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WEBVTT
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00:00:03.419 --> 00:00:05.354
(GRAND ORCHESTRAL FANFARE
PLAYING)
2
00:00:26.176 --> 00:00:28.110
("SO FRESH, SO CLEAN"
BY OUTKAST PLAYING)
3
00:00:28.112 --> 00:00:31.179
Subtitles by explosiveskull
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00:00:31.181 --> 00:00:33.982
♪ Ain't nobody dope as me
5
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♪ I'm dressed so fresh,
so clean ♪
6
00:00:35.985 --> 00:00:37.785
♪ So fresh
and so clean, clean ♪
7
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♪ Don't you think
I'm so sexy? ♪
8
00:00:39.856 --> 00:00:41.889
♪ I'm dressed so fresh,
so clean... ♪
9
00:00:41.891 --> 00:00:44.425
TEDDY:
<i>Oh, my God!</i>
10
00:00:44.427 --> 00:00:46.427
Come on. Man!
11
00:00:46.429 --> 00:00:47.962
♪ I'm dressed so fresh,
so clean... ♪
12
00:00:47.964 --> 00:00:50.598
(MUTTERS, GROANS)
13
00:00:50.600 --> 00:00:51.999
I don't know this stuff.
14
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That's not even close.
15
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No.
16
00:00:55.504 --> 00:00:57.205
WOMAN:
Teddy! Dinner, baby!
17
00:00:57.207 --> 00:00:59.640
Your father's waiting!
18
00:00:59.642 --> 00:01:03.744
♪ Created in the attic,
we are the coolest mother... ♪
19
00:01:03.746 --> 00:01:05.746
What do you mean,
you're protesting
20
00:01:05.748 --> 00:01:07.514
the State Achievement Test?
21
00:01:07.516 --> 00:01:10.085
Sounds like someone's
unprepared.
22
00:01:10.087 --> 00:01:11.719
- I am prepared.
- Mmm.
23
00:01:11.721 --> 00:01:13.120
To take a stand.
24
00:01:13.122 --> 00:01:14.588
Pops, those standardized tests
25
00:01:14.590 --> 00:01:16.190
are culturally biased.
26
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They want me to calculate
the average number of manatees
27
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that are in Florida.
28
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What does that have to do
29
00:01:21.664 --> 00:01:23.764
with the African-American
experience?
30
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You hear that, Gladys?
31
00:01:25.534 --> 00:01:27.635
We got Minister Louis Farrakhan
at the table.
32
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- (CHUCKLING)
- You know what, Teddy?
33
00:01:29.738 --> 00:01:31.039
The last time I checked,
34
00:01:31.041 --> 00:01:33.474
your twin sister Denise here
is black,
35
00:01:33.476 --> 00:01:36.610
and she pulled a 1500
on the practice test.
36
00:01:36.612 --> 00:01:39.512
- It was actually a 1540, Daddy.
- Ah!
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You go, girl. That's my baby.
(LAUGHING)
38
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Just doing what I do best...
outshining Teddy's butt.
39
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(DENISE LAUGHING)
40
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What's this really all about,
Teddy Bear?
41
00:01:48.925 --> 00:01:50.059
Hmm?
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Do you need help?
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Is that what this is all about?
44
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I don't know, Mommy.
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I mean...
46
00:02:02.038 --> 00:02:04.206
maybe I do need help.
47
00:02:06.075 --> 00:02:08.742
Help yourself
to the goddamn study book.
48
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Hell, you get 400 points
just for signing your name.
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You do know how to spell
your name, don't you?
50
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- T-H-E... What?
- (IMITATING BUZZER)
51
00:02:16.285 --> 00:02:17.583
You're wrong.
52
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Ain't no "H" in my name.
53
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She's spelling your legal name.
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"Theodore."
55
00:02:26.195 --> 00:02:28.528
Well, there goes
those 400 points.
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She like a Chinese boy
at school.
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FATHER:
Shut your pie hole!
58
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("EYE OF THE TIGER"
BY SURVIVOR PLAYING)
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Everyone take a seat.
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00:02:45.948 --> 00:02:49.051
(WHISPERING):
T-H-E...
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(GRUNTING MELODY
OF "EYE OF THE TIGER")
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Don't even look at him.
Stewart's an asshole.
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Okay, students, please break
the seal on your test books
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00:03:04.966 --> 00:03:06.102
and begin.
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♪
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(GRUNTS)
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(GRUNTS)
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(GRUNTING)
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(GRUNTS, SHOUTS)
70
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Done.
71
00:03:39.167 --> 00:03:40.733
You finished the whole test?
72
00:03:40.735 --> 00:03:42.302
No, I'm done with this.
73
00:03:42.304 --> 00:03:44.071
I'm finished!
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00:03:44.073 --> 00:03:45.772
Do I look like a sheep
to you, Marv?
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00:03:45.774 --> 00:03:47.207
No.
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You all can continue
to be sheep.
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00:03:49.010 --> 00:03:50.643
I'm not gonna be
nobody's sheep.
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00:03:50.645 --> 00:03:51.711
Mr. Walker.
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(BLEATING)
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- (LAUGHS)
- I don't know how
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00:03:55.051 --> 00:03:57.217
to make the noise, but you know
what I'm trying to say.
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00:03:57.219 --> 00:03:58.718
Y'all can keep falling
for the...
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00:03:58.720 --> 00:04:00.753
for the man's plan
if you want to,
84
00:04:00.755 --> 00:04:03.222
but y'all gonna end up
in stupid student debt.
85
00:04:03.224 --> 00:04:05.091
You look like bad credit
already.
86
00:04:05.093 --> 00:04:06.794
- (LAUGHING)
- This whole section right here
87
00:04:06.796 --> 00:04:10.663
reeks of Discover cards,
with your broke ass.
88
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I'm gonna be a winner.
I'm gonna succeed
89
00:04:12.368 --> 00:04:15.368
in the school of life,
doing real stuff.
90
00:04:15.370 --> 00:04:17.103
I'm gonna get me
a real fly car,
91
00:04:17.105 --> 00:04:18.872
and I'm gonna have me
a nice girl.
92
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Y'all ain't gonna make it.
93
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Ted, get out!
94
00:04:21.676 --> 00:04:22.975
Denise got hair on her titties.
95
00:04:22.977 --> 00:04:24.210
- (GASPING)
- Cat's out of the bag.
96
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Get out!
You're embarrassing us!
97
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TEDDY:
Y'all some sheep!
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Y'all sheep!
99
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In your face!
100
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Ha-ha, stupid.
101
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Now I'm gonna be rolling
in the dough.
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- (LAUGHS)
- (TEDDY BLEATING)
103
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And by the way, Denise...
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I think Denise
has incredible titties.
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Marv, shut up!
106
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♪ Hey, Jim, you know
them old sugar daddies ♪
107
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♪ They be trickin',
they tell them girls ♪
108
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♪ I said you could have
109
00:04:44.400 --> 00:04:45.998
♪ Whatever you like,
if you like ♪
110
00:04:46.000 --> 00:04:47.334
♪ I said you could have
111
00:04:47.336 --> 00:04:49.368
♪ Whatever you like,
if you like ♪
112
00:04:49.370 --> 00:04:51.771
♪ Yeah, yeah, stacks on deck
113
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♪ Patrón on ice
114
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♪ And we can pop bottles
all night ♪
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♪ And, baby, you could have
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♪ Whatever you like,
if you like ♪
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♪ I said you could have
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♪ Whatever you like,
if you like ♪
119
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♪ Yeah, baby, I could treat you
so special, so nice ♪
120
00:05:06.988 --> 00:05:09.188
♪ Gas up a jet for you tonight
and, baby, you could go ♪
121
00:05:09.190 --> 00:05:11.791
♪ Wherever you like,
if you like ♪
122
00:05:11.793 --> 00:05:13.226
♪ I said you could have
123
00:05:13.228 --> 00:05:15.729
♪ Whatever you like,
if you like, yeah ♪
124
00:05:17.198 --> 00:05:19.466
♪ Any time you want to,
pick up the telephone ♪
125
00:05:19.468 --> 00:05:22.101
♪ You know it ain't nothin'
to drop a couple stacks... ♪
126
00:05:22.103 --> 00:05:24.403
This project
has taken over my life.
127
00:05:24.405 --> 00:05:26.805
- Come on.
- God, I can't wait to sleep.
128
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Come here.
129
00:05:27.976 --> 00:05:29.708
- Thank you, baby.
- No problem.
130
00:05:29.710 --> 00:05:32.278
Oh, I'm so nervous
about tonight.
131
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Thank God you're coming.
132
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Why are you nervous?
133
00:05:35.116 --> 00:05:36.382
Lis, you did an amazing job.
134
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You're gonna kill this.
135
00:05:37.285 --> 00:05:39.751
Gonna be the hottest spot
in Atlanta.
136
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(SIGHS) Okay.
137
00:05:40.954 --> 00:05:44.023
Will, uh...
will the lovely Maya
138
00:05:44.025 --> 00:05:45.758
be joining us
this evening as well?
139
00:05:45.760 --> 00:05:47.493
I don't like him.
140
00:05:47.495 --> 00:05:49.162
Chef Clemont
invited my entire team
141
00:05:49.164 --> 00:05:51.130
to dinner tonight,
so be nice, okay?
142
00:05:51.132 --> 00:05:53.199
- Yes.
- Maybe try to compliment her.
143
00:05:53.201 --> 00:05:55.268
- Okay.
- Love you.
144
00:05:55.270 --> 00:05:57.303
- Okay. Bye.
- Love you. Have a good day.
145
00:05:57.305 --> 00:05:58.471
Hey, Maya!
146
00:05:58.473 --> 00:06:00.406
Hey, Teddy.
147
00:06:00.408 --> 00:06:02.275
Somebody looks
extremely attractive today.
148
00:06:02.277 --> 00:06:03.842
Thank you.
149
00:06:03.844 --> 00:06:05.478
Not that I'm looking at you
the same way
150
00:06:05.480 --> 00:06:07.481
I look at my woman,
because I wouldn't do that.
151
00:06:07.483 --> 00:06:09.382
Let's just go. Let's go.
152
00:06:09.384 --> 00:06:11.783
- I love the weave!
- Teddy!
153
00:06:11.785 --> 00:06:13.519
Or the wig. Whichever...
154
00:06:13.521 --> 00:06:14.819
This is my hair.
155
00:06:14.821 --> 00:06:16.188
- You did that, boo.
- Stop.
156
00:06:16.190 --> 00:06:17.822
I'm just going to stop.
157
00:06:17.824 --> 00:06:18.991
You get what I'm trying to do.
158
00:06:18.993 --> 00:06:19.992
He's jealous of your beauty.
159
00:06:19.994 --> 00:06:21.294
I blew it.
160
00:06:21.296 --> 00:06:22.997
I definitely blew that.
161
00:06:24.898 --> 00:06:27.233
♪ I got a new spring
in my step... ♪
162
00:06:27.235 --> 00:06:28.367
- Oh, look, there's Teddy.
- (HORN HONKS)
163
00:06:28.369 --> 00:06:29.834
- Teddy!
- Yo, Teddy!
164
00:06:29.836 --> 00:06:31.971
♪ It's looking pretty good
165
00:06:31.973 --> 00:06:34.173
♪ Up ahead...
166
00:06:34.175 --> 00:06:36.142
My name is Teddy,
and I am here to make
167
00:06:36.144 --> 00:06:37.443
your barbecue dreams come true.
168
00:06:37.445 --> 00:06:39.445
Now, Esther,
you're a small woman,
169
00:06:39.447 --> 00:06:41.179
but I know you have
a big heart,
170
00:06:41.181 --> 00:06:43.516
which is why I recommend
the Big Steel for you.
171
00:06:43.518 --> 00:06:45.551
Not a lot of women
can take this much steel,
172
00:06:45.553 --> 00:06:46.986
- but I know you can.
- Mmm!
173
00:06:46.988 --> 00:06:49.087
The Pitbull, huh?
174
00:06:49.089 --> 00:06:51.122
<i>¿Como te llamas?
Me llamo Pitbull.</i>
175
00:06:51.124 --> 00:06:53.525
<i>¡Dale!</i> (CHUCKLES)
176
00:06:53.527 --> 00:06:55.194
You're not Spanish, are you?
177
00:06:55.196 --> 00:06:57.129
I can see it in your eyes,
Morris.
178
00:06:57.131 --> 00:06:58.531
But I can also tell
that your wife...
179
00:06:58.533 --> 00:07:00.168
you know, your wife
isn't on the same page.
180
00:07:01.536 --> 00:07:03.268
I mean, it's not
like she completely
181
00:07:03.270 --> 00:07:04.869
controls the purse strings.
182
00:07:04.871 --> 00:07:07.106
(CAR HORN HONKING)
183
00:07:07.108 --> 00:07:09.075
Enjoy it.
184
00:07:09.077 --> 00:07:11.009
Don't you let me down.
185
00:07:11.011 --> 00:07:12.210
(CLAPPING)
186
00:07:12.212 --> 00:07:13.346
(LAUGHS)
187
00:07:13.348 --> 00:07:15.347
You better stop it, man.
188
00:07:15.349 --> 00:07:16.381
Don't you start that.
189
00:07:16.383 --> 00:07:18.050
That was a master class.
190
00:07:18.052 --> 00:07:20.019
I couldn't get Bobby Flay
to buy that beast.
191
00:07:20.021 --> 00:07:22.087
You know what?
Once I saw the man purse,
192
00:07:22.089 --> 00:07:24.089
the guy was putty in my hands.
He really was.
193
00:07:24.091 --> 00:07:25.123
(BOTH LAUGHING)
194
00:07:25.125 --> 00:07:26.925
Teddy, I just want you to know
195
00:07:26.927 --> 00:07:29.361
you are like the son
I never had.
196
00:07:29.363 --> 00:07:31.399
Well, I mean, come on,
you got Joe Junior.
197
00:07:33.501 --> 00:07:35.368
Well, yeah,
but he's the son I do have,
198
00:07:35.370 --> 00:07:37.570
and I'm just not
all that crazy about it.
199
00:07:37.572 --> 00:07:39.237
I mean, look at him.
200
00:07:39.239 --> 00:07:42.141
But my point is this...
all those years ago,
201
00:07:42.143 --> 00:07:44.610
I took a chance
on a pimply-faced teenager.
202
00:07:44.612 --> 00:07:47.212
My little Gary Coleman.
203
00:07:47.214 --> 00:07:48.614
My little Webster.
204
00:07:48.616 --> 00:07:52.050
And it turned out great
for both of us.
205
00:07:52.052 --> 00:07:55.123
So I've decided,
when I retire...
206
00:07:56.491 --> 00:07:58.591
I'm turning Barbecue City...
207
00:07:58.593 --> 00:08:01.926
over... to you.
208
00:08:01.928 --> 00:08:03.595
Excuse me?
209
00:08:03.597 --> 00:08:05.330
- What?
- (CHUCKLING)
210
00:08:05.332 --> 00:08:07.233
Uh, don't-don't shit me.
211
00:08:07.235 --> 00:08:08.334
I'm serious.
212
00:08:08.336 --> 00:08:10.001
Oh, my God, Joe.
213
00:08:10.003 --> 00:08:11.403
I just got-got goose bumps.
214
00:08:11.405 --> 00:08:13.872
- Yes!
- I got goose bumps all over.
215
00:08:13.874 --> 00:08:15.373
I don't know what to say, man.
Thank you.
216
00:08:15.375 --> 00:08:17.108
No. Thank you...
217
00:08:17.110 --> 00:08:18.477
son.
218
00:08:18.479 --> 00:08:20.646
What you talkin' 'bout, Joe?
219
00:08:20.648 --> 00:08:22.881
- (LAUGHING)
- You gotta come here, Mr. Drummond.
220
00:08:22.883 --> 00:08:23.917
Come here.
221
00:08:25.118 --> 00:08:27.054
JOE:
All yours, Teddy.
222
00:08:28.455 --> 00:08:29.988
- What do you think?
- Oh...
223
00:08:29.990 --> 00:08:31.590
(CHUCKLES) It's amazing.
224
00:08:31.592 --> 00:08:32.525
- Really?
- Yeah.
225
00:08:32.527 --> 00:08:34.993
But as your unofficial
financial advisor,
226
00:08:34.995 --> 00:08:36.294
I'm obligated to tell you
227
00:08:36.296 --> 00:08:38.296
that this ring is way out
of your budget.
228
00:08:38.298 --> 00:08:39.564
Relax.
229
00:08:39.566 --> 00:08:40.598
Lisa's cool as hell.
230
00:08:40.600 --> 00:08:42.000
She knows who you are.
231
00:08:42.002 --> 00:08:43.636
Lisa does not know who I am.
232
00:08:43.638 --> 00:08:46.338
Lisa knows that I'm
a successful barbecue salesman.
233
00:08:46.340 --> 00:08:48.173
Marvin knows that Teddy's
a high school dropout
234
00:08:48.175 --> 00:08:50.208
that's living
paycheck to paycheck
235
00:08:50.210 --> 00:08:52.243
'cause I'm with a woman that's
way above my weight class.
236
00:08:52.245 --> 00:08:54.613
Your life is built
on a financial house of cards.
237
00:08:54.615 --> 00:08:56.649
- Stop it.
- The Porsche, the duplex.
238
00:08:56.651 --> 00:08:58.684
What are you trying to prove?
239
00:08:58.686 --> 00:09:00.185
Plus, every single time
we go out,
240
00:09:00.187 --> 00:09:01.553
she offers to pay
for the check.
241
00:09:01.555 --> 00:09:03.254
The day that I let her
put down her plastic
242
00:09:03.256 --> 00:09:04.422
is the day that I lose her.
243
00:09:04.424 --> 00:09:06.692
- And you know that.
- I don't know why I was so nervous.
244
00:09:06.694 --> 00:09:08.093
- LISA: It's coming together.
- Hey.
245
00:09:08.095 --> 00:09:09.627
- Hi.
- Lisa.
246
00:09:09.629 --> 00:09:11.463
- Hi!
- <i>Bienvenue.</i>
247
00:09:11.465 --> 00:09:14.366
Dude, Lisa's the best thing
that ever happened to me.
248
00:09:14.368 --> 00:09:17.134
I don't want to mess
this one up, man.
249
00:09:17.136 --> 00:09:19.003
- (LAUGHING): I told them.
- He did.
250
00:09:19.005 --> 00:09:20.271
- (LAUGHTER)
- He actually said that.
251
00:09:20.273 --> 00:09:21.706
- Ooh.
- Look at that.
252
00:09:21.708 --> 00:09:23.041
- That looks amazing.
- Some dessert.
253
00:09:23.043 --> 00:09:24.242
- Wow.
- Wow. Thank you.
254
00:09:24.244 --> 00:09:26.211
- Mmm. - Thank you so much.
- WAITER: Chef Clemont also said
255
00:09:26.213 --> 00:09:27.412
that there will be no check.
256
00:09:27.414 --> 00:09:29.647
This is all on him.
257
00:09:29.649 --> 00:09:31.516
- Wow.
- LISA: I knew he would try this.
258
00:09:31.518 --> 00:09:33.518
You know what?
Tell him I appreciate it,
259
00:09:33.520 --> 00:09:35.120
- but I insist on paying.
- Okay.
260
00:09:35.122 --> 00:09:36.454
- Yeah.
- Okay, well, just wait.
261
00:09:36.456 --> 00:09:38.323
Well, hold on, now, honey.
262
00:09:38.325 --> 00:09:39.457
Honey, you don't want
to offend him.
263
00:09:39.459 --> 00:09:41.058
You're his guest, right?
264
00:09:41.060 --> 00:09:42.527
Trust me, you never take
a free meal from a client.
265
00:09:42.529 --> 00:09:43.661
That way,
you don't owe them anything.
266
00:09:43.663 --> 00:09:45.263
- That's true.
- Thank you, Lisa.
267
00:09:45.265 --> 00:09:46.364
- I appreciate it.
- You know.
268
00:09:46.366 --> 00:09:47.532
- Um...
- WAITER: Whenever you're ready.
269
00:09:47.534 --> 00:09:49.066
LISA:
Thank you.
270
00:09:49.068 --> 00:09:50.635
You know what?
You know what, then, baby?
271
00:09:50.637 --> 00:09:52.136
If that's the case,
sweetie, then let me...
272
00:09:52.138 --> 00:09:53.504
No. Baby, this is my thing.
273
00:09:53.506 --> 00:09:55.340
There's like eight of us.
I got it.
274
00:09:55.342 --> 00:09:57.142
- You can probably write it off, right?
- Yes.
275
00:09:57.144 --> 00:09:59.344
I didn't think about that.
It is a business expense.
276
00:09:59.346 --> 00:10:00.612
- Okay. - LISA: Yeah.
- Come on.
277
00:10:00.614 --> 00:10:02.045
MAYA: W-W-Wait, wait.
Hold-hold up, Lis.
278
00:10:02.047 --> 00:10:04.448
It is a business expense,
but, Lis...
279
00:10:04.450 --> 00:10:06.418
it's clear that Teddy
really wants to treat.
280
00:10:06.420 --> 00:10:10.188
We're all here celebrating you,
so let him.
281
00:10:10.190 --> 00:10:11.489
(TEDDY SIGHS QUIETLY)
282
00:10:11.491 --> 00:10:13.223
Right, Teddy?
283
00:10:13.225 --> 00:10:14.692
(CHUCKLES) Yes.
284
00:10:14.694 --> 00:10:15.760
Wow.
285
00:10:15.762 --> 00:10:18.530
Yes. Wh-Why aren't we closer?
286
00:10:18.532 --> 00:10:19.764
- 'Cause you get me.
- (CHUCKLES) Mmm.
287
00:10:19.766 --> 00:10:21.433
I have it. I got it.
288
00:10:21.435 --> 00:10:22.634
- I love you.
- Love you back.
289
00:10:22.636 --> 00:10:24.001
Black love.
290
00:10:24.003 --> 00:10:25.369
TEDDY:
Okay.
291
00:10:25.371 --> 00:10:27.237
Oh, shit.
292
00:10:27.239 --> 00:10:28.405
All right, Marvin, hit me.
293
00:10:28.407 --> 00:10:29.641
Thank you.
294
00:10:29.643 --> 00:10:31.743
- This is so good.
- One of my favorite things that he does.
295
00:10:31.745 --> 00:10:33.478
- That caramel tart, he's known for it.
- TEDDY: All right.
296
00:10:33.480 --> 00:10:35.447
Oh, I gotta get in that.
297
00:10:35.449 --> 00:10:37.181
Definitely gonna try that.
298
00:10:37.183 --> 00:10:38.248
Uh-uh.
299
00:10:38.250 --> 00:10:39.751
- MAYA: So amazing.
- LISA: Aren't these beautiful?
300
00:10:39.753 --> 00:10:41.452
- He did these just for us.
- Really?
301
00:10:41.454 --> 00:10:43.121
Yeah.
You should try this caramel.
302
00:10:43.123 --> 00:10:44.255
I'm gonna... I'm gonna take
a little bit of it.
303
00:10:44.257 --> 00:10:46.591
- Get in there.
- Take me through... take me through...
304
00:10:46.593 --> 00:10:48.158
Lisa, take me through.
So this is a chair.
305
00:10:48.160 --> 00:10:49.293
Straight up, it's a chair.
306
00:10:49.295 --> 00:10:51.061
I know that much, but what...
tell me about... give me
307
00:10:51.063 --> 00:10:52.029
the <i>Behind the Music</i>
about the chair.
308
00:10:52.031 --> 00:10:53.263
Pretend I'm on VH1
or something like that.
309
00:10:53.265 --> 00:10:55.400
Well, actually, these chairs
have a very interesting story.
310
00:10:55.402 --> 00:10:56.768
They're from Denmark.
311
00:10:56.770 --> 00:10:58.770
- Found them in a warehouse.
- MARVIN: Whoa.
312
00:10:58.772 --> 00:11:01.438
Mid-century, modern,
kind of rounded.
313
00:11:01.440 --> 00:11:02.372
- MARVIN: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- (GROANS QUIETLY)
314
00:11:02.374 --> 00:11:03.574
- I know it's blue and...
- (PLUCKING SOUND)
315
00:11:03.576 --> 00:11:05.476
- LISA: I didn't know you were so into chairs.
- (GRUNTS)
316
00:11:05.478 --> 00:11:06.578
Oh, you would not believe...
I'll go home,
317
00:11:06.580 --> 00:11:07.779
I'll look at my chair,
I get turned on in a second.
318
00:11:07.781 --> 00:11:09.814
- It's just a weird fetish.
- You would love these because...
319
00:11:09.816 --> 00:11:12.282
I don't know if you noticed
the cerulean kind of
320
00:11:12.284 --> 00:11:13.617
- undertone of the wallpaper...
- Woof.
321
00:11:13.619 --> 00:11:16.220
...but we kind of wanted
to tie it all together,
322
00:11:16.222 --> 00:11:18.089
to kind of offset the harder,
more straighter lines,
323
00:11:18.091 --> 00:11:19.624
- and...
- What is that? I...
324
00:11:19.626 --> 00:11:21.559
I found this fabric in Italy.
It's 100%...
325
00:11:21.561 --> 00:11:23.160
Oh, my God.
326
00:11:23.162 --> 00:11:23.962
(CHUCKLES)
327
00:11:23.964 --> 00:11:25.797
- Oh, my God!
- (UTENSILS DROPPING)
328
00:11:25.799 --> 00:11:28.065
- No, no, no!
- What?
329
00:11:28.067 --> 00:11:29.801
Is there a problem
with the dessert, sir?
330
00:11:29.803 --> 00:11:31.503
I think that's pubic hair
in the cake.
