28.713 - Clever. 00:37:28.714 --> 00:37:33.316 You know, I actually really hate doing laundry, 00:37:33.318 --> 00:37:36.686 so I was just kinda thinking that maybe I would, 00:37:36.688 --> 00:37:38.722 you know, let all my laundry get dirty 00:37:38.724 --> 00:37:41.391 and leave the extra dirty stuff on the floor. 00:37:41.393 --> 00:37:42.726 - You just decided that. 00:37:42.728 --> 00:37:44.761 - Mm-hm. 00:37:44.763 --> 00:37:47.364 Oh, and by the way, I actually drank half a beer last night 00:37:47.366 --> 00:37:50.567 and I left it in the fridge, I figured it would be, 00:37:50.569 --> 00:37:52.636 you know, kind of a pain to go buy 00:37:52.638 --> 00:37:54.771 just a bottle to make six. 00:38:00.411 --> 00:38:03.013 - That, you did. 00:38:03.015 --> 00:38:06.983 - Actually, you know, I'm gonna head out to the garage. 00:38:06.985 --> 00:38:09.052 - Just don't forget our mommy-daddy time later. 00:38:09.054 --> 00:38:11.855 - Mm, that's right. Restraint. 00:38:11.857 --> 00:38:13.757 - Yes. Restraint. 00:38:13.759 --> 00:38:15.625 - You know what, I actually read 00:38:15.627 --> 00:38:17.494 about this new thing in women's fitness 00:38:17.496 --> 00:38:19.629 where you don't have to do anything at all. 00:38:32.810 --> 00:38:34.911 Oh, so you wanna help. 00:38:34.913 --> 00:38:37.414 That's so funny, you've never wanted to help before. 00:38:37.416 --> 00:38:40.884 - Well, I wanted to see what you love so much. 00:38:40.886 --> 00:38:42.719 Increase our intimacy. 00:38:42.721 --> 00:38:45.689 - Mm, you know, it's so funny, I have all this wax 00:38:45.691 --> 00:38:48.792 but I keep misplacing it every week, isn't that strange? 00:38:48.794 --> 00:38:50.727 - Weird. 00:38:50.729 --> 00:38:53.330 Shucks, you know, since your wax is gone, 00:38:53.332 --> 00:38:55.832 why don't we restrain our restraint for the day, 718 00:38:55,834 --> 00:38:55,832 head into the bedroom. 00:38:55.834 --> 00:38:59.502 - Oh, you know what, that's ok, I actually have some. 00:38:59.504 --> 00:39:01.504 I keep an extra stash around in case somebody 00:39:01.506 --> 00:39:03.807 just really wants to ruin my party. 00:39:03.809 --> 00:39:07.877 - What luck. 00:39:07.879 --> 00:39:10.714 Do you need help? Yeah, you need help. 00:39:10.716 --> 00:39:11.948 - No, that's really ok. 00:39:11.950 --> 00:39:15.085 - Nope, just let me go inside and get a knife. 00:39:19.391 --> 00:39:21.491 - I'm just gonna go use the bathroom, ok? Thanks. 00:39:21.493 --> 00:39:22.826 - No, thank you. 00:39:50.688 --> 00:39:52.155 - What the hell is that? 729 00:39:52,157 --> 00:39:52,155 - Sex wax. 00:39:52.157 --> 00:39:56.393 - What the fuck are you doing? You're gonna ruin my board! 00:39:56.395 --> 00:39:57.927 - You didn't do your laundry. 00:39:57.929 --> 00:39:59.829 - Fuck laundry. 00:40:03.935 --> 00:40:05.969 Here's your fucking laundry! 00:40:35.966 --> 00:40:37.734 - Yeah! 00:40:57.823 --> 00:41:01.157 - What did you do? 00:41:01.159 --> 00:41:02.826 - We never have sex anymore. 00:41:02.828 --> 00:41:06.830 - 'Cause it's all about restraint, you goddamn Nazi. 00:41:06.832 --> 00:41:09.732 - You fucking hippy. 00:41:09.734 --> 00:41:12.535 - I am not a hippy! I am a surfer! 00:41:12.537 --> 00:41:14.804 - What the fuck is the difference? 00:41:21.612 --> 00:41:22.879 Oh, god. 00:41:26.750 --> 00:41:30.153 This got really out of control. 00:41:30.155 --> 00:41:31.754 I'm sorry. 00:41:31.756 --> 00:41:34.190 - Yeah, I mean, totally. 00:41:34.192 --> 00:41:38.161 This is all my fault. 00:41:38.163 --> 00:41:40.930 - What were we thinking? Online dating. 00:41:40.932 --> 00:41:43.199 - Oh, my god, fucking online dating. 00:41:43.201 --> 00:41:45.235 Oh, online dating. 00:41:45.237 --> 00:41:47.937 - I'm sorry I killed your board. 00:41:47.939 --> 00:41:51.708 - I've got so many more. 00:41:51.710 --> 00:41:54.944 - You know what, look, I could really use a beer. 00:41:54.946 --> 00:41:59.115 Could you get me a beer, I promise I will replace it. 00:41:59.117 --> 00:42:03.253 - Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, don't worry about the tops. 00:42:03.255 --> 00:42:06.923 I'll go get us a beer. You one, me one, ok? 00:42:08.759 --> 00:42:11.594 - No one ever calls me a fucking hippy. 00:42:17.902 --> 00:42:19.702 - No! 00:42:22.274 --> 00:42:26.042 - Game, set, match, bitches! 00:42:28.580 --> 00:42:31.881 He didn't even know which one was my favorite. 00:42:46.331 --> 00:42:50.099 - Oh, honey! Daddy's home! 00:43:15.192 --> 00:43:17.293 - In shocking news tonight, north Korea has launched 00:43:17.295 --> 00:43:20.229 nuclear weapons at the American coastline. 00:43:40.526 --> 00:43:41.785 - Greetings, friends. 00:43:41.786 --> 00:43:45.788 My name is Pradeep and today I'm here to share with you 00:43:45.790 --> 00:43:48.024 a most important message on how you can have 00:43:48.026 --> 00:43:50.727 all the things you want in your life. 00:43:50.729 --> 00:43:54.731 Love, joy, peace, 00:43:54.733 --> 00:43:58.267 riches, fame, success, 00:43:58.269 --> 00:44:00.036 and happiness can all be yours 00:44:00.038 --> 00:44:02.805 if only you learn to be yourself. 00:44:02.807 --> 00:44:05.642 You see, there are no bad people on this earth. 00:44:05.644 --> 00:44:07.744 There are no good people on this earth. 00:44:07.746 --> 00:44:09.779 There are just people being themselves, 00:44:09.781 --> 00:44:12.749 doing what is best for them. 00:44:12.751 --> 00:44:15.785 And you too can be one of these people. 