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WEBVTT 1 00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:09.041 Globodyne is a consolidator of media properties. 2 00:01:09.209 --> 00:01:12.853 Globodyne is a consolidator of media properties. Consolidator. Oh, no! 3 00:01:15.930 --> 00:01:18.866 Globodyne's a consolidator of media properties and data retrieval... 4 00:01:19.036 --> 00:01:21.076 ...with a focus in fiber-optic content provision. 5 00:01:21.244 --> 00:01:22.903 It's basically a synergy of Web-based... 6 00:01:23.068 --> 00:01:26.233 ...and platform-based UNIX-driven delivery systems. 7 00:01:26.397 --> 00:01:28.340 Okay, I made that last part up. 8 00:01:30.431 --> 00:01:33.017 We spent months on this trip. I just assumed... 9 00:01:33.184 --> 00:01:35.640 ...that you knew you needed a passport to get into Russia. 10 00:01:37.473 --> 00:01:41.467 But if I should have told you, then I'm really sorry, Mr. Fairbanks. 11 00:01:45.794 --> 00:01:48.730 It's not my fault airport security strip-searched you, Mr. Fairbanks. 12 00:01:50.404 --> 00:01:53.155 I mean, maybe you shouldn't have made that joke. You know? 13 00:01:53.317 --> 00:01:54.561 Hon? Fire. 14 00:01:54.725 --> 00:01:57.890 You know what, I'm gonna load you up with drink coupons. 15 00:01:59.335 --> 00:02:02.183 Blanca? Can you make this little man something to eat? 16 00:02:13.195 --> 00:02:14.471 Are you sure about this? 17 00:02:14.636 --> 00:02:17.092 The trainer said it's just a minor annoyance. 18 00:02:17.260 --> 00:02:20.393 He said it just reminds him to be a little less vocal. 19 00:02:59.001 --> 00:03:01.522 - Hey, Dick. - Morning, Joe. 20 00:03:02.969 --> 00:03:04.180 That a new car? 21 00:03:04.633 --> 00:03:06.161 It's the new Mercedes S500. 22 00:03:06.331 --> 00:03:08.568 You can only special-order these from Germany. 23 00:03:09.691 --> 00:03:12.212 - How's it run? - Well, it's a Mercedes. 24 00:03:13.980 --> 00:03:15.290 Check this out. 25 00:03:15.517 --> 00:03:16.859 Mercedes, on. 26 00:03:20.543 --> 00:03:22.005 Yeah? Well, watch this. 27 00:03:22.174 --> 00:03:24.893 Beemer, sit. Stay. 28 00:03:25.055 --> 00:03:27.609 Play dead. Good boy. 29 00:03:28.192 --> 00:03:30.713 That's cute, Dick. Mercedes, off. 30 00:03:56.136 --> 00:03:58.559 "It has come to our attention that certain departments... 31 00:03:58.729 --> 00:04:01.632 ...have begun to run into situations." Situations. 32 00:04:01.802 --> 00:04:03.843 The big boys want to see you upstairs. 33 00:04:04.682 --> 00:04:06.113 Which floor? Twentieth? 34 00:04:06.923 --> 00:04:07.907 Twenty-sixth? 35 00:04:08.845 --> 00:04:10.022 Thirty-second? 36 00:04:11.085 --> 00:04:13.322 - Not the 51st? - Yes. 37 00:04:14.862 --> 00:04:16.389 Congratulations, Mr. Harper. 38 00:04:19.247 --> 00:04:21.070 - Go ahead and wrap this up. - Okay. 39 00:04:21.232 --> 00:04:22.378 - How do I look? - Great. 40 00:04:22.544 --> 00:04:24.333 - Anything in my teeth? - No. 41 00:04:24.497 --> 00:04:26.286 I need a paper bag. 42 00:04:30.739 --> 00:04:33.969 - Hey, Oz. - Hey, Dick. Morning. 43 00:04:34.132 --> 00:04:36.554 It is, isn't it? Sure is. 44 00:04:36.724 --> 00:04:38.285 - Yeah. - Yeah. 45 00:04:38.804 --> 00:04:41.042 Hey, did you... ? Did you hear about Bill? 46 00:04:41.911 --> 00:04:45.358 - Oh, yeah. That's.... That's wild. - Yeah. 47 00:04:46.391 --> 00:04:50.287 Yeah. I wonder.... I wonder who's gonna take his place. 48 00:04:51.801 --> 00:04:53.973 That's the big mystery. 49 00:04:54.138 --> 00:04:55.993 Yeah. Yeah. 50 00:04:58.684 --> 00:05:01.499 - You getting off? - Not this time, Oz. 51 00:05:01.915 --> 00:05:03.804 Son of a bitch! 52 00:05:59.820 --> 00:06:01.282 That's it. 53 00:06:06.670 --> 00:06:08.908 Hello. I'm... 54 00:06:10.480 --> 00:06:13.295 ...Dick Harper, and I'm here to see Jack McAllister. 55 00:06:13.520 --> 00:06:17.351 Oh, well, that's him now, sorry. He had to step out. 56 00:06:20.307 --> 00:06:21.616 Dick. 57 00:06:22.163 --> 00:06:24.400 Damn glad to finally see you up here. 58 00:06:26.228 --> 00:06:28.466 Hey, man. 59 00:06:31.445 --> 00:06:33.901 - Frank Bascombe, CFO. - Nice to meet you, Frank. 60 00:06:34.070 --> 00:06:36.340 Nice to meet you. Listen, Dick. Dick. 61 00:06:36.503 --> 00:06:39.570 Jack's very sorry that he couldn't be here to congratulate you. 62 00:06:39.736 --> 00:06:43.151 Well, on becoming the new VP of Communication. 63 00:06:43.705 --> 00:06:45.462 Are you--? 64 00:06:45.882 --> 00:06:48.021 - Holy.... Thank you. - No, no, no. 65 00:06:48.187 --> 00:06:50.740 But also, he wanted to invite you to his house... 66 00:06:50.907 --> 00:06:53.810 ...for an orientation meeting on Monday morning. 67 00:07:00.158 --> 00:07:02.230 Dick? Ann's got the address. 68 00:07:02.398 --> 00:07:06.011 All right. Sure, I'll get that. Okay. Ann? 69 00:07:06.175 --> 00:07:07.518 - Thanks. - Sure. 70 00:07:07.679 --> 00:07:09.371 And thank you... 71 00:07:10.561 --> 00:07:11.771 ...Frank. 72 00:07:14.530 --> 00:07:16.090 Cool exit. 73 00:07:16.803 --> 00:07:18.428 How do you like your eggs? 74 00:07:20.483 --> 00:07:22.273 Pardon me! 75 00:07:30.759 --> 00:07:34.502 Ours is an age of unmeasured prosperity, 76 00:07:34.663 --> 00:07:36.158 Oh, yeah. 77 00:07:36.329 --> 00:07:37.506 - You know what? - What? 78 00:07:37.672 --> 00:07:39.364 You should quit your job. 79 00:07:39.689 --> 00:07:41.414 - Quit my job? - Yeah. 80 00:07:41.738 --> 00:07:44.936 Do you even know what you're getting paid? I mean, I can't quit my job. 81 00:07:45.099 --> 00:07:47.270 Well, not specifically, but.... 82 00:07:47.787 --> 00:07:51.334 Bob got VP last month, he's making 1 50 plus bonuses. 83 00:07:51.756 --> 00:07:54.310 Come on, you wanna spend more time with Billy. 84 00:07:54.476 --> 00:07:56.550 Do it. Just-- Come on. 85 00:07:56.717 --> 00:07:58.857 Do it. Do it. Quit your job. 86 00:07:59.086 --> 00:08:00.713 We must never become a winner-take-all society, 87 00:08:00.880 --> 00:08:03.247 - You know what we should do? - What? 88 00:08:04.464 --> 00:08:06.439 We should have sex... 89 00:08:06.960 --> 00:08:08.749 ...on Saturday. 90 00:08:08.914 --> 00:08:10.026 I'll buy candles. 91 00:08:10.194 --> 00:08:13.260 I'll pick up the new Starbucks sampler featuring Sade. 92 00:08:13.427 --> 00:08:17.105 Oh, you animal. That is gonna be so wild. 93 00:08:17.269 --> 00:08:18.611 Yeah. 94 00:08:32.664 --> 00:08:33.843 Thank you. 95 00:08:35.258 --> 00:08:37.680 Just make yourself at home. 96 00:08:38.235 --> 00:08:39.347 Right. 97 00:08:50.398 --> 00:08:51.608 Dick. 98 00:08:51.774 --> 00:08:53.847 Yeah. Mr. McAllister. 99 00:08:54.719 --> 00:08:57.786 - Dick. Hey, call me Jack. - Likewise. 100 00:08:59.200 --> 00:09:02.268 With my name. Dick, I mean. 101 00:09:02.433 --> 00:09:04.375 Man. Dick Harper. 102 00:09:04.546 --> 00:09:06.007 Dick Harper. 103 00:09:06.178 --> 00:09:10.238 Dick Harper playing the harp. Harpo Marx playing the jew's-harp. 104 00:09:10.659 --> 00:09:13.049 D.H. DH. 105 00:09:13.379 --> 00:09:15.071 You're my designated hitter. 106 00:09:15.237 --> 00:09:17.246 I need you to step up into the batter's box... 107 00:09:17.413 --> 00:09:19.323 ...and knock one out of the ballpark for me. 108 00:09:19.494 --> 00:09:21.119 - Gone. - You ever have a nickname? 109 00:09:21.927 --> 00:09:23.837 Well, it was.... 110 00:09:24.488 --> 00:09:26.245 Squirt. The Squirt. 111 00:09:26.408 --> 00:09:29.257 Something about how I was conceived, I don't know. 112 00:09:29.865 --> 00:09:32.735 We gonna think of something. Have trouble finding the place? 113 00:09:32.906 --> 00:09:37.031 No, sir. By the way, what a absolutely beautiful hou-- Home you have. 114 00:09:37.195 --> 00:09:38.984 So then my lawyer says to her lawyer: 115 00:09:39.147 --> 00:09:41.897 "lf she thinks she's getting that yacht, she's a little dingy." 116 00:09:44.269 --> 00:09:46.026 He always-- He loves that one. 117 00:09:47.150 --> 00:09:48.841 The point is that we need somebody... 118 00:09:49.006 --> 00:09:51.014 ...who projects confidence in this position. 119 00:09:51.183 --> 00:09:52.710 We've seen how you handle yourself. 120 00:09:52.880 --> 00:09:55.215 You've been a great cheerleader for this company. 121 00:09:55.377 --> 00:09:56.838 So we were thinking that.... 122 00:09:57.617 --> 00:10:00.433 - Well, you go ahead and tell him. - No, you go ahead. 123 00:10:02.675 --> 00:10:06.701 What's up, guys? Come on. Don't hold out on me here. What? 124 00:10:06.868 --> 00:10:09.072 We want you to go on MoneyLife this afternoon... 125 00:10:09.237 --> 00:10:11.375 ...and announce our quarterly projections. 126 00:10:14.038 --> 00:10:16.177 You're the guy. You're the guy we have faith in. 127 00:10:16.343 --> 00:10:18.286 You can get our positive spin out there. 128 00:10:19.320 --> 00:10:21.776 Right. Positive spin. 129 00:10:21.945 --> 00:10:23.832 These are fickle times, Dick. 130 00:10:24.473 --> 00:10:26.547 We need to stick together as a team. 131 00:10:27.417 --> 00:10:30.003 Like my daddy always used to say.... 132 00:10:37.501 --> 00:10:39.224 Well, you can count on me, sir. 133 00:10:39.389 --> 00:10:41.659 I mean, I can't tell you how happy I am. 134 00:10:43.902 --> 00:10:46.008 - Thank you. - How were those eggs Florentine? 135 00:10:46.366 --> 00:10:48.669 - Best I've ever had. - Good answer. 136 00:10:53.313 --> 00:10:54.458 I'm on the plane right now! 137 00:10:54.626 --> 00:10:57.310 Do you know what's sitting in front of me? Do you know? 138 00:10:57.474 --> 00:11:00.378 A kosher meal! A kosher meal! 139 00:11:00.547 --> 00:11:03.745 How many times do I need to tell you? ! I don't need a kosher meal! 140 00:11:03.908 --> 00:11:05.185 I'm Episcopalian! 141 00:11:05.349 --> 00:11:08.862 No-- No, you, miss-- You-- No, you grow up! 142 00:11:09.477 --> 00:11:10.787 For-- No, you, miss-- 143 00:11:10.950 --> 00:11:13.985 Phyllis, can I... ? Can I talk to you for a minute? 144 00:11:14.151 --> 00:11:16.356 - Here's a yell! - It's personal. 145 00:11:17.607 --> 00:11:20.837 - Never actually had makeup on. - I'm happy for you. 146 00:11:21.449 --> 00:11:23.588 - Hi. - Hi. 147 00:11:24.170 --> 00:11:26.472 - Where's Sam? - Washington. 148 00:11:26.731 --> 00:11:29.153 These are your talking points. They were just faxed over. 149 00:11:29.324 --> 00:11:31.212 And Sam is on the line for you. 150 00:11:31.788 --> 00:11:32.803 Hello, Mr, Harper, 151 00:11:32.973 --> 00:11:36.269 Hey, Sam. How you doing? Nice talking to you. 152 00:11:36.430 --> 00:11:38.602 I thought you were gonna be here. 153 00:11:38.767 --> 00:11:40.939 - Me too, I hear it's beautiful there, - That's the thing-- 154 00:11:41.103 --> 00:11:43.012 - Okay, Dick, we're on in five, - Yep, sure. 155 00:11:43.184 --> 00:11:45.224 - -three, two.... 156 00:11:53.618 --> 00:11:56.882 Today we're talking with the new VP of Communications at Globodyne... 