331
00:11:31.505 --> 00:11:33.070
- MARVIN: Oh, my God.
- LISA: Oh, my gosh.
332
00:11:33.072 --> 00:11:34.505
Is this pubic hair
in my damn dessert?
333
00:11:34.507 --> 00:11:35.341
May I?
334
00:11:37.343 --> 00:11:39.376
- I'm sorry, what?
- May I please take it?
335
00:11:39.378 --> 00:11:41.178
Literally,
I'm telling you what it is.
336
00:11:41.180 --> 00:11:42.114
Uh...
337
00:11:48.087 --> 00:11:50.122
This is way too many pubes.
338
00:11:51.156 --> 00:11:52.256
What does that mean?
339
00:11:52.258 --> 00:11:53.625
I mean, one is too many pubes.
340
00:11:53.627 --> 00:11:55.158
If you could tell the chef.
341
00:11:55.160 --> 00:11:56.628
Thank you. Thank you for
taking care of this for us.
342
00:11:56.630 --> 00:11:58.529
I believe you planted these.
343
00:11:58.531 --> 00:12:00.764
- (LISA GASPS) - No, no, no.
- What'd you just say?
344
00:12:00.766 --> 00:12:02.599
MARVIN: Stop. I got this.
That's insane of you.
345
00:12:02.601 --> 00:12:04.368
I've known this man
my entire life.
346
00:12:04.370 --> 00:12:06.504
- He's not a pube planter, sir.
- TEDDY: No, no, no.
347
00:12:06.506 --> 00:12:08.539
Stop, Marv. Stop.
Maybe you planted them.
348
00:12:08.541 --> 00:12:10.107
- What?
- Boom.
349
00:12:10.109 --> 00:12:11.675
I risked my life
coming to this country
350
00:12:11.677 --> 00:12:13.644
so I can plant pubes on
some random guy's cheesecake?
351
00:12:13.646 --> 00:12:15.212
I don't know
what you're into, man.
352
00:12:15.214 --> 00:12:16.880
And I have a flash of news
for you, guy.
353
00:12:16.882 --> 00:12:19.416
- I man-scape down here.
- TEDDY: Okay.
354
00:12:19.418 --> 00:12:21.418
That's my woman, and that's
too much information.
355
00:12:21.420 --> 00:12:23.654
And these are the pubes
356
00:12:23.656 --> 00:12:25.656
of an African-American guy.
357
00:12:25.658 --> 00:12:28.224
- MARVIN: Oh, shit.
- What? That's racist, man.
358
00:12:28.226 --> 00:12:29.459
It's descriptive.
359
00:12:29.461 --> 00:12:31.395
- "Descriptive," my ass. That's racist.
- Luis?
360
00:12:31.397 --> 00:12:33.730
That's what they are...
Afro pubes.
361
00:12:33.732 --> 00:12:34.731
Friends, friends,
what is happening?
362
00:12:34.733 --> 00:12:35.732
What is happening?
363
00:12:35.734 --> 00:12:37.167
Pubes and racism.
364
00:12:37.169 --> 00:12:38.368
TEDDY:
Chef Clemont...
365
00:12:38.370 --> 00:12:40.269
(SPEAKS FRENCH)
366
00:12:40.271 --> 00:12:41.404
- Mm-hmm.
- All right? I go to take
367
00:12:41.406 --> 00:12:42.539
a bite of my cheesecake.
368
00:12:42.541 --> 00:12:44.341
There's what appears
to be pubic hair
369
00:12:44.343 --> 00:12:45.442
in my cake.
370
00:12:45.444 --> 00:12:46.677
That he planted with his
371
00:12:46.679 --> 00:12:48.712
African-American
short-and-curlies.
372
00:12:48.714 --> 00:12:49.646
Say "African-American" again,
373
00:12:49.648 --> 00:12:51.515
and I'm-a get dark
and curly in your ass!
374
00:12:51.517 --> 00:12:53.517
- I will say it again!
- All right, say it again!
375
00:12:53.519 --> 00:12:55.385
(CLAMORING)
376
00:12:55.387 --> 00:12:56.888
CLEMONT:
Please, everyone, calm down.
377
00:12:56.890 --> 00:12:59.156
I am mortified by this.
I am so sorry here, everyone.
378
00:12:59.158 --> 00:13:01.358
- Uh, the meal is on me.
- LUIS: No.
379
00:13:01.360 --> 00:13:02.593
This is what he wants.
380
00:13:02.595 --> 00:13:04.561
- Luis, I need to speak to you in the kitchen.
- Thank you.
381
00:13:04.563 --> 00:13:05.562
Go in the kitchen, man.
382
00:13:05.564 --> 00:13:06.864
You're going to die.
383
00:13:06.866 --> 00:13:08.699
Luis, I need to speak to you
in the kitchen.
384
00:13:08.701 --> 00:13:10.233
You messed with the wrong guy.
385
00:13:10.235 --> 00:13:11.435
CLEMONT:
Luis, right now.
386
00:13:11.437 --> 00:13:12.669
- Right now.
- You better go.
387
00:13:12.671 --> 00:13:13.704
Okay, baby, just...
388
00:13:13.706 --> 00:13:14.938
You better go!
389
00:13:14.940 --> 00:13:16.840
- Gotta be kidding me.
- LUIS: Chef, please,
390
00:13:16.842 --> 00:13:19.209
- he's been...
- I, uh... I don't want to get into it.
391
00:13:19.211 --> 00:13:21.612
Feel like it's a cloud
of racism around me.
392
00:13:21.614 --> 00:13:23.447
- (CRICKETS CHIRPING)
- (LISA SIGHS)
393
00:13:23.449 --> 00:13:24.848
Teddy, what is going on?
394
00:13:24.850 --> 00:13:26.516
Haven't we had
enough surprises tonight?
395
00:13:26.518 --> 00:13:28.517
Well, I promise you
396
00:13:28.519 --> 00:13:31.254
that this one
will be worth it, okay?
397
00:13:31.256 --> 00:13:32.623
Oh, my God.
398
00:13:32.625 --> 00:13:34.458
What's all this?
399
00:13:34.460 --> 00:13:37.628
Well, I will tell you
what's going on.
400
00:13:37.630 --> 00:13:39.395
So, listen to this.
401
00:13:39.397 --> 00:13:42.332
Joe told me today
that when he retires
402
00:13:42.334 --> 00:13:44.234
he's leaving all of this to me.
403
00:13:44.236 --> 00:13:46.803
- Baby, that's amazing.
- I mean, it's life-changing.
404
00:13:46.805 --> 00:13:49.271
- Yeah.
- And maybe you could
405
00:13:49.273 --> 00:13:51.574
put your touch on this place,
change the design,
406
00:13:51.576 --> 00:13:53.342
help take it to the next level?
407
00:13:53.344 --> 00:13:54.745
I'm so proud of you. Yeah.
408
00:13:54.747 --> 00:13:55.946
- Maybe we expand?
- Yes.
409
00:13:55.948 --> 00:13:57.381
- Franchise, even?
- Yeah.
410
00:13:57.383 --> 00:13:58.682
Yes. Oh, yeah.
411
00:13:58.684 --> 00:14:00.383
Baby, we-we could do a lot
with this place.
412
00:14:00.385 --> 00:14:01.685
First of all,
we could change the logo.
413
00:14:01.687 --> 00:14:03.887
"Barbecue Nation."
"Barbecue Safari."
414
00:14:03.889 --> 00:14:05.622
I mean, there are
so many things we could do.
415
00:14:05.624 --> 00:14:06.990
Honestly, I have so many ideas.
416
00:14:06.992 --> 00:14:08.159
- (TEDDY CLEARS THROAT)
- I...
417
00:14:10.429 --> 00:14:12.328
I just know that with you
by my side,
418
00:14:12.330 --> 00:14:13.699
that anything is possible.
419
00:14:17.235 --> 00:14:18.268
(GASPS)
420
00:14:18.270 --> 00:14:20.372
Oh, my God.
421
00:14:23.241 --> 00:14:24.642
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
422
00:14:26.678 --> 00:14:28.878
- Yes.
- Yes?
423
00:14:28.880 --> 00:14:30.947
- (LAUGHING): Yes! Yes!
- (CHUCKLING): Yes?
424
00:14:30.949 --> 00:14:32.716
- (TEDDY GRUNTS)
- LISA: Mmm.
425
00:14:32.718 --> 00:14:34.519
BOTH:
Mmm, mmm.
426
00:14:35.620 --> 00:14:36.787
Wait, the ring. Here.
427
00:14:36.789 --> 00:14:38.254
You gotta put the...
put the ring on.
428
00:14:38.256 --> 00:14:39.522
Oh, my God.
429
00:14:39.524 --> 00:14:41.892
- I love it.
- Let's celebrate, then.
430
00:14:41.894 --> 00:14:44.326
- Huh? You know I had to get some champagne.
- Oh, my God.
431
00:14:44.328 --> 00:14:46.328
I said, "Look, uh, my baby
gonna like it."
432
00:14:46.330 --> 00:14:47.764
- (GAS HISSING)
- (LISA CHUCKLING)
433
00:14:47.766 --> 00:14:49.732
TEDDY: Let me pour some
champagne for my fiancée.
434
00:14:49.734 --> 00:14:51.300
LISA:
"Fiancée."
435
00:14:51.302 --> 00:14:52.968
TEDDY:
All right, let's make a toast.
436
00:14:52.970 --> 00:14:55.507
- To us.
- To us.
437
00:14:56.508 --> 00:14:58.309
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
438
00:14:59.444 --> 00:15:00.676
(TEDDY SIGHS, SNIFFS)
439
00:15:00.678 --> 00:15:01.877
- Baby?
- Hmm?
440
00:15:01.879 --> 00:15:03.045
Do you smell gas?
441
00:15:03.047 --> 00:15:04.647
I was nervous, babe.
442
00:15:04.649 --> 00:15:06.750
I didn't know you'd smell it.
I tried to...
443
00:15:06.752 --> 00:15:08.417
No, that's, um...
444
00:15:08.419 --> 00:15:10.352
Actual... like, the propane?
445
00:15:10.354 --> 00:15:11.487
Why don't you go stand outside,
446
00:15:11.489 --> 00:15:13.789
I'll situate everything
in here, and I'll get you home.
447
00:15:13.791 --> 00:15:14.957
- Okay.
- Love you.
448
00:15:14.959 --> 00:15:16.325
Be ready.
449
00:15:16.327 --> 00:15:17.561
TEDDY:
Mm-hmm.
450
00:15:17.563 --> 00:15:19.295
LISA:
<i>So, guys...</i>
451
00:15:19.297 --> 00:15:22.800
my sweet little Teddy Bear
just popped the question.
452
00:15:25.703 --> 00:15:26.802
(BLOWS)
453
00:15:26.804 --> 00:15:27.972
And big surprise...
454
00:15:29.373 --> 00:15:30.807
(SIGHS)
455
00:15:30.809 --> 00:15:32.776
I said yes!
456
00:15:32.778 --> 00:15:34.543
- (ELECTRICAL BUZZING)
- Shit!
457
00:15:34.545 --> 00:15:36.514
(TEDDY SCREAMING)
458
00:15:39.517 --> 00:15:40.716
- (GASPS)
- (TEDDY GROANING)
459
00:15:40.718 --> 00:15:43.720
Oh, shit. Oh, shit!
460
00:15:43.722 --> 00:15:45.554
Oh, God! Baby.
461
00:15:45.556 --> 00:15:47.792
(SCREAMS, WHIMPERS)
462
00:15:48.960 --> 00:15:50.392
Teddy, are you okay?
463
00:15:50.394 --> 00:15:53.429
I need you to tell
my fiancée there's...
464
00:15:53.431 --> 00:15:54.998
there's been an accident.
465
00:15:55.000 --> 00:15:56.933
Baby, it's me.
466
00:15:56.935 --> 00:15:59.635
- (WHIMPERS)
- Can you see me? Teddy?
467
00:15:59.637 --> 00:16:01.537
I'm your fiancée.
468
00:16:01.539 --> 00:16:02.905
Good.
469
00:16:02.907 --> 00:16:04.874
I've been in an accident.
470
00:16:04.876 --> 00:16:06.076
Oh, baby.
471
00:16:06.078 --> 00:16:08.346
(GROANING)
472
00:16:09.914 --> 00:16:12.481
MARVIN:
<i>So, Joe didn't have insurance?</i>
473
00:16:12.483 --> 00:16:14.016
Yeah, of course he did, Marv.
474
00:16:14.018 --> 00:16:16.118
He took the money
and ran off to Florida.
475
00:16:16.120 --> 00:16:18.487
Dude, I've been looking
for a job everywhere, man.
476
00:16:18.489 --> 00:16:20.689
But there are no
decent sales jobs for
477
00:16:20.691 --> 00:16:22.491
an Employee of the Month
at Barbecue City.
478
00:16:22.493 --> 00:16:24.827
We'd hire you here,
but you need to get your GED.
479
00:16:24.829 --> 00:16:27.462
Think about it.
These guys bullshit clients
480
00:16:27.464 --> 00:16:29.698
all day about funds
they don't understand.
481
00:16:29.700 --> 00:16:30.533
You would be a natural.
482
00:16:30.535 --> 00:16:31.801
So you're saying
that if I graduated
483
00:16:31.803 --> 00:16:34.570
- from high school, that then you could get me a job here?
- Yeah.
484
00:16:34.572 --> 00:16:36.872
But you hate school,
so why are we even having
485
00:16:36.874 --> 00:16:38.741
- this conversation?
- No, no, no. I'm not talking
486
00:16:38.743 --> 00:16:39.975
about going to school.
487
00:16:39.977 --> 00:16:41.610
I'm talking about
getting my GED.
488
00:16:41.612 --> 00:16:42.845
And that's different.
489
00:16:42.847 --> 00:16:44.080
See, to get my GED,
490
00:16:44.082 --> 00:16:45.948
all I gotta do is go
to the school,
491
00:16:45.950 --> 00:16:47.149
charm the principal
a little bit.
492
00:16:47.151 --> 00:16:48.984
- Right? Get what I want.
- Yeah.
493
00:16:48.986 --> 00:16:51.519
Which is my GED.
Sounds pretty easy to me, Marv.
494
00:16:51.521 --> 00:16:54.490
- If you got your GED...
- Huh?
495
00:16:54.492 --> 00:16:56.492
I could probably hook you up.
496
00:16:56.494 --> 00:16:58.027
Listen to me, though.
Stop it. Stop, okay?
497
00:16:58.029 --> 00:17:00.395
Do yourself a favor,
and do not tell Lisa about this
498
00:17:00.397 --> 00:17:01.764
until it's a done deal.
499
00:17:01.766 --> 00:17:04.166
Now, you know I'm smarter
than that, Marv.
500
00:17:04.168 --> 00:17:05.835
You're gonna be
a financial analyst?
501
00:17:05.837 --> 00:17:07.469
TEDDY:
Yes, I am.
502
00:17:07.471 --> 00:17:09.572
I am, babe,
and it starts immediately.
503
00:17:09.574 --> 00:17:12.074
I was talking to Marv, and he
says that they could really use
504
00:17:12.076 --> 00:17:13.876
somebody with my skill set
at his firm.
505
00:17:13.878 --> 00:17:15.077
That's great.
506
00:17:15.079 --> 00:17:16.611
That's a great opportunity.
507
00:17:16.613 --> 00:17:19.182
Um... yeah, I mean, I'm-I'm...
508
00:17:19.184 --> 00:17:22.051
I'm basically pumped up
about it, you know?
509
00:17:22.053 --> 00:17:23.619
- LISA: You are so resilient, baby.
- Mmm.
510
00:17:23.621 --> 00:17:25.720
You keep bouncing back.
I am so proud of you.
511
00:17:25.722 --> 00:17:26.889
Yep.
512
00:17:26.891 --> 00:17:28.123
I love you.
513
00:17:28.125 --> 00:17:29.727
I love you, too.
514
00:17:31.796 --> 00:17:33.929
(VEHICLE APPROACHING,
HIP-HOP BLASTING OVER STEREO)
515
00:17:33.931 --> 00:17:36.131
Ma, of course
the thong is gonna
516
00:17:36.133 --> 00:17:37.900
cut you in the booty hole.
517
00:17:37.902 --> 00:17:39.834
That's what it do.
Look, next time Leon
518
00:17:39.836 --> 00:17:42.004
want to stick somebody
in a thong, you tell him
519
00:17:42.006 --> 00:17:44.139
that he need to put it on
and get a mirror
520
00:17:44.141 --> 00:17:45.774
and check and see
what <i>his</i> balls do.
521
00:17:45.776 --> 00:17:48.743
I don't care
if he <i>is</i> your pastor.
522
00:17:48.745 --> 00:17:52.147
Do the congregation know
he a freak like that?
523
00:17:52.149 --> 00:17:53.716
(CHUCKLES)
524
00:17:53.718 --> 00:17:55.084
Hold on, Mama.
525
00:17:55.086 --> 00:17:56.886
Can I help you, sir?
526
00:17:56.888 --> 00:17:58.620
Um...
527
00:17:58.622 --> 00:18:02.057
I couldn't help but overhear
your conversation.
528
00:18:02.059 --> 00:18:03.992
- Excuse me?
- You kind of loud.
529
00:18:03.994 --> 00:18:05.628
Well, then get out of my car.
530
00:18:05.630 --> 00:18:07.129
I'm not in your car.
I'm clearly in my car.
531
00:18:07.131 --> 00:18:09.530
- No, you're in my car.
- You're speaking loud enough...
532
00:18:09.532 --> 00:18:11.133
What are you,
the volume control police?
533
00:18:11.135 --> 00:18:12.467
I'm not sure
if that's even a thing.
534
00:18:12.469 --> 00:18:13.601
Mind your business.
535
00:18:13.603 --> 00:18:15.103
Your business
is becoming my business.
536
00:18:15.105 --> 00:18:16.604
Why don't you work
on your windshield?
537
00:18:16.606 --> 00:18:17.973
Now you're really
in my business.
538
00:18:17.975 --> 00:18:18.974
Probably look like
a kaleidoscope
539
00:18:18.976 --> 00:18:20.142
when you look through it.
540
00:18:20.144 --> 00:18:21.542
You know,
why don't you just...?
541
00:18:21.544 --> 00:18:22.510
You probably feel like
a little honeybee.
542
00:18:22.512 --> 00:18:24.646
- Enough.
- Looking at 18 things at one time,
543
00:18:24.648 --> 00:18:26.514
but really you're just looking
at one thing.
544
00:18:26.516 --> 00:18:27.715
I-I-I'm gonna get
in your business now.
545
00:18:27.717 --> 00:18:30.485
Tell your mother that she can
go buy a box of G-strings
546
00:18:30.487 --> 00:18:31.787
with her nasty ass.
547
00:18:31.789 --> 00:18:33.088
You're talking
about my mama now?
548
00:18:33.090 --> 00:18:35.090
Any pastor that's putting
a thong on his balls
549
00:18:35.092 --> 00:18:36.524
ain't right with God.
550
00:18:36.526 --> 00:18:38.192
- Pssh. What?
- Don't "pssh" me.
551
00:18:38.194 --> 00:18:39.594
- Pssh.
- (GRUNTS)
552
00:18:39.596 --> 00:18:40.595
- (YOWLS)
- (SQUEAKY GRUNT)
553
00:18:40.597 --> 00:18:41.997
- Yeah.
- (STAMMERS)
554
00:18:41.999 --> 00:18:43.832
- (ROARS)
- (HISSES)
555
00:18:43.834 --> 00:18:45.034
I bet that hurt your throat.
556
00:18:45.036 --> 00:18:46.235
Drive your car.
557
00:18:46.237 --> 00:18:47.202
What, Mama?
558
00:18:47.204 --> 00:18:48.270
Your mother's nasty.
559
00:18:48.272 --> 00:18:50.171
Girl, yeah, that's a little
ol' burnt leprechaun
560
00:18:50.173 --> 00:18:53.208
sitting next to me at this damn
light all in our conversation.
561
00:18:53.210 --> 00:18:55.911
- Excuse me? Hey.
- Nah, girl, you know he ain't got no gold.
562
00:18:55.913 --> 00:18:57.079
You know he ain't got no gold.
563
00:18:57.081 --> 00:18:58.247
- How about you grow up?
- Bye, boo!
564
00:18:58.249 --> 00:18:59.847
Hey.
565
00:18:59.849 --> 00:19:01.950
Speak... speaking of toast,
if you...?
566
00:19:01.952 --> 00:19:03.818
- Goddamn it, Teddy.
- (HORN HONKING)
567
00:19:03.820 --> 00:19:05.119
- I gotta work...
- MAN: Hey, yo!
568
00:19:05.121 --> 00:19:06.621
- Who you honk...?
- Let's go!
569
00:19:06.623 --> 00:19:08.057
I can't even see...
Where's my mirror?
570
00:19:08.059 --> 00:19:10.591
- Yo, man!
- Hey, who you honking at?
571
00:19:10.593 --> 00:19:13.229
♪
572
00:19:25.675 --> 00:19:26.841
(SCHOOL BELL RINGING)
573
00:19:26.843 --> 00:19:28.642
STEWART:
<i>So, game the system again,</i>
574
00:19:28.644 --> 00:19:29.812
<i>did we, Teddy?</i>
575
00:19:29.814 --> 00:19:31.713
TEDDY: <i>Stewart,
what is your problem with me?</i>
576
00:19:31.715 --> 00:19:33.881
My problem with you, Teddy,
is that students like you
577
00:19:33.883 --> 00:19:35.817
bring down the reputation
of this high school.
578
00:19:35.819 --> 00:19:37.185
- (MOCK CHATTERING)
- You may have everybody else
579
00:19:37.187 --> 00:19:38.853
at this school fooled,
but I know
580
00:19:38.855 --> 00:19:40.254
you're actually covering up
for the fact
581
00:19:40.256 --> 00:19:42.091
that you're really just
not that smart.
582
00:19:42.093 --> 00:19:44.559
In fact, you might be the
dumbest student at this school.
583
00:19:44.561 --> 00:19:46.261
- ♪ Uh-oh
- <i>♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪</i>
584
00:19:46.263 --> 00:19:48.997
- <i>♪ Yeah ♪</i> - ♪ Uh-oh ♪
- <i>♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪</i>
585
00:19:48.999 --> 00:19:51.698
- ♪ Uh-oh
- <i>♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. ♪</i>
586
00:19:51.700 --> 00:19:53.101
(CHUCKLING)
587
00:19:53.103 --> 00:19:55.170
(CHUCKLES)
588
00:19:55.172 --> 00:19:57.972
I am the music teacher.
589
00:19:57.974 --> 00:20:00.908
I don't know the first thing
about teaching biology.
590
00:20:00.910 --> 00:20:02.844
STEWART:
Oh, for God's sakes!
591
00:20:02.846 --> 00:20:05.613
What part of
"there is no musical program"
592
00:20:05.615 --> 00:20:07.149
do you not understand, Trish?
593
00:20:07.151 --> 00:20:09.050
Nobody's getting
into Ivy League schools
594
00:20:09.052 --> 00:20:10.818
- on a bassoon scholarship.
- Oh, shit.
595
00:20:10.820 --> 00:20:12.687
TEDDY:
<i>You know, I'm not book smart.</i>
596
00:20:12.689 --> 00:20:14.322
Stewart's smarter than me.
597
00:20:14.324 --> 00:20:16.024
But you know what I'm not?
598
00:20:16.026 --> 00:20:17.725
I'm not a freak of nature,
Stew.
599
00:20:17.727 --> 00:20:18.993
Uh-oh, Stew.
600
00:20:18.995 --> 00:20:20.362
Don't do this, Teddy.
601
00:20:20.364 --> 00:20:22.296
Hey, quick question, everybody.
602
00:20:22.298 --> 00:20:25.133
Has anybody here ever seen
Stewart with his shirt off?
603
00:20:25.135 --> 00:20:27.335
It's a birthmark.
It's a birthmark!
604
00:20:27.337 --> 00:20:29.737
- If it's a birthmark, let us see it right now.
- Prove it.
605
00:20:29.739 --> 00:20:31.739
You all want to see
my birthmark?
606
00:20:31.741 --> 00:20:32.807
- STUDENTS: Yes!
- Come on! I'm dying!
607
00:20:32.809 --> 00:20:34.008
I'll prove it. See?
608
00:20:34.010 --> 00:20:35.845
(STUDENTS YELLING AND GASPING)
609
00:20:37.180 --> 00:20:38.779
It's a birthmark!
610
00:20:38.781 --> 00:20:41.014
You got a pig's butthole
on your chest, man.
611
00:20:41.016 --> 00:20:43.151
There's no hole in it,
so how could it be a butthole?
612
00:20:43.153 --> 00:20:45.153
TEDDY:
<i>You got a third nipple, man!</i>
613
00:20:45.155 --> 00:20:46.888
Who's next, Dolores?
614
00:20:46.890 --> 00:20:48.825
This young man right here.
615
00:20:50.360 --> 00:20:53.264
(CHUCKLING):
Hey. What's up, Stewart?
616
00:20:55.165 --> 00:20:57.965
(SIGHS)
We had good times, didn't we?
617
00:20:57.967 --> 00:21:00.902
I laugh at how much we laughed.
618
00:21:00.904 --> 00:21:03.173
(CHUCKLING):
That's some...
619
00:21:08.344 --> 00:21:09.977
(TEDDY SIGHS)
620
00:21:09.979 --> 00:21:11.279
So, uh...
621
00:21:11.281 --> 00:21:13.314
how long you been
the principal, man?
622
00:21:13.316 --> 00:21:14.714
Going on two years.