00:44:15.787 --> 00:44:19.889 For just $19.95 you too can learn to be yourself 00:44:19.891 --> 00:44:22.191 and have all the happiness, riches, 00:44:22.193 --> 00:44:24.060 and success you deserve. 00:44:24.062 --> 00:44:27.230 Call today. 00:44:33.837 --> 00:44:35.905 - Unique New York, unique New York, unique New York, 00:44:35.907 --> 00:44:38.875 unique New York, unique New York, really? 00:44:38.877 --> 00:44:42.378 - I mean, you've been doing this a long time, 00:44:42.380 --> 00:44:44.781 you don't think you've got speaking down yet? 00:44:44.783 --> 00:44:47.083 - You know, as soon as I get the transfer, you can... 00:44:47.085 --> 00:44:51.954 - this is a top 40 market. This is a top 40 market. 00:44:51.956 --> 00:44:53.356 Where you gonna try to go? 00:44:53.358 --> 00:44:55.358 You gonna try to get to buffalo? 00:44:55.360 --> 00:44:56.859 - Can I leave now, are we done? 00:44:56.861 --> 00:44:59.128 - Good luck getting to buffalo. 00:44:59.130 --> 00:45:00.830 Listen, we cover real news here, 00:45:00.832 --> 00:45:05.334 we're not trying to sugarcoat anything, ok? 00:45:05.336 --> 00:45:07.904 Want a gummer real quick or just a quick little bump? 00:45:07.906 --> 00:45:09.906 No? 00:45:09.908 --> 00:45:12.275 - In five, four, three... 00:45:12.277 --> 00:45:13.309 - Good evening. 795 00:45:13,311 --> 00:45:13,309 - Good evening. 00:45:13.311 --> 00:45:16.946 - Tonight we have breaking news that may surprise you. 00:45:16.948 --> 00:45:19.115 Mayor Jimmy Carmichael has been caught on tape 00:45:19.117 --> 00:45:21.117 allegedly smoking crack 00:45:21.119 --> 00:45:24.287 and receiving oral sex from Britney Cummings, 00:45:24.289 --> 00:45:27.857 the sex worker who has been making allegations against him. 00:45:27.859 --> 00:45:30.927 - Well said, well said, Sarah, just to recap, breaking news, 00:45:30.929 --> 00:45:32.795 mayor Cummings, mayor Carmichael, 00:45:32.797 --> 00:45:35.965 has indeed been receive, has allegedly in this video, 00:45:35.967 --> 00:45:37.867 smoking the crack and also receiving 00:45:37.869 --> 00:45:40.903 a b-b-b-bloral 00:45:40.905 --> 00:45:42.905 of his knob and... 00:45:46.977 --> 00:45:49.078 Now we go to the tape, here's the part of the tape 00:45:49.080 --> 00:45:51.481 where he's allegedly receiving oral sex 00:45:51.483 --> 00:45:55.218 and, boy, does it look like it feels great. 00:45:55.220 --> 00:45:56.886 - Great. 00:45:56.888 --> 00:46:00.323 Here the mayor is lighting what seems to be a crack pipe. 00:46:06.431 --> 00:46:08.331 And here you can see... 00:46:08.333 --> 00:46:11.801 - little warning on those tapes. 00:46:11.803 --> 00:46:13.770 - And here the mayor is 00:46:13.772 --> 00:46:16.072 allegedly receiving oral sex. 00:46:16.074 --> 00:46:18.975 - I mean, can we stop with the allegedly game at this point? 00:46:18.977 --> 00:46:21.210 It's the mayor, he's getting his dick sucked, 00:46:21.212 --> 00:46:23.212 uh, penis knobbed upon. 00:46:23.214 --> 00:46:24.947 - Ok, standards and practices. 00:46:24.949 --> 00:46:26.849 - I said knobbed upon, I said knobbed upon, 821 00:46:26,851 --> 00:46:26,849 I corrected it with knobbed upon. 00:46:26.851 --> 00:46:29.886 - Also, legally, we can't accuse someone of something 00:46:29.888 --> 00:46:31.420 they haven't been tried for. 00:46:31.422 --> 00:46:33.389 - But can you acknowledge you can legally say knobbed upon? 00:46:33.391 --> 00:46:36.259 - Robert, would you like to announce the next segment? 00:46:36.261 --> 00:46:37.894 - I'm not sure we're done looking at that tape, 00:46:37.896 --> 00:46:41.898 let's go back to the oral sex part of the videotape. 00:46:41.900 --> 00:46:43.900 - I think we've seen it all. 00:46:43.902 --> 00:46:46.402 - You're sexy, if you could stop being such a bitch. 00:46:53.811 --> 00:46:55.945 - Hello, everyone. 00:46:55.947 --> 00:47:00.183 I want to thank you for joining me on this journey. 00:47:00.185 --> 00:47:04.153 This is a journey of self-discovery. 00:47:04.155 --> 00:47:06.956 At the end of this journey you will discover 00:47:06.958 --> 00:47:09.959 your limitless potential. 00:47:09.961 --> 00:47:12.128 At the core of your potential 00:47:12.130 --> 00:47:15.898 is one simple guiding principle. 00:47:15.900 --> 00:47:19.535 Be yourself. 00:47:19.537 --> 00:47:23.072 - Looking for easy to get along with roommate. 00:47:23.074 --> 00:47:25.608 Beautiful views in Hollywood hills. 00:47:25.610 --> 00:47:27.944 $750 per month. 00:47:27.946 --> 00:47:29.612 - When you are yourself, 00:47:29.614 --> 00:47:34.217 the universe will provide you with all that you need. 00:47:34.219 --> 00:47:36.619 Repeat after me. 00:47:36.621 --> 00:47:40.556 I am myself. 00:47:40.558 --> 00:47:44.560 - I am myself. 00:47:44.562 --> 00:47:49.098 - There is no one else like me. 00:47:49.100 --> 00:47:52.635 - There is no one else like me. 00:47:52.637 --> 00:47:56.472 - Now tell the universe who you are. 00:47:58.175 --> 00:48:02.178 - I am an Oscar-winning actress. 00:48:02.180 --> 00:48:06.482 - Again, tell the universe who you are. 00:48:07.517 --> 00:48:11.387 - I am a famous Oscar-winning actress. 00:48:12.923 --> 00:48:16.425 - Thank you again for joining me on this podcast. 00:48:16.427 --> 00:48:19.295 I want to remind you the universe will provide 00:48:19.297 --> 00:48:21.297 all that you need and want 00:48:21.299 --> 00:48:24.133 when you follow the guiding principle, 00:48:24.135 --> 00:48:26.102 be yourself. 00:48:38.082 --> 00:48:39.348 - Hi! 00:48:39.350 --> 00:48:40.549 - Hey! 00:48:40.551 --> 00:48:41.584 - Maybelline? 