157 00:11:57.044 --> 00:11:59.084 ... Dick Harper, How you doing, Dick? 158 00:11:59.252 --> 00:12:01.194 Just terrific, Sam. Thank you for asking. 159 00:12:01.365 --> 00:12:03.372 And so is Globodyne, by the way. 160 00:12:04.246 --> 00:12:07.411 Now, Dick, tell me, what is the shareholder to make... 161 00:12:07.575 --> 00:12:10.575 ...of the fact that Jack McAllister, your CEO... 162 00:12:10.744 --> 00:12:13.559 ...has unloaded a considerable share of his stocks? 163 00:12:16.569 --> 00:12:21.623 I think CEOs sell their stocks for many reasons, Sam. 164 00:12:22.171 --> 00:12:24.059 Both professional and personal. 165 00:12:24.219 --> 00:12:27.602 Actually, over the past year, Jack McAllister has sold 80 percent... 166 00:12:27.772 --> 00:12:29.561 ...of his holdings through shell companies, 167 00:12:29.724 --> 00:12:32.540 Now, how do you explain that? 168 00:12:35.263 --> 00:12:37.467 The reasons for doing something like that would be-- 169 00:12:37.632 --> 00:12:40.414 Losing you there. Hold on. 170 00:12:40.577 --> 00:12:43.708 The reasons for doing something like that would be.... Could be many. 171 00:12:45.410 --> 00:12:46.522 Both.... 172 00:12:49.154 --> 00:12:52.123 There's also talk of some of the Globodyne portfolio documents... 173 00:12:52.292 --> 00:12:53.306 ... being subpoenaed, 174 00:12:53.475 --> 00:12:57.503 Specifically those of your CFO, Frank Bascombe, 175 00:12:59.110 --> 00:13:02.144 Now, joining us with his insights, is presidential hopeful Ralph Nader, 176 00:13:03.559 --> 00:13:04.868 Really? 177 00:13:05.543 --> 00:13:08.894 Hi, Ralph. Big fan, love your stuff. 178 00:13:09.064 --> 00:13:11.880 I wish I could say the same, I don't know how you sleep at night, 179 00:13:13.706 --> 00:13:16.740 Corporations like Globodyne pervert the American dream, 180 00:13:16.907 --> 00:13:18.019 The super-rich get richer, 181 00:13:19.531 --> 00:13:20.612 You are a disgrace, 182 00:13:22.508 --> 00:13:24.930 Ralph, I don't know where you're getting your statistics. 183 00:13:25.261 --> 00:13:28.262 I can only say that, in my estimation, Globodyne is transparent. 184 00:13:32.111 --> 00:13:34.697 We'd be more than willing to share any and all documentation. 185 00:13:37.681 --> 00:13:39.055 What is going on? 186 00:13:39.217 --> 00:13:41.584 Can somebody tell me what the heck is--? 187 00:13:43.506 --> 00:13:45.896 Hey, there's a fi-- Somebody should-- 188 00:13:46.290 --> 00:13:47.753 Okay. 189 00:13:48.788 --> 00:13:50.381 This can't be good. 190 00:13:50.964 --> 00:13:52.558 Out of my way! 191 00:13:52.725 --> 00:13:54.798 - Hey, that's my ficus! - My ficus! 192 00:13:54.966 --> 00:13:58.796 You're not even from this floor! Help! Security! 193 00:14:04.088 --> 00:14:05.135 What's going on? 194 00:14:05.304 --> 00:14:09.135 Oh, so Dick finally wants to know what's going on. 195 00:14:10.586 --> 00:14:11.797 Frank? 196 00:14:13.786 --> 00:14:16.406 Methinks somebody made a boo-boo. 197 00:14:16.572 --> 00:14:19.354 Maybe we didn't know how to use Quicken. Yeah, that could be it. 198 00:14:19.869 --> 00:14:23.515 Frank. Frank. Try to focus. Okay? What's happening to Globodyne? 199 00:14:23.678 --> 00:14:26.842 - Globodyne? - Yeah, what happened, Frank? 200 00:14:27.006 --> 00:14:31.198 - We took our shifting losses... - Yeah? 201 00:14:31.552 --> 00:14:34.815 - ... and we put them into businesses... - Yeah, yeah? 202 00:14:35.233 --> 00:14:37.438 ...that we actually owned. 203 00:14:37.602 --> 00:14:39.325 And then the balance sheet... 204 00:14:39.490 --> 00:14:41.596 ...it showed profit. 205 00:14:41.763 --> 00:14:43.968 But actually, there was... 206 00:14:45.253 --> 00:14:46.332 ...debt. 207 00:14:46.500 --> 00:14:47.930 What the hell? ! 208 00:14:49.190 --> 00:14:50.716 You're sick. 209 00:14:51.590 --> 00:14:53.630 - I want you to hit me. - Frank, let go of me now. 210 00:14:53.798 --> 00:14:55.904 - I want you to hit me. - Let go, you're scaring me. 211 00:14:56.071 --> 00:14:58.406 - Hit me. - Frank! Get off! 212 00:14:58.761 --> 00:15:02.591 And I have the 6000 greatest partners a man could ask for, 213 00:15:10.411 --> 00:15:11.590 Mr. McAllister? 214 00:15:11.755 --> 00:15:13.185 I don't know what to tell you. 215 00:15:13.357 --> 00:15:17.186 We're just a cell in a much larger organism called the global economy. 216 00:15:17.358 --> 00:15:21.385 Weak companies have to die so that stronger companies can get stronger. 217 00:15:21.551 --> 00:15:24.104 - It's just nature. - Nature? What? 218 00:15:24.271 --> 00:15:26.541 You ever read Walden Pond? It's all in there. 219 00:15:26.704 --> 00:15:28.494 Hey, you send him a copy of the tape. 220 00:15:28.657 --> 00:15:30.480 What about the other employees, sir? 221 00:15:30.642 --> 00:15:32.366 They're gonna be fine. Don't go there. 222 00:15:32.529 --> 00:15:35.018 This is America, the land of opportunity. 223 00:15:36.242 --> 00:15:40.848 I don't know, sir. With all due respect, this doesn't feel right. 224 00:15:41.012 --> 00:15:45.324 Step away from the rotors now, boy. They gonna chop your head clean off. 225 00:16:11.741 --> 00:16:13.652 Honey? I'm home. 226 00:16:14.589 --> 00:16:17.110 Oh, and the vice president is home! 227 00:16:22.400 --> 00:16:24.124 I see you got them digging the hot tub. 228 00:16:24.288 --> 00:16:27.136 I know. Yes, I called the guy. They came right out. 229 00:16:28.737 --> 00:16:32.765 - That almost never happens. - I know. We're so lucky. 230 00:16:36.227 --> 00:16:37.756 Dinner's ready! 231 00:16:43.622 --> 00:16:46.591 - Look at it! - Oh, my gosh! 232 00:16:46.759 --> 00:16:49.695 Look! I did it and it's perfect! 233 00:16:49.864 --> 00:16:53.695 My gosh! That could feed a family of four. 234 00:16:54.218 --> 00:16:57.730 I mean.... I-- In my-- Look at that, Billy. 235 00:16:57.962 --> 00:17:00.418 I'm surprised you left off the hooves. 236 00:17:01.899 --> 00:17:05.795 You know, before we get into that, I have some wonderful news. 237 00:17:05.965 --> 00:17:07.820 Mama quit her job! 238 00:17:11.086 --> 00:17:12.875 - I did. I did, I did! - You did? 239 00:17:13.039 --> 00:17:15.888 - Isn't that great? - My gosh! That's incredible! 240 00:17:16.048 --> 00:17:19.309 Oh, the timing of it, it was just beautiful, Dick. And, oh, thank you. 241 00:17:19.472 --> 00:17:21.000 I just-- I just did it! 242 00:17:21.169 --> 00:17:23.723 No. Oh, boy. 243 00:17:23.889 --> 00:17:25.167 And now, you know what... 244 00:17:25.331 --> 00:17:27.721 ...I can spend so much more time with my beautiful boy. 245 00:17:27.892 --> 00:17:31.470 - Yeah. - Now, what's your news, big Mr. VP? 246 00:17:31.636 --> 00:17:35.827 I have something of an announcement to make. 247 00:17:36.085 --> 00:17:41.619 It turns out that a very wonderful opportunity has just presented itself... 248 00:17:41.943 --> 00:17:44.563 ...in the form of me... 249 00:17:44.856 --> 00:17:48.119 ...not necessarily working at Globodyne anymore. 250 00:17:50.969 --> 00:17:52.464 Were you fired? 251 00:17:52.633 --> 00:17:54.423 I wasn't fired. Globodyne tanked. 252 00:17:54.875 --> 00:17:56.086 - Dick! - Jeez. "Fired." 253 00:17:56.251 --> 00:17:58.871 What do you mean? How could that happen? 254 00:17:59.100 --> 00:18:02.002 They just gave you a promotion. And-- 255 00:18:02.300 --> 00:18:04.789 There is nothing to worry about. I'll get my severance... 256 00:18:04.958 --> 00:18:06.966 ...money from my pension. We're fine. 257 00:18:07.263 --> 00:18:10.646 I am a winner. Billy, tell your father he's a winner. 258 00:18:14.816 --> 00:18:16.191 See? 259 00:18:25.444 --> 00:18:28.705 - Hey! Our first day at home together. - Hey. 260 00:18:29.188 --> 00:18:31.197 Let's have a big family breakfast. 261 00:18:31.365 --> 00:18:33.470 Oh, gosh, honey, Billy's already gone to school... 262 00:18:33.638 --> 00:18:36.224 ...and I gotta meet him for that Mommy & Me lunch thing. 263 00:18:36.391 --> 00:18:38.847 What are you gonna do? Are you gonna look for a job? 264 00:18:39.495 --> 00:18:42.562 You know what, I think I might just take this day. 265 00:18:42.728 --> 00:18:45.379 Great. I do. I think you should. 266 00:18:45.545 --> 00:18:48.360 But, listen, I gotta go pick up that thing at the thing. 267 00:18:49.738 --> 00:18:52.041 Baby, I gotta go. I'm sorry. Sorry. 268 00:18:52.204 --> 00:18:53.578 Okay, good. 269 00:18:53.965 --> 00:18:56.486 I'll see you later, baby. Have a really good time. 270 00:18:56.653 --> 00:18:57.897 Bye. 271 00:19:33.110 --> 00:19:34.322 Okay. 272 00:19:47.675 --> 00:19:49.083 Cheers. 273 00:19:49.372 --> 00:19:51.446 Former CFO Frank Bascombe has been indicted... 274 00:19:51.613 --> 00:19:54.231 ...on charges of fraud and money laundering, 275 00:19:54.397 --> 00:19:57.180 Lead investigators say all roads lead to Mr, Bascombe, 276 00:19:57.343 --> 00:19:58.554 And no evidence has yet... 277 00:19:58.719 --> 00:20:02.266 ...to link former CEO Jack McAllister to this growing scandal, 278 00:20:02.720 --> 00:20:05.109 We've all had to make sacrifices, 279 00:20:06.081 --> 00:20:09.115 I sold my place in Jackson Ho-- No, 280 00:20:09.282 --> 00:20:11.966 - Martha 's Vineyard, - Oh, shut up! 281 00:20:14.531 --> 00:20:15.808 God. 282 00:20:17.701 --> 00:20:22.720 Hey, bud. Hey, hey, hey. Can't be that bad, can it, bud? 283 00:20:31.881 --> 00:20:33.256 God! 284 00:20:36.522 --> 00:20:37.667 Oh, you know it. 285 00:20:38.378 --> 00:20:41.129 So can I send you a résumé? 286 00:20:41.451 --> 00:20:44.169 No, I got a terrific one here. You'll love it. 287 00:20:44.332 --> 00:20:46.154 Do you have a fax number? 288 00:20:47.468 --> 00:20:51.464 So there are no new openings at this time. Right. 289 00:20:51.630 --> 00:20:53.736 And what about the near future? 290 00:20:55.472 --> 00:20:58.821 Yeah. Sure. I could stop calling. 291 00:20:59.312 --> 00:21:00.458 This afternoon. Okay. 292 00:21:02.001 --> 00:21:03.790 I'll be there. Bye. 293 00:21:06.578 --> 00:21:09.513 Hon. I got an interview at Pyramid Tech. 294 00:21:11.027 --> 00:21:13.613 I was really starting to wonder there. 295 00:21:30.681 --> 00:21:31.860 Hey! 296 00:21:32.250 --> 00:21:33.330 Hold on! 297 00:21:45.630 --> 00:21:47.004 - Dick. - Oz. 298 00:22:43.983 --> 00:22:45.739 Wanna go get a drink? 