623
00:21:14.716 --> 00:21:16.350
- Wow.
- Yeah. Wasn't easy,
624
00:21:16.352 --> 00:21:20.822
but, uh, cleaned this place up
using my brain and my bat.
625
00:21:20.824 --> 00:21:22.990
As opposed to when we went
to high school,
626
00:21:22.992 --> 00:21:25.293
now, if you have
a "D" average, you're out.
627
00:21:25.295 --> 00:21:26.860
Can you do that?
628
00:21:26.862 --> 00:21:28.297
I can do whatever I want,
Teddy.
629
00:21:29.433 --> 00:21:31.199
This my house.
630
00:21:31.201 --> 00:21:33.835
I'm sorry, what...
what was that last part?
631
00:21:33.837 --> 00:21:34.938
I said look around you.
632
00:21:35.904 --> 00:21:39.407
This is... my...
633
00:21:39.409 --> 00:21:41.377
house.
634
00:21:43.446 --> 00:21:45.879
Excuse me for asking, but are
you doing a black voice?
635
00:21:45.881 --> 00:21:48.048
No, no. Not a black voice.
636
00:21:48.050 --> 00:21:49.950
- You sure?
- I don't hear color.
637
00:21:49.952 --> 00:21:53.020
- Mmm.
- What brings you back to Piedmont, Mr. Walker?
638
00:21:53.022 --> 00:21:55.857
Right now I'm transitioning
from an amazing job in sales
639
00:21:55.859 --> 00:21:57.858
to a job in finance,
and the only thing
640
00:21:57.860 --> 00:21:59.826
that's really holding up
this transition
641
00:21:59.828 --> 00:22:02.295
is me not having my GED.
642
00:22:02.297 --> 00:22:04.264
So, I don't know,
I was thinking maybe I could
643
00:22:04.266 --> 00:22:06.400
get you to cross some T's,
dot some I's.
644
00:22:06.402 --> 00:22:08.269
- (CHUCKLING)
- Maybe you could do
645
00:22:08.271 --> 00:22:10.204
a favor for an old friend.
646
00:22:10.206 --> 00:22:12.273
(SIGHS) Some things just
never change, huh, Teddy?
647
00:22:12.275 --> 00:22:14.107
You want me to help you
648
00:22:14.109 --> 00:22:17.311
find a shortcut
to getting your diploma.
649
00:22:17.313 --> 00:22:18.446
No.
650
00:22:18.448 --> 00:22:19.880
Yes.
651
00:22:19.882 --> 00:22:21.415
Hmm.
652
00:22:21.417 --> 00:22:24.050
I wish I could. I really do.
653
00:22:24.052 --> 00:22:25.385
But you would have to go
654
00:22:25.387 --> 00:22:28.755
to night school to learn
how to pass the GED test,
655
00:22:28.757 --> 00:22:31.292
and unfortunately we don't
offer night school here.
656
00:22:31.294 --> 00:22:33.727
I'm so sorry, Teddy.
657
00:22:33.729 --> 00:22:35.431
Let me walk you out.
658
00:22:37.500 --> 00:22:39.866
You want to touch her?
659
00:22:39.868 --> 00:22:41.801
- I'm sorry?
- Come on.
660
00:22:41.803 --> 00:22:43.970
Touch my big black bat.
661
00:22:43.972 --> 00:22:46.106
Um, no, I'm...
662
00:22:46.108 --> 00:22:48.243
Go ahead, say hi.
663
00:22:50.412 --> 00:22:53.414
Ah!
(LAUGHS)
664
00:22:53.416 --> 00:22:56.217
(À LA MORGAN FREEMAN): You used
to call me Crazy Stewart.
665
00:22:56.219 --> 00:22:59.788
Now you call me Batman.
666
00:23:02.858 --> 00:23:03.990
(TEDDY GROANS)
667
00:23:03.992 --> 00:23:05.193
- (LOUD BANG)
- (STUDENT GASPS)
668
00:23:05.195 --> 00:23:06.927
Remove the
Beats by Andre, Rudy.
669
00:23:06.929 --> 00:23:08.862
School policy...
no headphones on campus
670
00:23:08.864 --> 00:23:10.464
unless you're using
Rosetta Stone.
671
00:23:10.466 --> 00:23:12.832
Hey, uh... hey, Stew,
you think you're taking
672
00:23:12.834 --> 00:23:14.868
the right approach here
with these kids?
673
00:23:14.870 --> 00:23:16.469
They look a little
stressed out, man.
674
00:23:16.471 --> 00:23:19.540
I am preparing them for
the real world, Teddy, okay?
675
00:23:19.542 --> 00:23:21.775
I may not be their best friend,
676
00:23:21.777 --> 00:23:23.777
- but everyone here respects me.
- Okay.
677
00:23:23.779 --> 00:23:26.012
- What the fuck, Stewart?
- Uh, hey, hey, hey, hey.
678
00:23:26.014 --> 00:23:27.981
Let's watch the language,
please, Miss Carter.
679
00:23:27.983 --> 00:23:30.451
Why did you add AP Calculus
to my class load,
680
00:23:30.453 --> 00:23:32.219
knowing good and well
I already have
681
00:23:32.221 --> 00:23:34.120
five units to teach
plus night school?
682
00:23:34.122 --> 00:23:35.889
- It's too much.
- Wait, hold on.
683
00:23:35.891 --> 00:23:38.158
You're... you're
the night school teacher?
684
00:23:38.160 --> 00:23:40.160
No, I'm just a bitch
that like to wear blouses.
685
00:23:40.162 --> 00:23:41.861
Yes, I'm the night school
teacher.
686
00:23:41.863 --> 00:23:43.397
Did you bring me some
dried shamrocks, leprechaun?
687
00:23:43.399 --> 00:23:44.798
TEDDY:
It's still not funny.
688
00:23:44.800 --> 00:23:46.099
Wait, well, hold up.
689
00:23:46.101 --> 00:23:47.500
Stew, why'd you
just tell me that you
690
00:23:47.502 --> 00:23:48.568
don't have night school here?
691
00:23:48.570 --> 00:23:50.270
Why would you say that?
692
00:23:50.272 --> 00:23:53.940
I said that because Teddy and I
went to school together.
693
00:23:53.942 --> 00:23:57.077
He is, quite frankly,
a terrible student,
694
00:23:57.079 --> 00:23:58.945
and I did not want
that element in here.
695
00:23:58.947 --> 00:24:00.846
I don't care if he's
as dumb as a Minion.
696
00:24:00.848 --> 00:24:02.582
He is welcome to take my class
if he wants.
697
00:24:02.584 --> 00:24:04.484
Thank you. Thank you for that.
698
00:24:04.486 --> 00:24:06.520
You're welcome.
'Cause you-you need it.
699
00:24:06.522 --> 00:24:09.055
Carrie, can we just
take down the 'tude?
700
00:24:09.057 --> 00:24:10.190
- 'Tude? Really?
- No, I'm...
701
00:24:10.192 --> 00:24:12.158
You haven't even seen
the beginning of this attitude.
702
00:24:12.160 --> 00:24:14.160
- Oh, I-I...
- Wait, say that to me again.
703
00:24:14.162 --> 00:24:15.195
I apologize.
704
00:24:15.197 --> 00:24:16.596
That was a poor choice
of words.
705
00:24:16.598 --> 00:24:19.132
I just mean I need you
to show me the respect
706
00:24:19.134 --> 00:24:20.900
that you would show your boss.
707
00:24:20.902 --> 00:24:22.235
Because this is your house,
right?
708
00:24:22.237 --> 00:24:23.869
Oh, you... you did the
black voice thing with him?
709
00:24:23.871 --> 00:24:25.071
It's not a black voice.
710
00:24:25.073 --> 00:24:27.039
In actuality,
not a black voice.
711
00:24:27.041 --> 00:24:28.475
No, you do a black voice.
712
00:24:28.477 --> 00:24:30.043
You don't remember when
you was in that meeting,
713
00:24:30.045 --> 00:24:31.845
you was like, "We gonna
get it lit up in here.
714
00:24:31.847 --> 00:24:32.846
This meeting lit!"
715
00:24:32.848 --> 00:24:33.947
It was very lit.
716
00:24:33.949 --> 00:24:35.215
CARRIE:
You did it at the staff meeting
717
00:24:35.217 --> 00:24:37.517
when you were like,
"I keep it one hundred."
718
00:24:37.519 --> 00:24:39.051
When have I never kept it
one hunnid?
719
00:24:39.053 --> 00:24:42.155
When you added that AP Calculus
to my class load.
720
00:24:42.157 --> 00:24:44.557
All right, agree to disagree.
Listen, I hate to break up
721
00:24:44.559 --> 00:24:46.993
this pleasure party
of delusion,
722
00:24:46.995 --> 00:24:48.361
but I have work to do.
723
00:24:48.363 --> 00:24:50.299
- Wow.
- So, if you'll excuse me...
724
00:24:51.400 --> 00:24:54.067
I'm-a do my thang.
725
00:24:54.069 --> 00:24:55.902
(SCOFFS)
726
00:24:55.904 --> 00:24:58.371
That's... that's a black voice.
727
00:24:58.373 --> 00:25:00.373
- STEWART: Look alive, people!
- (STUDENTS GASP)
728
00:25:00.375 --> 00:25:03.142
Let's move with purpose!
Go, go, go, go, go!
729
00:25:03.144 --> 00:25:05.045
- Hey. Hey.
- No loitering in my hall!
730
00:25:05.047 --> 00:25:07.614
Can... can he really do that?
Can he keep me from going here?
731
00:25:07.616 --> 00:25:10.883
No, he can't. As a matter
of fact, here's a textbook.
732
00:25:10.885 --> 00:25:12.951
I'm actually going to set up
the class right now
733
00:25:12.953 --> 00:25:14.887
for our first session
of the semester.
734
00:25:14.889 --> 00:25:16.255
We start at 7:00.
735
00:25:16.257 --> 00:25:18.291
Yeah, but this-this book
is just kind of thick.
736
00:25:18.293 --> 00:25:21.096
(CHUCKLING): I thought it
would be more like a leaflet.
737
00:25:22.297 --> 00:25:24.096
(SNIFFS)
738
00:25:24.098 --> 00:25:26.265
You thought you could cram
four years of high school
739
00:25:26.267 --> 00:25:27.366
into a leaflet?
740
00:25:27.368 --> 00:25:28.534
- No.
- Maybe you are
741
00:25:28.536 --> 00:25:30.904
- as dumb as Stewart says.
- Wait, wait, no, no, no, no.
742
00:25:30.906 --> 00:25:32.038
No, no, I didn't...
I didn't think that.
743
00:25:32.040 --> 00:25:33.273
- Go to the library, then.
- I just...
744
00:25:33.275 --> 00:25:34.474
- I'll hold on...
- Little scrawny midget!
745
00:25:34.476 --> 00:25:36.141
I'll hold on to it.
746
00:25:36.143 --> 00:25:37.910
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm trippin'.
747
00:25:37.912 --> 00:25:40.012
I'm thinking along the lines
of traffic school.
748
00:25:40.014 --> 00:25:42.048
Look, come or not...
makes me no difference.
749
00:25:42.050 --> 00:25:44.016
I don't get paid by the head.
750
00:25:44.018 --> 00:25:45.951
Or maybe you can find
a night school
751
00:25:45.953 --> 00:25:47.587
that does teach from a leaflet.
752
00:25:47.589 --> 00:25:49.254
You-you know of one that...?
753
00:25:49.256 --> 00:25:50.624
No, no, no.
I'm-I'm gonna keep it.
754
00:25:52.193 --> 00:25:53.460
Have a good one.
755
00:25:53.462 --> 00:25:56.496
TEDDY: <i>Marv, I do not know
about this GED thing.</i>
756
00:25:56.498 --> 00:25:58.465
I don't, man.
The teacher is tough as hell.
757
00:25:58.467 --> 00:26:00.232
Hold on.
Marv, let me hit you back.
758
00:26:00.234 --> 00:26:01.233
Yo!
759
00:26:01.235 --> 00:26:02.501
Oh, shit!
760
00:26:02.503 --> 00:26:04.403
Hold up! Stop, stop!
761
00:26:04.405 --> 00:26:06.473
- What you doing?
- What's it look like I'm doing?
762
00:26:06.475 --> 00:26:08.508
Uh, it look like
you towing my car.
763
00:26:08.510 --> 00:26:10.075
Did I park in a handicap spot?
764
00:26:10.077 --> 00:26:11.644
You've missed the last four
payments on that car.
765
00:26:11.646 --> 00:26:12.712
It's getting repossessed.
766
00:26:12.714 --> 00:26:14.680
You gonna take my car
with my baby in the back?
767
00:26:14.682 --> 00:26:16.982
Don't see no goddamn baby
in there.
768
00:26:16.984 --> 00:26:20.152
The baby right there.
(IMITATES CRYING BABY)
769
00:26:20.154 --> 00:26:22.454
- You don't hear that?
- I don't think so.
770
00:26:22.456 --> 00:26:24.425
Hey, man, I said don't do it.
771
00:26:25.459 --> 00:26:26.959
I'm not playing.
772
00:26:26.961 --> 00:26:28.060
Get out of the way, dude.
773
00:26:28.062 --> 00:26:29.562
Stop, man.
774
00:26:29.564 --> 00:26:30.697
I got my baby in here!
775
00:26:30.699 --> 00:26:32.465
- The car is leaving.
- (STAMMERS)
776
00:26:32.467 --> 00:26:34.099
- Get out of the way, dude.
- I'll show you leaving.
777
00:26:34.101 --> 00:26:35.567
- Come on, man.
- I've got something for your ass.
778
00:26:35.569 --> 00:26:37.436
- (ENGINE STARTS, REVS)
- Get out of the car.
779
00:26:37.438 --> 00:26:39.438
(TIRES SQUEALING)
780
00:26:39.440 --> 00:26:42.007
(YELLS)
781
00:26:42.009 --> 00:26:43.976
- You want to play that game?
- Yeah!
782
00:26:43.978 --> 00:26:46.113
- You want to see something?
- Come on, then!
783
00:26:47.715 --> 00:26:49.281
(SCREAMING)
784
00:26:49.283 --> 00:26:50.416
- Bye.
- (SCREAMING CONTINUES)
785
00:26:50.418 --> 00:26:51.450
Dumb-ass.
786
00:26:51.452 --> 00:26:52.719
Oh, God!
787
00:26:52.721 --> 00:26:54.654
(STUDENTS GROANING AND GASPING)
788
00:26:54.656 --> 00:26:56.488
Glad y'all enjoyed the show.
789
00:26:56.490 --> 00:26:58.190
(TEDDY YELLS)
790
00:26:58.192 --> 00:27:01.160
TEDDY: Tell my fiancée
I got in another accident!
791
00:27:01.162 --> 00:27:03.097
♪
792
00:27:07.401 --> 00:27:09.268
TEDDY:
Uh...
793
00:27:09.270 --> 00:27:11.637
- Carrie, right?
- Oh.
794
00:27:11.639 --> 00:27:13.305
So, even though we got
textbook-sized textbooks,
795
00:27:13.307 --> 00:27:14.506
you decided to join us.
796
00:27:14.508 --> 00:27:17.042
- (CHUCKLES)
- Well, grab a seat.
797
00:27:17.044 --> 00:27:18.545
We'll get started in a few.
798
00:27:18.547 --> 00:27:21.180
Uh, okay, before I do that...
now, I know we got off
799
00:27:21.182 --> 00:27:23.182
on the wrong foot,
so I was thinking.
800
00:27:23.184 --> 00:27:25.451
I don't know... I don't know if
you had time for dinner or not,
801
00:27:25.453 --> 00:27:27.453
so I took it upon myself
802
00:27:27.455 --> 00:27:30.189
to go and get you one
of my personal favorites.
803
00:27:30.191 --> 00:27:31.791
It's the best Mexican
here in the A.
804
00:27:31.793 --> 00:27:33.392
Oh. Thank you.
805
00:27:33.394 --> 00:27:35.327
That is so thoughtful
of you, Teddy.
806
00:27:35.329 --> 00:27:37.663
- (CHUCKLES)
- So, check this out.
807
00:27:37.665 --> 00:27:39.398
I went through some of
your old high school records.
808
00:27:39.400 --> 00:27:41.033
- Uh-huh.
- Math,
809
00:27:41.035 --> 00:27:44.636
science, English...
you was a horrible student.
810
00:27:44.638 --> 00:27:46.271
What was going on
with you then?
811
00:27:46.273 --> 00:27:47.539
Was you being abused
or something?
812
00:27:47.541 --> 00:27:49.140
(CHUCKLES)
Carrie, the thing with me
813
00:27:49.142 --> 00:27:51.443
is I prefer to use the world
as my classroom.
814
00:27:51.445 --> 00:27:54.646
And to be honest with you,
I'm not a...
815
00:27:54.648 --> 00:27:57.182
I'm not like the rest
of these folks.
816
00:27:57.184 --> 00:28:00.219
I'm just not what you would
call a night school person.
817
00:28:00.221 --> 00:28:03.354
So I figure, maybe you and I
can look out for one another.
818
00:28:03.356 --> 00:28:05.190
You help me, I help you.
819
00:28:05.192 --> 00:28:06.725
You got my back,
I got your back.
820
00:28:06.727 --> 00:28:08.727
Whatever, but it's just
a conversation.
821
00:28:08.729 --> 00:28:10.829
So enjoy your tacos.
822
00:28:10.831 --> 00:28:13.434
That smile can light up a room,
can't it? (CHUCKLES)
823
00:28:17.571 --> 00:28:19.607
I ain't going there.
824
00:28:23.577 --> 00:28:25.646
(TEDDY HUMMING UNDER BREATH)
825
00:28:36.457 --> 00:28:39.158
MAN:
Remember me, <i>pendejo?</i>
826
00:28:44.498 --> 00:28:47.098
Well, if it isn't Pubey McGee.
827
00:28:47.100 --> 00:28:49.601
The cheesecake puber
is here, huh?
828
00:28:49.603 --> 00:28:51.202
Surprised to see me, bro?
829
00:28:51.204 --> 00:28:53.238
You shouldn't be, considering
that you got me fired.
830
00:28:53.240 --> 00:28:56.174
- I did not get you fired.
- Yes, you did.
831
00:28:56.176 --> 00:28:57.409
TEDDY:
I worked in customer service
832
00:28:57.411 --> 00:28:58.844
for a long time.
Everybody knows that
833
00:28:58.846 --> 00:29:00.879
- the customer is always right.
- (CARRIE CLEARS THROAT)
834
00:29:00.881 --> 00:29:03.648
- Tips are my livelihood.
- I had a 20 coming your way.
835
00:29:03.650 --> 00:29:05.350
LUIS:
The bill was $800.
836
00:29:05.352 --> 00:29:07.819
I had a buck sixty
coming to me, man.
837
00:29:07.821 --> 00:29:09.688
- Okay. That's your fault.
- CARRIE: Okay, let's begin.
838
00:29:09.690 --> 00:29:11.723
Who here likes tacos?
839
00:29:11.725 --> 00:29:13.892
- MAN: Oh! Oh, oh.
- Ooh!
840
00:29:13.894 --> 00:29:16.294
- (CHUCKLING)
- They vegetarian?
841
00:29:16.296 --> 00:29:18.530
'Cause I don't eat meat
unless it's barbecue.
842
00:29:18.532 --> 00:29:20.197
Let's see what Teddy
brought us.
843
00:29:20.199 --> 00:29:22.400
Uh, we got carne asada.
844
00:29:22.402 --> 00:29:23.635
- There you go.
- (CHUCKLES)
845
00:29:23.637 --> 00:29:25.169
There's, uh, al pastor.
846
00:29:25.171 --> 00:29:26.504
- Oh, thanks.
- You... you like that? Um...
847
00:29:26.506 --> 00:29:27.705
Carnitas? You like carnitas?
848
00:29:27.707 --> 00:29:29.141
- There you go, girl.
- WOMAN: Ooh!
849
00:29:29.143 --> 00:29:30.742
- Uh... uh, excuse me.
- Hey!
850
00:29:30.744 --> 00:29:33.779
Carrie, I-I had actually got
those tacos for you to eat.
851
00:29:33.781 --> 00:29:35.179
I know.
852
00:29:35.181 --> 00:29:37.348
See, class, Teddy went to...
853
00:29:37.350 --> 00:29:40.184
Cactus House
to try to win me over.
854
00:29:40.186 --> 00:29:41.453
But here's the deal, Teddy.
855
00:29:41.455 --> 00:29:43.321
If you're trying
to kiss my ass,
856
00:29:43.323 --> 00:29:45.323
you're gonna have to come
a little bit better than that.
857
00:29:45.325 --> 00:29:46.925
I'm talking, like,
steamed lobster
858
00:29:46.927 --> 00:29:48.894
inside a macaroni and cheese,
859
00:29:48.896 --> 00:29:50.595
with a side of broccolini.
860
00:29:50.597 --> 00:29:52.664
You know what I'm saying?
Something fancy.
861
00:29:52.666 --> 00:29:54.666
Not no fast food place
where I could
862
00:29:54.668 --> 00:29:56.802
go buy this with my own
little raggedy paycheck.
863
00:29:56.804 --> 00:29:58.737
Well, there's actually a...
864
00:29:58.739 --> 00:30:00.771
there's actually
a special guacamole...
865
00:30:00.773 --> 00:30:04.543
If you want to succeed
in my class,
866
00:30:04.545 --> 00:30:05.811
you need to do the work.
867
00:30:05.813 --> 00:30:07.178
It's just that simple.
868
00:30:07.180 --> 00:30:08.512
- Yes?
- Uh, quick question.
869
00:30:08.514 --> 00:30:11.349
Uh, so "yes"
on the steamed lobster?
870
00:30:11.351 --> 00:30:13.317
No, sir.
871
00:30:13.319 --> 00:30:15.853
That's what I like to call
"a teachable moment."
872
00:30:15.855 --> 00:30:18.557
Okay, so no lobster.
873
00:30:18.559 --> 00:30:21.659
Um, all right, let's go ahead
and do some introductions.
874
00:30:21.661 --> 00:30:22.793
I'll start.
875
00:30:22.795 --> 00:30:24.195
My name is Carrie.
876
00:30:24.197 --> 00:30:25.630
During the day, I teach
877
00:30:25.632 --> 00:30:27.632
way too many classes
for way too little money.
878
00:30:27.634 --> 00:30:30.468
So I'm here to try to make
a little extra cash
879
00:30:30.470 --> 00:30:34.872
so I can afford such luxuries
as rent and antibiotics.
880
00:30:34.874 --> 00:30:38.242
'Cause this job makes me sick
sometimes.
881
00:30:38.244 --> 00:30:40.343
(CHUCKLES)
Uh, you're next.
882
00:30:40.345 --> 00:30:42.246
Yes, you.
883
00:30:42.248 --> 00:30:44.248
As-salaam alaikum.
884
00:30:44.250 --> 00:30:45.683
What up, though?
885
00:30:45.685 --> 00:30:47.551
Jaylen's the name.
886
00:30:47.553 --> 00:30:49.587
I've been working
for the last 14 years
887
00:30:49.589 --> 00:30:50.955
at the MacArthur Bottling Plant
888
00:30:50.957 --> 00:30:52.660
and just got replaced
by a robot.
889
00:30:53.994 --> 00:30:55.861
And my rib, my Cleopatra,
890
00:30:55.863 --> 00:30:57.762
my queen, my bottom bitch,
891
00:30:57.764 --> 00:31:00.498
my wife of 14 years,
she was like, "Yo,
892
00:31:00.500 --> 00:31:02.967
"if you want options,
you gonna have to get your GED.
893
00:31:02.969 --> 00:31:04.803
"It's either that
or end up cleaning rooms
894
00:31:04.805 --> 00:31:07.605
at the Best Western
for half your salary."
895
00:31:07.607 --> 00:31:09.640
And if you know Jay,
that ain't gonna work.
896
00:31:09.642 --> 00:31:12.643
Hey, let me...
let me just say this,
897
00:31:12.645 --> 00:31:14.979
okay, while I got the platform.
898
00:31:14.981 --> 00:31:18.616
For me, I first got woke
when I seen <i>Terminator,</i>
899
00:31:18.618 --> 00:31:22.386
and I realized
it wasn't just a movie;
900
00:31:22.388 --> 00:31:23.788
it was prophecy.
901
00:31:23.790 --> 00:31:26.524
First identified
by the 3.5-Percenters,
902
00:31:26.526 --> 00:31:27.792
but that's another
conversation.
903
00:31:27.794 --> 00:31:29.627
Let's just put it like this.
904
00:31:29.629 --> 00:31:31.829
The revolution
will not be roboticized.
905
00:31:31.831 --> 00:31:33.431
Mm-hmm.
906
00:31:33.433 --> 00:31:34.865
Not on Jay's watch.
907
00:31:34.867 --> 00:31:36.567
Huh?
908
00:31:36.569 --> 00:31:38.568
Real nigga shit.
909
00:31:38.570 --> 00:31:39.770
- Huh?
- CARRIE: Thank you, Jaylen.
910
00:31:39.772 --> 00:31:41.372
I'll make sure
I don't bring my Roomba
911
00:31:41.374 --> 00:31:42.473
to the next class.
912
00:31:42.475 --> 00:31:44.909
My wife takes rumba classes.
913
00:31:44.911 --> 00:31:46.811
- I don't get it.
- CARRIE: Let's keep it moving.
914
00:31:46.813 --> 00:31:48.411
Uh, how about you, ma'am?
915
00:31:48.413 --> 00:31:49.914
- Yeah.
- Oh.