00:48:41.586 --> 00:48:42.685 - I'm Maybelline. 00:48:42.687 --> 00:48:44.387 - Hi. 00:48:44.389 --> 00:48:46.989 - I'm so glad I saw your ad for the room for rent. 00:48:46.991 --> 00:48:50.927 This place is amazing, look at this view. 00:48:50.929 --> 00:48:52.995 The only view I have at home is of my neighbor's backyard, 00:48:52.997 --> 00:48:54.463 where he fixes cars. 00:48:54.465 --> 00:48:55.998 He's got some chickens back there too 00:48:56.000 --> 00:48:57.533 but it is nothing like this. 00:48:57.535 --> 00:49:00.503 - Wow. Well, come on in. 00:49:00.505 --> 00:49:03.973 - Ok. 00:49:10.080 --> 00:49:11.347 - Isn't it good? 00:49:11.349 --> 00:49:12.982 - Mm-hm. 00:49:12.984 --> 00:49:14.951 - It's just Kale and celery. 00:49:14.953 --> 00:49:16.986 Sometimes if I'm bad, I add some lemon. 00:49:16.988 --> 00:49:19.689 - Mm, I can taste that lemon, that's tart. 00:49:19.691 --> 00:49:21.090 What's the other thing? 00:49:21.092 --> 00:49:21.691 - Kale. 00:49:21.693 --> 00:49:22.625 - Kale? 00:49:22.627 --> 00:49:23.626 - You've never heard of Kale? 00:49:23.628 --> 00:49:24.961 - What is Kale? 00:49:24.963 --> 00:49:26.595 - It's everything. 00:49:26.597 --> 00:49:28.297 - Is it a meat? 00:49:28.299 --> 00:49:31.133 - No, no, no, it's just a Superfood. It's a Superfood. 00:49:31.135 --> 00:49:33.636 - A Superfood? That's cool. 884 00:49:33,638 --> 00:49:33,636 - Ah, yeah. 00:49:33.638 --> 00:49:36.672 - Gosh, you know about all that stuff, huh? 00:49:36.674 --> 00:49:37.974 - Thank you. 00:49:37.976 --> 00:49:38.708 - So, what do you do? 00:49:38.710 --> 00:49:40.643 - I am an actress, actually. 00:49:40.645 --> 00:49:42.712 - Oh, my god, me too! 00:49:42.714 --> 00:49:44.380 Well, I mean, that's why I moved out here, 00:49:44.382 --> 00:49:45.715 be a big movie star and all. 00:49:45.717 --> 00:49:48.617 Oh, my god, that's so funny. 00:49:48.619 --> 00:49:50.720 - So funny. 00:49:50.722 --> 00:49:53.622 So, do you have any acting experience? 00:49:53.624 --> 00:49:55.458 - Sure don't. 00:49:55.460 --> 00:49:57.159 You know, I'm just a real lucky person, 00:49:57.161 --> 00:49:59.762 so I figured I'd just come on out and get some tryouts. 00:49:59.764 --> 00:50:01.263 - Auditions. 00:50:01.265 --> 00:50:02.565 - What? 00:50:02.567 --> 00:50:04.667 - They're not tryouts, they're auditions. 00:50:04.669 --> 00:50:07.036 - Oh, auditions. 00:50:07.038 --> 00:50:08.471 Oh, my god, bless your heart, 00:50:08.473 --> 00:50:11.240 you got all the wisdom, I can tell. 00:50:11.242 --> 00:50:13.376 So, have you been in anything I've seen? 00:50:13.378 --> 00:50:15.244 - Yeah, actually, I was the starring role 00:50:15.246 --> 00:50:17.413 in the end of the world 2. 00:50:17.415 --> 00:50:19.482 - Is that a TV show? 00:50:19.484 --> 00:50:21.784 - No, it's a blockbuster film. 00:50:21.786 --> 00:50:25.221 - Oh, my god, wow. That's amazing. 00:50:25.223 --> 00:50:28.491 - Yeah, it is, I'm surprised you haven't heard of it. 00:50:28.493 --> 00:50:29.658 - Did it come out last year? 00:50:29.660 --> 00:50:30.693 - No. 00:50:30.695 --> 00:50:32.028 - Year before that? 00:50:32.030 --> 00:50:33.229 - No, I took that year off. 00:50:33.231 --> 00:50:34.196 - The year before that. 00:50:34.198 --> 00:50:35.731 - It was nine years ago. 00:50:35.733 --> 00:50:37.266 - Oh. 00:50:37.268 --> 00:50:39.635 - Anyway, I still audition all the time, so it's... 00:50:39.637 --> 00:50:41.070 - hard to get a job, huh? 00:50:41.072 --> 00:50:42.438 - No, not for me. 00:50:42.440 --> 00:50:44.774 I mean, like sometimes for me it is, 00:50:44.776 --> 00:50:46.809 because either I'm too talented 00:50:46.811 --> 00:50:49.412 or like they think that I'm too pretty for it 00:50:49.414 --> 00:50:50.780 or all that sort of thing. 00:50:50.782 --> 00:50:52.281 But I don't let it get me down 'cause I have 00:50:52.283 --> 00:50:54.116 this spiritual adviser that I listen to, 00:50:54.118 --> 00:50:55.718 spiritual adviser Pradeep. 00:50:55.720 --> 00:50:57.119 - Spiritual guru Pradeep! 00:50:57.121 --> 00:50:58.687 - Spiritual adviser. 00:50:58.689 --> 00:51:01.323 - I listen to spiritual guru Pradeep too, 00:51:01.325 --> 00:51:02.792 I love him. 00:51:02.794 --> 00:51:05.361 Tell the universe who you are. 00:51:05.363 --> 00:51:07.830 I'm Maybelline from Mississippi. 00:51:07.832 --> 00:51:10.633 - Ok, I think it's a little bit more complicated than that. 00:51:10.635 --> 00:51:13.169 - Is there a side b, 'cause that's all he says on mine. 00:51:13.171 --> 00:51:15.571 - No, it's just, who you are 00:51:15.573 --> 00:51:17.673 isn't just where you come from. 00:51:17.675 --> 00:51:22.244 - It's like how much you weigh and how tall you are? 00:51:44.868 --> 00:51:46.502 - Yeah, it just felt like, 00:51:46.504 --> 00:51:49.605 I felt like really connected the entire time, 00:51:49.607 --> 00:51:51.774 and I think with Sarah, like that character just, 942 00:51:51,776 --> 00:51:51,774 she really lives in me. 00:51:51.776 --> 00:51:55.144 - You did a fantastic job, so we'll see 00:51:55.146 --> 00:51:56.445 how it all plays out. 00:51:56.447 --> 00:51:57.646 - Totally understand. 00:51:57.648 --> 00:51:59.315 - I should probably get out of here. 00:51:59.317 --> 00:52:00.616 - You're kidding, come on, 00:52:00.618 --> 00:52:01.584 come in for one drink. 00:52:01.586 --> 00:52:02.818 - Ok, one drink. 00:52:06.490 --> 00:52:08.424 - Oh. 00:52:08.426 --> 00:52:09.592 - Hey. 00:52:09.594 --> 00:52:11.327 - You're awake. 00:52:11.329 --> 00:52:12.628 - Hey, I'm Maybelline. 