299 00:22:45.903 --> 00:22:48.043 - You buying? - Sure. 300 00:22:48.847 --> 00:22:50.506 - Harper? - Yeah. 301 00:22:50.832 --> 00:22:52.905 - Dick Harper! - Yeah. 302 00:22:53.073 --> 00:22:57.002 You don't have to stand in this line. Come on with me. 303 00:22:58.195 --> 00:23:00.235 Hey, Oz. Rain check. 304 00:23:01.011 --> 00:23:02.800 Son of a bitch! 305 00:23:04.788 --> 00:23:06.796 Okay, rip it out. Get it on the truck. 306 00:23:07.093 --> 00:23:09.941 Hector, what's going on? What--? 307 00:23:10.102 --> 00:23:12.405 - What happened? - Your check go bouncy-bounce. 308 00:23:12.599 --> 00:23:15.186 But it's okay, I heard what happened to your husband. 309 00:23:15.351 --> 00:23:17.686 Not everybody could afford landscaping like this, eh? 310 00:23:17.848 --> 00:23:20.915 - Hector, please. - I am sorry, Miss Jane. 311 00:23:21.081 --> 00:23:25.392 Oh, no, no, no. No! No, no! 312 00:23:25.627 --> 00:23:28.628 This is all-- Everything, it's all wrong. 313 00:23:28.795 --> 00:23:30.683 I want this out. Roll it all up. 314 00:23:30.844 --> 00:23:33.780 I ordered Kentucky bluegrass. 315 00:23:33.949 --> 00:23:36.568 This is green. 316 00:23:36.830 --> 00:23:40.474 - Dick Harper! What a stroke of luck. - Oh, jeez. 317 00:23:43.135 --> 00:23:46.333 I'm sorry, I don't remember where you know me from. 318 00:23:46.496 --> 00:23:48.057 Oh, I don't know you. 319 00:23:48.225 --> 00:23:52.252 I just saw you spaz out MoneyLife. Oh, my God, that was great. 320 00:23:52.418 --> 00:23:54.491 Hey, some of the fellas would like to meet you. 321 00:23:54.658 --> 00:23:57.179 - Hello, Dick. - I can't believe it's really you. 322 00:23:57.348 --> 00:24:00.731 - Oh, my God, it's him. - Did you bring your statistics? 323 00:24:01.861 --> 00:24:04.677 We have an expression around here when someone makes a mistake. 324 00:24:04.838 --> 00:24:06.399 It's called "pulling a Dick." 325 00:24:06.566 --> 00:24:07.876 Up high, up high. 326 00:24:08.166 --> 00:24:10.339 Have you seen DickHarperIsATool. com? 327 00:24:10.503 --> 00:24:12.512 Oh, you're gonna love this. This is dynamite. 328 00:24:12.680 --> 00:24:15.779 I don't know where you're getting your statistics, 329 00:24:17.417 --> 00:24:19.785 Who is that? Who is that? It's you! It's you! 330 00:24:19.946 --> 00:24:22.281 Can we just get on with the job interview? 331 00:24:22.443 --> 00:24:23.555 This guy! 332 00:24:23.723 --> 00:24:27.073 We couldn't hire you! We just wanna take your picture. 333 00:24:27.244 --> 00:24:30.594 Okay, everybody, little bit closer. One, two, three. 334 00:24:30.766 --> 00:24:31.846 Statistics! 335 00:24:37.070 --> 00:24:39.079 Hey, how'd it go? 336 00:24:39.247 --> 00:24:41.005 Oh, not too bad. 337 00:24:41.936 --> 00:24:43.628 It was good practice. 338 00:24:45.426 --> 00:24:48.296 - What are you doing? - Going through our finances. 339 00:24:48.467 --> 00:24:49.579 I'm not sure... 340 00:24:49.746 --> 00:24:53.195 ...but it seems that we may be in a little bit of a pickle, Dick. 341 00:24:53.364 --> 00:24:57.162 Well, sure, our financial bounce-back has taken a bit longer than expected... 342 00:24:57.333 --> 00:24:59.570 ...but, you know, that's natural. 343 00:24:59.734 --> 00:25:03.150 Our lawn was repossessed today. I didn't even know they could do that. 344 00:25:03.318 --> 00:25:07.598 I think maybe it's time you start thinking about accepting something... 345 00:25:07.768 --> 00:25:10.071 ...a little bit lower than a vice-presidency. 346 00:25:10.233 --> 00:25:13.200 No. Took me 15 years to get a VP-ship. If I step back now... 347 00:25:13.370 --> 00:25:14.963 ...I'll lose everything I worked for. 348 00:25:15.130 --> 00:25:17.585 We're just gonna have to suck it up for a couple months. 349 00:25:17.754 --> 00:25:20.505 In a couple of months, we'll be declaring bankruptcy. 350 00:25:20.668 --> 00:25:23.287 - Oh, come on. - Our savings-- 351 00:25:23.452 --> 00:25:26.966 Look. Our savings was in Globodyne stock. 352 00:25:27.134 --> 00:25:30.549 Jesus. And, look, our pension was in Globodyne stock. 353 00:25:30.719 --> 00:25:34.167 Everything was in Globodyne stock! All of it! 354 00:25:34.399 --> 00:25:37.849 The lawn is covered with dirt! It is so much fun! 355 00:25:38.016 --> 00:25:40.089 I have made a mud man! 356 00:25:41.505 --> 00:25:43.677 Now, Billy is looking at the glass half full. 357 00:25:44.451 --> 00:25:47.681 Hon, relax. We've got 600 grand. 358 00:25:48.004 --> 00:25:50.907 - Where? - We're standing in it. Our house. 359 00:25:51.941 --> 00:25:55.870 Since Globodyne, the local property market crashed, Dick. 360 00:25:56.038 --> 00:26:01.604 If we sold our house today, we would owe the bank 150 grand. 361 00:26:04.039 --> 00:26:06.374 I knew it. It was churning in my gut... 362 00:26:06.537 --> 00:26:08.479 - ... and I didn't listen. - It would be okay. 363 00:26:08.649 --> 00:26:11.846 You said we could afford this house and take out a second mortgage... 364 00:26:12.011 --> 00:26:14.401 ...so that we could put in the pool, redo the kitchen... 365 00:26:14.571 --> 00:26:16.644 - I said that. - ... and now we are on the verge... 366 00:26:16.813 --> 00:26:18.885 ...of losing the house. If we lose the house... 367 00:26:19.052 --> 00:26:23.177 ...then Billy loses all sense of security and later, never have a relationship... 368 00:26:23.342 --> 00:26:25.415 ...so he'll just spend his whole life just alone. 369 00:26:25.582 --> 00:26:28.845 There he'll be, just alone, nobody with him, just like a bum. 370 00:26:29.007 --> 00:26:31.975 Hon? Hon? You need a paper bag? 371 00:26:32.977 --> 00:26:35.247 You said everything was gonna be okay. 372 00:26:39.986 --> 00:26:44.395 Mr. Dick! Something wrong with the electricity! 373 00:26:45.877 --> 00:26:49.806 Well, if you're gonna do it, be the best. 374 00:26:53.558 --> 00:26:58.000 Hi, I'm Lucy, and I'll be your Kostmart training team leader. 375 00:26:58.167 --> 00:27:00.339 I am so happy to welcome you to the Kostmart team. 376 00:27:00.504 --> 00:27:02.480 Now, we work hard here, but we play hard also. 377 00:27:02.649 --> 00:27:04.504 I think we're gonna have a good time here... 378 00:27:04.666 --> 00:27:07.928 ...because at Kostmart, we're more than a store. We're family. 379 00:27:08.923 --> 00:27:10.680 Now, before we get started... 380 00:27:10.844 --> 00:27:13.266 ...I am gonna need you all to piss in one of these cups. 381 00:27:23.103 --> 00:27:26.748 - It's taking a little while. - Just relax. 382 00:27:26.912 --> 00:27:29.848 I've been married for 20 years. I know what it looks like. 383 00:27:30.081 --> 00:27:32.416 You want me to get you a cola? 384 00:27:32.834 --> 00:27:35.902 It's just hard to do while you're standing there watching. 385 00:27:36.067 --> 00:27:38.751 I could sell you my pee for $100. 386 00:27:38.915 --> 00:27:41.786 I been off the pipe for two years. Thank you, Jesus. 387 00:27:41.956 --> 00:27:47.076 Unfortunately, we don't have any positions available in Pilates or yoga. 388 00:27:47.493 --> 00:27:50.723 But we are looking for a Jeet Kun Do instructor. 389 00:27:50.886 --> 00:27:53.986 Yes. I mean, that's-- Oh, my-- I thought-- 390 00:27:54.152 --> 00:27:56.487 I didn't even-- I didn't say that? 391 00:27:56.649 --> 00:27:58.787 I was born doing... 392 00:27:59.466 --> 00:28:00.775 ...that. 393 00:28:01.066 --> 00:28:03.936 - Hi, welcome to Kostmart. - Watch. 394 00:28:04.651 --> 00:28:06.245 Hi! Welcome to Kostmart. 395 00:28:06.411 --> 00:28:09.958 Check out our makeup counter on aisle 12B. 396 00:28:10.604 --> 00:28:15.112 Welcome to Kostmart. Check out our CDs. Garth Brooks on sale, aisle 51. 397 00:28:19.055 --> 00:28:22.602 Welcome to Kostmart. Your local gun emporium. 398 00:28:22.832 --> 00:28:25.069 Aisle 42, hunting gear. 399 00:28:25.713 --> 00:28:27.600 And the next thing I knew, I was wearing it. 400 00:28:28.531 --> 00:28:31.149 - Well, Jane. - Hey, Veronica. 401 00:28:31.314 --> 00:28:33.682 - Hi, how are you? - Good, good. 402 00:28:33.843 --> 00:28:35.250 I didn't know you worked out here. 403 00:28:35.411 --> 00:28:39.187 Welcome to Kostmart. I hope you'll take a trip by the deli today... 404 00:28:39.348 --> 00:28:41.388 ...for a complimentary cube of jalapeño cheddar. 405 00:28:41.558 --> 00:28:45.006 I'm lactose intolerant. Where do you keep the cigarettes? 406 00:28:45.175 --> 00:28:47.063 Behind the counter. 407 00:28:47.224 --> 00:28:50.127 - But I'm not sure that's a good-- - Dick? You missed one. 408 00:28:51.000 --> 00:28:55.606 I'll get it. I'll get it. Wait. Ma'am? Ma'am. Welcome! 409 00:28:55.769 --> 00:28:57.843 Here we go. Hi. Hi. 410 00:28:59.162 --> 00:29:05.044 My name's Jane, and I'll be your instructor for beginners' Jin Ku Pow. 411 00:29:05.212 --> 00:29:08.344 So let's just get right into it. Here we go. 412 00:29:10.366 --> 00:29:12.254 We're just gonna loosen up a little bit. 413 00:29:12.414 --> 00:29:16.540 Here we go. Yeah. There we go. And ho. And hit. 414 00:29:16.703 --> 00:29:19.486 Excuse me! Ma'am! 415 00:29:24.353 --> 00:29:25.882 And jab. And jab. 416 00:29:29.443 --> 00:29:31.331 - Now I gotcha! - Get this! 417 00:29:33.349 --> 00:29:36.000 It's punch. And punch. And step. And kick! 418 00:29:38.950 --> 00:29:41.919 - It burns. - I saw you eyeballing me... 419 00:29:42.087 --> 00:29:44.192 ...when I came in. You were all up in my goodies. 420 00:29:48.424 --> 00:29:50.914 You know something? I'm glad you fired me. 421 00:29:51.081 --> 00:29:55.360 How's a person supposed to survive and feed their family on that salary? 422 00:29:59.916 --> 00:30:01.804 It's a lease. 423 00:30:07.310 --> 00:30:11.053 I don't know why we didn't think of this before. It's such a good idea. 424 00:30:11.215 --> 00:30:13.518 We're sorry we couldn't pay you. We have no money. 425 00:30:13.681 --> 00:30:16.169 It's okay. Your son is very important to me. 426 00:30:16.337 --> 00:30:19.021 I would do anything for him, Mr. Richard. 427 00:30:19.185 --> 00:30:22.896 In the meantime, thank you for letting us pay you in appliances. 428 00:30:23.058 --> 00:30:24.007 Yeah. 429 00:30:26.068 --> 00:30:27.595 Congratulations. 430 00:30:29.780 --> 00:30:30.893 Hey, think about this: 431 00:30:31.061 --> 00:30:34.095 How many places you'll see on one tank of gas. 432 00:30:36.599 --> 00:30:38.574 - You want me to drive? - Yeah. 433 00:30:57.149 --> 00:30:59.004 Here it is! 434 00:31:04.255 --> 00:31:07.638 We can live without it. People have lived without these things. 435 00:31:07.808 --> 00:31:10.743 - There goes the boxing match. - You can go to a bar. 436 00:31:10.913 --> 00:31:12.440 It's rigged anyway. 437 00:31:12.833 --> 00:31:16.283 What are you doing with the television? 