916
00:31:49.916 --> 00:31:51.514
Okay. Hi, gang.
917
00:31:51.516 --> 00:31:52.783
My name is Theresa,
918
00:31:52.785 --> 00:31:54.618
and I dropped out
of high school
919
00:31:54.620 --> 00:31:56.654
when I was pregnant
with my first child.
920
00:31:56.656 --> 00:31:58.489
My now-husband, Randy,
921
00:31:58.491 --> 00:32:00.423
well, we got married
after he knocked me up.
922
00:32:00.425 --> 00:32:01.859
Then we had two more kids,
so we have
923
00:32:01.861 --> 00:32:03.626
three little rascals now,
and it's fun.
924
00:32:03.628 --> 00:32:05.362
- (IMITATES GUNSHOT)
- We're just a little underwater
925
00:32:05.364 --> 00:32:07.765
right now, so I wanted
to get my GED and hopefully
926
00:32:07.767 --> 00:32:10.300
enter the workforce
before it's too late
927
00:32:10.302 --> 00:32:12.672
and we have to live in
Randy's parents' laundry room.
928
00:32:18.544 --> 00:32:20.377
I'm blessed.
929
00:32:20.379 --> 00:32:21.812
So blessed.
930
00:32:21.814 --> 00:32:23.513
God is good.
931
00:32:23.515 --> 00:32:25.548
That's what's up.
932
00:32:25.550 --> 00:32:26.951
CARRIE:
Uh, how about you, young lady?
933
00:32:26.953 --> 00:32:28.586
Oh.
934
00:32:28.588 --> 00:32:30.855
Hey, uh, what's up?
I'm Mila.
935
00:32:30.857 --> 00:32:32.690
I got kicked out
of my high school
936
00:32:32.692 --> 00:32:34.324
because they found
some Molly in my locker.
937
00:32:34.326 --> 00:32:35.760
- Mm-hmm.
- And I can avoid juvie
938
00:32:35.762 --> 00:32:38.428
if I get my GED, so here I am.
939
00:32:38.430 --> 00:32:40.664
- I'm so psyched.
- Cool.
940
00:32:40.666 --> 00:32:43.801
Look at you, all cute,
making America great again.
941
00:32:43.803 --> 00:32:46.402
- Bitch.
- (SCOFFS)
942
00:32:46.404 --> 00:32:47.872
So, what's your story, guy?
943
00:32:47.874 --> 00:32:50.107
Um, my name is Luis Flores.
944
00:32:50.109 --> 00:32:52.375
I had a great job as a waiter.
945
00:32:52.377 --> 00:32:54.345
Lot of money in tips.
946
00:32:54.347 --> 00:32:56.981
Until I was fired
without cause.
947
00:32:56.983 --> 00:32:58.716
No reason at all.
948
00:32:58.718 --> 00:33:00.285
(WHISPERS):
Fired.
949
00:33:01.653 --> 00:33:03.453
I don't know why...
I have no idea
950
00:33:03.455 --> 00:33:04.889
why he's looking at me.
I don't...
951
00:33:04.891 --> 00:33:06.423
It's fine.
952
00:33:06.425 --> 00:33:07.792
It's just a sign that it's time
953
00:33:07.794 --> 00:33:09.126
for me to do
something different.
954
00:33:09.128 --> 00:33:10.760
You see,
I came to this country
955
00:33:10.762 --> 00:33:12.562
from Mexico
to fulfill my dream
956
00:33:12.564 --> 00:33:13.797
of being a singer/songwriter.
957
00:33:13.799 --> 00:33:15.532
Oh, like Julio Iglesias?
958
00:33:15.534 --> 00:33:18.035
No, not like Julio Iglesias.
959
00:33:18.037 --> 00:33:19.737
He sucks.
960
00:33:19.739 --> 00:33:22.039
More like Justin Bieber
961
00:33:22.041 --> 00:33:25.608
or Justin Timberlake
or T-Pain.
962
00:33:25.610 --> 00:33:28.813
(LAUGHS)
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
963
00:33:28.815 --> 00:33:31.816
Aren't you a little old
to, like, be a pop star now?
964
00:33:31.818 --> 00:33:33.451
Aren't you a little young
to die?
965
00:33:35.121 --> 00:33:37.154
That's what's up.
966
00:33:37.156 --> 00:33:40.991
But now I'm going to become
a dental "hy-enist."
967
00:33:40.993 --> 00:33:43.894
'Cause I have great teeth.
968
00:33:43.896 --> 00:33:45.895
So I think I'd be a natural.
969
00:33:45.897 --> 00:33:47.564
A what?
970
00:33:47.566 --> 00:33:49.467
Dental hy-enist.
971
00:33:50.702 --> 00:33:52.101
Maybe you should see one.
972
00:33:52.103 --> 00:33:55.638
'Cause, you know what,
pretty stinky, guys.
973
00:33:55.640 --> 00:33:56.974
MAN:
All right. Hey, everybody.
974
00:33:56.976 --> 00:33:58.175
I'm Mackenzie.
975
00:33:58.177 --> 00:33:59.809
Uh, they call me Big Mac.
976
00:33:59.811 --> 00:34:01.678
Oh, we love McDonald's.
977
00:34:01.680 --> 00:34:02.946
What?
978
00:34:02.948 --> 00:34:05.049
McDonald's?
979
00:34:05.051 --> 00:34:06.683
I'm sorry, what?
980
00:34:06.685 --> 00:34:08.620
From the burger joint,
Mickey D's.
981
00:34:09.888 --> 00:34:11.423
Ronald McDonald's.
982
00:34:12.691 --> 00:34:13.923
"Two all-beef patties,
983
00:34:13.925 --> 00:34:15.524
"special sauce,
lettuce, cheese,
984
00:34:15.526 --> 00:34:17.761
- on a sesame-seed bun."
- Hmm.
985
00:34:17.763 --> 00:34:19.629
Never heard of it?
986
00:34:19.631 --> 00:34:22.565
(WHIMPERS, GROANS)
987
00:34:22.567 --> 00:34:25.869
Ooh, it's gonna be
a long semester.
988
00:34:25.871 --> 00:34:28.171
- Go on.
- MACKENZIE: Well, anyway,
989
00:34:28.173 --> 00:34:32.508
uh, my knees and my back
are really jacked up
990
00:34:32.510 --> 00:34:35.011
from working at He-Man Movers
for 30 years,
991
00:34:35.013 --> 00:34:38.815
so I decided to get my GED
so that I could move up
992
00:34:38.817 --> 00:34:41.218
to a management position,
get off the truck.
993
00:34:41.220 --> 00:34:43.820
And my son...
we call him Little Mac...
994
00:34:43.822 --> 00:34:45.822
he has decided
to drop out of school.
995
00:34:45.824 --> 00:34:48.625
So I made a deal with him:
I get my GED,
996
00:34:48.627 --> 00:34:50.193
he gets his diploma.
997
00:34:50.195 --> 00:34:51.593
(CHUCKLES)
998
00:34:51.595 --> 00:34:53.630
Little reverse psychology.
999
00:34:53.632 --> 00:34:55.031
All right.
1000
00:34:55.033 --> 00:34:56.566
And what's your name?
1001
00:34:56.568 --> 00:34:58.234
Hey, yo, what up? I'm Bobby.
1002
00:34:58.236 --> 00:35:00.069
That's what...
that's what I'm talking about.
1003
00:35:00.071 --> 00:35:02.906
That's Illuminati.
That's what I'm saying.
1004
00:35:02.908 --> 00:35:04.807
See, the nigga here,
but he ain't here.
1005
00:35:04.809 --> 00:35:06.643
It's like they watching you,
1006
00:35:06.645 --> 00:35:08.245
and you think
you watching them.
1007
00:35:08.247 --> 00:35:09.479
That's what they do.
1008
00:35:09.481 --> 00:35:11.014
So you got Bobby Digital.
1009
00:35:11.016 --> 00:35:12.849
He here, but he not.
1010
00:35:12.851 --> 00:35:14.217
That's Tupac Coachella.
1011
00:35:14.219 --> 00:35:15.251
(CHUCKLING):
You know what I'm saying?
1012
00:35:15.253 --> 00:35:17.121
And he in the... You see?
1013
00:35:17.123 --> 00:35:19.223
- Y'all don't...?
- All right, um...
1014
00:35:19.225 --> 00:35:21.591
That probably ain't even
a real nigga. Hey.
1015
00:35:21.593 --> 00:35:23.793
Are you on crack?
It's-it's Skype.
1016
00:35:23.795 --> 00:35:26.595
(SIGHS) Whew, boy,
it's hard to be woke.
1017
00:35:26.597 --> 00:35:27.729
(CHUCKLES)
1018
00:35:27.731 --> 00:35:29.168
It's hard to be woke.
1019
00:35:30.502 --> 00:35:32.769
What is "woke"?
1020
00:35:32.771 --> 00:35:35.672
Okay, well, welcome, everyone.
1021
00:35:35.674 --> 00:35:36.773
Really nice. We've all met.
1022
00:35:36.775 --> 00:35:38.207
Well, we didn't, uh...
1023
00:35:38.209 --> 00:35:40.109
we didn't meet...
we didn't meet everyone.
1024
00:35:40.111 --> 00:35:42.211
- I didn't, uh...
- Teddy, uh, earlier,
1025
00:35:42.213 --> 00:35:44.047
you said, unlike these folks,
1026
00:35:44.049 --> 00:35:46.548
you're not a night school
type of person,
1027
00:35:46.550 --> 00:35:49.551
so I didn't think you cared.
1028
00:35:49.553 --> 00:35:51.187
JAYLEN:
Is that right?
1029
00:35:51.189 --> 00:35:53.122
TEDDY:
Well, you didn't...
1030
00:35:53.124 --> 00:35:55.291
you didn't hear it right,
'cause I would never say that
1031
00:35:55.293 --> 00:35:57.260
about people that I don't know.
1032
00:35:57.262 --> 00:35:59.162
You know what?
This is a perfect segue.
1033
00:35:59.164 --> 00:36:01.530
I'll just follow your lead,
and I'll stand up.
1034
00:36:01.532 --> 00:36:03.031
I am Teddy Walker.
1035
00:36:03.033 --> 00:36:06.002
Uh, a little fun fact about me:
I actually went here.
1036
00:36:06.004 --> 00:36:08.738
- Oh.
- I'm also newly engaged.
1037
00:36:08.740 --> 00:36:10.605
His fiancée is out
of his league.
1038
00:36:10.607 --> 00:36:11.740
I'm sorry, what?
1039
00:36:11.742 --> 00:36:12.841
Nothing. You're doing great.
1040
00:36:12.843 --> 00:36:14.110
I said, "Keep going.
1041
00:36:14.112 --> 00:36:15.811
Everybody loves you."
1042
00:36:15.813 --> 00:36:17.613
CARRIE: How does
your fiancée feel about
1043
00:36:17.615 --> 00:36:18.614
you being in night school?
1044
00:36:18.616 --> 00:36:19.782
(HIGH-PITCHED):
Oh, she good.
1045
00:36:19.784 --> 00:36:21.918
She loves it.
1046
00:36:21.920 --> 00:36:23.919
(CHUCKLES)
He ain't told her shit.
1047
00:36:23.921 --> 00:36:25.121
TEDDY:
She loves it.
1048
00:36:25.123 --> 00:36:26.655
I noticed that your voice
1049
00:36:26.657 --> 00:36:28.156
just went up a whole octave.
1050
00:36:28.158 --> 00:36:31.626
Now, from my studies
of psychology in grad school,
1051
00:36:31.628 --> 00:36:34.563
I know that that means
that you're bullshitting.
1052
00:36:34.565 --> 00:36:35.931
Ain't no bullshit in me.
1053
00:36:35.933 --> 00:36:37.899
I tell you what...
if you're lying with her,
1054
00:36:37.901 --> 00:36:40.068
- don't lie to her.
- But I don't... I don't lie.
1055
00:36:40.070 --> 00:36:41.738
Sound like some bullshit to me.
1056
00:36:41.740 --> 00:36:43.006
Everyone sees
right through you.
1057
00:36:43.008 --> 00:36:44.573
- Okay, how about we...?
- Mm-hmm.
1058
00:36:44.575 --> 00:36:46.641
If we go by your theory
about the voice thing...
1059
00:36:46.643 --> 00:36:47.976
I think that we're...
I think that we're all
1060
00:36:47.978 --> 00:36:49.278
- getting off track.
- ...he's lied four times.
1061
00:36:49.280 --> 00:36:51.079
This boy definitely lying.
1062
00:36:51.081 --> 00:36:53.116
- I am not.
- You can't outsmart Mother Nature.
1063
00:36:53.118 --> 00:36:54.350
And that's what...
that-that's what a woman is.
1064
00:36:54.352 --> 00:36:56.685
- Brother.
- Especially a black woman.
1065
00:36:56.687 --> 00:36:57.987
- You know, how...
- That's correct.
1066
00:36:57.989 --> 00:36:59.921
- Girls are smart, dude.
- Goddamn it.
1067
00:36:59.923 --> 00:37:00.756
- Like, literally, damn it.
- (OTHERS MURMURING)
1068
00:37:00.758 --> 00:37:02.624
Even if he didn't tell her,
so what?
1069
00:37:02.626 --> 00:37:03.692
- Okay, here's the thing.
- I told Randy
1070
00:37:03.694 --> 00:37:05.762
that he was the first guy
I slept with... not true.
1071
00:37:05.764 --> 00:37:07.330
Hey, I'm trying to introduce
myself, and I can't...
1072
00:37:07.332 --> 00:37:09.198
You don't respect your queen,
'cause if you did,
1073
00:37:09.200 --> 00:37:10.866
- that bitch would know where you at.
- Okay.
1074
00:37:10.868 --> 00:37:12.268
Teddy.
1075
00:37:12.270 --> 00:37:13.235
Don't lie to your queen.
1076
00:37:13.237 --> 00:37:14.369
- Okay, guys.
- JAYLEN: If you're busting off
1077
00:37:14.371 --> 00:37:17.140
in her guts like that,
she might be carrying your seed.
1078
00:37:17.142 --> 00:37:18.274
I feel like
this conversation...
1079
00:37:18.276 --> 00:37:19.841
So you ain't just lying to her;
you lying to your child.
1080
00:37:19.843 --> 00:37:21.044
- Shit!
- If it's your bottom bitch,
1081
00:37:21.046 --> 00:37:22.044
she know you stupid, fam.
1082
00:37:22.046 --> 00:37:24.046
- All I'm saying, fam, look-look...
- Forget it.
1083
00:37:24.048 --> 00:37:26.114
- Okay.
- How your fiancée don't know where you at?
1084
00:37:26.116 --> 00:37:27.682
It's after dark. (CHUCKLES)
1085
00:37:27.684 --> 00:37:28.851
This ain't Halloween, fam.
1086
00:37:28.853 --> 00:37:29.986
I'm done.
1087
00:37:29.988 --> 00:37:32.221
My sister know
where I'm at, okay?
1088
00:37:32.223 --> 00:37:34.623
And she live all the way
in Arkansas.
1089
00:37:34.625 --> 00:37:36.825
Okay. Here's the deal, class.
1090
00:37:36.827 --> 00:37:39.728
You will be given homework
every night
1091
00:37:39.730 --> 00:37:41.197
just like regular high school.
1092
00:37:41.199 --> 00:37:42.764
- (GROANS)
- And now...
1093
00:37:42.766 --> 00:37:44.267
a pop quiz
1094
00:37:44.269 --> 00:37:47.936
just so I can get a better idea
of where you all are.
1095
00:37:47.938 --> 00:37:50.005
Wait, wait. We got a...
we got a test on the first day?
1096
00:37:50.007 --> 00:37:53.109
Teddy, it's a pop quiz, okay?
1097
00:37:53.111 --> 00:37:54.410
Look here, folks.
1098
00:37:54.412 --> 00:37:57.879
I am here to teach
if you're here to learn.
1099
00:37:57.881 --> 00:38:01.416
Otherwise, you can get out
of my class right now.
1100
00:38:01.418 --> 00:38:03.285
That's what's up.
1101
00:38:03.287 --> 00:38:05.589
Welcome to night school.
1102
00:38:08.259 --> 00:38:10.659
There you go.
1103
00:38:10.661 --> 00:38:12.427
It was terrible, man.
Terrible!
1104
00:38:12.429 --> 00:38:13.929
Like, she's not like
the teachers
1105
00:38:13.931 --> 00:38:15.330
that we had back in the day.
1106
00:38:15.332 --> 00:38:17.400
- What?
- This woman is a brick wall,
1107
00:38:17.402 --> 00:38:18.967
and I can't...
I can't work her.
1108
00:38:18.969 --> 00:38:21.236
I can't work a brick wall.
1109
00:38:21.238 --> 00:38:22.204
What are you...
what are you doing?
1110
00:38:22.206 --> 00:38:24.272
I'm working out.
I'm trying to shed some LBs.
1111
00:38:24.274 --> 00:38:26.674
- I want to feel fit.
- Uh, why am I even asking?
1112
00:38:26.676 --> 00:38:28.977
In the meantime, please stop
paying for everything,
1113
00:38:28.979 --> 00:38:31.447
and you have to get a temp job.
1114
00:38:31.449 --> 00:38:33.849
- You don't think I've been looking for a job?
- (WHIMPERS)
1115
00:38:33.851 --> 00:38:36.184
What are you, crazy?
I'm on a treadmill.
1116
00:38:36.186 --> 00:38:38.286
The jobs that I want,
they are not
1117
00:38:38.288 --> 00:38:40.755
going to give
to a high school dropout.
1118
00:38:40.757 --> 00:38:42.358
Well, you can't keep
lying to Lisa.
1119
00:38:42.360 --> 00:38:43.559
Okay?
You know what, I'm gonna go
1120
00:38:43.561 --> 00:38:45.827
on Monster.com right now,
see if anything new popped up.
1121
00:38:45.829 --> 00:38:48.063
What are you going...
what are you going to find
1122
00:38:48.065 --> 00:38:49.364
- on Monster.com?
- Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
1123
00:38:49.366 --> 00:38:50.965
Okay, here we go.
"Sales associate wanted.
1124
00:38:50.967 --> 00:38:52.968
Marketing skills a must."
1125
00:38:52.970 --> 00:38:54.903
And... wait for it.
1126
00:38:54.905 --> 00:38:57.139
"No GED required." (LAUGHS)
1127
00:38:57.141 --> 00:38:59.241
You gotta jump on this, man.
This is perfect.
1128
00:38:59.243 --> 00:39:00.908
(PASSING VEHICLE HONKING HORN)
1129
00:39:00.910 --> 00:39:02.845
♪
1130
00:39:05.416 --> 00:39:07.351
(HORN HONKING)
1131
00:39:14.458 --> 00:39:16.994
It's chicken from the Lord.
1132
00:39:18.095 --> 00:39:19.861
So he... so he made it?
1133
00:39:19.863 --> 00:39:21.331
Yes, sir, he did.
1134
00:39:22.499 --> 00:39:24.132
Yeah.
1135
00:39:24.134 --> 00:39:26.033
I-I can...
I can work with this.
1136
00:39:26.035 --> 00:39:28.136
- You can?
- Yeah.
1137
00:39:28.138 --> 00:39:30.038
Basically,
what you want to do...
1138
00:39:30.040 --> 00:39:33.108
you want to... you want to
uplift your customers' palate.
1139
00:39:33.110 --> 00:39:34.742
- Yes, sir.
- When they bite
1140
00:39:34.744 --> 00:39:36.877
into your food,
you want their taste buds
1141
00:39:36.879 --> 00:39:38.946
to scream out, "Hallelujah!"
1142
00:39:38.948 --> 00:39:40.115
Preach it, Brother Teddy.
1143
00:39:40.117 --> 00:39:41.449
You are a godsend.
1144
00:39:41.451 --> 00:39:43.018
I'm a salesman, man.
1145
00:39:43.020 --> 00:39:44.386
That's what I do, okay?
1146
00:39:44.388 --> 00:39:46.787
Now, when it comes to titles,
I don't even care.
1147
00:39:46.789 --> 00:39:48.390
"Marketing director"...
that's up to you.
1148
00:39:48.392 --> 00:39:51.091
"WWJD," at this point.
"What would Jesus do?"
1149
00:39:51.093 --> 00:39:52.394
- Yes, sir.
- The one thing that I ask
1150
00:39:52.396 --> 00:39:53.929
is for you to be flexible
with the hours,
1151
00:39:53.931 --> 00:39:55.363
'cause I'm getting my GED.
1152
00:39:55.365 --> 00:39:57.165
You are bettering yourself,
Brother Teddy.
1153
00:39:57.167 --> 00:39:59.334
- Yeah.
- That's what being a Christian is all about.
1154
00:39:59.336 --> 00:40:01.135
Yeah, amen to that.
1155
00:40:01.137 --> 00:40:02.136
(CHUCKLING):
Amen.
1156
00:40:02.138 --> 00:40:03.706
- Yeah.
- Glory be.
1157
00:40:04.875 --> 00:40:06.243
This should fit you perfectly.
1158
00:40:07.544 --> 00:40:08.543
Brother Teddy,
1159
00:40:08.545 --> 00:40:10.445
I have been waiting on the Lord
1160
00:40:10.447 --> 00:40:12.347
to bring me a pint-sized
little man like you
1161
00:40:12.349 --> 00:40:15.818
to fill this out,
and here you are.
1162
00:40:17.187 --> 00:40:19.020
I'm-I'm not gonna do that.
1163
00:40:19.022 --> 00:40:22.089
Brother Isaac,
I-I'm a black man.
1164
00:40:22.091 --> 00:40:25.392
I can't put on
a chicken suit in 2018
1165
00:40:25.394 --> 00:40:27.928
and stand on the side
of a highway
1166
00:40:27.930 --> 00:40:30.098
and hawk no goddamn chicken.
1167
00:40:30.100 --> 00:40:31.566
Now, if the marketing position
isn't what you
1168
00:40:31.568 --> 00:40:32.933
had in mind, we can figure...
1169
00:40:32.935 --> 00:40:34.068
- (ORGAN PLAYING)
- What is going on?
1170
00:40:34.070 --> 00:40:36.203
You know what? We're gonna
have to put a pin in that.
1171
00:40:36.205 --> 00:40:37.938
- Is that a fire drill?
- All right, everybody.
1172
00:40:37.940 --> 00:40:39.473
Let's gather round.
The hour is upon us.
1173
00:40:39.475 --> 00:40:40.976
Where's the closest exit?
1174
00:40:40.978 --> 00:40:43.044
- It is time to pray.
- It's time to what?
1175
00:40:43.046 --> 00:40:45.045
It's time to pray.
Gather round.
1176
00:40:45.047 --> 00:40:46.914
Goddamn. What is your deal?
1177
00:40:46.916 --> 00:40:49.216
- What's...? Hey, lady.
- Dear Lord: We thank you
1178
00:40:49.218 --> 00:40:50.484
for bringing little Teddy to us
1179
00:40:50.486 --> 00:40:51.819
- here this morning.
- MAN: Yes, sir.
1180
00:40:51.821 --> 00:40:53.021
This little chickadee...
1181
00:40:53.023 --> 00:40:54.222
- Huh?
- ...is gonna share the word
1182
00:40:54.224 --> 00:40:55.956
about your precious poultry
with the world.
1183
00:40:55.958 --> 00:40:57.891
What I'm not gonna do
is do it in...
1184
00:40:57.893 --> 00:40:59.260
Ma'am, ma'am.
1185
00:40:59.262 --> 00:41:01.295
Strong hands!
1186
00:41:01.297 --> 00:41:03.097
Excuse me!
1187
00:41:03.099 --> 00:41:06.000
What I'm not gonna do is do it
in the chick... Goddamn.
1188
00:41:06.002 --> 00:41:07.101
Brother Teddy...
1189
00:41:07.103 --> 00:41:08.370
- He's in you.
- (GRUNTING QUIETLY)
1190
00:41:08.372 --> 00:41:09.471
He's in you, ain't he?
1191
00:41:09.473 --> 00:41:10.871
Chicken suit or not,
1192
00:41:10.873 --> 00:41:12.506
we are all praying together
right now
1193
00:41:12.508 --> 00:41:14.842
that you're gonna find
your nest here with us today.
1194
00:41:14.844 --> 00:41:16.910
- Okay.
- Amen and amen.
1195
00:41:16.912 --> 00:41:19.179
- GROUP: Amen!
- (MURMURING)
1196
00:41:19.181 --> 00:41:20.114
MAN:
Amen. Yes, sir!
1197
00:41:20.116 --> 00:41:21.148
- Welcome, Brother Teddy.
- (TEDDY MUTTERING)
1198
00:41:21.150 --> 00:41:23.183
ISAAC: All right, everybody,
this is a big day.
1199
00:41:23.185 --> 00:41:25.152
Hey, brother, let me holler
at you real quick.
1200
00:41:25.154 --> 00:41:26.453
Are y'all in the Sunken Place?
1201
00:41:26.455 --> 00:41:28.189
Let's share Jesus
through our food. Let's go.
1202
00:41:28.191 --> 00:41:29.591
The lunch rush is upon us.
1203
00:41:29.593 --> 00:41:30.991
What... lunch rush?
1204
00:41:30.993 --> 00:41:32.092
It's 10:00 a.m.
1205
00:41:32.094 --> 00:41:33.460
I don't understand
1206
00:41:33.462 --> 00:41:34.962
how that could be considered
a lunch rush.
1207
00:41:34.964 --> 00:41:36.597
Trust me, Brother Teddy.
1208
00:41:36.599 --> 00:41:39.333
Okay, if there... if-if there's
any way that I can just talk
1209
00:41:39.335 --> 00:41:41.336
- to you about the...