00:52:12.630 --> 00:52:13.762 - Ben. 00:52:13.764 --> 00:52:15.631 - Y'all come in, come in. 00:52:15.633 --> 00:52:17.666 - Ok. 00:52:17.668 --> 00:52:19.602 Ew, what are you eating there? 00:52:19.604 --> 00:52:23.139 - Nachos supreme. Extra cheese. 00:52:23.141 --> 00:52:25.374 - Wow. 00:52:25.376 --> 00:52:26.709 - Oh, what kind of meat is that? 00:52:26.711 --> 00:52:28.777 - Canned. Yummy. You want some? 00:52:28.779 --> 00:52:30.779 - No, god no. 00:52:30.781 --> 00:52:32.548 - So, what ya do, Ben? 00:52:32.550 --> 00:52:33.682 - I make movies. 00:52:33.684 --> 00:52:35.484 - No kidding. 00:52:35.486 --> 00:52:37.786 - Ben is a producer friend of mine 00:52:37.788 --> 00:52:40.356 who is making a movie that I'm gonna be in. 00:52:43.261 --> 00:52:46.695 You know, I'm really looking forward to meeting the team. 969 00:52:46,697 --> 00:52:46,695 - Yeah. 00:52:46.697 --> 00:52:51.634 - I wanted to tell you earlier, but I loved that script, 00:52:51.636 --> 00:52:54.336 it's just so, it has such depth to it. 00:52:54.338 --> 00:52:57.239 - Mm. So good. 00:52:57.241 --> 00:53:00.342 - And that character Sarah, I just felt like I related 00:53:00.344 --> 00:53:02.711 to her, you know, she's just so emotionally torn. 00:53:02.713 --> 00:53:03.812 - Excuse me. 00:53:03.814 --> 00:53:05.181 - Yeah. 00:53:05.183 --> 00:53:07.449 I guess what I'm trying to say is just 00:53:07.451 --> 00:53:09.385 it's before its time. 00:53:09.387 --> 00:53:12.288 - Well, it's just an action movie. 00:53:12.290 --> 00:53:14.490 - I love action movies. 00:53:14.492 --> 00:53:15.824 I mean, you always end up cheering 00:53:15.826 --> 00:53:17.826 and then like the good guys always win 00:53:17.828 --> 00:53:19.662 and the bad guys always lose. 00:53:19.664 --> 00:53:22.965 - Yes. Yes, they do. 00:53:22.967 --> 00:53:25.768 - Maybelline's so simple, it's so cute. 00:53:25.770 --> 00:53:27.670 - I just call it like I see it. 00:53:27.672 --> 00:53:31.407 - No, no, I love that. See, nobody does that out here. 00:53:31.409 --> 00:53:34.910 - You know what else is funny is she's from Mississippi, 00:53:34.912 --> 00:53:36.612 she's a Mississippi girl. 00:53:36.614 --> 00:53:39.315 - Mississippi? No fucking way, my dad is from Mississippi. 00:53:39.317 --> 00:53:40.816 - Really? Where? 00:53:40.818 --> 00:53:41.850 - Meridian. 00:53:41.852 --> 00:53:43.752 - I got family in meridian. 00:53:43.754 --> 00:53:45.688 I try to go out there at least a couple times a year, 00:53:45.690 --> 00:53:48.891 my uncle's a high school football coach there. 00:53:48.893 --> 00:53:50.759 - Go wildcats! 00:53:52.830 --> 00:53:55.898 - Go wildcats. 00:53:55.900 --> 00:53:58.234 - So, what brings you out here? 00:53:58.236 --> 00:54:00.302 Wait, let me guess. Acting. 00:54:00.304 --> 00:54:02.805 - Me? No. 00:54:02.807 --> 00:54:05.374 I mean, I'd love to but, 00:54:05.376 --> 00:54:07.643 I mean, Juliana, she's the pro. 00:54:07.645 --> 00:54:09.945 - She's never done an audition in her entire life, 00:54:09.947 --> 00:54:11.647 like she has no experience. 00:54:11.649 --> 00:54:15.251 - No, no, nonsense. 00:54:15.253 --> 00:54:16.585 You know what, you'd be perfect 1007 00:54:16,587 --> 00:54:16,585 for a project I'm working on. 00:54:16.587 --> 00:54:20.956 I mean, we need real people, we need funny people. 00:54:20.958 --> 00:54:24.460 - I mean, I don't know if I could act funny. 00:54:24.462 --> 00:54:26.395 - But you know who can is me 'cause, 00:54:26.397 --> 00:54:29.465 when I was on the set of the end of the world part two, 00:54:29.467 --> 00:54:32.968 there was this part where we just had to improv on set 00:54:32.970 --> 00:54:35.704 and we had to like punch up the script by improving. 00:54:35.706 --> 00:54:37.940 - No, no, I don't want you to act at all. 00:54:37.942 --> 00:54:39.642 I mean, that's the problem with actors, 00:54:39.644 --> 00:54:40.809 they're always acting. 00:54:40.811 --> 00:54:43.646 I just want you to be yourself. 00:54:43.648 --> 00:54:47.283 - Just be myself? 00:54:47.285 --> 00:54:49.685 - Be yourself. 00:54:49.687 --> 00:54:50.853 - Just like Pradeep. 00:54:50.855 --> 00:54:54.556 - Oh, yes, just like Pradeep, Maybelline. 00:54:54.558 --> 00:54:56.959 - I'm Maybelline and I'm from Mississippi. 00:54:56.961 --> 00:54:58.560 - Damn right you are. 00:55:00.564 --> 00:55:03.465 - Yeah. Oh, fine. 00:55:06.971 --> 00:55:10.839 Ok. Let's give it a try. 00:55:10.841 --> 00:55:12.941 - Ok. Here goes. 00:55:15.945 --> 00:55:17.746 Who wants a beer? 00:55:17.748 --> 00:55:19.048 Bartender's been giving me the eye all night, 00:55:19.050 --> 00:55:21.083 I bet I can get 'em for free. 00:55:21.085 --> 00:55:22.685 After what we been through today, 00:55:22.687 --> 00:55:25.821 we deserve a few beers, right? 00:55:25.823 --> 00:55:28.590 Damn, you girls are the best. 00:55:28.592 --> 00:55:30.626 I'd do anything for y'all. 00:55:30.628 --> 00:55:31.827 I mean that. 00:55:36.700 --> 00:55:37.800 - Huh. 00:55:37.802 --> 00:55:39.835 - What'd ya think? 00:55:39.837 --> 00:55:42.471 - Nothing, I mean, it's just, 00:55:42.473 --> 00:55:44.707 you know, uh, 00:55:44.709 --> 00:55:47.376 thing is is that you have to stand out. 00:55:47.378 --> 00:55:48.844 You know, like you have to read 00:55:48.846 --> 00:55:51.347 between the lines, subtext? 00:55:51.349 --> 00:55:54.717 So, for example, I want you to imagine 00:55:54.719 --> 00:55:57.686 that nobody ever gets the beers, ok? 00:55:57.688 --> 00:55:59.922 And it really pisses you off. 00:55:59.924 --> 00:56:01.657 - But... 00:56:01.659 --> 00:56:03.559 - Maybelline, trust me on this, I've done it before. 