438 00:31:19.779 --> 00:31:24.155 - You're going to sell it! - No, no. Billy! 439 00:31:24.324 --> 00:31:25.470 God! Just go, Dick! 440 00:31:25.637 --> 00:31:27.612 Damn it, Blanca, grab him! 441 00:31:29.638 --> 00:31:30.947 - Papa! Mama! - Go! Go, go! 442 00:31:31.110 --> 00:31:33.664 - Don't take my Telemundo! - Go! Go! Hurry, hurry! 443 00:31:33.831 --> 00:31:36.614 SpongeRoberto SquarePantalones! 444 00:31:36.776 --> 00:31:40.519 - God! Just go, go, go! - I want my MTV Latino. 445 00:31:49.772 --> 00:31:51.715 Dick, what are we gonna do? 446 00:31:52.748 --> 00:31:55.051 We've run out of things to sell. 447 00:31:57.294 --> 00:31:58.243 Well.... 448 00:32:00.495 --> 00:32:03.147 - There's always prostitution. - Dick. 449 00:32:04.241 --> 00:32:05.517 I mean me. 450 00:32:06.064 --> 00:32:08.105 We just gotta look for more work, that's all. 451 00:32:08.274 --> 00:32:12.977 There is no work, Dick. There's 6000 other people out of work. 452 00:32:13.138 --> 00:32:15.146 Vice presidents are working at Burger King. 453 00:32:15.315 --> 00:32:18.186 It's gonna be fine. All we need is $400... 454 00:32:18.356 --> 00:32:22.099 ...and we're good for another month. This is just temporary. So stay calm. 455 00:32:22.293 --> 00:32:24.203 - And don't panic! - Damn. 456 00:32:31.480 --> 00:32:34.547 Are you going to sit in the dirt hole all night long? 457 00:32:35.832 --> 00:32:38.135 - Come on, hon, let's get out. - Yeah. 458 00:32:38.298 --> 00:32:40.437 I'm starting to turn into a raisin anyway. 459 00:32:41.338 --> 00:32:44.056 What's the matter? You look sad, Richard. 460 00:32:44.540 --> 00:32:46.777 Blanca, call me Dick. 461 00:32:46.941 --> 00:32:50.455 Well, Blanca, there's just no jobs out there. 462 00:32:52.733 --> 00:32:56.696 I have a cousin who might be able to help you find some work. 463 00:32:56.863 --> 00:32:59.514 It's not much. But it's something. 464 00:33:19.717 --> 00:33:21.693 I need one guy who knows how to paint. 465 00:33:21.863 --> 00:33:23.041 That's me! 466 00:33:24.295 --> 00:33:26.915 Hold on, I got it. I got it. I'm here! 467 00:33:27.080 --> 00:33:28.672 Hey, I was here first! 468 00:33:34.026 --> 00:33:36.842 Congratulations, güero. You almost got that one. 469 00:33:39.852 --> 00:33:42.090 Don't worry. There'll be more. 470 00:33:43.437 --> 00:33:46.253 That thing is already starting to swell up like a balloon. 471 00:33:46.414 --> 00:33:47.461 Is it noticeable? 472 00:33:47.630 --> 00:33:49.060 - No. - Just a little bit. 473 00:33:49.231 --> 00:33:52.231 Did you see that? We should report that guy. 474 00:33:54.544 --> 00:33:55.973 Report him! 475 00:33:56.561 --> 00:33:58.634 - We should report him. - Let's report him. 476 00:33:58.802 --> 00:34:00.143 I do it for you. 477 00:34:00.401 --> 00:34:03.632 This is a new drug in the same family of Botox. 478 00:34:03.795 --> 00:34:05.584 We don't expect any problems. 479 00:34:05.747 --> 00:34:08.465 Your check for $14 is waiting for you at the front desk... 480 00:34:08.628 --> 00:34:13.266 ...and we think you are all going to look beautiful. Okay. 481 00:34:13.973 --> 00:34:16.308 Now, if you can begin by just filling out those forms. 482 00:34:16.469 --> 00:34:18.380 Those are insurance waivers. 483 00:34:18.551 --> 00:34:22.676 And then you'll find a list of various aspects of your face. 484 00:34:22.840 --> 00:34:24.880 Go ahead and check off anything that you think... 485 00:34:25.049 --> 00:34:27.384 ...you might want to improve on just a little bit. 486 00:34:30.234 --> 00:34:31.991 Are deuces still wild? 487 00:34:33.019 --> 00:34:34.132 No. 488 00:34:34.940 --> 00:34:36.216 I'm screwed. 489 00:34:38.877 --> 00:34:42.937 Well, I think I'm gonna go, guys. Carlos. Eduardo. Gustavo. 490 00:34:43.934 --> 00:34:46.423 Pleasure talking to you the last couple hours. 491 00:34:46.591 --> 00:34:48.795 Hey, congratulations on the baby too. 492 00:34:49.376 --> 00:34:52.126 - INS! - All right, hold it right there. 493 00:34:52.289 --> 00:34:54.428 - INS? - Hold it right there. 494 00:34:55.106 --> 00:34:56.383 You're not going anywhere. 495 00:34:56.546 --> 00:34:58.521 - Hold it right there! - You've gotta be kidding. 496 00:34:58.691 --> 00:34:59.738 Oh, this is hilarious. 497 00:34:59.907 --> 00:35:01.947 You guys know the drill. Let's see some papers. 498 00:35:02.116 --> 00:35:03.545 - Against the wall. - Papers. 499 00:35:03.716 --> 00:35:06.716 Where's my wallet? Where'd my wallet go? This is-- 500 00:35:06.885 --> 00:35:09.635 - No, no. I dropped my wallet. - Back up. 501 00:35:09.797 --> 00:35:11.773 - Oh, these are doozies. - What do you got? 502 00:35:11.942 --> 00:35:16.166 We got a Don Johnson, Elvis and Opie Taylor. 503 00:35:16.327 --> 00:35:18.532 - Dick Harper, you're free to go. - Dick Harper? 504 00:35:18.696 --> 00:35:22.659 That's me, Dick Harper. Hey, that guy's not Dick Harper! Whoa, jeez! 505 00:35:22.825 --> 00:35:23.905 We don't want problems. 506 00:35:24.074 --> 00:35:27.075 You're making a serious mistake in judgment. I am an American. 507 00:35:27.243 --> 00:35:28.934 You gotta work on your accent, Pablo. 508 00:35:29.099 --> 00:35:30.954 Could we--? You wanna talk to my wife, Jane? 509 00:35:31.115 --> 00:35:33.288 Yeah. Oh, okay, yeah. We'll call your wife, "Yane." 510 00:35:33.452 --> 00:35:36.552 We'll ask her if you're American. And we'll call my wife, Yennifer... 511 00:35:36.717 --> 00:35:39.435 - ... and his wife, Yaqueline, too. - It's ringing, it's ringing! 512 00:35:45.936 --> 00:35:48.905 No, wait! I'm an American! I swear to God! 513 00:35:49.073 --> 00:35:51.016 - Hey, watch your language. - Get in there. 514 00:35:51.186 --> 00:35:53.488 Okay, we have our results. 515 00:35:53.650 --> 00:35:58.124 Negative side effects with only three of 14 participants in the study. 516 00:35:58.293 --> 00:36:00.944 - That's not bad. Let's see, now. - Hello? 517 00:36:01.109 --> 00:36:03.314 - Jill? Hi, Jill. - Dick, what--? 518 00:36:03.477 --> 00:36:05.518 Oh, honey, I can barely under-- 519 00:36:05.686 --> 00:36:08.142 What--? Why are you doing that accent? 520 00:37:17.867 --> 00:37:19.044 Holy hell! 521 00:37:19.499 --> 00:37:21.190 I did this little cosmetics test... 522 00:37:21.355 --> 00:37:25.034 ...and I had a little reaction. Is it really that bad? 523 00:37:25.197 --> 00:37:28.875 No, it's not so bad. It's just different. 524 00:37:29.038 --> 00:37:31.079 Dick, can we talk about this some other time? 525 00:37:31.246 --> 00:37:33.254 Oh, yeah. Come on, come on. Go, go, go, go! 526 00:37:52.149 --> 00:37:55.631 I gotta go in. I gotta go to bed. 527 00:37:57.399 --> 00:37:59.089 You coming? 528 00:38:01.879 --> 00:38:04.465 I think I'm gonna sit in the car... 529 00:38:06.970 --> 00:38:09.173 ...and think for a while. 530 00:38:13.210 --> 00:38:14.640 Okay. 531 00:38:15.899 --> 00:38:18.867 Don't think for too long, we gotta get up early. 532 00:38:19.964 --> 00:38:22.070 Soup kitchens stop serving at 8. 533 00:38:49.733 --> 00:38:51.839 You're still pretty. 534 00:40:00.921 --> 00:40:02.832 I'm not playing anymore. 535 00:40:03.003 --> 00:40:05.142 I've just about had it! 536 00:40:13.885 --> 00:40:15.063 Sorry. 537 00:40:21.984 --> 00:40:25.280 O my God, I'm heartily sorry for having offended thee. 538 00:40:25.441 --> 00:40:28.224 It's okay. I'm putting it back. 539 00:40:28.386 --> 00:40:31.104 I'm putting it back! It's okay. 540 00:41:00.715 --> 00:41:04.132 Hon, what happened? 541 00:41:06.509 --> 00:41:08.451 I got the lawn back. 542 00:41:08.621 --> 00:41:10.476 Got the... ? 543 00:41:20.752 --> 00:41:22.641 Oh, Dick. 544 00:41:23.153 --> 00:41:24.615 It's beautiful. 545 00:41:26.355 --> 00:41:27.882 Honey. 546 00:41:31.667 --> 00:41:34.668 Oh, Dick, I love you. 547 00:41:34.837 --> 00:41:36.692 I love you. 548 00:42:48.906 --> 00:42:50.216 Are these too big for my face? 549 00:42:56.460 --> 00:42:58.119 Well, now you look like the Unabomber. 550 00:42:59.790 --> 00:43:01.546 Good. 551 00:43:01.710 --> 00:43:03.751 What are you doing with Billy's squirt gun? 552 00:43:04.431 --> 00:43:07.246 We followed the rules and we got screwed. 553 00:43:07.407 --> 00:43:09.645 We were good people, honest people... 554 00:43:09.809 --> 00:43:11.948 ...and we got screwed. 555 00:43:12.337 --> 00:43:13.864 Damn it! 556 00:43:15.537 --> 00:43:17.872 What are you gonna do now, you gonna rob a bank? 557 00:43:18.034 --> 00:43:20.556 We got screwed. Over and over again, hon. 558 00:43:20.724 --> 00:43:22.896 I stole the lawn back, and you know what happened? 559 00:43:23.060 --> 00:43:24.751 We have a lawn now. 560 00:43:25.044 --> 00:43:27.664 Yeah, but-- Okay. 561 00:43:28.662 --> 00:43:30.092 We're all just cavemen... 562 00:43:30.262 --> 00:43:32.980 ...trying to protect our little patch of land. 563 00:43:33.144 --> 00:43:34.834 Well, now I have a club... 564 00:43:35.000 --> 00:43:37.553 ...and I'm gonna take what I need. 565 00:43:37.816 --> 00:43:40.534 Maybe you should steal some Prozac. 566 00:43:41.977 --> 00:43:44.945 Keep laughing, Jane. Keep laughing, okay? 567 00:43:45.115 --> 00:43:46.424 I'll be back soon... 568 00:43:46.587 --> 00:43:49.435 - ... with the loot. - Oh, no, no, no. I'm coming. 569 00:43:49.595 --> 00:43:51.768 - Not gonna miss this for the world. - Suit yourself. 570 00:43:51.932 --> 00:43:54.933 Besides, you're gonna need a good wheelman. 571 00:44:03.616 --> 00:44:05.526 Okay, that's it, joke's over. Let's go home. 572 00:44:05.696 --> 00:44:06.941 - Come on. - No, no, no. 573 00:44:07.105 --> 00:44:09.277 - We haven't done the caper yet. - Wow, okay, you-- 574 00:44:09.442 --> 00:44:11.744 Then-- Then let's do it before, you know... 575 00:44:11.906 --> 00:44:13.663 ...we die of carbon-monoxide poisoning. 576 00:44:13.827 --> 00:44:15.616 When you're in there, get me some Sno-Caps. 577 00:44:16.068 --> 00:44:18.403 Oh, no, no, no, Raisinets, Raisinets. I want Raisinets. 578 00:44:20.517 --> 00:44:22.492 Hon, your thingamabob. 579 00:44:22.661 --> 00:44:24.898 - I know, I know. - All right. 580 00:44:27.366 --> 00:44:29.921 And don't forget to kill the witnesses, hon. 581 00:44:31.112 --> 00:44:32.519 Okay. 582 00:44:43.243 --> 00:44:44.651 Hi. 583 00:45:19.734 --> 00:45:21.490 Brain freeze. 584 00:45:22.551 --> 00:45:24.143 You ever get that? 585 00:45:44.381 --> 00:45:49.117 One Brainfreeze. Anything else? 586 00:45:50.622 --> 00:45:54.683 Yeah. Yeah, I got something else... 587 00:45:54.848 --> 00:45:56.671 ...right here. 588 00:45:59.233 --> 00:46:01.306 Hey, Jake, take a break. I got this one. 589 00:46:07.011 --> 00:46:09.695 That'll be 1.29, please. 