- Good morning, ladies.
1210
00:41:41.338 --> 00:41:42.537
Hello, Cinnamon.
1211
00:41:42.539 --> 00:41:43.538
Roxy.
1212
00:41:43.540 --> 00:41:44.972
Hello, ladies.
1213
00:41:44.974 --> 00:41:46.307
Tootie, how was the shift?
1214
00:41:46.309 --> 00:41:47.875
Hollywood, how you doing?
1215
00:41:47.877 --> 00:41:49.443
Good to see you, Leigh.
1216
00:41:49.445 --> 00:41:51.111
Hello, Veronica,
how was your shift?
1217
00:41:51.113 --> 00:41:53.881
Roxy, good to see you.
1218
00:41:53.883 --> 00:41:55.818
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
1219
00:42:02.558 --> 00:42:04.592
CARRIE: <i>Now, from your first
night of homework,</i>
1220
00:42:04.594 --> 00:42:09.063
you all should be very familiar
with the Pythagorean theorem.
1221
00:42:09.065 --> 00:42:10.297
All right? Say it with me.
1222
00:42:10.299 --> 00:42:11.532
"Pythagorean..."
1223
00:42:11.534 --> 00:42:12.566
GROUP:
"Pythagorean."
1224
00:42:12.568 --> 00:42:13.567
"Pathygorinean."
1225
00:42:13.569 --> 00:42:14.967
- "Theorem."
- GROUP: "Theorem."
1226
00:42:14.969 --> 00:42:16.103
- "Theorem."
- That's how you say it.
1227
00:42:16.105 --> 00:42:17.505
That's what it is.
1228
00:42:17.507 --> 00:42:19.973
Hey, yo, Bobby, watch out, fam!
1229
00:42:19.975 --> 00:42:22.009
- My God.
- Oh!
1230
00:42:22.011 --> 00:42:23.243
- BOBBY: What?!
- Ooh.
1231
00:42:23.245 --> 00:42:25.145
- (GRUNTING AND GROANING)
- Oh!
1232
00:42:25.147 --> 00:42:27.981
- (SHOUTING AND HOLLERING)
- MILA: Shit.
1233
00:42:27.983 --> 00:42:30.084
BOBBY: Can't you see
I'm trying to learn?
1234
00:42:30.086 --> 00:42:31.653
Someone ought to call the cops.
1235
00:42:31.655 --> 00:42:33.987
- What's happening?
- BOBBY: Take that!
1236
00:42:33.989 --> 00:42:35.489
- (ALARM BLARING)
- (YELLING)
1237
00:42:35.491 --> 00:42:37.224
- Ooh!
- Jesus.
1238
00:42:37.226 --> 00:42:38.925
BOBBY:
Get off me! Get off me!
1239
00:42:38.927 --> 00:42:40.361
He's getting up, he's
getting up, he's getting up.
1240
00:42:40.363 --> 00:42:41.563
Watch out, fam!
Behind you, nigga!
1241
00:42:41.565 --> 00:42:43.430
- Oh, my God.
- Oh!
1242
00:42:43.432 --> 00:42:44.998
Oh, he just kicked him
in the...
1243
00:42:45.000 --> 00:42:46.266
- Oh, my God!
- Oh!
1244
00:42:46.268 --> 00:42:49.168
- (LAUGHING)
- (GRUNTING AND GROANING)
1245
00:42:49.170 --> 00:42:50.571
- Oh! Enough!
- BOBBY: Yeah! Yeah!
1246
00:42:50.573 --> 00:42:52.039
Finish him! Step on his head!
1247
00:42:52.041 --> 00:42:53.207
(MAN SCREAMING)
1248
00:42:53.209 --> 00:42:54.641
- Come here. Break it up.
- Come on!
1249
00:42:54.643 --> 00:42:56.643
- Up!
- (GRUNTING AND GROANING)
1250
00:42:56.645 --> 00:42:58.412
- Hey, come on!
- Oh, hey, man!
1251
00:42:58.414 --> 00:42:59.513
I didn't do shit.
1252
00:42:59.515 --> 00:43:01.615
That's the stuff right there.
1253
00:43:01.617 --> 00:43:03.383
Reminds me of the old days.
1254
00:43:03.385 --> 00:43:06.086
- (BOBBY SIGHS)
- (ALARM CONTINUES BLARING)
1255
00:43:06.088 --> 00:43:08.455
They had the wrong guy.
1256
00:43:08.457 --> 00:43:10.224
- Please continue.
- You sure you cool,
1257
00:43:10.226 --> 00:43:11.658
or do we need to just chill
1258
00:43:11.660 --> 00:43:13.627
and wait for you
to make a new shank?
1259
00:43:13.629 --> 00:43:17.030
Please continue
with the Pythagorean...
1260
00:43:17.032 --> 00:43:18.599
"theory-em."
1261
00:43:18.601 --> 00:43:21.068
O-Okay.
1262
00:43:21.070 --> 00:43:22.736
You know what we
ought to do for Bobby?
1263
00:43:22.738 --> 00:43:25.204
We should get him, like,
some smokes,
1264
00:43:25.206 --> 00:43:26.740
'cause that stuff
is like currency in prison.
1265
00:43:26.742 --> 00:43:28.108
That and ass.
1266
00:43:28.110 --> 00:43:29.443
CARRIE:
Okay, here we go.
1267
00:43:29.445 --> 00:43:32.045
So, this is what we call
a right triangle.
1268
00:43:32.047 --> 00:43:35.549
And we already know the value
of two sides of the triangle.
1269
00:43:35.551 --> 00:43:38.151
- Oh...
- That should make it very easy for us
1270
00:43:38.153 --> 00:43:40.554
- to calculate the hypotenuse.
- Mmm, mmm.
1271
00:43:40.556 --> 00:43:44.725
A-squared plus B-squared
equals C-squared.
1272
00:43:44.727 --> 00:43:46.092
Say that with me, guys.
1273
00:43:46.094 --> 00:43:48.762
ALL:
A-squared plus B-squared
1274
00:43:48.764 --> 00:43:51.264
- equals C-squared.
- (CHUCKLING)
1275
00:43:51.266 --> 00:43:53.267
Very good. Uh, Teddy?
1276
00:43:53.269 --> 00:43:54.735
You seem to be getting
a real kick out of this.
1277
00:43:54.737 --> 00:43:56.770
She got you, Teddy!
1278
00:43:56.772 --> 00:43:59.105
You want to come up
and solve the problem?
1279
00:43:59.107 --> 00:44:00.542
Busted!
1280
00:44:03.178 --> 00:44:05.112
If, uh, that's what you...
1281
00:44:05.114 --> 00:44:07.381
if that's what you
want me to do.
1282
00:44:07.383 --> 00:44:08.315
(ECHOING):
Come on up.
1283
00:44:08.317 --> 00:44:09.716
MACKENZIE: Come on, Teddy.
You got this.
1284
00:44:09.718 --> 00:44:10.717
(CLAPPING)
1285
00:44:10.719 --> 00:44:12.351
You got this, Teddy.
Teddy!
1286
00:44:12.353 --> 00:44:14.187
Teddy! Teddy!
1287
00:44:14.189 --> 00:44:16.690
Teddy! Ted, Teddy, Teddy!
1288
00:44:16.692 --> 00:44:19.295
♪
1289
00:44:24.032 --> 00:44:26.167
CARRIE (ECHOING):
Find the value of C.
1290
00:44:39.347 --> 00:44:40.616
You know what?
1291
00:44:41.617 --> 00:44:43.417
(GRUNTING RAPIDLY)
1292
00:44:43.419 --> 00:44:45.552
I think there's something
in here.
1293
00:44:45.554 --> 00:44:48.454
(IMITATING AIR HORN BLARING)
1294
00:44:48.456 --> 00:44:51.426
Yo, yo, yo!
What up, my night school?
1295
00:44:52.528 --> 00:44:55.261
Who you looking for, fam?
1296
00:44:55.263 --> 00:44:57.129
I'm the principal
of this high school,
1297
00:44:57.131 --> 00:44:59.634
and I'm just dropping by
to check on...
1298
00:45:01.269 --> 00:45:02.702
What is he doing here?
1299
00:45:02.704 --> 00:45:05.772
I'm studying to get my GED,
like everybody else.
1300
00:45:05.774 --> 00:45:10.109
So, if you don't mind, I'd like
to get back to learning.
1301
00:45:10.111 --> 00:45:11.677
(CHUCKLES)
1302
00:45:11.679 --> 00:45:13.479
STEWART:
Of course.
1303
00:45:13.481 --> 00:45:14.614
My apologies for interrupting.
1304
00:45:14.616 --> 00:45:16.148
Thank you.
1305
00:45:16.150 --> 00:45:19.418
Actually,
I would like to observe
1306
00:45:19.420 --> 00:45:21.354
for a minute, if that's okay.
1307
00:45:21.356 --> 00:45:24.524
Please, continue solving
the problem.
1308
00:45:24.526 --> 00:45:26.327
Forget I'm here.
1309
00:45:27.629 --> 00:45:28.664
Cool.
1310
00:45:29.765 --> 00:45:31.631
That's fine with me.
1311
00:45:31.633 --> 00:45:33.867
Okay, so if I'm gonna do this,
1312
00:45:33.869 --> 00:45:35.868
let's do it step by step.
Let's make sure we do it right.
1313
00:45:35.870 --> 00:45:38.504
First things first...
let's get rid of this line.
1314
00:45:38.506 --> 00:45:39.773
(CHUCKLING)
1315
00:45:39.775 --> 00:45:41.340
Because it's written sloppy.
1316
00:45:41.342 --> 00:45:43.242
- So let's get that baby in there.
- (HUSHED): Eight.
1317
00:45:43.244 --> 00:45:44.277
Right?
1318
00:45:44.279 --> 00:45:45.411
- Huh.
- We got these three sides.
1319
00:45:45.413 --> 00:45:47.380
Got A, B, C. Let's split that.
1320
00:45:47.382 --> 00:45:48.581
That's there.
1321
00:45:48.583 --> 00:45:49.715
- Take these twos away.
- Mmm...
1322
00:45:49.717 --> 00:45:51.216
He don't know the answer.
1323
00:45:51.218 --> 00:45:53.252
Because that's what
confuses you.
1324
00:45:53.254 --> 00:45:56.188
And then...
1325
00:45:56.190 --> 00:45:57.757
- I'm realizing what it is.
- Eight!
1326
00:45:57.759 --> 00:45:59.191
The answer's five.
1327
00:45:59.193 --> 00:46:00.459
It's five.
1328
00:46:00.461 --> 00:46:01.861
Easy.
1329
00:46:01.863 --> 00:46:03.897
Okay, you're looking
at five-squared.
1330
00:46:03.899 --> 00:46:06.165
Me up here, I don't have time.
1331
00:46:06.167 --> 00:46:08.367
I don't have time.
Why do I even waste my time?
1332
00:46:08.369 --> 00:46:09.802
I don't have
time to waste my time
1333
00:46:09.804 --> 00:46:11.203
on the Pythagorean theorem.
It's simple.
1334
00:46:11.205 --> 00:46:12.438
- It's simple.
- STEWART: Wow.
1335
00:46:12.440 --> 00:46:15.575
That is very impressive, Teddy.
1336
00:46:15.577 --> 00:46:17.376
Very impressive.
1337
00:46:17.378 --> 00:46:20.479
I look forward to seeing
how you do on the midterm.
1338
00:46:20.481 --> 00:46:21.881
My midterm.
1339
00:46:21.883 --> 00:46:23.749
All right.
1340
00:46:23.751 --> 00:46:25.585
CARRIE:
Are we done here, Stewart,
1341
00:46:25.587 --> 00:46:28.621
or do you want to teach the
rest of the class for tonight?
1342
00:46:28.623 --> 00:46:30.256
Carry on, Carrie.
1343
00:46:30.258 --> 00:46:32.258
I don't like his attitude.
1344
00:46:32.260 --> 00:46:34.161
You all have a wonderful class.
1345
00:46:35.396 --> 00:46:37.797
- JAYLEN: Oy!
- MACKENZIE: What?
1346
00:46:37.799 --> 00:46:40.499
MILA:
God, that guy is a douchebag.
1347
00:46:40.501 --> 00:46:42.401
Are we just gonna gloss
over the fact
1348
00:46:42.403 --> 00:46:44.737
that we just watched
a prison fight?
1349
00:46:44.739 --> 00:46:46.806
- MACKENZIE: How many classes do we have left?
- (SIGHING)
1350
00:46:46.808 --> 00:46:49.574
LUIS: I actually have to work
for four hours right now.
1351
00:46:49.576 --> 00:46:52.812
I can give you a ride home
for ten bucks, if you want.
1352
00:46:52.814 --> 00:46:54.647
Hey, Carrie. Hey.
1353
00:46:54.649 --> 00:46:55.881
(SIGHS)
1354
00:46:55.883 --> 00:46:57.650
That was real cool what you did
1355
00:46:57.652 --> 00:46:59.351
for me in there
at the blackboard.
1356
00:46:59.353 --> 00:47:00.352
You know, that's what
I was talking about
1357
00:47:00.354 --> 00:47:01.887
when I just say
"watching out for each other."
1358
00:47:01.889 --> 00:47:04.557
You know, you scratch my back,
I'll scratch yours?
1359
00:47:04.559 --> 00:47:06.559
Oh, there's not gonna be any
more back-scratching, Teddy.
1360
00:47:06.561 --> 00:47:08.761
That's the last time
that happens.
1361
00:47:08.763 --> 00:47:11.764
And what was really going on
with you at the board anyways?
1362
00:47:11.766 --> 00:47:12.765
Nothing.
1363
00:47:12.767 --> 00:47:14.332
(CHUCKLES) Nothing.
1364
00:47:14.334 --> 00:47:16.569
No, I was just...
I wasn't prepared.
1365
00:47:16.571 --> 00:47:18.638
If you're not gonna
do the work, drop the class.
1366
00:47:18.640 --> 00:47:19.772
Why would you...?
No, Carrie.
1367
00:47:19.774 --> 00:47:21.741
Hey, I'm gonna do the work.
1368
00:47:21.743 --> 00:47:23.341
- You'll see.
- We'll see.
1369
00:47:23.343 --> 00:47:25.443
- Yes, we will.
- Great.
1370
00:47:25.445 --> 00:47:26.946
- Superb.
- Excellent.
1371
00:47:26.948 --> 00:47:28.347
- Good.
- Mm-hmm.
1372
00:47:28.349 --> 00:47:30.852
(EXHALING THROUGH LIPS)
1373
00:47:34.789 --> 00:47:36.688
Shit.
1374
00:47:36.690 --> 00:47:38.759
<i>Honey, I'm home.</i>
1375
00:47:42.997 --> 00:47:44.699
You sleeping?
1376
00:47:45.867 --> 00:47:47.467
- (LISA GRUNTS SOFTLY)
- You up?
1377
00:47:49.736 --> 00:47:51.739
(SIGHING)
1378
00:47:53.307 --> 00:47:54.407
(GRUNTS SOFTLY)
1379
00:47:54.409 --> 00:47:55.541
(CLEARS THROAT)
1380
00:47:55.543 --> 00:47:57.342
(SIGHS)
1381
00:47:57.344 --> 00:47:59.411
Excuse me.
1382
00:47:59.413 --> 00:48:01.346
Booty look good, don't it?
1383
00:48:01.348 --> 00:48:03.849
Too bad your face gonna be
in between them books
1384
00:48:03.851 --> 00:48:05.518
and not them cheeks.
1385
00:48:05.520 --> 00:48:07.019
(SIGHS, GROANS)
1386
00:48:07.021 --> 00:48:08.388
Go study.
1387
00:48:09.489 --> 00:48:10.555
(GROANS)
1388
00:48:10.557 --> 00:48:11.591
I don't want to study.
1389
00:48:12.859 --> 00:48:14.459
Mmm.
1390
00:48:14.461 --> 00:48:15.863
♪
1391
00:48:17.532 --> 00:48:19.865
Come on, Teddy. Focus.
1392
00:48:19.867 --> 00:48:21.299
Focus, Teddy.
1393
00:48:21.301 --> 00:48:22.436
- (CHAIR DRAGS ON FLOOR)
- Focus!
1394
00:48:25.772 --> 00:48:27.505
You'll never get it!
1395
00:48:27.507 --> 00:48:29.475
- (GRUNTS, SIGHS)
- Give it back!
1396
00:48:29.477 --> 00:48:31.609
LUIS:
<i>Hey, guys, this is my demo.</i>
1397
00:48:31.611 --> 00:48:33.511
♪ No matter what it takes,
you know ♪
1398
00:48:33.513 --> 00:48:35.447
♪ I'm always gonna
keep on fighting ♪
1399
00:48:35.449 --> 00:48:36.715
- ♪ I'm fighting...
- (PHONE BEEPS)
1400
00:48:36.717 --> 00:48:38.616
(CHUCKLES)
1401
00:48:38.618 --> 00:48:40.786
Little Mac! What are you doing?
1402
00:48:40.788 --> 00:48:42.320
That's my phone.
Those were my notes.
1403
00:48:42.322 --> 00:48:43.555
- You should be studying.
- (PHONE CLATTERS)
1404
00:48:43.557 --> 00:48:45.925
What the hell?
Don't be such a dick.
1405
00:48:45.927 --> 00:48:47.292
- You're gonna study!
- I hate you!
1406
00:48:47.294 --> 00:48:48.626
(GRUNTING)
1407
00:48:48.628 --> 00:48:49.928
What's the circumference
of that pizza?
1408
00:48:49.930 --> 00:48:50.929
The diameter.
1409
00:48:50.931 --> 00:48:53.498
Just tell me, how many
pepperonis on the pizza?
1410
00:48:53.500 --> 00:48:54.599
I'm giving you one star.
1411
00:48:54.601 --> 00:48:56.668
I'm gonna drop you off here
in a bad neighborhood.
1412
00:48:56.670 --> 00:48:57.769
How about that?
1413
00:48:57.771 --> 00:48:59.637
- (HORN HONKING)
- MAN: Theresa!
1414
00:48:59.639 --> 00:49:01.005
It's after 10:00. Hello!
1415
00:49:01.007 --> 00:49:02.372
That's my Randy.
1416
00:49:02.374 --> 00:49:03.943
Sweetest guy on earth.
1417
00:49:03.945 --> 00:49:06.078
Does anybody else want to try
to take a crack at this?
1418
00:49:06.080 --> 00:49:08.379
- I'm kind of busy right now.
- Mmm!
1419
00:49:08.381 --> 00:49:10.014
Babe, you seen my Wite-Out?
1420
00:49:10.016 --> 00:49:12.016
What the...? Oh, hell no.
1421
00:49:12.018 --> 00:49:13.618
Trina.
1422
00:49:13.620 --> 00:49:16.789
What-what-what-what,
you got robotic side dick now?
1423
00:49:16.791 --> 00:49:18.690
"Fat asses."
1424
00:49:18.692 --> 00:49:20.759
You know what fat asses like?
1425
00:49:20.761 --> 00:49:22.427
Dudes that have a real job.
1426
00:49:22.429 --> 00:49:24.362
- Teddy!
- Get your ass out.
1427
00:49:24.364 --> 00:49:26.530
Teddy, if you don't pass
that midterm,
1428
00:49:26.532 --> 00:49:28.433
no way homegirl stays with you.
1429
00:49:28.435 --> 00:49:29.869
Huh?
1430
00:49:29.871 --> 00:49:31.603
Think about that.
1431
00:49:31.605 --> 00:49:32.971
We're gonna have
to steal the test.
1432
00:49:32.973 --> 00:49:33.972
MACKENZIE:
Whoa.
1433
00:49:33.974 --> 00:49:35.440
Mind meld.
1434
00:49:35.442 --> 00:49:36.875
I was thinking
the exact same thing.
1435
00:49:36.877 --> 00:49:38.442
JAYLEN:
If we being real with it,
1436
00:49:38.444 --> 00:49:40.012
I need as much help
as I can get.
1437
00:49:40.014 --> 00:49:42.981
Going from capping bottles
to hypotenuses and all that,
1438
00:49:42.983 --> 00:49:45.483
I'm just as confounded
by the material
1439
00:49:45.485 --> 00:49:47.685
as the rest of y'all.
Feel me?
1440
00:49:47.687 --> 00:49:50.587
I really hate to admit it,
but with the language barrier
1441
00:49:50.589 --> 00:49:53.125
and all the Lyft driving
I've been doing,
1442
00:49:53.127 --> 00:49:54.926
I'm struggling as well, guys.
1443
00:49:54.928 --> 00:49:57.764
THERESA:
I think a caper sounds fun.
1444
00:49:59.499 --> 00:50:01.132
When'd you get here, Theresa?
1445
00:50:01.134 --> 00:50:03.001
Oh, I've been here
the whole time.
1446
00:50:03.003 --> 00:50:04.636
People never notice me.
1447
00:50:04.638 --> 00:50:06.504
It happens all the time.
It's...
1448
00:50:06.506 --> 00:50:08.907
kind of like a superpower,
but...
1449
00:50:08.909 --> 00:50:11.545
one that comes
with a crushing loneliness.
1450
00:50:14.814 --> 00:50:17.448
I'm blessed. I'm so blessed.
1451
00:50:17.450 --> 00:50:19.150
Yeah, God is good.
1452
00:50:19.152 --> 00:50:20.451
Mm-hmm.
1453
00:50:20.453 --> 00:50:21.920
TEDDY:
Okay.
1454
00:50:21.922 --> 00:50:24.055
Hey, Mila, what about you?
1455
00:50:24.057 --> 00:50:25.824
My parents are gonna be
really pissed
1456
00:50:25.826 --> 00:50:27.393
if I get busted again.
1457
00:50:28.728 --> 00:50:30.495
- Yeah, I'm in.
- MACKENZIE: I'm in.
1458
00:50:30.497 --> 00:50:31.429
- That's what I'm talking about.
- TEDDY: All right.
1459
00:50:31.431 --> 00:50:33.932
I just have one question
before we do this.
1460
00:50:33.934 --> 00:50:35.666
- What's up?
- Why does Teddy get to be
1461
00:50:35.668 --> 00:50:36.767
the ringleader, guys?
Come on.
1462
00:50:36.769 --> 00:50:38.535
- TEDDY: Goddamn it, Luis.
- Not now.
1463
00:50:38.537 --> 00:50:41.139
- I mean, seriously, man?
- It was his idea.
1464
00:50:41.141 --> 00:50:43.408
He knows this school
better than any of us.
1465
00:50:43.410 --> 00:50:45.076
Ah. Just never mind the fact
1466
00:50:45.078 --> 00:50:47.678
that I snuck
into a little place...
1467
00:50:47.680 --> 00:50:49.147
called America.
1468
00:50:49.149 --> 00:50:50.881
MACKENZIE:
Ha! That's true!
1469
00:50:50.883 --> 00:50:53.017
Luis is hot tonight.
1470
00:50:53.019 --> 00:50:54.986
♪
1471
00:50:54.988 --> 00:50:57.155
(YAWNS)
1472
00:50:57.157 --> 00:50:59.092
(SPORTSCASTER SPEAKS
INDISTINCTLY OVER PHONE)
1473
00:51:01.894 --> 00:51:05.163
(BUZZER SOUNDS, WHISTLE BLOWS
OVER PHONE)
1474
00:51:05.165 --> 00:51:07.100
♪
1475
00:51:09.169 --> 00:51:11.503
(DOOR CLATTERS SHUT)
1476
00:51:24.850 --> 00:51:27.019
(CHEWING LOUDLY)
1477
00:51:28.588 --> 00:51:30.121
- Yo, T.
- What?
1478
00:51:30.123 --> 00:51:31.856
I appreciate you bringing
1479
00:51:31.858 --> 00:51:33.757
this amazing, blazing
Satan chicken.
1480
00:51:33.759 --> 00:51:35.159
It's like, it's hot,
but it's not.
1481
00:51:35.161 --> 00:51:37.161
And I don't like spicy food,
but this one...
1482
00:51:37.163 --> 00:51:40.665
Let me tell you
what else is hot... your breath.
1483
00:51:40.667 --> 00:51:43.101
Why are you breathing on
the side of my face like that?
1484
00:51:43.103 --> 00:51:45.535
- Oh.
- You're smacking all in my ear, man. Stop.
1485
00:51:45.537 --> 00:51:47.138
(CHEWING LOUDLY)
1486
00:51:47.140 --> 00:51:48.705
You're still smacking.
1487
00:51:48.707 --> 00:51:50.507
Goddamn it, you're done.
You're done.
1488
00:51:50.509 --> 00:51:51.609
You're done with that.
1489
00:51:51.611 --> 00:51:53.878
- (SLURPING LOUDLY)
- Really?
1490
00:51:53.880 --> 00:51:55.712
God, what-what is
your problem, man?
1491
00:51:55.714 --> 00:51:58.216
- What?
- I said wear all black. Why didn't you wear black?
1492
00:51:58.218 --> 00:52:01.084
Laundry day.
All my darks were in the wash.
1493
00:52:01.086 --> 00:52:02.486
So you wore yellow?
1494
00:52:02.488 --> 00:52:03.821
It's fresh. It's clean.
1495
00:52:03.823 --> 00:52:05.790
Get your...
get your arm out my face.
1496
00:52:05.792 --> 00:52:07.158
Get out of my face.
1497
00:52:07.160 --> 00:52:09.060
Focus. Let's go.
1498
00:52:09.062 --> 00:52:10.796
Let's go.
1499
00:52:12.131 --> 00:52:13.797
Yo, Teddy,
what's the play, man?