00:56:03.561 --> 00:56:05.060 - But Ben said just to be myself. 00:56:05.062 --> 00:56:06.829 - Maybelline, this is Hollywood, 00:56:06.831 --> 00:56:09.031 nobody really wants you to be yourself. 00:56:09.033 --> 00:56:13.102 - Ok. 00:56:13.104 --> 00:56:15.137 Who wants a beer? 00:56:15.139 --> 00:56:17.906 Bartender's been giving me the eye all night. 00:56:17.908 --> 00:56:20.075 - Perfect. That was great. 00:56:20.077 --> 00:56:22.044 Ok, now for the next two lines, 00:56:22.046 --> 00:56:26.515 I want you to be confused and sad. 00:56:26.517 --> 00:56:29.451 - Maybe I can get 'em for free. 00:56:29.453 --> 00:56:31.787 After what we've been through, 00:56:31.789 --> 00:56:35.824 we deserve a few beers, right? 00:56:35.826 --> 00:56:37.860 - Perfect. Ok, great. 00:56:37.862 --> 00:56:41.597 And now to bring it home, I want you to act crazy, 00:56:41.599 --> 00:56:44.066 completely crazy, I want you to act like a gorilla. 00:56:44.068 --> 00:56:47.469 - Like a real gorilla? 00:56:47.471 --> 00:56:51.039 Damn. 00:56:51.041 --> 00:56:53.776 You girls are the best! 00:56:53.778 --> 00:56:57.513 I'd do anything for y'all! 00:56:57.515 --> 00:56:59.782 I mean that! 00:56:59.784 --> 00:57:03.118 - Yes, perfect! That was perfect. 00:57:03.120 --> 00:57:06.121 Last thing, at all times when you walk in there, 00:57:06.123 --> 00:57:08.724 I want you to have some mystery behind your eyes, 00:57:08.726 --> 00:57:10.893 so that you'll always keep them guessing, like, 00:57:10.895 --> 00:57:15.431 who is she, what does she want, where is she from? 00:57:15.433 --> 00:57:17.666 Exactly. Just like that. 00:57:17.668 --> 00:57:22.004 Do it exactly like that. 00:57:26.977 --> 00:57:30.946 - Now tell the universe who you are. 00:57:30.948 --> 00:57:35.684 - I am a famous Oscar-winning actress. 00:57:35.686 --> 00:57:39.855 - Again, tell the universe who you are. 00:57:39.857 --> 00:57:42.724 - I am a famous Oscar-winning actress. 00:57:55.239 --> 00:57:57.606 - How'd it go? 00:57:57.608 --> 00:57:59.842 - I don't know. 00:57:59.844 --> 00:58:01.643 I mean, I got so confused 00:58:01.645 --> 00:58:03.178 and everybody was staring at me 00:58:03.180 --> 00:58:06.682 and I didn't do any of the stuff we talked about. 00:58:06.684 --> 00:58:08.851 - Oh, well, there'll be other chances. 00:58:08.853 --> 00:58:10.085 - You think? 00:58:10.087 --> 00:58:12.788 - Not with that casting director. 00:58:12.790 --> 00:58:15.691 - Well, at least I got to meet Ben. 00:58:15.693 --> 00:58:18.927 - Honey, he's never gonna call you again. 00:58:26.103 --> 00:58:29.204 - He said I did a great job, Ben said I did a great job. 00:58:29.206 --> 00:58:31.607 - Ok, I don't know what you're getting so excited about 00:58:31.609 --> 00:58:33.909 because obviously he's just trying to be nice. 00:58:33.911 --> 00:58:35.878 You didn't do any of the stuff that we talked about, right? 00:58:35.880 --> 00:58:36.945 - I was just myself. 00:58:36.947 --> 00:58:39.715 - Exactly. 00:58:42.253 --> 00:58:43.719 - He said he wants to have dinner, 00:58:43.721 --> 00:58:45.220 Ben wants to have dinner with me. 00:58:45.222 --> 00:58:46.822 - Can't you just see that he's trying to fuck you? 00:58:46.824 --> 00:58:48.290 You're so naive. 00:58:50.961 --> 00:58:52.294 - Holy shit! 00:58:52.296 --> 00:58:54.830 - Oh, is he sending you dick pics now? 00:58:54.832 --> 00:58:57.866 - I got the part. I got the part. 1101 00:58:57,868 --> 00:58:57,866 - What? 00:58:57.868 --> 00:59:00.569 - I got the part! I got the part! 00:59:06.110 --> 00:59:09.845 I'm a real actress, I'm a real actress, I'm a real actress! 00:59:12.883 --> 00:59:14.716 - Pradeep. 00:59:14.718 --> 00:59:18.787 I am a famous Oscar-winning actress. 00:59:18.789 --> 00:59:21.823 I am a famous Oscar-winning actress! 00:59:21.825 --> 00:59:24.293 I am a famous Oscar-winning actress! 00:59:24.295 --> 00:59:28.230 I am a famous Oscar-winning actress! 00:59:28.232 --> 00:59:29.765 - Juliana? 00:59:36.606 --> 00:59:39.908 Juliana? 00:59:39.910 --> 00:59:42.244 - Ok, no, no, no. What am I doing? 00:59:42.246 --> 00:59:44.947 I don't even care that you got this movie 00:59:44.949 --> 00:59:49.084 because it is a stupid movie that's never gonna get made, 00:59:49.086 --> 00:59:51.153 most of these things never get made. 00:59:52.890 --> 00:59:56.658 - We're shooting next month! 00:59:56.660 --> 00:59:57.960 - You don't deserve this! 00:59:57.962 --> 01:00:00.862 Because you just got here and you drink beer 01:00:00.864 --> 01:00:02.898 and you burp and you eat canned meat 01:00:02.900 --> 01:00:05.934 and you're not talented and I am an actress 01:00:05.936 --> 01:00:07.736 and I dedicated my life to this and this is my craft 01:00:07.738 --> 01:00:09.738 and I deserve this! 01:00:09.740 --> 01:00:11.873 That movie is going to fail! 01:00:13.143 --> 01:00:15.277 - It's gonna be a trilogy. 01:00:18.615 --> 01:00:20.015 Yes! 01:00:34.865 --> 01:00:36.298 - Who wants a beer? 01:00:36.300 --> 01:00:37.966 The bartender's been giving me the eye all night. 01:00:37.968 --> 01:00:40.268 Who wants a beer, who... 1128 01:00:40,270 --> 01:00:40,268 Who wants a beer? 01:00:40.270 --> 01:00:43.839 The bartender's been giving me the eye all night. 01:00:45.809 --> 01:00:47.409 I'm auditioning for this big studio film 01:00:47.411 --> 01:00:48.877 and I have to get it just right. 01:00:48.879 --> 01:00:51.079 - That's great. Take your medicine. 