590 00:46:21.992 --> 00:46:23.847 1.29. 591 00:46:26.120 --> 00:46:29.570 Go! Jane, go! Just go! 592 00:46:41.357 --> 00:46:43.081 Oh, God. You did it? 593 00:46:43.246 --> 00:46:44.676 Oh, there that is. 594 00:46:44.847 --> 00:46:47.946 - That was wild. That was wild! - You actually robbed that place? 595 00:46:48.111 --> 00:46:51.014 No, but I had a slushie and I didn't even pay for it. 596 00:46:54.641 --> 00:46:57.609 - What? - Well, then our problems... 597 00:46:57.778 --> 00:46:59.404 ...are pretty much over. 598 00:46:59.571 --> 00:47:03.402 Jane, just drive the car, okay? We'll find another place, okay? 599 00:47:09.974 --> 00:47:12.692 Give me your money! Garth! 600 00:47:12.855 --> 00:47:14.229 Dick? 601 00:47:14.390 --> 00:47:17.653 - Oh, my God. - You remember Jane. 602 00:47:17.816 --> 00:47:19.671 - She's in the car. - Jane? 603 00:47:19.833 --> 00:47:21.142 - Hi, Garth. - Hey, Jane. 604 00:47:21.305 --> 00:47:23.510 - Hon, it's-- Garth. - What's with this? 605 00:47:23.674 --> 00:47:27.352 - From the barbeque. - Harper, what are you--? 606 00:47:27.515 --> 00:47:29.042 I had you going there. 607 00:47:29.211 --> 00:47:30.935 Had me going? You scared me to death. 608 00:47:31.099 --> 00:47:32.563 - Yeah, well.... - You're a madman. 609 00:47:32.732 --> 00:47:34.555 - We should hang out soon. - All right. 610 00:47:34.716 --> 00:47:36.986 Yeah, you wanna hang out with Garth soon, hon? 611 00:47:37.149 --> 00:47:38.524 - All right. - All right. 612 00:47:38.686 --> 00:47:41.305 Drive. Just drive. Just drive the car. 613 00:47:41.472 --> 00:47:43.960 - Okay, Dick. - Okay. 614 00:47:52.770 --> 00:47:55.072 My car's right there. 615 00:47:55.235 --> 00:47:58.584 Get that for you, then. Okay. 616 00:47:58.757 --> 00:48:00.797 - Thank you, sonny. Thank you. - Oh, no, l-- 617 00:48:00.964 --> 00:48:03.071 Well, maybe. 618 00:48:05.285 --> 00:48:07.293 Okay, stop the car. 619 00:48:10.439 --> 00:48:12.709 Now, that place is loaded. 620 00:48:12.872 --> 00:48:14.814 They are ripe for the picking. 621 00:48:14.984 --> 00:48:18.847 And you are just the guy for the job. 622 00:48:19.017 --> 00:48:21.637 But seriously, doesn't this remind you of that movie Heat... 623 00:48:21.803 --> 00:48:23.712 - ... with Val Kilmer--? - I'm trying my best. 624 00:48:23.883 --> 00:48:27.179 There's nothing to be ashamed of, is all I'm saying. Some people.... 625 00:48:27.340 --> 00:48:31.051 Some people have that robbing thing and-- And some people don't. 626 00:48:31.213 --> 00:48:32.620 Maybe... 627 00:48:32.781 --> 00:48:34.757 ...you're not a badass. 628 00:48:37.327 --> 00:48:39.302 Hey, man. What can I do you for? 629 00:48:39.472 --> 00:48:41.327 You can do me for all the money in the till. 630 00:48:41.488 --> 00:48:44.107 - This is a stickup. - Whoa, what's wrong with you, dude? 631 00:48:44.274 --> 00:48:46.129 I'm married, that's what's wrong with me. 632 00:48:49.714 --> 00:48:51.570 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 633 00:48:51.731 --> 00:48:54.513 Move it, paraquat! Come on, Zig-Zag. 634 00:48:55.284 --> 00:48:57.226 That's a real gun. You're robbing me. 635 00:48:57.397 --> 00:49:00.080 - Dick? - Honey, robe. 636 00:49:00.918 --> 00:49:03.253 Oh, God, okay. Sweetheart, I'm sorry. 637 00:49:03.415 --> 00:49:05.968 Listen to me. What are you doing, are you craz--? 638 00:49:06.135 --> 00:49:08.077 - What? - Listen, put your hands down. 639 00:49:08.249 --> 00:49:10.518 - He's been stressed. - Why are you undercutting me? 640 00:49:10.681 --> 00:49:12.852 - To be fair, we both-- - I'm trying to rob this man. 641 00:49:13.018 --> 00:49:16.084 - We don't need to do this. - I got a call about the mortgage. 642 00:49:16.249 --> 00:49:20.212 If we don't pay tomorrow, the sheriff's coming to put us out on the street. 643 00:49:21.659 --> 00:49:23.962 Get the money out of there right now, I mean it! 644 00:49:24.124 --> 00:49:26.743 - Pull it out, put it in a sack! Let's go! - Easy, hon. 645 00:49:26.909 --> 00:49:29.299 - God! Oh, God! - Come on. 646 00:49:30.749 --> 00:49:33.434 Wow, that's fantastic. Women are amazing, aren't they? 647 00:49:33.599 --> 00:49:34.909 It's just like jelly jars. 648 00:49:35.072 --> 00:49:37.755 Whoa, hon! Hon! 649 00:49:38.305 --> 00:49:40.377 - Look, look. - Hon? 650 00:49:40.546 --> 00:49:43.328 - What? - I don't think anybody's following us. 651 00:49:43.490 --> 00:49:44.951 God! 652 00:49:45.859 --> 00:49:47.614 Oh, look out for that. 653 00:49:55.494 --> 00:49:57.382 Oh, park under there. 654 00:50:07.401 --> 00:50:09.026 Oh, my God. 655 00:50:09.194 --> 00:50:12.675 - I can't believe we just did that. - But we did do it. 656 00:50:12.843 --> 00:50:14.785 We did do it. 657 00:50:28.847 --> 00:50:28.975 It's not like we stole from some old lady, you know? 658 00:50:28.975 --> 00:50:31.212 It's not like we stole from some old lady, you know? 659 00:50:31.376 --> 00:50:34.094 Exactly. And you know, maybe we can figure out a way we can... 660 00:50:34.257 --> 00:50:36.559 ...give back some of what we've taken to other people. 661 00:50:36.722 --> 00:50:38.958 Maybe we will. It's a definite possibility. 662 00:50:39.123 --> 00:50:40.530 Wanna grab a cup of coffee? 663 00:50:40.690 --> 00:50:43.178 - Iced mocha sounds nice. - Yeah. 664 00:50:44.084 --> 00:50:47.881 All right, this is a holdup. Get on the ground and you won't get hurt. 665 00:50:48.052 --> 00:50:49.613 Whoa, Jesus. Are you okay, hon? 666 00:50:49.781 --> 00:50:50.959 - I'm okay. - All right. 667 00:50:51.126 --> 00:50:53.395 You. Two iced mochas, let's go. Move it, move it. 668 00:50:53.559 --> 00:50:55.250 - Two iced mochas. - Yeah. Whipped cream. 669 00:50:55.415 --> 00:50:57.487 - Whipped cream. - Any whipped cream, hon, on yours? 670 00:50:57.656 --> 00:50:58.834 - No, thanks. - None on hers. 671 00:50:58.999 --> 00:51:01.870 - No whipped cream. - Are these nonfat muffins? 672 00:51:02.041 --> 00:51:03.797 - Are they nonfat muffins? ! - I think so. 673 00:51:03.961 --> 00:51:06.679 Okay. Hon, these are nonfat muffins. Get some of those. 674 00:51:06.842 --> 00:51:09.493 - Which ones, vanilla or chocolate? - In the back, in the back. 675 00:51:09.659 --> 00:51:10.837 - This one? - No, no, that one. 676 00:51:11.003 --> 00:51:12.598 - Front? Honey! - No, that one. Okay. 677 00:51:12.764 --> 00:51:15.318 Yeah, okay, that's good. Okay, nobody try to follow us... 678 00:51:15.485 --> 00:51:17.907 ...because we're desperate criminals. We're crazy people! 679 00:51:18.077 --> 00:51:20.282 And I'll kill you all! 680 00:51:20.446 --> 00:51:23.130 - Oh, hon, the coffee. Coffee. - Oh, yeah, right. 681 00:51:24.159 --> 00:51:26.014 Thanks a lot. 682 00:51:30.336 --> 00:51:32.093 What are you doing in there? 683 00:51:32.257 --> 00:51:33.851 What do you think? 684 00:51:34.722 --> 00:51:38.300 - It's Elvis on a motorcycle? - It's Evel Knievel, hon. 685 00:51:38.467 --> 00:51:40.540 I like the way it makes my butt look. 686 00:52:19.567 --> 00:52:22.089 Honey, where's my car? 687 00:52:33.139 --> 00:52:34.962 Mercedes, off. 688 00:52:43.895 --> 00:52:46.164 Now I can watch soccer! 689 00:52:46.327 --> 00:52:49.677 No matter what happens, know that I love you. 690 00:52:49.848 --> 00:52:51.539 I love you too. 691 00:52:51.704 --> 00:52:53.363 - Let's do this. - Okay. 692 00:52:53.529 --> 00:52:56.344 Go, go, go, go! Go, go, go, go! 693 00:53:08.670 --> 00:53:10.263 Oh, my God. 694 00:53:10.430 --> 00:53:13.147 This guy's really loaded. 695 00:53:14.847 --> 00:53:17.237 That's a lot of lettuce. 696 00:53:18.913 --> 00:53:20.953 Should we pistol-whip him? 697 00:53:26.530 --> 00:53:28.473 Hey, don't laugh. 698 00:53:28.643 --> 00:53:30.104 Don't you laugh now, okay? 699 00:53:30.596 --> 00:53:32.604 Because it demeans what we're doing here. 700 00:53:32.772 --> 00:53:34.333 Yeah. 701 00:53:38.534 --> 00:53:40.290 - Anyway, shall we? - Let's do it. 702 00:53:40.455 --> 00:53:42.048 - What--? What is that? - Nothing. 703 00:53:43.111 --> 00:53:44.835 Don't do anything funny, or else. 704 00:53:48.808 --> 00:53:51.198 You could pay the ultimate price. 705 00:54:16.176 --> 00:54:18.829 Honey, come on, cut the crap. 706 00:54:20.049 --> 00:54:21.479 Okay. 707 00:54:25.523 --> 00:54:27.378 We sound so funny. 708 00:54:27.539 --> 00:54:30.224 I know. That's what I was thinking. 709 00:54:30.612 --> 00:54:32.686 Oh, my God. 710 00:54:34.613 --> 00:54:35.662 Hel-- 711 00:54:48.218 --> 00:54:51.567 Did you guys hear what happened to Bob Blaustein? 712 00:54:52.220 --> 00:54:53.365 - Bob Blaustein? - Yeah. 713 00:54:53.532 --> 00:54:56.467 - Who's Bob Blaustein? - Oh, he works at Sonent Global. 714 00:54:56.636 --> 00:54:59.124 Or should I say he worked at Sonent Global. 715 00:54:59.293 --> 00:55:01.715 - Yeah. - Yeah, and if they're not careful... 716 00:55:01.886 --> 00:55:03.642 ...they'll become the next Pyramid Tech. 717 00:55:03.806 --> 00:55:06.196 Absolutely. Absolutely. 718 00:55:06.367 --> 00:55:07.894 Oh, Dick... 719 00:55:08.063 --> 00:55:10.169 ...what you been up to since Globodyne went under? 720 00:55:10.336 --> 00:55:13.118 Just working at home, playing in the stock market. 721 00:55:13.281 --> 00:55:15.005 I tell you, guys... 722 00:55:15.682 --> 00:55:18.717 - ... it's like stealing money. - You're on fire, Dick. 723 00:55:24.644 --> 00:55:27.580 - Last job, try to stay focused. - Okay. 724 00:55:28.645 --> 00:55:31.135 - Let me hold that door for you, ma'am. - Why, thank you. 725 00:55:31.302 --> 00:55:32.829 You're welcome. 726 00:55:34.567 --> 00:55:36.804 Oh, my goodness. This woman has fainted. 727 00:55:37.320 --> 00:55:39.655 - Are you all right? - You might wanna open her blouse... 728 00:55:39.817 --> 00:55:40.995 ...so she can... 729 00:55:41.161 --> 00:55:42.536 - ... breathe. - Right. 730 00:55:42.698 --> 00:55:45.415 - Oh, no, no, no, no, l-- - You okay? 731 00:55:49.740 --> 00:55:51.147 Oh, no. 732 00:55:52.588 --> 00:55:53.570 That's good. 733 00:55:54.317 --> 00:55:56.292 - Let me get back to you. Excuse me. - Yes? 734 00:55:56.621 --> 00:55:58.694 - May I help you? - Vault inspector. 735 00:56:00.399 --> 00:56:03.434 - What happened to Phil? - Necrotizing fasciitis. 736 00:56:03.599 --> 00:56:05.542 Caused by an invasive streptococcus. 737 00:56:06.192 --> 00:56:07.534 What? 738 00:56:07.696 --> 00:56:09.355 Flesh-eating disorder. 739 00:56:09.522 --> 00:56:11.464 It's all over the money. 740 00:56:11.634 --> 00:56:13.903 Might wanna wash your hands. 741 00:56:25.910 --> 00:56:28.148 - Everybody down! - This is a robbery! 