1500
00:52:13.799 --> 00:52:15.800
Last night
I saw the janitor cleaning
1501
00:52:15.802 --> 00:52:17.902
Stewart's office
around 8:00 p.m.
1502
00:52:17.904 --> 00:52:20.038
I get it...
that's the inside man, huh?
1503
00:52:20.040 --> 00:52:22.039
No, Bobby,
he's not my inside man.
1504
00:52:22.041 --> 00:52:23.976
He's the janitor.
1505
00:52:26.178 --> 00:52:28.179
(RINGTONE PLAYING)
1506
00:52:28.181 --> 00:52:29.847
Oh, shit.
1507
00:52:29.849 --> 00:52:32.183
(WHISPERING): I got
to take this, I got to take it.
1508
00:52:32.185 --> 00:52:33.850
Sh-Shit.
1509
00:52:33.852 --> 00:52:36.253
Aw.
1510
00:52:36.255 --> 00:52:38.055
No, no, no.
1511
00:52:38.057 --> 00:52:39.993
(MUTTERING)
1512
00:52:43.029 --> 00:52:44.228
Hey, babe.
1513
00:52:44.230 --> 00:52:46.129
Hey, baby, I miss you.
1514
00:52:46.131 --> 00:52:47.931
Are you still at work?
1515
00:52:47.933 --> 00:52:51.768
Uh, yeah, yeah, right now I'm in
the, uh, I'm in the break room.
1516
00:52:51.770 --> 00:52:53.837
- (LAUGHS)
- Can I get a tour of the office?
1517
00:52:53.839 --> 00:52:56.274
If my baby wants a tour,
then she can get a tour.
1518
00:52:56.276 --> 00:52:57.975
- You always want to see something.
- Ah!
1519
00:52:57.977 --> 00:52:58.976
- If I...
- Oh, Teddy.
1520
00:52:58.978 --> 00:53:00.277
- Hey.
- Teddy, oh.
1521
00:53:00.279 --> 00:53:02.745
We got a situation here,
we got a real...
1522
00:53:02.747 --> 00:53:04.614
- (FARTS) - Hot lava, hot lava.
- What? Hey.
1523
00:53:04.616 --> 00:53:05.882
- Okay.
- Um...
1524
00:53:05.884 --> 00:53:07.718
Oh, God, oh, God,
oh, God, oh, God!
1525
00:53:07.720 --> 00:53:08.919
- Aah!
- Wha...?
1526
00:53:08.921 --> 00:53:10.053
God, turtle head sticking out.
1527
00:53:10.055 --> 00:53:11.321
- Oh, that's a big one.
- Uh...
1528
00:53:11.323 --> 00:53:13.689
- Babe, what is going on over there?
- MACKENZIE: Oh, big shit.
1529
00:53:13.691 --> 00:53:15.058
- Honey, that's, uh, that's actually...
- (FARTS)
1530
00:53:15.060 --> 00:53:16.960
...that's actually one
of my account managers.
1531
00:53:16.962 --> 00:53:17.794
(EXHALES SHARPLY)
1532
00:53:17.796 --> 00:53:19.896
Personalities
all over the office.
1533
00:53:19.898 --> 00:53:21.031
- Uh, nonstop laughs.
- (DIARRHEA SPLASHING)
1534
00:53:21.033 --> 00:53:22.332
- Hot lava!
- Nonstop.
1535
00:53:22.334 --> 00:53:23.934
You know how I do...
1536
00:53:23.936 --> 00:53:25.869
play around... at the office.
1537
00:53:25.871 --> 00:53:27.305
(MACKENZIE LAUGHS)
1538
00:53:27.307 --> 00:53:28.306
- Who's...?
- BOBBY: Hey, yo, what's up, bro?
1539
00:53:28.308 --> 00:53:30.274
You hung up on me, man.
1540
00:53:30.276 --> 00:53:32.075
- Who's that?
- That's one of my,
1541
00:53:32.077 --> 00:53:33.910
that's one of my clients there,
right there.
1542
00:53:33.912 --> 00:53:35.912
Yeah, we were, we were going
over his portfolio.
1543
00:53:35.914 --> 00:53:37.580
Kind of looks
like he's in prison.
1544
00:53:37.582 --> 00:53:39.983
Oh, my God,
you're so beautiful, baby.
1545
00:53:39.985 --> 00:53:41.651
TEDDY:
Well, he looks like that
1546
00:53:41.653 --> 00:53:43.954
- 'cause he is... insider trading.
- (FARTS)
1547
00:53:43.956 --> 00:53:45.789
He was wrongfully accused.
1548
00:53:45.791 --> 00:53:48.624
You're looking like J.Lo
<i>and</i> Beyoncé, mama.
1549
00:53:48.626 --> 00:53:50.293
Would you mind showing me
your privates?
1550
00:53:50.295 --> 00:53:51.762
Enough, Bobby.
1551
00:53:51.764 --> 00:53:53.096
Like, turn around,
let me see that ass,
1552
00:53:53.098 --> 00:53:54.631
please, a little tit, something.
1553
00:53:54.633 --> 00:53:55.966
Excuse me?
1554
00:53:55.968 --> 00:53:57.300
I'm, like,
really strong right now.
1555
00:53:57.302 --> 00:54:00.203
Like, I could do things to you...
legendary shit.
1556
00:54:00.205 --> 00:54:01.171
Enough, Bobby.
1557
00:54:01.173 --> 00:54:02.972
I'll take some upper thigh,
but, for real,
1558
00:54:02.974 --> 00:54:05.208
I really want
to see some punani.
1559
00:54:05.210 --> 00:54:06.176
Excuse me?
1560
00:54:06.178 --> 00:54:08.211
- (MACKENZIE GROANS)
- Listen... oh, my God.
1561
00:54:08.213 --> 00:54:09.279
MACKENZIE:
I don't know what you put in me.
1562
00:54:09.281 --> 00:54:10.280
It just hit me.
1563
00:54:10.282 --> 00:54:11.714
But it feels like the Devil!
1564
00:54:11.716 --> 00:54:14.083
It just hit me what he said,
honey.
1565
00:54:14.085 --> 00:54:15.319
He's saying "piñata."
1566
00:54:15.321 --> 00:54:17.654
Man, I ain't see some punani
in so long.
1567
00:54:17.656 --> 00:54:19.122
Bobby likes to hit piñatas.
1568
00:54:19.124 --> 00:54:20.656
- MACKENZIE: No!
- Let me... you know what I'm gonna do?
1569
00:54:20.658 --> 00:54:21.958
Let me, let me call you back.
1570
00:54:21.960 --> 00:54:22.893
- Uh...
- I love you,
1571
00:54:22.895 --> 00:54:25.095
and I... we'll do the tour
when I'm done.
1572
00:54:25.097 --> 00:54:26.929
Bye, babe.
1573
00:54:26.931 --> 00:54:28.231
What was that, Bobby?
1574
00:54:28.233 --> 00:54:30.000
Yo, Ted, good looking, bro.
1575
00:54:30.002 --> 00:54:31.368
That's my fiancée, man.
1576
00:54:31.370 --> 00:54:32.601
You don't talk to her like that.
1577
00:54:32.603 --> 00:54:36.339
When I go back to the cell,
I got the legendary socky-sock.
1578
00:54:36.341 --> 00:54:38.707
You're not having a sock session
to my woman.
1579
00:54:38.709 --> 00:54:40.177
That's, that's not going
to happen.
1580
00:54:40.179 --> 00:54:42.245
- I'm going all out.
- (MACKENZIE GRUNTS)
1581
00:54:42.247 --> 00:54:43.246
- (DIARRHEA SPLASHING)
- (STAMMERS)
1582
00:54:43.248 --> 00:54:44.814
Okay, what is in your ass, Mac?
1583
00:54:44.816 --> 00:54:46.782
MACKENZIE:
Cut me a break, man.
1584
00:54:46.784 --> 00:54:47.585
I've had enough!
1585
00:54:50.188 --> 00:54:52.322
Hold on a second,
we got a code red.
1586
00:54:52.324 --> 00:54:54.091
We got a code red.
1587
00:54:54.093 --> 00:54:55.859
Teddy, I got no toilet paper.
1588
00:54:55.861 --> 00:54:58.095
Toilet paper, Teddy,
one-time me!
1589
00:54:58.097 --> 00:54:59.129
One-time me!
1590
00:54:59.131 --> 00:55:00.898
Teddy!
1591
00:55:04.136 --> 00:55:06.136
(JANITOR SPRAYS CLEANER)
1592
00:55:06.138 --> 00:55:07.870
All right, guys, listen.
1593
00:55:07.872 --> 00:55:09.705
When the janitor exits,
1594
00:55:09.707 --> 00:55:11.408
we're gonna go out,
we're gonna catch the door.
1595
00:55:11.410 --> 00:55:13.309
And then we're gonna
enter quietly.
1596
00:55:13.311 --> 00:55:14.612
- Okay.
- Okay?
1597
00:55:15.881 --> 00:55:17.015
Wait a minute.
1598
00:55:18.016 --> 00:55:19.249
Where's Big Mac?
1599
00:55:19.251 --> 00:55:21.184
I thought he was with us.
1600
00:55:21.186 --> 00:55:23.085
He...
1601
00:55:23.087 --> 00:55:24.755
(SIGHS) Damn it.
1602
00:55:30.429 --> 00:55:31.896
What's he doing?
1603
00:55:33.132 --> 00:55:34.864
- (GRUNTING)
- (TEDDY GASPS)
1604
00:55:34.866 --> 00:55:37.299
(GRUNTING AND GROANING)
1605
00:55:37.301 --> 00:55:39.236
- Oh, my God.
- What are you doing?
1606
00:55:39.238 --> 00:55:41.039
- Come on, come on, come on, come on.
- Mac!
1607
00:55:43.275 --> 00:55:45.975
- Holy shit, it worked.
- Oh, my God!
1608
00:55:45.977 --> 00:55:47.143
- (LAUGHING)
- TEDDY: Mac!
1609
00:55:47.145 --> 00:55:48.244
Did you just kill him?
1610
00:55:48.246 --> 00:55:49.245
No, I didn't kill him.
1611
00:55:49.247 --> 00:55:50.246
I just choked him out.
1612
00:55:50.248 --> 00:55:51.281
You said no witnesses.
1613
00:55:51.283 --> 00:55:52.748
When did I say that?
1614
00:55:52.750 --> 00:55:54.119
You didn't say that?
1615
00:55:55.187 --> 00:55:56.219
Oh, God.
1616
00:55:56.221 --> 00:55:57.287
You know what?
1617
00:55:57.289 --> 00:55:58.888
I got my signals crossed.
1618
00:55:58.890 --> 00:56:00.723
There's a lot
of instructions, Teddy.
1619
00:56:00.725 --> 00:56:02.124
I didn't say anything about...
1620
00:56:02.126 --> 00:56:04.961
You know what?
You are going to fix this.
1621
00:56:04.963 --> 00:56:06.795
Do you hear me, Mac?
You're gonna hide this body.
1622
00:56:06.797 --> 00:56:08.831
- Chop him up?
- Hide...
1623
00:56:08.833 --> 00:56:10.733
- Burn it?
- Hide it.
1624
00:56:10.735 --> 00:56:11.736
Chop, burn, bury?
1625
00:56:14.305 --> 00:56:16.208
- Hey. Anybody got anything?
- No.
1626
00:56:17.742 --> 00:56:19.041
TEDDY: All right, Mila,
how we looking?
1627
00:56:19.043 --> 00:56:20.843
- (BUZZING)
- Keep looking.
1628
00:56:20.845 --> 00:56:23.479
- Suck my balls, Teddy! (LAUGHS)
- Shit.
1629
00:56:23.481 --> 00:56:25.814
- Shit.
- You should've seen your face.
1630
00:56:25.816 --> 00:56:28.118
- You look ridiculous.
- Shh!
1631
00:56:28.120 --> 00:56:29.852
MACKENZIE:
All right, I stashed the body,
1632
00:56:29.854 --> 00:56:31.887
and God willing, he'll wake up
in a couple hours.
1633
00:56:31.889 --> 00:56:33.856
Also, that baseball coach/
principal guy,
1634
00:56:33.858 --> 00:56:35.324
he's on his way.
1635
00:56:35.326 --> 00:56:37.326
TEDDY: What? Why wouldn't you
lead with that?
1636
00:56:37.328 --> 00:56:40.930
(QUIET CHATTER)
1637
00:56:40.932 --> 00:56:43.332
TEDDY:
Damn. It's the PTA meeting.
1638
00:56:43.334 --> 00:56:45.203
Oh, shit.
1639
00:56:46.337 --> 00:56:48.204
Theresa, you're up.
1640
00:56:48.206 --> 00:56:49.371
- What? What? I...
- Listen to me.
1641
00:56:49.373 --> 00:56:51.074
- Okay.
- I need you to go out there,
1642
00:56:51.076 --> 00:56:52.275
and I need you to stall.
1643
00:56:52.277 --> 00:56:53.809
Oh, no, no, no, no.
I can't flirt.
1644
00:56:53.811 --> 00:56:55.177
- I-I don't know any moves.
- I-I don't need that.
1645
00:56:55.179 --> 00:56:56.546
I haven't flirted
since like 1996, and even then,
1646
00:56:56.548 --> 00:56:58.314
it was like offering
to give the cop a handy
1647
00:56:58.316 --> 00:56:59.949
to get off a speeding ticket,
and guess what.
1648
00:56:59.951 --> 00:57:01.317
He didn't take it.
I'm bad at it.
1649
00:57:01.319 --> 00:57:02.551
That's not what
I'm asking you to do.
1650
00:57:02.553 --> 00:57:03.953
In my day,
it was really innocent.
1651
00:57:03.955 --> 00:57:05.422
Now it's all about the butt.
1652
00:57:05.424 --> 00:57:06.922
I heard a guy
the other day say,
1653
00:57:06.924 --> 00:57:09.825
"I'm gonna crack that butt
like a walnut."
1654
00:57:09.827 --> 00:57:11.826
- What?
- What does that even mean?
1655
00:57:11.828 --> 00:57:13.229
- Why would you start there?
- Stop it.
1656
00:57:13.231 --> 00:57:14.996
Wouldn't you want
to start in the front?
1657
00:57:14.998 --> 00:57:16.499
- Theresa, listen.
- With a nice missionary position,
1658
00:57:16.501 --> 00:57:18.467
- you know, some gentle touching.
- (TEDDY GROANS)
1659
00:57:18.469 --> 00:57:20.069
In my day,
maybe once in your lifetime,
1660
00:57:20.071 --> 00:57:21.904
you might get the end
of a pinky,
1661
00:57:21.906 --> 00:57:23.372
and that was the thrill
of a lifetime, okay?
1662
00:57:23.374 --> 00:57:25.274
Stop it.
That's a lot of information
1663
00:57:25.276 --> 00:57:26.841
that I did not need to know.
1664
00:57:26.843 --> 00:57:27.943
Yeah, that was a lot.
1665
00:57:27.945 --> 00:57:29.445
Go talk about bake sales.
1666
00:57:29.447 --> 00:57:31.013
- Mom stuff. Not-not butt stuff.
- Yeah, mom stuff.
1667
00:57:31.015 --> 00:57:32.848
- Go mom it.
- I-I'll try. I'll try.
1668
00:57:32.850 --> 00:57:34.183
- Okay? Okay.
- I can do that.
1669
00:57:34.185 --> 00:57:35.384
- Go, go.
- Got it. Okay.
1670
00:57:35.386 --> 00:57:38.820
Shit. Luis, go out there
before she puts
1671
00:57:38.822 --> 00:57:40.122
- something in her butt.
- Okay.
1672
00:57:40.124 --> 00:57:41.257
Okay?
1673
00:57:41.259 --> 00:57:43.060
(TAPPING)
1674
00:57:45.196 --> 00:57:46.462
What are you doing, Mac?
1675
00:57:46.464 --> 00:57:47.996
Looking for trapdoors.
1676
00:57:47.998 --> 00:57:50.466
(TAPPING CONTINUES)
1677
00:57:50.468 --> 00:57:52.368
I'm glad you're here, Mac.
1678
00:57:52.370 --> 00:57:53.335
Send it to me first, please.
1679
00:57:53.337 --> 00:57:54.136
- Right, right.
- We can e-mail you the rest.
1680
00:57:54.138 --> 00:57:55.004
'Cause I just want to...
Thank you.
1681
00:57:55.006 --> 00:57:56.171
- That would be great.
- I'll send out
1682
00:57:56.173 --> 00:57:58.340
- that e-mail tonight, okay?
- Yeah. Thank you so much.
1683
00:57:58.342 --> 00:57:59.575
- Okay, bye.
- Drive home safe.
1684
00:57:59.577 --> 00:58:01.175
Oh, hey.
1685
00:58:01.177 --> 00:58:02.411
Hi.
1686
00:58:02.413 --> 00:58:04.614
Thank you for that great,
wonderful meeting.
1687
00:58:04.616 --> 00:58:06.448
I'm sorry, do I know you?
1688
00:58:06.450 --> 00:58:08.384
I was in there. Remember?
1689
00:58:08.386 --> 00:58:09.618
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
1690
00:58:09.620 --> 00:58:11.853
- Hi. Mrs. Howerton.
- No, you, uh, just...
1691
00:58:11.855 --> 00:58:13.354
STEWART:
Mrs. Howerton. Yes, of course.
1692
00:58:13.356 --> 00:58:15.190
No, you brought up, uh,
several compelling issues.
1693
00:58:15.192 --> 00:58:16.525
I sure did.
1694
00:58:16.527 --> 00:58:18.260
STEWART:
Well, what can I help you with?
1695
00:58:18.262 --> 00:58:20.362
- She sucks at this. Hurry.
- I'm almost there.
1696
00:58:20.364 --> 00:58:23.064
So my child gets an assignment
about the solar system,
1697
00:58:23.066 --> 00:58:24.433
and it's to make a diorama,
1698
00:58:24.435 --> 00:58:26.100
and he doesn't know how
to make a diorama.
1699
00:58:26.102 --> 00:58:27.503
I'm the one
with the hot glue gun
1700
00:58:27.505 --> 00:58:29.371
in the middle of the night...
it's 11:00 p.m.
1701
00:58:29.373 --> 00:58:31.206
I mean, don't get me wrong,
we're blessed to go to
1702
00:58:31.208 --> 00:58:32.574
- school here, but I'm...
- I'm sorry, I have to go.
1703
00:58:32.576 --> 00:58:34.376
- Okay? Call my office.
- I will. - Hurry up.
1704
00:58:34.378 --> 00:58:35.411
I'm going, I'm going.
Calm down.
1705
00:58:35.413 --> 00:58:37.045
Come on, Mila.
1706
00:58:37.047 --> 00:58:38.279
You've made some great points,
1707
00:58:38.281 --> 00:58:40.382
but I have to go now.
Good night.
1708
00:58:40.384 --> 00:58:42.318
- Wait a minute.
- Thank you. I have to go.
1709
00:58:42.320 --> 00:58:44.520
- Okay, I really have to go.
- Wait. No. (GASPS)
1710
00:58:44.522 --> 00:58:45.920
- Wait, wait, wait.
- What?
1711
00:58:45.922 --> 00:58:47.456
- (THERESA SIGHS)
- Oh! Are you okay?
1712
00:58:47.458 --> 00:58:48.890
I feel faint.
1713
00:58:48.892 --> 00:58:50.391
Well, let's get you some water.
1714
00:58:50.393 --> 00:58:52.094
- Are you...?
- Thanks for catching me.
1715
00:58:52.096 --> 00:58:54.463
Of course. Are you all right?
1716
00:58:54.465 --> 00:58:56.498
- I...
- (MOANS SOFTLY)
1717
00:58:56.500 --> 00:58:58.434
Are you having a seizure?
1718
00:58:58.436 --> 00:59:00.501
(EXHALES, SLURPS)
1719
00:59:00.503 --> 00:59:02.437
Do you have something
in your teeth?
1720
00:59:02.439 --> 00:59:05.307
- I wish I had you in my teeth.
- No, no, no, no, no, no.
1721
00:59:05.309 --> 00:59:07.576
Okay, no, I didn't realize
that's what this was.
1722
00:59:07.578 --> 00:59:09.143
- No, thank you, ma'am.
- Gentle touching.
1723
00:59:09.145 --> 00:59:10.411
I am the principal
of your child's school.
1724
00:59:10.413 --> 00:59:11.680
- I have to walk away now, okay?
- I...
1725
00:59:11.682 --> 00:59:13.147
I'm in a loveless marriage.
Please.
1726
00:59:13.149 --> 00:59:14.248
I am not participating in this!
1727
00:59:14.250 --> 00:59:15.084
- You don't have to participate.
- To a professional.
1728
00:59:15.086 --> 00:59:17.018
I'll do it.
I'll do all the work.
1729
00:59:17.020 --> 00:59:18.287
- No, I'm... (SIGHS)
- I'll do it all.
1730
00:59:18.289 --> 00:59:19.488
- If you just...
- Ma'am.
1731
00:59:19.490 --> 00:59:20.622
- ...look me in the eyes...
- Ma'am, ma'am.
1732
00:59:20.624 --> 00:59:21.623
Not appropriate, okay?
1733
00:59:21.625 --> 00:59:22.624
- Okay, here it is.
- Okay?
1734
00:59:22.626 --> 00:59:23.692
If this is what you want.
1735
00:59:23.694 --> 00:59:24.692
This is what it's about
with you.
1736
00:59:24.694 --> 00:59:26.627
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
I'm not looking.
1737
00:59:26.629 --> 00:59:27.830
Crack it open like a walnut.
1738
00:59:27.832 --> 00:59:30.366
- Thank you. No, thank you.
- Crack that nut like a walnut.
1739
00:59:30.368 --> 00:59:31.533
Thank you. No, thank you.
1740
00:59:31.535 --> 00:59:33.602
- Crack that nut open.
- Thank you.
1741
00:59:33.604 --> 00:59:36.237
- No, thank you.
- Do what men do with women's asses.
1742
00:59:36.239 --> 00:59:37.438
- (SLAPPING)
- Oh, man.
1743
00:59:37.440 --> 00:59:38.239
- Just tap it!
- I can't...
1744
00:59:38.241 --> 00:59:39.041
I can't stand here
for this, okay?
1745
00:59:39.043 --> 00:59:40.041
- Give it a crack...
- Good night.
1746
00:59:40.043 --> 00:59:43.111
- Come on, give it some.
- (TAKING DEEP BREATHS)
1747
00:59:43.113 --> 00:59:45.279
Oh, that was so hard.
1748
00:59:45.281 --> 00:59:47.715
She wanted you so bad.
1749
00:59:47.717 --> 00:59:50.251
But you can't go there.
1750
00:59:50.253 --> 00:59:52.621
Principals have principles.
1751
00:59:52.623 --> 00:59:55.390
Mmm. Oh, but you know Stewie
1752
00:59:55.392 --> 00:59:57.158
would've tore
that ass up, though!
1753
00:59:57.160 --> 00:59:58.459
(CHUCKLES)
1754
00:59:58.461 --> 01:00:00.561
Not a black voice.
1755
01:00:00.563 --> 01:00:02.630
(STEWART CLEARS THROAT QUIETLY)
1756
01:00:02.632 --> 01:00:05.601
♪
1757
01:00:05.603 --> 01:00:08.336
STEWART (SIGHS):
Let's see.
1758
01:00:08.338 --> 01:00:10.173
(CLEARS THROAT)
1759
01:00:11.674 --> 01:00:14.611
(TYPING)
1760
01:00:26.389 --> 01:00:27.458
(STEWART SIGHS)
1761
01:00:32.328 --> 01:00:34.097
(GASPS SOFTLY)
1762
01:00:35.198 --> 01:00:36.699
(SNIFFS QUIETLY)
1763
01:00:42.572 --> 01:00:43.573
(STIFLED SNEEZE)
1764
01:00:44.707 --> 01:00:47.210
Hello? Hello?
1765
01:00:48.178 --> 01:00:49.412
Somebody in here?
1766
01:00:55.218 --> 01:00:56.619
I have a bat.
1767
01:00:57.687 --> 01:00:59.220
And I'm not afraid to use it.
1768
01:00:59.222 --> 01:01:02.222
If there is someone in here,
1769
01:01:02.224 --> 01:01:03.661
you are trespassing.
1770
01:01:04.728 --> 01:01:08.062
And I am well within my rights
1771
01:01:08.064 --> 01:01:09.564
to defend myself.
1772
01:01:09.566 --> 01:01:12.300
So come on out,
1773
01:01:12.302 --> 01:01:15.704
and I won't bash your head.
1774
01:01:15.706 --> 01:01:18.272
MAN (IN DISTANCE):
Help!
1775
01:01:18.274 --> 01:01:19.740
Anybody out there?
1776
01:01:19.742 --> 01:01:22.510
(BANGING ON DOOR IN DISTANCE)
1777
01:01:22.512 --> 01:01:24.211
Get me out of here!
1778
01:01:24.213 --> 01:01:25.713
- (BANGING CONTINUES)
- (MAN YELLS)
1779
01:01:25.715 --> 01:01:27.381
Whoa.
1780
01:01:27.383 --> 01:01:29.650
- Okay.
- What the hell, Mac?
1781
01:01:29.652 --> 01:01:31.752
- That was close.
- You're damn right it was, Mac.
1782
01:01:31.754 --> 01:01:33.154
I wonder why.
1783
01:01:33.156 --> 01:01:34.689
Yeah, I... well,
it's 'cause I sneezed.
1784
01:01:34.691 --> 01:01:36.156
I know what you did.
1785
01:01:36.158 --> 01:01:37.625
What?