01:00:58.054 --> 01:00:59.721 - Who wants a beer? 01:00:59.723 --> 01:01:01.723 The bartender's been giving me the eye all night. 1135 01:01:01,725 --> 01:01:01,723 Who wants a beer, the bartender's been giving me 01:01:01.725 --> 01:01:05.360 the eye all night, who wants a beer, the bartender's 01:01:05.362 --> 01:01:07.095 been giving me the eye all night, who wants a beer, 01:01:07.097 --> 01:01:08.964 who wants a beer, who wants a beer, 01:01:08.966 --> 01:01:13.168 the bartender's been giving me the eye all night. 01:01:27.316 --> 01:01:29.785 - Good afternoon. 01:01:29.787 --> 01:01:33.422 I come before you today to tell you the truth. 01:01:34.791 --> 01:01:38.794 I smoked crack. 01:01:38.796 --> 01:01:43.331 And according to the tape, I also had sex. 01:01:43.333 --> 01:01:45.767 I don't remember having sex, 01:01:45.769 --> 01:01:47.936 I was on drugs. 01:01:47.938 --> 01:01:49.938 I'm sure many of you have had nights 01:01:49.940 --> 01:01:51.306 that you don't remember, 01:01:51.308 --> 01:01:54.776 nights that, well, that you regret. 01:01:56.012 --> 01:02:00.782 And that's why drugs are bad. 01:02:00.784 --> 01:02:02.984 Just say no. 01:02:05.288 --> 01:02:07.823 I won't be taking any questions at this time. 01:02:07.825 --> 01:02:09.858 Thank you. 01:02:16.032 --> 01:02:17.232 - Good evening. 01:02:17.234 --> 01:02:19.101 Tonight another one one one sit-down 01:02:19.103 --> 01:02:20.736 with mayor Carmichael. 01:02:20.738 --> 01:02:24.840 The topic, the mayor's parking lot sex scandal. 01:02:24.842 --> 01:02:27.075 Good evening, Mr. mayor, thank you for being here. 01:02:27.077 --> 01:02:28.777 - Thank you for having me. 01:02:28.779 --> 01:02:33.014 - Mr. mayor, you were caught on tape smoking crack. 01:02:36.085 --> 01:02:38.920 - I told the voters the truth. 01:02:38.922 --> 01:02:42.424 - That you smoked crack. 01:02:42.426 --> 01:02:43.825 - Yes. 01:02:43.827 --> 01:02:48.096 - And had sex with a prostitute. 01:02:48.098 --> 01:02:50.866 - According to the tape. 01:02:50.868 --> 01:02:53.335 - The tape does show her head in your lap. 01:02:53.337 --> 01:02:54.536 - You want specifics? 01:02:54.538 --> 01:02:56.171 - Yes. 01:02:56.173 --> 01:02:58.540 - Well, technically, the tape shows her head 01:02:58.542 --> 01:03:00.375 underneath the steering wheel, 01:03:00.377 --> 01:03:02.277 we don't know what she was doing, 01:03:02.279 --> 01:03:06.081 and, uh, I can't remember. 01:03:07.350 --> 01:03:09.785 Technically, we don't know what happened. 01:03:09.787 --> 01:03:12.454 - Possibilities you can think of? 01:03:12.456 --> 01:03:14.856 - Uh... 01:03:14.858 --> 01:03:16.792 We haven't done any background checks on her 01:03:16.794 --> 01:03:18.860 to see if she has a mechanics license, 01:03:18.862 --> 01:03:21.196 'cause that would make a lot of sense for me, 01:03:21.198 --> 01:03:24.499 and if a fellow citizen did drop a contact lens, 01:03:24.501 --> 01:03:27.269 I would be the first one to help them try to find it. 01:03:27.271 --> 01:03:29.971 - Let's move on to another topic then. 01:03:29.973 --> 01:03:32.574 - Mayor Carmichael, last time you were here, 01:03:32.576 --> 01:03:37.546 you claimed you had never met Britney Cummings. 01:03:39.081 --> 01:03:41.149 - That's true. 01:03:41.151 --> 01:03:44.853 As I said before, I was on drugs, 01:03:44.855 --> 01:03:49.291 so I cannot remember what I did or didn't do that night 01:03:49.293 --> 01:03:53.562 or who I'd met, so that was the truth. 01:03:53.564 --> 01:03:57.399 I told you the truth as I knew it. 01:03:57.401 --> 01:03:59.467 - Some say you have a moral obligation 01:03:59.469 --> 01:04:02.270 to step down from office. 01:04:02.272 --> 01:04:06.041 - I am being crucified for telling the truth. 01:04:06.043 --> 01:04:08.944 It was my public safety initiative that was responsible 01:04:08.946 --> 01:04:10.512 for the installation of cameras 01:04:10.514 --> 01:04:12.581 in all public parking facilities. 01:04:12.583 --> 01:04:15.550 I sacrificed my privacy 01:04:15.552 --> 01:04:18.186 for the safety of this city's citizens. 01:04:18.188 --> 01:04:20.222 Since I've been in office, there's been 01:04:20.224 --> 01:04:22.157 a 23% reduction in crime, 01:04:22.159 --> 01:04:25.260 and a 15% reduction in violent crime. 01:04:25.262 --> 01:04:27.262 Safety. 01:04:27.264 --> 01:04:28.930 - But that's beside the point. 01:04:28.932 --> 01:04:31.399 - Do you mean to tell me that you're not interested 01:04:31.401 --> 01:04:33.201 in your fellow citizens' safety? 01:04:33.203 --> 01:04:35.070 - No, of course, I'm not saying that. 01:04:35.072 --> 01:04:38.573 - Our citizens deserve safety. 01:04:38.575 --> 01:04:41.543 Safety is American. 01:04:41.545 --> 01:04:44.179 And I'm a patriot. 01:04:44.181 --> 01:04:46.414 Do you love your country, Sarah? 01:04:46.416 --> 01:04:48.149 - Yes, of course I love my country. 01:04:48.151 --> 01:04:50.652 - Safety. It's American. 01:04:50.654 --> 01:04:53.588 Government watching over its citizens 01:04:53.590 --> 01:04:55.891 is what makes us great. 01:04:55.893 --> 01:04:58.460 - Don't you mean government watching out 01:04:58.462 --> 01:05:01.563 for its citizens is what makes us safe? 01:05:01.565 --> 01:05:03.932 - If you believe in safety, 01:05:03.934 --> 01:05:06.635 vote Carmichael for mayor come this fall. 01:05:06.637 --> 01:05:09.537 I wanna thank you all for joining us this evening. 01:05:09.539 --> 01:05:11.940 Good night. 01:05:11.942 --> 01:05:13.642 - Good night. 01:05:19.682 --> 01:05:24.219 - Wow. This Rosemary chicken looks amazing. 