742 00:56:28.310 --> 00:56:31.410 - No way! - Freeze, everybody. 743 00:56:36.633 --> 00:56:39.023 Oh, God. Oh, my God. 744 00:56:39.193 --> 00:56:41.615 - Oh, no. - Nobody move a muscle. 745 00:56:41.787 --> 00:56:44.341 You. Whiskers, whiskers. On the floor. 746 00:56:44.507 --> 00:56:45.915 Oh, Dick. 747 00:56:46.076 --> 00:56:47.669 I will blow those whiskers... 748 00:56:47.837 --> 00:56:49.363 - ... right off your face! - I'm down! 749 00:56:49.534 --> 00:56:52.185 - Go get the money, please. - You're-- You're money, I'm guns... 750 00:56:52.350 --> 00:56:54.969 - ... that's the plan. - Put your weapons down. 751 00:56:55.135 --> 00:56:57.175 - Oh, shit. - Stick to the plan, stick to the plan. 752 00:56:57.344 --> 00:57:00.791 - I'm putting the weapon down. - Bring it on, pigs! 753 00:57:00.960 --> 00:57:02.815 - Honey. - What are you doing? 754 00:57:02.977 --> 00:57:05.367 Oh, Dick. Oh, Dick. Oh, Dick. Run, Dick, run. 755 00:57:05.537 --> 00:57:07.545 - You coward! - Stay on the ground. 756 00:57:07.714 --> 00:57:10.136 - Whoa, boy. - You quitter! 757 00:57:10.307 --> 00:57:13.275 - I'm cuffed! I'm cuffed! - You filthy pig. 758 00:57:13.444 --> 00:57:15.004 - I'm sorry. - Bring it on. 759 00:57:15.171 --> 00:57:17.539 - Bring it on, I'll take on all of you! - Oz? 760 00:57:17.701 --> 00:57:20.801 - Hon, get the car! Get the car! - Debbie. 761 00:57:22.278 --> 00:57:23.687 - Thank you very much. - Oh, Dick. 762 00:57:23.848 --> 00:57:25.441 Honey. 763 00:57:28.168 --> 00:57:29.892 Oh, thank God. 764 00:57:31.209 --> 00:57:31.337 Oz and Debbie Peterson... 765 00:57:31.337 --> 00:57:32.264 Oz and Debbie Peterson... 766 00:57:32.425 --> 00:57:34.401 ... former employees of now-defunct Globodyne... 767 00:57:34.569 --> 00:57:36.479 ... were charged with armed robbery... 768 00:57:36.650 --> 00:57:41.124 - ... after holding up a local branch... - Dick. Dick, that could have been us. 769 00:57:41.291 --> 00:57:42.568 What were we thinking? 770 00:57:42.733 --> 00:57:46.508 - and turned to crime as a result of their sudden unemployment, 771 00:57:47.150 --> 00:57:50.217 Like this woman, Naomi Seiler, a human-resources manager... 772 00:57:50.383 --> 00:57:53.417 ... caught last May managing a different kind of resource: 773 00:57:53.583 --> 00:57:57.130 220 kilos of Canada 's finest marijuana, 774 00:57:57.489 --> 00:58:01.287 I knew her. She always remembered everybody's birthday. 775 00:58:01.458 --> 00:58:05.036 Or this man, Mark Fish, a former VP of Globodyne, , , 776 00:58:05.202 --> 00:58:07.658 ... who was arrested after using his home as the setting... 777 00:58:07.826 --> 00:58:09.715 ... for secret high-stakes cockfights, 778 00:58:09.876 --> 00:58:13.293 Mark Fish? He was such a nice guy. 779 00:58:13.461 --> 00:58:15.218 Globodyne CFO Frank Bascombe... 780 00:58:15.382 --> 00:58:18.383 ...starts serving his 18-month prison term next week, 781 00:58:18.550 --> 00:58:21.366 - Eighteen months? That's nothing. - Bastard. 782 00:58:21.527 --> 00:58:23.568 - -trying to incriminate Jack McAllister, 783 00:58:23.737 --> 00:58:26.770 - Oh, yeah. - I don't think I got away with anything, 784 00:58:26.936 --> 00:58:29.839 The collapse of Globodyne hurt me financially and personally... 785 00:58:30.011 --> 00:58:33.808 ... just like any other employee, I'm sick about it, 786 00:58:34.683 --> 00:58:36.593 I'm et up about it, 787 00:58:38.301 --> 00:58:40.407 Now watch this shot, 788 00:58:44.094 --> 00:58:45.720 Did I get him? 789 00:58:46.527 --> 00:58:47.705 - Now you did, - Great, 790 00:58:47.871 --> 00:58:49.246 Look at that guy. 791 00:58:49.408 --> 00:58:52.954 Everybody's in hell, he's on vacation shooting stuff. 792 00:58:53.120 --> 00:58:56.471 Man, I hope every one of these bastards get what they deserve. 793 00:58:56.642 --> 00:58:58.552 Prosecutors say next to be indicted will be... 794 00:58:58.722 --> 00:59:00.762 ... company spin doctor Dick Harper, 795 00:59:01.155 --> 00:59:03.489 - Harper gave misleading statements... - What? Indicted? 796 00:59:03.652 --> 00:59:06.336 ... about Globodyne's finances one minute before the company... 797 00:59:06.502 --> 00:59:08.705 - Indicted? - That's not fair. They made you... 798 00:59:08.869 --> 00:59:10.593 ...go on that show. 799 00:59:10.758 --> 00:59:12.929 You hear what they said? I'm gonna be indicted. 800 00:59:13.095 --> 00:59:15.429 - But you only said what they told you. - Indicted, Jane! 801 00:59:15.592 --> 00:59:18.113 Indicted. I'm gonna be indicted. 802 00:59:18.279 --> 00:59:19.774 - Wait, it's gonna be-- - Indicted! 803 00:59:19.945 --> 00:59:21.701 - Honey-- Dick-- - Indicted! 804 00:59:21.865 --> 00:59:23.043 - Honey-- - Gonna be indicted! 805 00:59:23.209 --> 00:59:26.058 Hold it, they can't-- It's gonna be okay. Just calm down. 806 00:59:26.218 --> 00:59:29.896 I can't calm down, I'm gonna be indicted. Indicted! 807 00:59:30.604 --> 00:59:32.842 I'm gonna be indicted! 808 00:59:33.292 --> 00:59:35.235 Indicted! 809 00:59:36.462 --> 00:59:38.763 I'm gonna be indicted! 810 00:59:38.926 --> 00:59:40.781 Be indicted! 811 00:59:49.041 --> 00:59:52.206 You know, I haven't seen you in the downtown club for a while, sir. 812 00:59:53.362 --> 00:59:56.975 Well, that's because I was very, very busy... 813 00:59:57.140 --> 00:59:59.442 ...being indicted. 814 01:00:13.752 --> 01:00:17.014 Look at all the executives. 815 01:00:18.777 --> 01:00:23.219 You guys are my kind of peeps. 816 01:00:23.387 --> 01:00:26.999 Captains of industry, masters of the universe... 817 01:00:27.164 --> 01:00:31.289 ...presidents of Hair Club for Men. That's a nice piece of hair. 818 01:00:31.453 --> 01:00:34.105 You can't even see the tread marks. 819 01:00:34.878 --> 01:00:38.261 This squirrel died of natural causes. 820 01:00:39.392 --> 01:00:42.011 Excuse me, pardon me. 821 01:00:42.912 --> 01:00:49.057 I gotta get to the "toppytip" of the financial summit. 822 01:00:49.218 --> 01:00:51.226 Isn't anyone going to do anything? 823 01:00:51.395 --> 01:00:54.625 This happens every week. This guy actually isn't that bad. 824 01:00:58.502 --> 01:01:00.411 I'm a corporate puppet. 825 01:01:01.126 --> 01:01:03.778 And I'm gonna need some more string... 826 01:01:03.943 --> 01:01:07.107 ...so I can go on believing I'll be a real boy someday... 827 01:01:07.271 --> 01:01:09.858 - ... without being manipulated... - No, no, no, I got it. 828 01:01:10.025 --> 01:01:11.781 ...by the bullshit! 829 01:01:11.945 --> 01:01:14.182 Oh, my God, Dick. Come down from there. 830 01:01:18.090 --> 01:01:22.370 Hon, I'm in the middle of a very important meeting. 831 01:01:22.540 --> 01:01:25.923 Sweetie, you're standing on a table pretending to be a puppet. 832 01:01:26.093 --> 01:01:27.818 Who's pretending? 833 01:01:30.543 --> 01:01:33.510 - Couldn't you have just cut him off? - He only had half a beer. 834 01:01:40.913 --> 01:01:43.783 Dick, hi. Long time no see. 835 01:01:46.034 --> 01:01:50.291 - Frank! Frank! - I'm gonna get him. Just-- 836 01:01:52.373 --> 01:01:55.855 Frank, where are you going? 837 01:01:56.214 --> 01:01:59.630 - Dick! - Come on, Frank. 838 01:01:59.798 --> 01:02:03.280 I just wanna have a talk. 839 01:02:04.248 --> 01:02:05.591 Hey there, Frankie. 840 01:02:05.752 --> 01:02:08.982 How do you like those eggs Florentine? 841 01:02:09.145 --> 01:02:12.146 Wait, wait, wait! Wait, it was Jack. 842 01:02:12.314 --> 01:02:13.591 It was Jack. 843 01:02:13.755 --> 01:02:16.309 He siphoned off all of Globodyne's assets... 844 01:02:16.475 --> 01:02:19.738 ...and then he dumped the stock. It was his plan from the beginning. 845 01:02:19.932 --> 01:02:21.842 Son of a bitch! 846 01:02:22.141 --> 01:02:23.603 That fucker! 847 01:02:23.773 --> 01:02:26.708 - Hon, language. - She's right. 848 01:02:26.910 --> 01:02:28.252 When you get out of prison... 849 01:02:28.414 --> 01:02:30.520 ...you'll get $20 million to keep your mouth shut. 850 01:02:30.719 --> 01:02:33.469 No, 10. You think I could have gotten 20? 851 01:02:33.856 --> 01:02:35.351 You son of a b-- 852 01:02:35.521 --> 01:02:37.660 - You'll break-- Dick. - I want him. 853 01:02:37.825 --> 01:02:40.444 - Let go. - Don't you think I feel terrible? 854 01:02:40.610 --> 01:02:42.814 Why do you think I'm drinking myself to death? 855 01:02:42.978 --> 01:02:46.275 Instead of drinking, why don't you do something about it. 856 01:02:46.436 --> 01:02:50.015 Yeah, Frank. Sometimes the cure is a clean conscience. 857 01:02:51.654 --> 01:02:54.949 - That is good. - Thanks, hon. 858 01:02:55.110 --> 01:02:56.933 - I just thought of it. - You did? 859 01:02:57.095 --> 01:02:58.918 - Yeah. - You're right. 860 01:02:59.080 --> 01:03:00.990 You're right. Help me up. Help me up. 861 01:03:01.161 --> 01:03:04.129 Yeah, help me up. I gotta think of something. 862 01:03:04.489 --> 01:03:06.530 Okay, just give me a minute. Just give me-- 863 01:03:06.698 --> 01:03:08.521 Hey. 864 01:03:08.683 --> 01:03:10.276 Hey! 865 01:03:13.164 --> 01:03:17.802 - Not this time, Frank. - I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 866 01:03:17.966 --> 01:03:21.861 It's force of habit. I know a way. I know a way. 867 01:03:23.183 --> 01:03:26.729 But it's really, really risky. 868 01:03:28.016 --> 01:03:29.194 That's where Jack keeps it. 869 01:03:29.361 --> 01:03:32.461 Four hundred million in highly liquid U.S. bearer bonds. 870 01:03:32.626 --> 01:03:36.204 So it's a vault job. Go in after midnight, bypass security... 871 01:03:36.371 --> 01:03:38.346 ...and... power tools. 872 01:03:38.514 --> 01:03:40.620 - It's a little simpler than that. - Power tools? 873 01:03:42.164 --> 01:03:45.394 Jack's gonna have to take those bonds out of the safe-deposit box, 874 01:03:45.557 --> 01:03:46.899 That should be fun for him, 875 01:03:47.061 --> 01:03:48.271 Here's my babies. 876 01:03:48.438 --> 01:03:50.860 So, what's he gonna do with the money? 877 01:03:51.127 --> 01:03:53.364 There it is, the Grand Cayman Bank. 878 01:03:53.527 --> 01:03:55.088 Grand Cayman. What is this place? 879 01:03:55.288 --> 01:03:57.329 It's where rich people go to evade taxes, 880 01:03:57.497 --> 01:03:58.904 - Bastards, - Honey, 881 01:03:59.065 --> 01:04:01.335 They can't hear us, What's next? 882 01:04:01.785 --> 01:04:03.990 McAllister takes the bonds to a representative... 883 01:04:04.154 --> 01:04:07.221 ... who asks him for his signature to verify what they call "membership, " 884 01:04:07.387 --> 01:04:09.176 Once the bonds are counted and confirmed... 885 01:04:09.341 --> 01:04:12.188 ... McAllister will receive a CRM-114 deposit form... 886 01:04:12.349 --> 01:04:14.684 ... and on this form he inputs his account number... 