1786
01:01:37.627 --> 01:01:39.128
I got it.
1787
01:01:41.164 --> 01:01:43.364
I really tried.
I even did the butt stuff.
1788
01:01:43.366 --> 01:01:45.198
I told you don't do
the butt stuff.
1789
01:01:45.200 --> 01:01:46.334
I don't know, fam,
might've worked.
1790
01:01:46.336 --> 01:01:48.368
Looked like he might've sauced
his drawers, real talk.
1791
01:01:48.370 --> 01:01:49.670
He what?
1792
01:01:49.672 --> 01:01:51.205
He-he was turned on.
1793
01:01:51.207 --> 01:01:52.273
Really?
1794
01:01:52.275 --> 01:01:53.341
Shit, I was, too.
1795
01:01:53.343 --> 01:01:54.342
Hey.
1796
01:01:54.344 --> 01:01:55.576
Thanks, Jaylen.
1797
01:01:55.578 --> 01:01:57.478
You got that little
eco-friendly vibe going.
1798
01:01:57.480 --> 01:01:58.713
What's eco-friendly?
1799
01:01:58.715 --> 01:02:00.146
Very little waste.
1800
01:02:00.148 --> 01:02:02.349
Oh, I thought you meant
her bush.
1801
01:02:02.351 --> 01:02:04.685
No. Oh, you know what?
I'm with that.
1802
01:02:04.687 --> 01:02:06.487
Hey, now! (LAUGHS)
1803
01:02:06.489 --> 01:02:07.722
Okay, Jaylen, Jaylen!
1804
01:02:07.724 --> 01:02:09.222
We gotta go, y'all. Let's go.
1805
01:02:09.224 --> 01:02:10.658
Yeah, let's go.
Come on, come on.
1806
01:02:10.660 --> 01:02:12.227
Shit.
1807
01:02:14.563 --> 01:02:15.796
(RATTLING)
1808
01:02:15.798 --> 01:02:17.832
MAN (MUFFLED):
Who's out there?
1809
01:02:17.834 --> 01:02:20.703
- (BANGING)
- Somebody help me, please.
1810
01:02:23.438 --> 01:02:25.105
- What happened?
- (PANTING)
1811
01:02:25.107 --> 01:02:26.673
I don't know.
Someone grabbed me from behind
1812
01:02:26.675 --> 01:02:28.543
and threw me in the slop sink.
1813
01:02:28.545 --> 01:02:30.545
Game face, Lonnie.
1814
01:02:30.547 --> 01:02:33.446
- (BEEP, CLUNK)
- We're on lockdown.
1815
01:02:33.448 --> 01:02:34.782
MACKENZIE (LAUGHING):
Ah, yeah!
1816
01:02:34.784 --> 01:02:37.284
- That'll get him. - Hey!
- (ALARM BLARING)
1817
01:02:37.286 --> 01:02:39.120
- Oh, shit.
- Go, go, go! - Hey!
1818
01:02:39.122 --> 01:02:41.656
Shit.
1819
01:02:41.658 --> 01:02:43.791
- What do we...? Hey.
- Shit.
1820
01:02:43.793 --> 01:02:46.226
Oh. Hey, Bobby.
1821
01:02:46.228 --> 01:02:48.562
Bobby, shit just got real, man,
what do we do?
1822
01:02:48.564 --> 01:02:50.697
Man, I don't know,
just don't get shot, bro.
1823
01:02:50.699 --> 01:02:51.832
What do you mean,
"don't get shot"?
1824
01:02:51.834 --> 01:02:53.701
Bobby, you're supposed
to be a hardened criminal, man.
1825
01:02:53.703 --> 01:02:55.536
That can't be your advice.
1826
01:02:55.538 --> 01:02:57.404
What the hell'd you go
to jail for, Bobby?
1827
01:02:57.406 --> 01:02:59.339
I robbed Whole Foods, bro.
1828
01:02:59.341 --> 01:03:00.740
I robbed Whole Foods.
1829
01:03:00.742 --> 01:03:02.175
That's your crime?
1830
01:03:02.177 --> 01:03:04.745
You went to jail
for stealing $15 lettuce?
1831
01:03:04.747 --> 01:03:06.581
No, bro, you're sleeping.
1832
01:03:06.583 --> 01:03:09.249
I moved some coke and some dope
in the day, but my kale game...
1833
01:03:09.251 --> 01:03:11.384
- my kale game...
- No.
1834
01:03:11.386 --> 01:03:12.385
Now, that's mean!
1835
01:03:12.387 --> 01:03:13.887
Grass-fed beef.
1836
01:03:13.889 --> 01:03:16.256
You don't know nothing
about no free-range chicken.
1837
01:03:16.258 --> 01:03:18.291
- Thug life! (STAMMERS)
- Jaylen, calm... calm down.
1838
01:03:18.293 --> 01:03:19.894
- And I had all the farmer markets on smash.
- No, no.
1839
01:03:19.896 --> 01:03:21.428
You don't get to explain.
1840
01:03:21.430 --> 01:03:23.296
You don't get to expla... Bye.
1841
01:03:23.298 --> 01:03:24.664
All right, y'all, this way.
1842
01:03:24.666 --> 01:03:25.665
STEWART (OVER P.A.):
Attention, intruders.
1843
01:03:25.667 --> 01:03:27.335
This is Principal Patowsky.
1844
01:03:27.337 --> 01:03:30.905
The exit doors are locked down.
There is no escape.
1845
01:03:30.907 --> 01:03:34.374
I-I can't believe we're gonna
die over a GED practice test.
1846
01:03:34.376 --> 01:03:35.642
- It's not even a real test.
- Listen.
1847
01:03:35.644 --> 01:03:37.544
I just did this
to get out of the house.
1848
01:03:37.546 --> 01:03:38.846
I thought this
was gonna be fun.
1849
01:03:38.848 --> 01:03:40.180
You know,
we're gonna break in...
1850
01:03:40.182 --> 01:03:41.414
Just shut up! Just shut up!
1851
01:03:41.416 --> 01:03:43.918
Shut up! Goddamn!
1852
01:03:43.920 --> 01:03:46.453
Been talking about your kids
and everything all day!
1853
01:03:46.455 --> 01:03:48.188
This ain't the time.
1854
01:03:48.190 --> 01:03:49.623
Now, y'all pull it together.
1855
01:03:49.625 --> 01:03:50.925
We are fine.
1856
01:03:50.927 --> 01:03:52.292
We-we... we are okay.
1857
01:03:52.294 --> 01:03:53.728
The roof. Let's hit the roof.
1858
01:03:53.730 --> 01:03:55.295
Okay, when I went
to school here,
1859
01:03:55.297 --> 01:03:56.496
that's how we got out
of school.
1860
01:03:56.498 --> 01:03:58.698
And then we would jump onto
the elementary school roof.
1861
01:03:58.700 --> 01:03:59.635
Come on!
1862
01:04:01.202 --> 01:04:03.671
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
1863
01:04:03.673 --> 01:04:05.238
- Move it, move it!
- This is a bad idea.
1864
01:04:05.240 --> 01:04:06.339
- Come on!
- This is a bad idea!
1865
01:04:06.341 --> 01:04:08.241
- Watch it, watch it.
- Whoa, whoa!
1866
01:04:08.243 --> 01:04:09.843
- Whoa, whoa!
- Whoa!
1867
01:04:09.845 --> 01:04:11.277
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Whoa.
1868
01:04:11.279 --> 01:04:12.479
- Oh, my God.
- Whoa, whoa!
1869
01:04:12.481 --> 01:04:13.713
Okay, back up.
1870
01:04:13.715 --> 01:04:15.215
- Listen to me.
- Come on!
1871
01:04:15.217 --> 01:04:16.784
Swear to you,
when I went to school here,
1872
01:04:16.786 --> 01:04:18.351
that jump did not seem
that high.
1873
01:04:18.353 --> 01:04:19.719
There's no way I can make that.
1874
01:04:19.721 --> 01:04:21.855
I can jump like three feet.
My knees and my back
1875
01:04:21.857 --> 01:04:23.923
are totally shot
from moving boxes, Teddy!
1876
01:04:23.925 --> 01:04:25.224
- All right.
- What are we gonna do?
1877
01:04:25.226 --> 01:04:26.225
- What are we gonna do?
- Listen, listen.
1878
01:04:26.227 --> 01:04:27.360
I got it.
1879
01:04:27.362 --> 01:04:28.728
Let's just say it's 15 feet.
1880
01:04:28.730 --> 01:04:29.864
Oh, God.
1881
01:04:29.866 --> 01:04:31.364
TEDDY:
Take that 15 feet,
1882
01:04:31.366 --> 01:04:33.233
minus the three feet
that you can jump.
1883
01:04:33.235 --> 01:04:34.467
What are you talking about?
1884
01:04:34.469 --> 01:04:36.736
All we gotta do is use
the Pythagorean theorem.
1885
01:04:36.738 --> 01:04:37.704
Nobody was listening in class.
1886
01:04:37.706 --> 01:04:39.539
- Nobody knows how to do that.
- Oh, my God.
1887
01:04:39.541 --> 01:04:40.774
No, wait, wait, wait.
Carrie said... Carrie said,
1888
01:04:40.776 --> 01:04:41.976
in order to do
the Pythagorean theorem,
1889
01:04:41.978 --> 01:04:43.743
you-you have to know
the hypotenuse.
1890
01:04:43.745 --> 01:04:46.346
All we gotta do
is hypotenuse it.
1891
01:04:46.348 --> 01:04:47.947
A-squared plus B-squared
equals C-squared.
1892
01:04:47.949 --> 01:04:49.716
If you know... know two sides,
1893
01:04:49.718 --> 01:04:51.018
then that'll help you
figure out the third,
1894
01:04:51.020 --> 01:04:52.686
so it's roughly
six feet across,
1895
01:04:52.688 --> 01:04:55.388
and 15-squared is 225
divided by six-squared...
1896
01:04:55.390 --> 01:04:56.890
- Hypotenuse it!
- Wait, what did I just say?
1897
01:04:56.892 --> 01:04:58.357
- MACKENZIE: It's 36.
- Yeah, 36.
1898
01:04:58.359 --> 01:04:59.726
But you don't divide it.
You add it.
1899
01:04:59.728 --> 01:05:01.360
So, what did I just say?
The, um... the, uh...
1900
01:05:01.362 --> 01:05:02.594
- She's the best one at math.
- Wait, no, uh...
1901
01:05:02.596 --> 01:05:03.797
- Hypotenuse it!
- No, no, you can do this.
1902
01:05:03.799 --> 01:05:05.865
- By six-squared, then... I-I don't know.
- No.
1903
01:05:05.867 --> 01:05:07.333
No, come on. You got this.
1904
01:05:07.335 --> 01:05:08.802
(OTHERS YELLING)
1905
01:05:08.804 --> 01:05:10.402
- Oh, my God!
- (WHOOPING AND YELLING)
1906
01:05:10.404 --> 01:05:12.538
- Mila!
- Oh, my God!
1907
01:05:12.540 --> 01:05:14.607
Oh!
1908
01:05:14.609 --> 01:05:15.642
- You all right?
- Guys!
1909
01:05:15.644 --> 01:05:17.410
It's not a hard math problem.
1910
01:05:17.412 --> 01:05:18.745
It's a simple physics problem.
1911
01:05:18.747 --> 01:05:19.946
Just jump.
1912
01:05:19.948 --> 01:05:21.981
Did you...
did you hypotenuse it?
1913
01:05:21.983 --> 01:05:23.717
Yeah, I hypotenused it.
1914
01:05:23.719 --> 01:05:25.350
Can you just jump?
1915
01:05:25.352 --> 01:05:26.853
Mac, you're up next.
1916
01:05:26.855 --> 01:05:28.521
- No. No.
- Yes.
1917
01:05:28.523 --> 01:05:30.390
Mac, don't you
give me that, okay?
1918
01:05:30.392 --> 01:05:31.958
When I think "man,"
I think you.
1919
01:05:31.960 --> 01:05:35.327
I think about how proud
Little Mac must be.
1920
01:05:35.329 --> 01:05:37.030
I want you to do
what you do best
1921
01:05:37.032 --> 01:05:38.363
and go be great.
1922
01:05:38.365 --> 01:05:40.633
Okay. Yeah.
1923
01:05:40.635 --> 01:05:42.435
Get across that roof, Mac.
1924
01:05:42.437 --> 01:05:43.670
- Yeah! Okay!
- All right?
1925
01:05:43.672 --> 01:05:44.871
- All right.
- You got this.
1926
01:05:44.873 --> 01:05:47.040
Mac coming in! Step back!
1927
01:05:47.042 --> 01:05:48.875
- Let's go, Mac.
- Thank you, Teddy.
1928
01:05:48.877 --> 01:05:50.844
Any time.
1929
01:05:50.846 --> 01:05:52.312
Mac attack!
1930
01:05:52.314 --> 01:05:54.013
(SCREAMING)
1931
01:05:54.015 --> 01:05:55.314
Mac attack!
1932
01:05:55.316 --> 01:05:57.316
♪ Owner of a lonely heart...
1933
01:05:57.318 --> 01:05:59.518
(SCREAMING CONTINUES)
1934
01:05:59.520 --> 01:06:00.987
(GROANS, SCREAMS)
1935
01:06:00.989 --> 01:06:02.889
(ALL YELLING)
1936
01:06:02.891 --> 01:06:05.492
(GASPING)
1937
01:06:05.494 --> 01:06:06.226
Shit!
1938
01:06:06.228 --> 01:06:07.894
- (BONES CRACKING)
- (GROANS)
1939
01:06:07.896 --> 01:06:09.095
Oh, God!
1940
01:06:09.097 --> 01:06:10.496
Oh, Teddy!
1941
01:06:10.498 --> 01:06:12.598
- Oh, why'd I listen to you?
- Shit.
1942
01:06:12.600 --> 01:06:14.032
You were so convincing!
1943
01:06:14.034 --> 01:06:16.402
- I'm sorry, buddy.
- Hey.
1944
01:06:16.404 --> 01:06:17.937
My arm's kind of tingly.
1945
01:06:17.939 --> 01:06:19.906
- I think I might have hurt it.
- (REPRESSED GAGGING)
1946
01:06:19.908 --> 01:06:21.573
Feels weird, man.
1947
01:06:21.575 --> 01:06:23.344
His damn shoulder
is in his mouth.
1948
01:06:24.879 --> 01:06:26.413
(SCREAMS)
1949
01:06:29.618 --> 01:06:30.683
Oh!
1950
01:06:30.685 --> 01:06:32.051
JAYLEN:
Hey.
1951
01:06:32.053 --> 01:06:33.819
Big Mac, man,
I'm sorry about that.
1952
01:06:33.821 --> 01:06:36.922
That hot chicken, it just
kind of got on rewind, man.
1953
01:06:36.924 --> 01:06:38.625
- (WHIMPERS)
- It was either the back or the front,
1954
01:06:38.627 --> 01:06:40.593
and I just got
these pants, fam.
1955
01:06:40.595 --> 01:06:43.765
Oh, God, I'm having
the worst night!
1956
01:06:46.134 --> 01:06:47.768
(DOOR OPENS)
1957
01:06:50.872 --> 01:06:52.739
(DOOR CLOSES)
1958
01:06:52.741 --> 01:06:54.675
♪
1959
01:06:59.947 --> 01:07:01.914
(GASPS, GRUNTS)
1960
01:07:01.916 --> 01:07:04.416
Hello, Teddy.
1961
01:07:04.418 --> 01:07:05.854
Huh?
1962
01:07:08.389 --> 01:07:09.922
Hey, babe.
1963
01:07:09.924 --> 01:07:12.424
You don't need
to "hey, babe" me.
1964
01:07:12.426 --> 01:07:14.028
(GULPS)
1965
01:07:15.664 --> 01:07:17.464
I know what's going on.
1966
01:07:19.533 --> 01:07:20.467
What's, uh, um...
1967
01:07:21.569 --> 01:07:22.570
What's going on?
1968
01:07:24.104 --> 01:07:25.904
The late hours?
1969
01:07:25.906 --> 01:07:27.408
The secrecy?
1970
01:07:28.742 --> 01:07:30.176
Just admit it, Teddy.
1971
01:07:30.178 --> 01:07:31.810
Just admit what?
1972
01:07:31.812 --> 01:07:32.947
It's so obvious.
1973
01:07:35.082 --> 01:07:36.650
You're getting cold feet.
1974
01:07:37.785 --> 01:07:39.420
(SIGHS)
1975
01:07:40.588 --> 01:07:41.789
(LAUGHING)
1976
01:07:43.557 --> 01:07:45.593
Yeah!
1977
01:07:46.694 --> 01:07:47.993
Cold feet?
1978
01:07:47.995 --> 01:07:50.864
Ever since you proposed,
you haven't been yourself.
1979
01:07:50.866 --> 01:07:52.497
(CLEARS THROAT) Cold feet?
1980
01:07:52.499 --> 01:07:56.935
Lisa, I am not getting
cold feet.
1981
01:07:56.937 --> 01:07:59.671
In fact, it's the...
it's the complete opposite.
1982
01:07:59.673 --> 01:08:01.006
My feet are very warm.
1983
01:08:01.008 --> 01:08:02.942
I want this.
1984
01:08:02.944 --> 01:08:04.443
And I apologize.
1985
01:08:04.445 --> 01:08:05.911
I apologize if things have been
1986
01:08:05.913 --> 01:08:08.447
a little crazy as of late,
but, babe,
1987
01:08:08.449 --> 01:08:10.148
you gotta know
that I am out here.
1988
01:08:10.150 --> 01:08:12.117
I'm-I'm... I'm trying.
1989
01:08:12.119 --> 01:08:16.655
Okay? I am busting my ass
every day, every night,
1990
01:08:16.657 --> 01:08:18.191
for us.
1991
01:08:18.193 --> 01:08:20.158
For me and you.
1992
01:08:20.160 --> 01:08:22.027
I'm in a different world
out there, babe.
1993
01:08:22.029 --> 01:08:24.796
And this world
is stressing me out.
1994
01:08:24.798 --> 01:08:28.734
It is stressing me out.
1995
01:08:28.736 --> 01:08:29.935
(SIGHS)
1996
01:08:29.937 --> 01:08:31.603
I'm sorry I doubted you.
1997
01:08:31.605 --> 01:08:34.006
I-I know this career change
has been a lot.
1998
01:08:34.008 --> 01:08:36.041
It's a lot.
1999
01:08:36.043 --> 01:08:38.744
It's so much.
2000
01:08:38.746 --> 01:08:41.046
It's so, so much.
2001
01:08:41.048 --> 01:08:42.883
Poor baby.
2002
01:08:44.251 --> 01:08:47.152
(TAKES DEEP BREATH)
2003
01:08:47.154 --> 01:08:48.454
- I love you.
- Oh.
2004
01:08:53.060 --> 01:08:54.862
I love you, too.
2005
01:08:57.698 --> 01:08:59.264
TEDDY:
<i>Does that complete your order?</i>
2006
01:08:59.266 --> 01:09:01.066
- (BABY CRYING OVER SPEAKER)
- WOMAN: Oh, wait, h-hold up.
2007
01:09:01.068 --> 01:09:02.267
- I don't want that apple pie.
- Yeah, I can't... I'm sorry.
2008
01:09:02.269 --> 01:09:03.635
It's-it's kind of hard
to hear you.
2009
01:09:03.637 --> 01:09:04.770
There's a baby
in the background.
2010
01:09:04.772 --> 01:09:06.138
Baby, I said be quiet.
Sit down!
2011
01:09:06.140 --> 01:09:07.739
Yeah, say-say it
one more time for me.
2012
01:09:07.741 --> 01:09:09.207
- Say it... say it again.
- Is that burger good or what?
2013
01:09:09.209 --> 01:09:11.076
TEDDY: Is there any way
I can get you to respectfully
2014
01:09:11.078 --> 01:09:12.677
- shut that baby up?
- What'd you say?
2015
01:09:12.679 --> 01:09:14.846
- Just pull up to the window, for the love...
- Heck no!
2016
01:09:14.848 --> 01:09:16.615
Oh. Shit.
2017
01:09:16.617 --> 01:09:17.883
- Shit.
- STEWART: It won't work.
2018
01:09:17.885 --> 01:09:19.084
I see you, Teddy.
2019
01:09:19.086 --> 01:09:20.584
It's not working.
2020
01:09:20.586 --> 01:09:23.654
Teddy Walker
behind the soda machine.
2021
01:09:23.656 --> 01:09:24.989
- WOMAN: Hello?
- Shit.
2022
01:09:24.991 --> 01:09:27.526
Teddy Walker.
I see you looking at...
2023
01:09:27.528 --> 01:09:28.593
We're making eye contact
right now.
2024
01:09:28.595 --> 01:09:30.262
Open your eyes, Teddy.
2025
01:09:30.264 --> 01:09:32.697
- Teddy, come here!
- Stewart.
2026
01:09:32.699 --> 01:09:33.932
Hey.
2027
01:09:33.934 --> 01:09:35.067
Stewart,
you were saying "Teddy"?
2028
01:09:35.069 --> 01:09:36.268
About ten times.
2029
01:09:36.270 --> 01:09:37.635
- Hey.
- Hey.
2030
01:09:37.637 --> 01:09:38.637
- Do me a favor.
- Yep.
2031
01:09:38.639 --> 01:09:40.539
Uh, go over there
and handle that situation
2032
01:09:40.541 --> 01:09:41.472
- at the drive-through.
- Uh-huh.
2033
01:09:41.474 --> 01:09:42.975
And I'll tell you
what to do after that,
2034
01:09:42.977 --> 01:09:44.042
because I'm in charge.
2035
01:09:44.044 --> 01:09:45.743
- Hey, so...
- WOMAN: Hello?
2036
01:09:45.745 --> 01:09:47.545
Give me a second. M-Ma'am...
2037
01:09:47.547 --> 01:09:49.013
- I said I didn't want the pie.
- Okay, ma'am, ma...
2038
01:09:49.015 --> 01:09:49.947
- She don't want the pie.
- Uh-uh.
2039
01:09:49.949 --> 01:09:51.850
Take the pie off.
She want to get the...
2040
01:09:51.852 --> 01:09:53.151
WOMAN:
I said I ain't getting a pie.
2041
01:09:53.153 --> 01:09:54.219
- TEDDY: Pull up!
- You heard me.
2042
01:09:54.221 --> 01:09:55.686
- Pull up to the window!
- All right.
2043
01:09:55.688 --> 01:09:57.022
TEDDY:
When she pull up, tell me,
2044
01:09:57.024 --> 01:09:58.956
'cause I'm gonna come punch
the baby in the face.
2045
01:09:58.958 --> 01:10:01.125
God don't see everything.
Just let me know.
2046
01:10:01.127 --> 01:10:05.063
Hey, talk to me, man.
How you doing?
2047
01:10:05.065 --> 01:10:07.065
You know, I thought
it was the Woodbridge punks
2048
01:10:07.067 --> 01:10:09.800
that broke into the school,
but now it all makes sense.
2049
01:10:09.802 --> 01:10:12.903
I found this
2050
01:10:12.905 --> 01:10:14.508
at the scene of the crime.
2051
01:10:15.876 --> 01:10:17.242
So, what'd you do, huh?
2052
01:10:17.244 --> 01:10:18.310
Break into my computer?
2053
01:10:18.312 --> 01:10:20.145
- (CHUCKLES)
- Steal the midterm?
2054
01:10:20.147 --> 01:10:21.712
Being a little paranoid,
aren't we, Stew?
2055
01:10:21.714 --> 01:10:23.315
- Am I?
- Stewart, that's a plastic bag
2056
01:10:23.317 --> 01:10:25.649
with a chicken wrapper in it
with the word "evidence"
2057
01:10:25.651 --> 01:10:28.053
written on it, which is
probably in your handwriting.
2058
01:10:28.055 --> 01:10:31.123
It's not exactly
a smoking gun, Stew.
2059
01:10:31.125 --> 01:10:33.158
It's just a coincidence, right?
2060
01:10:33.160 --> 01:10:34.259
Probably.
2061
01:10:34.261 --> 01:10:36.027
If you stole that test,
2062
01:10:36.029 --> 01:10:37.862
I will find out, Teddy.
2063
01:10:37.864 --> 01:10:40.832
I'm an honest man trying
to make an honest living.
2064
01:10:40.834 --> 01:10:43.667
Teddy Walker does not cheat.
2065
01:10:43.669 --> 01:10:45.071
You cheated.
2066
01:10:46.973 --> 01:10:48.973
Every last one of you...
2067
01:10:48.975 --> 01:10:50.742
cheated.
2068
01:10:50.744 --> 01:10:52.877
Uh... whoa.
2069
01:10:52.879 --> 01:10:55.247
Carrie, those are
very strong accusations.
2070
01:10:55.249 --> 01:10:57.382
For real. Like, what?
2071
01:10:57.384 --> 01:10:58.749
I'm offended.
2072
01:10:58.751 --> 01:11:00.918
Well, I'll take note
of that, Teddy.
2073
01:11:00.920 --> 01:11:03.088
Which one of you want
to own up to it?
2074
01:11:03.090 --> 01:11:04.755
I'm offended, too.
2075
01:11:04.757 --> 01:11:06.191
Bobby?
2076
01:11:06.193 --> 01:11:07.625
You a criminal.
2077
01:11:07.627 --> 01:11:08.726
You obviously not good at it.
2078
01:11:08.728 --> 01:11:10.027
That's why you in jail.
2079
01:11:10.029 --> 01:11:11.996
Did you orchestrate
this whole thing?
2080
01:11:11.998 --> 01:11:14.732
I mean, why you gonna
pick on me and profile me?