01:05:24.221 --> 01:05:25.654 - You're amazing. 01:05:25.656 --> 01:05:26.922 - What? 01:05:26.924 --> 01:05:29.190 - You're amazing. 01:05:29.192 --> 01:05:30.625 I know we've only been dating three weeks, 01:05:30.627 --> 01:05:34.162 but, god, I feel, 01:05:34.164 --> 01:05:36.364 it's just going really well, isn't it? 01:05:36.366 --> 01:05:38.633 - I know. Totally. 01:05:38.635 --> 01:05:39.501 - I didn't wanna 01:05:39.503 --> 01:05:40.669 - say anything? 01:05:42.339 --> 01:05:43.705 - I know, you never wanna 01:05:43.707 --> 01:05:45.440 - come on too strong? 01:06:07.530 --> 01:06:09.698 - Yeah. 01:06:09.700 --> 01:06:11.566 Man, I need that. 01:06:11.568 --> 01:06:13.568 - Good job. 01:06:13.570 --> 01:06:15.370 - You were incredible. 01:06:15.372 --> 01:06:18.206 - I loved it. I like it from behind. 01:06:18.208 --> 01:06:20.075 - Yeah. Me too. 01:06:20.077 --> 01:06:22.377 - Be right back. 01:06:22.379 --> 01:06:23.545 - All right. 01:06:33.756 --> 01:06:35.557 Had a great time yesterday. 01:06:35.559 --> 01:06:38.426 Still exhausted. Free to do it again? 01:06:38.428 --> 01:06:40.495 I mean lunch, you naughty girl. 01:06:40.497 --> 01:06:43.498 Get you mind out of the gutter. Lol. 01:06:43.500 --> 01:06:46.234 - Definitely. Same time same place. 01:06:46.236 --> 01:06:50.672 And it's ok, I'm down to skip lunch too. 01:06:50.674 --> 01:06:54.175 Fyi, I'm trying on different lingerie. Wanna see? 01:06:54.177 --> 01:06:56.544 - Yes, please. Why don't you wear it next time? 01:06:56.546 --> 01:06:58.613 - And you can rip it off me. 01:07:13.796 --> 01:07:16.731 - Who the fuck is this? 01:07:16.733 --> 01:07:19.634 - Who the fuck is this? 01:07:19.636 --> 01:07:22.470 - I'm the girl at Derrick's place right now. 01:07:34.717 --> 01:07:36.651 - So did you confront him? 01:07:36.653 --> 01:07:37.619 - No. 1253 01:07:37,621 --> 01:07:37,619 - Why not? 01:07:37.621 --> 01:07:41.089 - I didn't wanna give that fucker the satisfaction. 01:07:41.091 --> 01:07:43.625 I'm his fuck-buddy, he's my fuck-buddy. 01:07:43.627 --> 01:07:45.093 - Good point. 01:07:50.066 --> 01:07:51.666 You think there are others? 01:07:51.668 --> 01:07:53.435 - How would he have the time? 01:07:53.437 --> 01:07:54.636 - How many times a week do you see him? 01:07:54.638 --> 01:07:56.071 - Two to three. 01:07:56.073 --> 01:07:57.505 - We're at the one to two stage. 01:07:57.507 --> 01:08:00.809 - Oh. 01:08:00.811 --> 01:08:03.678 - I mean, honestly, it's just for sex, 01:08:03.680 --> 01:08:05.180 which is totally fine with me, 01:08:05.182 --> 01:08:06.648 I'm not the relationship type. 01:08:06.650 --> 01:08:09.851 - Oh, neither. 01:08:09.853 --> 01:08:12.687 - Still, annoying to get surprised. 01:08:12.689 --> 01:08:14.322 - I hate the surprise. 01:08:14.324 --> 01:08:15.356 - That fucker. 01:08:15.358 --> 01:08:16.825 - That fucker. 01:08:19.695 --> 01:08:23.598 - Well, the least we can do is return the favor. 01:08:23.600 --> 01:08:26.835 - What? Like confront him? 01:08:26.837 --> 01:08:28.603 - I'd love to kill him. 01:08:35.778 --> 01:08:39.514 - Wow. This Rosemary chicken looks amazing. 01:08:39.516 --> 01:08:41.182 - You're amazing. 01:08:41.184 --> 01:08:42.450 - What? 01:08:42.452 --> 01:08:44.185 - You're amazing. 01:08:44.187 --> 01:08:45.687 I know we've only been dating three weeks, 01:08:45.689 --> 01:08:49.858 but, god, I feel, 01:08:49.860 --> 01:08:52.794 it's just going really well, isn't it? 01:08:52.796 --> 01:08:55.363 - I know. Totally. 01:08:55.365 --> 01:08:57.132 I feel the same way, I just 01:08:57.134 --> 01:08:59.667 - didn't wanna say anything. 01:08:59.669 --> 01:09:01.369 - I know, you never wanna 01:09:01.371 --> 01:09:02.737 - come on too strong. 01:09:08.879 --> 01:09:11.346 - I'm not expecting anyone. 01:09:11.348 --> 01:09:12.647 Bizarre. 01:09:19.889 --> 01:09:20.688 - Hi, honey. 01:09:20.690 --> 01:09:21.623 - Hi there, cutie. 01:09:21.625 --> 01:09:24.692 - Hey. Girls. 01:09:24.694 --> 01:09:26.528 - I think that's his o-face. 01:09:26.530 --> 01:09:27.729 - His o-face? 01:09:27.731 --> 01:09:31.499 - You know, his, oh, oh, oh! 01:09:32.501 --> 01:09:34.669 - His o-face. 01:09:34.671 --> 01:09:36.337 Although, you know what, come to think of it, 01:09:36.339 --> 01:09:37.672 I was never really looking at his face. 01:09:37.674 --> 01:09:39.674 - Me neither. He wasn't that good. 01:09:39.676 --> 01:09:41.176 - Right? Kind of a letdown. 01:09:41.178 --> 01:09:43.711 - Least it's cardio. 01:09:43.713 --> 01:09:46.681 - Wow. You weren't kidding. 01:09:46.683 --> 01:09:48.750 - No, I don't kid around. 01:09:48.752 --> 01:09:50.185 - So there's that. 01:09:51.788 --> 01:09:53.755 - That fucker. 01:09:56.292 --> 01:09:59.260 - Honey. 01:09:59.262 --> 01:10:00.361 Are you ok? 01:10:00.363 --> 01:10:02.230 - Wait. 01:10:02.232 --> 01:10:03.665 What happened? 01:10:03.667 --> 01:10:04.966 Who are you? 01:10:04.968 --> 01:10:06.367 - You passed out. 01:10:06.369 --> 01:10:07.835 - Right after we shot Derrick. 01:10:11.775 --> 01:10:12.807 Rookie. 01:10:12.809 --> 01:10:14.542 - Takes time. 01:10:16.679 --> 01:10:19.747 - Ok, let's try this again. 01:10:19.749 --> 01:10:21.382 I'm Kayla. 01:10:21.384 --> 01:10:22.650 - And I'm Dana. 01:10:22.652 --> 01:10:23.985 And we're the other two girls that Derrick 01:10:23.987 --> 01:10:28.623 was fucking behind your back. 01:10:28.625 --> 01:10:30.792 - That fucker. 01:11:45.668 --> 01:11:47.935 Do you think people are gonna look for him? 01:11:47.937 --> 01:11:50.305 - Who, like other girls? 