887 01:04:14.846 --> 01:04:17.782 ... that only he and the bank know, Then the agent will take this... 888 01:04:17.951 --> 01:04:20.340 ...to an authorization officer for further verification. 889 01:04:20.512 --> 01:04:23.381 Once the representative has stamped and initialed the document... 890 01:04:23.551 --> 01:04:25.886 ... the account rep will take the CRM-114... 891 01:04:26.049 --> 01:04:29.595 ... back to McAllister for final approval before finalization, 892 01:04:29.763 --> 01:04:31.519 You said this was gonna be simple. 893 01:04:31.906 --> 01:04:34.362 Can you explain it again? Jane doesn't seem to understand. 894 01:04:34.532 --> 01:04:37.793 - Jane, it's simple. It's so simple. - Jeez. 895 01:04:37.955 --> 01:04:39.483 Now, listen. 896 01:04:39.653 --> 01:04:41.727 All we have to do... 897 01:04:42.886 --> 01:04:46.913 ... is switch McAllister’s CRM-114 with his account number... 898 01:04:47.079 --> 01:04:48.486 ... with one of our own, 899 01:04:48.647 --> 01:04:50.470 - I'm so sorry. - A copy that we have made... 900 01:04:50.633 --> 01:04:55.074 ...that has a number from an account that I have established. 901 01:04:55.240 --> 01:04:59.333 And Jack sends the 400 million to us without knowing it. 902 01:04:59.498 --> 01:05:01.321 That's-- You got it. It's so simple. 903 01:05:01.483 --> 01:05:03.524 That is beautiful. It's a switch. 904 01:05:03.692 --> 01:05:05.121 - It's a switch, - It's a switch, 905 01:05:05.293 --> 01:05:06.820 - It's a switch. - That's so sexy, man. 906 01:05:06.989 --> 01:05:10.088 - That's unbelievable. It'll be fun. - But Jane's gonna have to do it. 907 01:05:10.253 --> 01:05:13.964 Because if McAllister sees either one of us, he'll know something's up. 908 01:05:14.127 --> 01:05:17.128 - And I... ? - Do nothing. 909 01:05:18.639 --> 01:05:20.582 I can do that. 910 01:05:22.033 --> 01:05:23.243 Yeah. 911 01:05:23.409 --> 01:05:24.719 Okay. 912 01:05:24.882 --> 01:05:27.185 - You do it, then. You're the one. - Yeah. 913 01:05:27.347 --> 01:05:28.753 Yeah. 914 01:05:30.964 --> 01:05:32.720 - You could do it, except-- - No, it's good. 915 01:05:32.884 --> 01:05:34.740 No, you do it. You do it. You do it. 916 01:05:34.901 --> 01:05:36.724 - You deserve to do it. - Honey-- 917 01:05:42.839 --> 01:05:45.174 Are you ready to make the switch? Do you have the form? 918 01:05:45.335 --> 01:05:47.856 - It's right here. - We should practice the move. 919 01:05:48.025 --> 01:05:49.334 - No, I got it. - Okay, fine. 920 01:05:49.497 --> 01:05:51.701 I won't be involved. I won't participate at all. 921 01:05:51.865 --> 01:05:54.255 - You do it. It's all you. - Let's do one for good luck. 922 01:05:54.425 --> 01:05:56.728 I got dressed up. You're not doing me any favors. 923 01:05:56.891 --> 01:05:59.226 - Get out of the car! - I just think it's important. 924 01:05:59.388 --> 01:06:00.949 That's all. 925 01:06:01.341 --> 01:06:05.051 Okay, I'll be the bank representative. And you be you. 926 01:06:07.486 --> 01:06:09.691 Hey. Hey! Wait, sir. 927 01:06:09.855 --> 01:06:12.343 - No! No, no. No! - Sorry. 928 01:06:16.512 --> 01:06:19.296 - Everybody ready? - No. 929 01:06:19.810 --> 01:06:23.072 - What? - Well, Dick lost the form. 930 01:06:23.234 --> 01:06:24.958 - So.... - What? 931 01:06:25.602 --> 01:06:27.578 Do you have an extra copy? 932 01:06:27.748 --> 01:06:30.050 Do you have any idea what I went through to get that? ! 933 01:06:30.212 --> 01:06:32.220 Oh, let me guess, a fifth of Scotch! 934 01:06:32.997 --> 01:06:34.372 You son of a-- 935 01:06:34.534 --> 01:06:36.477 Wait. Stop it. Knock it off! 936 01:06:36.647 --> 01:06:38.818 My God. Wait a second. Can we get another one? 937 01:06:38.984 --> 01:06:40.510 Is that possible? How can we do that? 938 01:06:40.680 --> 01:06:42.469 You know what, I'm gonna take the car... 939 01:06:42.633 --> 01:06:44.389 ...and I'm gonna try to delay McAllister. 940 01:06:44.553 --> 01:06:46.626 - He's here. He's here. - Oh, God. 941 01:06:49.098 --> 01:06:50.659 - What are you--? - I'm going. 942 01:06:57.645 --> 01:07:00.745 That was not cool. 943 01:07:02.862 --> 01:07:04.750 Okay. It's very simple. I got it. 944 01:07:04.911 --> 01:07:06.372 - I got it. It's very simple. - What? 945 01:07:06.543 --> 01:07:09.839 Go into the bank. Go into the office of the client-relations coordinator. 946 01:07:10.001 --> 01:07:13.546 The document forms are backed up on her disk, you have to print one out. 947 01:07:13.714 --> 01:07:17.937 - Who's this guy? Do I say hello? - Never mind. Just blow past them. 948 01:07:25.621 --> 01:07:27.476 Quaint. 949 01:07:29.270 --> 01:07:30.929 McAllister, 12 o'clock. 950 01:07:31.095 --> 01:07:34.194 Okay, I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go stall him. 951 01:07:35.063 --> 01:07:36.493 - Hon. - What? 952 01:07:36.664 --> 01:07:39.282 How am I supposed to find the client-relations coordinator? 953 01:07:39.448 --> 01:07:41.424 Turn around. 954 01:07:58.462 --> 01:08:02.358 Oh, my-- Oh, my God. Oh, my God, Jack McAllister. 955 01:08:04.960 --> 01:08:08.506 - I'm sorry? - It's me, Deb Festerbooth. 956 01:08:19.172 --> 01:08:21.081 - Hi. - Hi. 957 01:08:22.373 --> 01:08:25.275 Oh, is that the legendary espresso machine? 958 01:08:25.766 --> 01:08:26.912 You want some? 959 01:08:27.079 --> 01:08:28.573 - Really, could l? - Sure, yeah. 960 01:08:28.743 --> 01:08:30.499 - Good to see you. - From the fundraiser. 961 01:08:30.663 --> 01:08:34.309 I am truly sorry, but I really don't recall you, Miss... ? 962 01:08:34.473 --> 01:08:37.703 Festerbrook-- Booth. Yes. No, listen, this is crazy. 963 01:08:37.866 --> 01:08:39.622 You have to remember. 964 01:08:45.420 --> 01:08:47.973 - And here you go. - Thank you. 965 01:08:48.141 --> 01:08:49.733 Oh, excuse me. That's my phone. 966 01:08:49.901 --> 01:08:51.559 Oh, me too. 967 01:08:53.327 --> 01:08:55.083 Grand Cayman Bank, how may I help you? 968 01:08:55.439 --> 01:08:57.327 Karen Williams, please. 969 01:08:59.536 --> 01:09:01.959 - This is Karen. - Yes, Mrs. Williams... 970 01:09:02.128 --> 01:09:05.674 ...this is Officer Redgreen... 971 01:09:05.841 --> 01:09:08.329 ...of the MVPDL. 972 01:09:08.498 --> 01:09:11.848 And we've recovered a stolen vehicle that is registered in your name. 973 01:09:12.019 --> 01:09:14.509 We'd appreciate it if you could come to the impound lot-- 974 01:09:14.676 --> 01:09:16.781 What? My car's been stolen? 975 01:09:17.109 --> 01:09:21.201 Don't you remember my tattoo of a green monkey on my ass? 976 01:09:21.366 --> 01:09:23.472 Someone stole my car right out of the parking lot. 977 01:09:23.639 --> 01:09:25.133 No way. 978 01:09:33.626 --> 01:09:36.147 - Yeah. - It's Dick. 979 01:09:36.443 --> 01:09:37.425 I got it. 980 01:09:39.195 --> 01:09:40.624 - Dick. - Yeah. 981 01:09:40.956 --> 01:09:44.338 Is the client-relations coordinator a blond woman with a red scarf? 982 01:09:44.509 --> 01:09:47.805 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - She noticed her car isn't stolen. 983 01:09:47.967 --> 01:09:51.546 - What's the account number? - P-N-5-9-7... 984 01:09:51.710 --> 01:09:53.653 P-N-5-9-7... 985 01:09:54.495 --> 01:09:57.246 - ...2-K-4-0. - 2-4-K-- 986 01:09:57.409 --> 01:09:59.744 No, 2-K-4-0. 987 01:10:03.906 --> 01:10:06.176 - Oh, my God. - Got it. 988 01:10:06.979 --> 01:10:09.533 Oh, my God, my car! 989 01:10:09.701 --> 01:10:11.523 I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 990 01:10:11.684 --> 01:10:13.725 - I didn't see you there. - What is wrong with you? 991 01:10:13.894 --> 01:10:15.300 What's wrong with me? 992 01:10:15.461 --> 01:10:17.502 You're parked in a handicapped space. 993 01:10:17.670 --> 01:10:20.421 - That's not a handicapped space. - It is now! 994 01:10:20.871 --> 01:10:22.627 Yes! 995 01:10:46.607 --> 01:10:48.712 - What are you doing here? - It's too late. 996 01:10:48.878 --> 01:10:51.531 The account rep's authorizing the CRM-1 1 4 right now. 997 01:10:51.696 --> 01:10:52.908 Oh, man! 998 01:10:56.882 --> 01:11:00.199 Wait a second. He's not going back into the room. 999 01:11:01.395 --> 01:11:03.184 - Where is he going? - I'm gonna go down... 1000 01:11:03.348 --> 01:11:06.513 ...and get this stamped and initialed. You stall him. 1001 01:11:06.868 --> 01:11:08.757 Oh, I hate stalling! 1002 01:11:08.918 --> 01:11:12.333 - Catches my dust. - Traffic congestion. 1003 01:11:16.471 --> 01:11:18.894 Hey, Spence, good to see you again. How you been? 1004 01:11:20.216 --> 01:11:22.453 Well, thank you. 1005 01:11:22.969 --> 01:11:24.399 Will you excuse me for a moment? 1006 01:11:24.569 --> 01:11:26.425 - Of course. - Yeah. 1007 01:11:26.586 --> 01:11:29.882 Say, Dick, I'm probably gonna be arrested for DWI... 1008 01:11:30.043 --> 01:11:32.433 ...so I won't be there when you get out. 1009 01:11:32.764 --> 01:11:35.350 - Can we talk about this later? - Look what I found in his car. 1010 01:11:35.933 --> 01:11:39.895 I don't wish to discuss this in front of the branch employees, that's why. 1011 01:11:41.086 --> 01:11:44.251 Nobody likes to be the bad guy, Bill. But here I am, chopping heads. 1012 01:11:50.593 --> 01:11:53.015 - I already verified-- - I understand the need for layoffs. 1013 01:11:53.186 --> 01:11:54.397 I'm concerned about morale. 1014 01:11:54.563 --> 01:11:56.930 I'm fine, really. Thank you very much. Thank you. 1015 01:11:57.540 --> 01:12:00.322 - Madam, can I have my form back? - What did you just call me? 1016 01:12:00.484 --> 01:12:02.656 I just don't wanna start a bloodbath. 1017 01:12:02.820 --> 01:12:05.406 - Can I have my form back? - Your "forn"? 1018 01:12:05.574 --> 01:12:09.699 - Is that how you spell your name? - Why don't I just do this for you, sir. 1019 01:12:09.863 --> 01:12:11.903 My form. 1020 01:12:13.287 --> 01:12:15.011 You know, there is one bright light here. 1021 01:12:15.177 --> 01:12:17.698 Spencer, the guy with the stampy thing, he's top-drawer. 1022 01:12:17.865 --> 01:12:19.720 Thank you, sir. 1023 01:12:20.457 --> 01:12:21.952 Dick? 1024 01:12:22.121 --> 01:12:23.366 Dick Harper? 1025 01:12:25.932 --> 01:12:27.972 Jack McAllister. 1026 01:12:30.221 --> 01:12:33.538 - You just struck me. - Look what the cat coughed up. 1027 01:12:33.709 --> 01:12:36.907 My gosh, you cut an impressive swath, I'll tell you that. 1028 01:12:37.071 --> 01:12:39.941 - And you smell good too, you devil. - Just hold on a second. 