01:11:50.307 --> 01:11:51.806 - I don't know, his family? 01:11:51.808 --> 01:11:53.608 This is bad, isn't it? 01:11:53.610 --> 01:11:54.876 - It did tire me out. 01:11:54.878 --> 01:11:56.444 - I know, right? 01:11:56.446 --> 01:12:00.581 - I'm serious. I don't wanna go to jail. 01:12:00.583 --> 01:12:02.717 - You know, it's been a long night. 01:12:02.719 --> 01:12:04.052 - It has, hasn't it? 01:12:04.054 --> 01:12:05.720 - Julie, why don't you grab the shovel? 01:12:05.722 --> 01:12:07.522 - Good idea. 01:12:19.802 --> 01:12:23.037 - Ok, I'm spent. Someone take over. 01:12:23.039 --> 01:12:27.408 - Well, I killed him, that's my manual labor for the day. 01:12:27.410 --> 01:12:28.843 - Fair enough. 01:12:38.954 --> 01:12:40.722 That should do it. 01:12:40.724 --> 01:12:42.657 - Are you kidding me? 01:12:42.659 --> 01:12:44.659 - Let's go get that body. 01:12:44.661 --> 01:12:47.362 - Ok. 01:12:47.364 --> 01:12:50.431 Come on, Julie. 01:13:38.148 --> 01:13:40.782 - Well. That worked out well. 01:13:40.784 --> 01:13:41.816 - Right? 01:13:41.818 --> 01:13:43.718 They both fit in the same hole. 01:13:43.720 --> 01:13:44.819 Two for one. 01:13:44.821 --> 01:13:45.686 - Good job. 01:13:45.688 --> 01:13:46.687 - Thanks. 01:13:46.689 --> 01:13:47.655 - Let's go. 01:13:47.657 --> 01:13:48.723 - Ok. 01:14:19.021 --> 01:14:21.088 I'm gonna go inside, do you want anything? 01:14:21.090 --> 01:14:22.723 - No, I'm ok. 01:14:57.226 --> 01:14:58.693 - Ready? 01:14:58.695 --> 01:15:01.496 - I'm so tired. 01:15:01.498 --> 01:15:03.231 Do you mind if we crash for a while 01:15:03.233 --> 01:15:05.233 before we go back to L.A.? 01:15:05.235 --> 01:15:07.835 - No, not at all. 01:15:07.837 --> 01:15:09.871 You know, I'm really hungry so it might be good 01:15:09.873 --> 01:15:11.739 to order something to eat. 01:15:11.741 --> 01:15:13.941 - Yeah. You know, like, maybe pizza? 01:15:13.943 --> 01:15:15.676 - Yeah, that'd be great. 01:15:33.695 --> 01:15:35.796 Yeah, one pepperoni pizza. 01:15:35.798 --> 01:15:36.964 Thanks. 01:15:41.770 --> 01:15:43.137 I'm gonna go get ice. 01:15:43.139 --> 01:15:44.639 - Ok. 01:16:04.660 --> 01:16:05.760 Is that you? 01:16:05.762 --> 01:16:07.128 - Yep. 01:16:07.130 --> 01:16:08.963 You know, I really feel as though 01:16:08.965 --> 01:16:12.867 we've become really good friends. 01:16:12.869 --> 01:16:16.237 - Yeah. I feel the same way. 01:16:16.239 --> 01:16:18.973 I mean, I can't believe I've only known you for three days. 01:16:18.975 --> 01:16:20.641 Feels like I've known you forever. 01:16:20.643 --> 01:16:23.110 You know, who says women can't be friends? 01:16:23.112 --> 01:16:24.112 - Right. 01:16:25.782 --> 01:16:27.748 - Didn't you just order pizza? 01:16:27.750 --> 01:16:30.184 - Yes. He couldn't have been that fast. 01:16:30.186 --> 01:16:31.686 Who do you think it is? 01:16:31.688 --> 01:16:33.287 - I don't know. Go check. 01:16:33.289 --> 01:16:35.289 - What if it's the fucking cops? 01:16:46.201 --> 01:16:49.270 - Ok. I'm coming out. 01:16:56.979 --> 01:16:58.346 What the fuck? 01:17:02.918 --> 01:17:04.619 - Cranky's pizza. 01:17:08.690 --> 01:17:10.324 Five minutes or it's, 01:17:10.326 --> 01:17:13.761 well, hello there, ladies. 01:17:13.763 --> 01:17:15.863 - Well, that was fast. 01:17:15.865 --> 01:17:18.099 - Apparently not fast enough. 01:17:18.101 --> 01:17:19.266 - You're kidding, right? 01:17:19.268 --> 01:17:20.267 Come on, we got the pizzas, 01:17:20.269 --> 01:17:22.837 now just get out of here. 01:17:22.839 --> 01:17:24.271 - All right, sorry. 01:17:24.273 --> 01:17:28.042 The sodas are warm. 01:17:28.044 --> 01:17:30.378 Hey, why do y'all got a shovel in here? 01:17:41.658 --> 01:17:43.190 Kinky. 01:17:49.431 --> 01:17:51.666 - In a stunning event, mayor Carmichael 01:17:51.668 --> 01:17:54.235 has been re-elected as mayor. 01:17:58.373 --> 01:18:02.176 - Good afternoon and America. 01:18:02.178 --> 01:18:05.813 The mayor of Carmichael has... 01:18:07.282 --> 01:18:10.384 - Apparently, voters responded to his integrity 01:18:10.386 --> 01:18:14.889 and honesty, and his commitment to safety. 01:18:14.891 --> 01:18:16.891 - Charismatic. 01:18:21.730 --> 01:18:23.731 - Words. 01:18:23.733 --> 01:18:27.401 - Sarah, to you, back to you. 01:18:27.403 --> 01:18:31.205 - Thanks for watching, I'm Sarah Saunders. 01:18:31.207 --> 01:18:33.741 - Now you're doing my lines. 01:18:33.743 --> 01:18:35.776 - And this is Robert Richards. 01:18:35.778 --> 01:18:39.380 - Now you're, no, no... 01:18:39.382 --> 01:18:41.749 - Stay tuned for the new hit show Britney's world. 01:18:41.751 --> 01:18:44.785 - I feel like you're staring at me. 01:18:44.787 --> 01:18:45.986 I feel like you're staring at me, 01:18:45.988 --> 01:18:48.122 I'm not gonna stand for that, ok? 01:18:48.124 --> 01:18:50.725 - I'm not a showman, I'm not here to entertain you. 01:18:50.727 --> 01:18:52.860 - Oh, that went well. 01:18:52.862 --> 01:18:55.463 This was great. Really. 01:18:55.465 --> 01:18:57.898 Get your penis out of my face. 01:19:07.809 --> 01:19:10.111 - Next on Britney's world, 01:19:10.113 --> 01:19:14.014 Britney tackles your questions on healthcare. 01:19:14.016 --> 01:19:16.951 - I don't understand the whole thing about Obamacare. 01:19:16.953 --> 01:19:18.385 Just use a condom. 01:19:18.387 --> 01:19:19.854 - The economy. 01:19:19.856 --> 01:19:22.790 - How can we make the economy better? 01:19:22.792 --> 01:19:24.492 Just buy stuff. 01:19:24.494 --> 01:19:26.360 - The middle east.