1029 01:12:40.111 --> 01:12:42.119 What do you say we put all this behind us. 1030 01:12:42.288 --> 01:12:45.704 - Dick, what are you doing here? - You know, working, mostly, here... 1031 01:12:45.872 --> 01:12:47.783 ...temporarily, over in Transfers. 1032 01:12:47.954 --> 01:12:50.093 - Okay? Just drop it. - I heard you left town. 1033 01:12:50.259 --> 01:12:54.930 Yeah, I was in Mexico for a while. But mostly I've been working in Transfers. 1034 01:12:55.092 --> 01:12:57.165 - Oh, I see. - Poppycocker. 1035 01:12:57.333 --> 01:12:59.473 I wanted to tell you that you are my inspiration. 1036 01:12:59.637 --> 01:13:01.972 - There's no hard feelings? - You did the best you could. 1037 01:13:02.134 --> 01:13:04.655 - That's all anybody could ask for. - Decent of you to say. 1038 01:13:04.823 --> 01:13:06.350 Like my granddaddy used to tell me-- 1039 01:13:06.519 --> 01:13:07.894 Bye. 1040 01:13:08.183 --> 01:13:09.972 It was so great. We did it! 1041 01:13:10.135 --> 01:13:13.236 Mr. McAllister, please. 1042 01:13:15.162 --> 01:13:17.017 I don't know. I think I made a mistake. 1043 01:13:17.178 --> 01:13:19.088 - Are you kidding? You were great! - No, no, no. 1044 01:13:19.579 --> 01:13:20.562 Here we are, sir. 1045 01:13:20.731 --> 01:13:22.586 Days like this, they make my hands shake. 1046 01:13:22.747 --> 01:13:24.341 - Know what I'm saying? - I can imagine. 1047 01:13:24.892 --> 01:13:27.162 - What's he doing? - I don't know. What is he doing? 1048 01:13:27.870 --> 01:13:30.259 We got one situation here, now, fellas... 1049 01:13:30.430 --> 01:13:32.635 ...which is that that number wrong. 1050 01:13:32.799 --> 01:13:34.141 That's incorrect right there. 1051 01:13:35.936 --> 01:13:38.424 - Did he see us? - I have no idea. 1052 01:13:38.592 --> 01:13:40.284 I think he saw you. 1053 01:13:41.697 --> 01:13:43.607 I think he saw you. 1054 01:13:43.778 --> 01:13:45.567 You were sticking your big head out there. 1055 01:13:45.730 --> 01:13:48.895 I gotta hit the road here, fellas, so I'm gonna sign this for you... 1056 01:13:49.059 --> 01:13:50.782 - ... then you gonna change it. - Yes. 1057 01:13:50.948 --> 01:13:53.796 Oh, man. You know, this is really not the time. 1058 01:13:53.957 --> 01:13:56.608 This is really not the time. Oh, God, he's coming. 1059 01:13:56.774 --> 01:13:58.979 - He's coming, hon. - Okay. 1060 01:14:00.390 --> 01:14:02.692 Jack, hey. It was great seeing you. 1061 01:14:03.175 --> 01:14:05.827 - Where's Frank Bascombe? - Come again? 1062 01:14:06.505 --> 01:14:08.447 You didn't think I'd catch that, now, did you? 1063 01:14:08.809 --> 01:14:11.625 - What do you mean? - Here's what you're gonna do. 1064 01:14:11.786 --> 01:14:14.056 You're gonna turn around and march out of here now. 1065 01:14:14.218 --> 01:14:16.074 You're gonna take Goldilocks there with you. 1066 01:14:16.236 --> 01:14:20.427 And I won't put the two of you in prison for a very long time. 1067 01:14:21.356 --> 01:14:24.139 Actually, honey, I think that sounds pretty good. I think.... 1068 01:14:25.262 --> 01:14:26.823 I think we should take it, you know. 1069 01:14:27.246 --> 01:14:28.807 You think so, hon? 1070 01:14:28.975 --> 01:14:30.153 I do. 1071 01:14:34.160 --> 01:14:36.496 - Because I don't. - Dick Harper. 1072 01:14:37.297 --> 01:14:40.647 I've been terminated, bankrupted, deported and blackmailed... 1073 01:14:40.818 --> 01:14:42.346 ...because of you. 1074 01:14:42.516 --> 01:14:45.680 And I'm not leaving here without your money. 1075 01:14:48.469 --> 01:14:53.041 What you gonna do, Dick? Shoot me if I don't approve that form? 1076 01:14:55.607 --> 01:14:57.462 Write me a check. 1077 01:14:59.927 --> 01:15:03.190 - You are kidding me. - Dick, it's not gonna do us any good. 1078 01:15:03.353 --> 01:15:06.168 He's just gonna cancel it the minute we walk out of here. 1079 01:15:06.330 --> 01:15:08.152 I don't care. 1080 01:15:08.314 --> 01:15:10.038 I don't care. 1081 01:15:10.203 --> 01:15:13.106 I'm not walking out of this bank empty-handed. 1082 01:15:17.341 --> 01:15:20.473 All right. All right, Dick, I'm gonna write you a check. 1083 01:15:20.638 --> 01:15:23.737 - I'm gonna need my hand back. - Gladly. 1084 01:15:25.247 --> 01:15:28.564 All right. Yes, sir. I'm gonna write you that check. 1085 01:15:28.736 --> 01:15:30.908 And what's more, I'm not gonna cancel it. 1086 01:15:31.073 --> 01:15:33.081 Because I think it takes a lot of cojones... 1087 01:15:33.250 --> 01:15:36.797 ...to do what you two have done here today. And I admire that. 1088 01:15:36.962 --> 01:15:38.369 So... 1089 01:15:39.876 --> 01:15:41.501 ...here you go. 1090 01:15:41.892 --> 01:15:45.188 Just a little something to show you what I think you're worth. 1091 01:15:53.031 --> 01:15:55.136 Y'all take care, now. 1092 01:15:59.817 --> 01:16:02.403 Dick, honey... 1093 01:16:03.402 --> 01:16:06.021 ...give me the squirt gun, okay? 1094 01:16:10.860 --> 01:16:13.000 Do you still have McAllister’s form? 1095 01:16:13.901 --> 01:16:15.112 Why? 1096 01:16:18.191 --> 01:16:20.494 Because I just got his signature. 1097 01:16:25.232 --> 01:16:27.305 Weren't you an art major? 1098 01:16:29.233 --> 01:16:32.202 Dick Harper! I had no idea what you were doing. 1099 01:16:32.370 --> 01:16:35.786 I was completely fooled. My God, I didn't know you could act. 1100 01:16:35.955 --> 01:16:38.803 Hon, in 10th grade I played Biff in Death of a Salesman. 1101 01:16:38.964 --> 01:16:40.492 - Come on. - That's just-- 1102 01:16:41.173 --> 01:16:43.345 See the way I got my eyes watering up? 1103 01:16:43.510 --> 01:16:47.123 Yes, sir. It's all right there. 1104 01:16:47.735 --> 01:16:50.102 I am married to a genius. 1105 01:16:50.263 --> 01:16:51.726 It's a turn-on, isn't it? 1106 01:16:51.897 --> 01:16:54.614 - You're a criminal. - I'm a hardened criminal. 1107 01:16:55.641 --> 01:16:59.952 Hon, first we need to talk to Spencer. 1108 01:17:00.731 --> 01:17:02.455 Right. 1109 01:17:08.188 --> 01:17:12.467 Are you in the habit of signing things without looking at them? 1110 01:17:16.447 --> 01:17:18.335 Miss Sheinkopf? 1111 01:17:20.001 --> 01:17:23.068 Miss Sheinkopf, I'm gonna be home by 6. 1112 01:17:36.805 --> 01:17:39.261 - Mr. McAllister! - Jack! 1113 01:17:40.230 --> 01:17:42.369 - Mr. McAllister! - Mr. McAllister! 1114 01:17:42.535 --> 01:17:45.569 We're all waiting for you over here, Jack. Everybody's really pumped. 1115 01:17:45.735 --> 01:17:47.329 Come on! 1116 01:17:47.945 --> 01:17:49.407 Is this some kind of a joke, Dick? 1117 01:17:49.576 --> 01:17:51.300 Are you still trying to get even with me? 1118 01:17:51.466 --> 01:17:53.376 Why would I get even with such a generous man? 1119 01:17:53.546 --> 01:17:56.449 I still can't believe you did that. Jane and I were way off base. 1120 01:17:56.619 --> 01:18:00.002 - He's on in 20, right? Hook him up. - Wait, on what? 1121 01:18:00.172 --> 01:18:01.383 Sam Samuels. MoneyLife. 1122 01:18:01.549 --> 01:18:05.030 Oh, and here are some suggested responses. 1123 01:18:08.719 --> 01:18:10.410 Live to Southern California, where... 1124 01:18:10.576 --> 01:18:13.543 ... in a stunning act of personal generosity, Jack McAllister... 1125 01:18:13.712 --> 01:18:16.101 Who the hell do you think you are? 1126 01:18:16.272 --> 01:18:18.128 I'm your VP of Communications, Jack. 1127 01:18:18.289 --> 01:18:21.071 - -personally funded the defunct corporation's pension fund, 1128 01:18:22.354 --> 01:18:23.762 You said I just did what? 1129 01:18:23.923 --> 01:18:26.859 God, I love this guy, 1130 01:18:27.027 --> 01:18:32.114 But seriously, Jack, what made you do it? 1131 01:18:32.278 --> 01:18:37.014 Well, I-- Sam, I.... 1132 01:18:48.634 --> 01:18:52.344 I realized, Sam, that since the employees of Globodyne... 1133 01:18:52.507 --> 01:18:56.567 ...had given me so much, it was time for me to give back to them. 1134 01:18:56.732 --> 01:19:00.990 So yesterday, I wire-transferred... 1135 01:19:01.150 --> 01:19:02.938 ...$400 million... 1136 01:19:03.711 --> 01:19:06.613 ...into the newly created Globodyne Pension Relief Fund. 1137 01:19:07.808 --> 01:19:09.401 Oh, yeah! 1138 01:19:14.561 --> 01:19:17.464 Let's look at what happened when the first ex-Globodyne employees... 1139 01:19:17.635 --> 01:19:19.490 ... received their shares of money, 1140 01:19:19.651 --> 01:19:22.848 Many people had their life savings invested in the company... 1141 01:19:23.012 --> 01:19:25.860 ...and were delighted to learn their pensions had been returned, 1142 01:19:26.021 --> 01:19:28.356 It is the first time in U, S, corporate history... 1143 01:19:28.518 --> 01:19:32.196 ... that a CEO has personally funded a bankrupted pension plan, 1144 01:19:32.359 --> 01:19:35.174 This incredible gesture won't soon be forgotten by the people... 1145 01:19:35.335 --> 01:19:37.725 ... whose lives it has so dramatically affected, 1146 01:19:37.895 --> 01:19:39.239 And this is just the beginning, 1147 01:19:39.400 --> 01:19:42.183 In the coming months, thousands more will be receiving a check... 1148 01:19:42.345 --> 01:19:45.729 ... for the full value of their lost pensions and life savings, 1149 01:19:47.595 --> 01:19:49.733 Jack, Jack, he's got your back! 1150 01:19:49.932 --> 01:19:52.168 Jack, Jack, he's got your back! 1151 01:19:52.333 --> 01:19:54.405 Jack, Jack, he's got your back! 1152 01:19:54.572 --> 01:19:56.646 You hear that? They love you, Jack. 1153 01:19:56.813 --> 01:19:58.603 - Now, go to hell. - Mr. McAllister... 1154 01:19:58.766 --> 01:20:00.971 ...do you consider yourself a modern-day Robin Hood? 1155 01:20:01.135 --> 01:20:03.982 - Does this mean you're off the hook? - Do you wanna save the whales? 1156 01:20:07.824 --> 01:20:09.483 Now, hang on a minute. 1157 01:20:11.089 --> 01:20:13.261 Have you decided to contribute to the homeless? 1158 01:20:13.426 --> 01:20:15.314 What made you so gracious? 1159 01:20:16.563 --> 01:20:18.703 Mr. McAllister, how do you feel right now? 1160 01:20:18.868 --> 01:20:21.586 Mr. McAllister, how about giving a brother a buck? 1161 01:20:24.501 --> 01:20:27.023 Look at our beautiful family. 1162 01:20:31.767 --> 01:20:33.841 My name is Dick Harper. 1163 01:20:40.827 --> 01:20:44.144 - I agree. - Hey, Harpers, stick them up! 1164 01:20:44.315 --> 01:20:45.843 - Look who it is. - Hey, Garth. 1165 01:20:46.011 --> 01:20:47.287 How you doing, Garth? 1166 01:20:47.452 --> 01:20:49.591 Great. Hey, how do you like the new wheels? 1167 01:20:49.757 --> 01:20:52.058 - Nice. - Hooked up with a new company. 1168 01:20:52.222 --> 01:20:53.749 - Great benefits. - Yeah? 1169 01:20:53.918 --> 01:20:56.253 Yeah. They trade energy. It's called Enron. 1170 01:20:57.918 --> 01:21:59.253 MovieFull-HD.com ~ PertamaX ~