2081
01:11:14.734 --> 01:11:16.734
I'm the only one
locked up here.
2082
01:11:16.736 --> 01:11:18.836
So, if I'm locked up in here,
2083
01:11:18.838 --> 01:11:21.372
how can I be out there
stealing the test, Miss Carrie?
2084
01:11:21.374 --> 01:11:23.074
CARRIE:
Oh, oh, wait a minute.
2085
01:11:23.076 --> 01:11:24.108
Y'all stole the test?
2086
01:11:24.110 --> 01:11:25.209
I'm not saying nothing.
2087
01:11:25.211 --> 01:11:26.311
I don't know nothing.
2088
01:11:26.313 --> 01:11:27.845
I don't know shit.
2089
01:11:27.847 --> 01:11:29.046
'Cause I never said nothing
2090
01:11:29.048 --> 01:11:30.648
about anybody
stealing the test.
2091
01:11:30.650 --> 01:11:32.983
We're about to get
to the truth.
2092
01:11:32.985 --> 01:11:34.952
Who stole the test?
2093
01:11:34.954 --> 01:11:36.719
Mac?
2094
01:11:36.721 --> 01:11:40.024
You want to explain to me
how you got a perfect score?
2095
01:11:40.026 --> 01:11:41.426
Here's the thing, all right?
2096
01:11:41.428 --> 01:11:44.261
I know I didn't get
a perfect score,
2097
01:11:44.263 --> 01:11:45.729
because I missed a few
on purpose.
2098
01:11:45.731 --> 01:11:46.730
Oh, fudge.
2099
01:11:46.732 --> 01:11:48.365
(CARRIE CHUCKLES)
2100
01:11:48.367 --> 01:11:50.335
Thank you!
2101
01:11:50.337 --> 01:11:51.869
You's a snitch, Mac.
2102
01:11:51.871 --> 01:11:53.438
Snitches are bitches.
2103
01:11:53.440 --> 01:11:55.806
I don't like cheaters.
2104
01:11:55.808 --> 01:11:59.944
And I hate that I am teaching
a room full of cheaters.
2105
01:11:59.946 --> 01:12:02.179
I don't like men that cheat.
2106
01:12:02.181 --> 01:12:03.814
I don't like women that cheat.
2107
01:12:03.816 --> 01:12:05.116
I don't even deal
with politicians.
2108
01:12:05.118 --> 01:12:07.151
You know why?
'Cause they all cheaters.
2109
01:12:07.153 --> 01:12:08.786
I don't even eat Cheetos.
2110
01:12:08.788 --> 01:12:10.687
You know why? 'Cause it
sound like "cheaters."
2111
01:12:10.689 --> 01:12:13.090
Plus that Cheeto dust
will give you that Trump color.
2112
01:12:13.092 --> 01:12:15.159
- Yeah.
- It's hard to get that Cheeto dust
2113
01:12:15.161 --> 01:12:17.027
off your hands.
2114
01:12:17.029 --> 01:12:18.896
It'll mess up your Girbauds.
2115
01:12:18.898 --> 01:12:20.798
You know, I liked you at first.
2116
01:12:20.800 --> 01:12:22.133
I'm done with all of y'all.
2117
01:12:22.135 --> 01:12:24.068
All of y'all can get up
out my class.
2118
01:12:24.070 --> 01:12:25.402
- I'm done with y'all.
- What?
2119
01:12:25.404 --> 01:12:27.204
Okay, Carrie, let me...
I want to say something.
2120
01:12:27.206 --> 01:12:29.206
What about my GED? He's gonna
drop out of high school.
2121
01:12:29.208 --> 01:12:31.408
If I don't get my GED,
I'm going to prison.
2122
01:12:31.410 --> 01:12:32.810
I need this GED.
2123
01:12:32.812 --> 01:12:33.978
You need to keep
your booty closed.
2124
01:12:33.980 --> 01:12:35.446
That's what you need to do.
You in jail.
2125
01:12:35.448 --> 01:12:36.980
No, I need this GED.
2126
01:12:36.982 --> 01:12:38.181
We can't live
on Randy's salary.
2127
01:12:38.183 --> 01:12:39.417
Please don't make me go home.
2128
01:12:39.419 --> 01:12:40.753
I hate my kids.
2129
01:12:41.821 --> 01:12:44.288
But I love being a mom.
2130
01:12:44.290 --> 01:12:46.756
I'm blessed. I'm so blessed.
2131
01:12:46.758 --> 01:12:48.392
LUIS:
Carrie, please.
2132
01:12:48.394 --> 01:12:50.059
I cannot live a lifetime
2133
01:12:50.061 --> 01:12:52.129
of driving around drunks
in a Corolla.
2134
01:12:52.131 --> 01:12:53.497
JAYLEN: Look, the last thing
I want to do
2135
01:12:53.499 --> 01:12:55.232
is be cleaning the rooms
at the Best Western.
2136
01:12:55.234 --> 01:12:56.433
Okay? 'Cause all that...
2137
01:12:56.435 --> 01:12:57.901
Especially
them short-stay rooms,
2138
01:12:57.903 --> 01:12:59.470
'cause you know
what that is, right?
2139
01:12:59.472 --> 01:13:01.505
That's just gonna be
used condoms, soiled sheets.
2140
01:13:01.507 --> 01:13:03.376
Ain't that where you met
your bottom bitch at?
2141
01:13:05.778 --> 01:13:07.744
You know Trina?
2142
01:13:07.746 --> 01:13:08.978
Mm-hmm.
2143
01:13:08.980 --> 01:13:10.414
She got a fat ass, too.
2144
01:13:10.416 --> 01:13:13.283
You know what? All of you
got little sob stories,
2145
01:13:13.285 --> 01:13:14.985
but y'all should've thought
about that
2146
01:13:14.987 --> 01:13:16.989
before you went
and stole the test.
2147
01:13:19.258 --> 01:13:21.125
Just get the hell up out
of my class.
2148
01:13:21.127 --> 01:13:24.761
(STUDENTS CLAMORING)
2149
01:13:24.763 --> 01:13:27.064
THERESA:
It's not sob stories. No!
2150
01:13:27.066 --> 01:13:28.499
I'm-I'm the one who wants
to get my life together.
2151
01:13:28.501 --> 01:13:30.267
Let-let-let me tell you
something about Jay.
2152
01:13:30.269 --> 01:13:33.102
- (CLAMORING CONTINUES)
- CARRIE: Get out!
2153
01:13:33.104 --> 01:13:35.439
Get out! Get out!
2154
01:13:35.441 --> 01:13:36.973
- All of y'all...
- It was me.
2155
01:13:36.975 --> 01:13:38.074
- And I... Hey.
- (CLAMORING STOPS)
2156
01:13:38.076 --> 01:13:39.912
It was me.
2157
01:13:42.281 --> 01:13:44.181
Shouldn't be mad
at none of them.
2158
01:13:44.183 --> 01:13:45.982
I mean, yeah,
they looked at the answers,
2159
01:13:45.984 --> 01:13:47.953
but they wouldn't have
if I hadn't put it on their lap.
2160
01:13:49.354 --> 01:13:51.222
I take responsibility
for it all.
2161
01:13:51.224 --> 01:13:53.224
I was the mastermind.
I orchestrated the whole thing.
2162
01:13:53.226 --> 01:13:54.227
It was all me.
2163
01:13:55.328 --> 01:13:56.826
Thank you.
2164
01:13:56.828 --> 01:13:58.562
Thank you, Teddy.
2165
01:13:58.564 --> 01:14:00.897
I appreciate your honesty.
2166
01:14:00.899 --> 01:14:02.866
I'm just trying
to do what's right, Carrie.
2167
01:14:02.868 --> 01:14:05.069
Now you can get the hell out
of my class.
2168
01:14:05.071 --> 01:14:07.003
Huh?
2169
01:14:07.005 --> 01:14:08.938
Hit the road, Jack.
2170
01:14:08.940 --> 01:14:12.041
Don't let the doorknob hit you
where the good Lord split you.
2171
01:14:12.043 --> 01:14:13.543
I thought that when I said
all that stuff,
2172
01:14:13.545 --> 01:14:14.945
that you would listen to it.
2173
01:14:14.947 --> 01:14:16.113
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
2174
01:14:16.115 --> 01:14:17.414
You gets no second chances
up in here.
2175
01:14:17.416 --> 01:14:18.582
Not with me no more.
2176
01:14:18.584 --> 01:14:20.417
Uh-uh. I ain't got
your back no more.
2177
01:14:20.419 --> 01:14:22.852
- You don't even want to be here.
- I do want to be here.
2178
01:14:22.854 --> 01:14:24.187
You don't even
want to be here, Teddy.
2179
01:14:24.189 --> 01:14:26.223
- No.
- And as for the rest of you,
2180
01:14:26.225 --> 01:14:27.924
I want you to think
long and hard
2181
01:14:27.926 --> 01:14:30.394
about if you really want this.
2182
01:14:30.396 --> 01:14:32.128
(SIGHS)
2183
01:14:32.130 --> 01:14:34.199
Class dismissed.
2184
01:14:36.968 --> 01:14:38.369
"Find a solution for the..."
2185
01:14:38.371 --> 01:14:40.069
(CRYING):
I don't know none of this shit.
2186
01:14:40.071 --> 01:14:41.070
I need you.
2187
01:14:41.072 --> 01:14:44.474
- I need your help.
- Put your damn hand down.
2188
01:14:44.476 --> 01:14:46.276
I'm going to Rainbows
before they close.
2189
01:14:46.278 --> 01:14:48.444
That's emotional shopping,
Carrie.
2190
01:14:48.446 --> 01:14:50.147
It's Rainbows, motherfucker.
2191
01:14:50.149 --> 01:14:51.417
Shit is cheap.
2192
01:14:53.419 --> 01:14:56.052
(LONG SIGH)
2193
01:14:56.054 --> 01:14:58.421
Teddy, Teddy, Teddy.
2194
01:14:58.423 --> 01:15:00.922
You are stupid.
2195
01:15:00.924 --> 01:15:03.960
She didn't know what was
going on until you admitted it.
2196
01:15:03.962 --> 01:15:05.396
We had her right up
till the end,
2197
01:15:05.398 --> 01:15:08.431
and then Teddy,
old brick head...
2198
01:15:08.433 --> 01:15:10.900
- (BOOK STRIKES MACKENZIE)
- Oh, Teddy!
2199
01:15:10.902 --> 01:15:12.368
JAYLEN:
You deserved that.
2200
01:15:12.370 --> 01:15:14.571
LISA:
<i>A school?</i>
2201
01:15:14.573 --> 01:15:17.574
We've never taken on
a project like that.
2202
01:15:17.576 --> 01:15:20.510
STEWART: Well, I am
an outside-of-the-box thinker.
2203
01:15:20.512 --> 01:15:22.278
That's just who I am.
2204
01:15:22.280 --> 01:15:23.646
I think that if students
are excited
2205
01:15:23.648 --> 01:15:25.148
about their environment,
2206
01:15:25.150 --> 01:15:27.083
they'll be excited
about learning.
2207
01:15:27.085 --> 01:15:28.284
That makes total sense.
2208
01:15:28.286 --> 01:15:29.653
I know I would.
2209
01:15:29.655 --> 01:15:31.120
Well, I'm glad to hear it.
2210
01:15:31.122 --> 01:15:32.455
If you're interested,
I'd love to give you
2211
01:15:32.457 --> 01:15:33.956
a tour of the school.
2212
01:15:33.958 --> 01:15:35.558
You could come by any day,
or you know what,
2213
01:15:35.560 --> 01:15:37.125
you could even come
after school.
2214
01:15:37.127 --> 01:15:40.098
We have several
night programs as well.
2215
01:15:41.900 --> 01:15:44.334
- Hey.
- Hey.
2216
01:15:44.336 --> 01:15:46.402
CARRIE (IN DISTANCE):
Okay, show me what you got.
2217
01:15:46.404 --> 01:15:48.003
Show me what you got!
2218
01:15:48.005 --> 01:15:50.206
What you got for me?
Come on.
2219
01:15:50.208 --> 01:15:52.141
Light up. What you got?
2220
01:15:52.143 --> 01:15:54.043
Oh, you killing me!
2221
01:15:54.045 --> 01:15:55.578
You won. Congratulations.
2222
01:15:55.580 --> 01:15:57.547
I'm proud of you, boo.
2223
01:15:57.549 --> 01:15:59.515
Now, it's not cool
that you beat your teacher
2224
01:15:59.517 --> 01:16:01.517
at Texas hold 'em,
but I like the way
2225
01:16:01.519 --> 01:16:04.020
you nailed down the
calculations on the pot odds,
2226
01:16:04.022 --> 01:16:06.255
so I'm gonna let this slide.
2227
01:16:06.257 --> 01:16:08.291
Now, remember what I said.
2228
01:16:08.293 --> 01:16:11.093
There are no shortcuts.
You gotta work your butt off.
2229
01:16:11.095 --> 01:16:13.128
Okay? Give me some love.
2230
01:16:13.130 --> 01:16:15.465
Mmm. So proud of you.
2231
01:16:15.467 --> 01:16:17.200
Go on and have a good day, now.
2232
01:16:17.202 --> 01:16:19.237
Maybe one day,
I'll take you to Vegas.
2233
01:16:21.706 --> 01:16:23.508
(SIGHS)
2234
01:16:26.311 --> 01:16:27.512
That was cool.
2235
01:16:29.347 --> 01:16:32.047
You know, uh, this used to be
the special ed classroom
2236
01:16:32.049 --> 01:16:33.316
when I went here.
2237
01:16:33.318 --> 01:16:34.950
It still is.
2238
01:16:34.952 --> 01:16:36.686
You teach special ed?
2239
01:16:36.688 --> 01:16:40.390
Special ed is one
of my sections.
2240
01:16:40.392 --> 01:16:42.926
It's one of my favorites,
actually.
2241
01:16:44.729 --> 01:16:48.296
You know, that kid reminds me
a lot of myself.
2242
01:16:48.298 --> 01:16:49.699
(CHUCKLES)
I couldn't do math for shit
2243
01:16:49.701 --> 01:16:51.401
when I was in school.
2244
01:16:51.403 --> 01:16:53.436
Difference is I didn't have
a teacher like you
2245
01:16:53.438 --> 01:16:55.671
that was willing
to stay behind and help me.
2246
01:16:55.673 --> 01:16:57.473
I know what you're doing,
Teddy.
2247
01:16:57.475 --> 01:17:01.009
And I admit it was
very cool of you
2248
01:17:01.011 --> 01:17:03.379
to take the fall
for your classmates,
2249
01:17:03.381 --> 01:17:04.580
but you're a hustler.
2250
01:17:04.582 --> 01:17:07.350
Trying to skate by
without doing the work.
2251
01:17:07.352 --> 01:17:09.151
You should know
you can't hustle me.
2252
01:17:09.153 --> 01:17:10.152
I do.
2253
01:17:10.154 --> 01:17:12.688
Okay? I-I do know that.
2254
01:17:12.690 --> 01:17:14.991
And I promise you I'm done.
2255
01:17:14.993 --> 01:17:16.526
I'm not hustling no more.
2256
01:17:16.528 --> 01:17:19.529
Night school is about
second chances.
2257
01:17:19.531 --> 01:17:21.329
And if I don't get
this second chance,
2258
01:17:21.331 --> 01:17:22.698
then it's over for me.
2259
01:17:22.700 --> 01:17:25.233
Night school
is all that I have.
2260
01:17:25.235 --> 01:17:27.370
(SIGHS)
2261
01:17:27.372 --> 01:17:29.238
Please.
2262
01:17:29.240 --> 01:17:31.707
I'll consider it
on one condition.
2263
01:17:31.709 --> 01:17:33.375
Whatever it is.
2264
01:17:33.377 --> 01:17:35.243
We get you tested.
2265
01:17:35.245 --> 01:17:37.581
For STDs? That's not an issue.
2266
01:17:39.083 --> 01:17:40.283
I don't mind that. I mean...
2267
01:17:40.285 --> 01:17:41.317
(SIGHS) Goddamn it.
2268
01:17:41.319 --> 01:17:43.051
There was one time where, uh,
2269
01:17:43.053 --> 01:17:44.754
the condom popped 'cause I put
my balls inside of...
2270
01:17:44.756 --> 01:17:47.589
No, you idiot.
2271
01:17:47.591 --> 01:17:49.393
For learning disabilities.
2272
01:17:51.262 --> 01:17:54.397
Nobody cares about your
escapades with your bitches.
2273
01:17:54.399 --> 01:17:56.599
TEDDY:
<i>So, what are the test results,</i>
2274
01:17:56.601 --> 01:17:57.599
Carrie?
2275
01:17:57.601 --> 01:18:00.237
Teddy, the issue is...
2276
01:18:01.538 --> 01:18:03.475
...you're clinically dumb.
2277
01:18:06.778 --> 01:18:08.510
I knew it.
2278
01:18:08.512 --> 01:18:11.112
I knew it was a mistake.
I knew it was a mistake.
2279
01:18:11.114 --> 01:18:13.548
(LAUGHS) Boy, I'm sorry.
I'm just messing with you.
2280
01:18:13.550 --> 01:18:15.183
- Come on, Carrie.
- Look, look.
2281
01:18:15.185 --> 01:18:16.419
My suspicions were right,
2282
01:18:16.421 --> 01:18:19.421
and you, my friend,
are dyslexic.
2283
01:18:19.423 --> 01:18:21.323
Okay.
2284
01:18:21.325 --> 01:18:23.325
Okay, so that just means
I'm having problems
2285
01:18:23.327 --> 01:18:25.059
with my reading
and my writing, right?
2286
01:18:25.061 --> 01:18:27.730
Yep, but you also have
dyscalculia.
2287
01:18:27.732 --> 01:18:29.665
Discalcu... I don't even know
how to pronounce that.
2288
01:18:29.667 --> 01:18:33.003
Basically, it's like dyslexia
but with math.
2289
01:18:35.105 --> 01:18:36.538
That's what I got.
2290
01:18:36.540 --> 01:18:38.073
I knew it.
2291
01:18:38.075 --> 01:18:39.742
Now that you say it,
it makes sense.
2292
01:18:39.744 --> 01:18:41.142
If you take me to a restaurant
2293
01:18:41.144 --> 01:18:42.377
and you say,
"Teddy, leave the tip,"
2294
01:18:42.379 --> 01:18:43.445
I'm-I'm all over the place.
2295
01:18:43.447 --> 01:18:44.613
That's exactly what it is.
2296
01:18:44.615 --> 01:18:46.448
- We did it.
- Oh, we're not done.
2297
01:18:46.450 --> 01:18:48.783
You also have
a processing disorder.
2298
01:18:48.785 --> 01:18:51.186
I got a touch
of prostate cancer?
2299
01:18:51.188 --> 01:18:53.255
She didn't touch my ass
one time.
2300
01:18:53.257 --> 01:18:55.257
I said "processing disorder."
2301
01:18:55.259 --> 01:18:57.526
Carrie, if you're not
going to help me,
2302
01:18:57.528 --> 01:18:58.827
then we're wasting our time.
2303
01:18:58.829 --> 01:19:01.363
Explain to me
what this stuff is.
2304
01:19:01.365 --> 01:19:02.598
If I got a proc...
2305
01:19:02.600 --> 01:19:03.701
Oh, my God.
2306
01:19:05.302 --> 01:19:07.271
I'm not processing it.
2307
01:19:08.739 --> 01:19:11.138
I didn't process
none of that shit.
2308
01:19:11.140 --> 01:19:14.376
You are just one big,
beautiful mixed drink
2309
01:19:14.378 --> 01:19:15.778
of learning disabilities.
2310
01:19:15.780 --> 01:19:17.412
So I'm not dumb?
2311
01:19:17.414 --> 01:19:19.447
Boy, I was just playing
when I said that earlier.
2312
01:19:19.449 --> 01:19:22.350
No good teacher would ever
call their students dumb.
2313
01:19:22.352 --> 01:19:23.852
Okay.
2314
01:19:23.854 --> 01:19:25.820
So, how do we fix it?
Let's talk solution.
2315
01:19:25.822 --> 01:19:27.522
Well, there's no cure
for what you have.
2316
01:19:27.524 --> 01:19:29.824
Oh, my God.
2317
01:19:29.826 --> 01:19:32.160
I got learning herpes?
2318
01:19:32.162 --> 01:19:33.562
Boy...
2319
01:19:33.564 --> 01:19:34.829
Oh, shit.
2320
01:19:34.831 --> 01:19:37.197
There is no such thing
as learning herpes.
2321
01:19:37.199 --> 01:19:39.267
I'm blistering up.
2322
01:19:39.269 --> 01:19:41.436
It's 'cause I'm trying
to think.
2323
01:19:41.438 --> 01:19:43.605
- Hey, Teddy!
- Hey, Mac.
2324
01:19:43.607 --> 01:19:45.607
- Ringleader.
- Hi, guys.
2325
01:19:45.609 --> 01:19:48.375
- Teddy!
- Yeah, Teddy! Teddy!
2326
01:19:48.377 --> 01:19:50.211
Teaching the conventional way
2327
01:19:50.213 --> 01:19:53.148
just isn't gonna
get it done for Teddy,
2328
01:19:53.150 --> 01:19:54.416
so we're gonna mix it up.
2329
01:19:54.418 --> 01:19:56.418
You out here getting it in.
2330
01:19:56.420 --> 01:19:58.653
What's going on, Carrie?
Why you in here?
2331
01:19:58.655 --> 01:20:00.655
Why you in the ring?
What's going on?
2332
01:20:00.657 --> 01:20:03.458
Teddy, your difficulties
are focus-related.
2333
01:20:03.460 --> 01:20:04.359
Uh-huh.
2334
01:20:04.361 --> 01:20:06.328
My goal is to remove
that mind chatter
2335
01:20:06.330 --> 01:20:09.497
so you can achieve properly
unencumbered neural pathways.
2336
01:20:09.499 --> 01:20:10.865
And this isn't a ring.
2337
01:20:10.867 --> 01:20:12.333
It's a hexagon.
2338
01:20:12.335 --> 01:20:14.269
Huh. Oh, it is.
2339
01:20:14.271 --> 01:20:15.403
Yeah, well...
2340
01:20:15.405 --> 01:20:16.871
Why you taking your shoes off?
2341
01:20:16.873 --> 01:20:18.607
Is this somebody's carpet?
2342
01:20:18.609 --> 01:20:20.408
Teddy, what's
the square root of 81?
2343
01:20:20.410 --> 01:20:21.576
What?
2344
01:20:21.578 --> 01:20:24.545
- (GRUNTS)
- Ow! Ow!
2345
01:20:24.547 --> 01:20:27.215
- Shit!
- What's the square root of 81?
2346
01:20:27.217 --> 01:20:29.284
I don't know.
(GROANS) What you do...?
2347
01:20:29.286 --> 01:20:31.353
- Ow! Carrie!
- What's the square root of 81?
2348
01:20:31.355 --> 01:20:32.353
You breaking my arm!
2349
01:20:32.355 --> 01:20:33.888
Come on, we're clearing
those neural pathways.
2350
01:20:33.890 --> 01:20:35.656
- No! (SCREAMS)
- Stop. Hey!
2351
01:20:35.658 --> 01:20:37.424
- What you doing?
- Focus!
2352
01:20:37.426 --> 01:20:40.362
- (SCREAMS)
- Square root! Focus!
2353
01:20:40.364 --> 01:20:41.663
I don't know!
2354
01:20:41.665 --> 01:20:44.331
- Oh, God! (SCREAMS)
- (BONES CRACKING)
2355
01:20:44.333 --> 01:20:47.234
Concentrate.
Teddy, concentrate.
2356
01:20:47.236 --> 01:20:48.569
Come on, Teddy, come on.
2357
01:20:48.571 --> 01:20:50.205
♪ Na na na-na na na
2358
01:20:50.207 --> 01:20:52.807
♪ Na na-na na na na-na
na na-na... ♪
2359
01:20:52.809 --> 01:20:54.776
How you feeling today, Teddy?
2360
01:20:54.778 --> 01:20:58.278
I'm-I'm feeling fine,
Carrie, but I ain't feeling
2361
01:20:58.280 --> 01:21:00.347
this Mr. Miyagi shit, okay?
2362
01:21:00.349 --> 01:21:01.916
What's the capital of Belgium?
2363
01:21:01.918 --> 01:21:03.685
Uh...
2364
01:21:03.687 --> 01:21:04.719
waffles.
2365
01:21:04.721 --> 01:21:06.320
- What? (STOMPS FOOT)
- Run!
2366
01:21:06.322 --> 01:21:07.656
- (GASPING, SCREAMING)
- Don't you run from me.
2367
01:21:07.658 --> 01:21:09.590
- Don't you run from me.
- Don't. He's so little.
2368
01:21:09.592 --> 01:21:12.459
- What is the capital of Belgium?
- (GROANING)
2369
01:21:12.461 --> 01:21:14.496
I haven't eaten breakfast!
I don't know!
2370
01:21:14.498 --> 01:21:16.931
- That is not the answer!
- (SCREAMS, GROANS)
2371
01:21:16.933 --> 01:21:18.298
Pretend you're dead.
2372
01:21:18.300 --> 01:21:20.701
- Oh! Oh! (SCREAMS)
- Get back here!
2373
01:21:20.703 --> 01:21:22.636
Teddy, focus.
2374
01:21:22.638 --> 01:21:24.872
- Concentrate.
- Let's do it.
2375
01:21:24.874 --> 01:21:27.409
♪ Ooh, tell you all my deepest,
darkest secrets... ♪
2376
01:21:27.411 --> 01:21:29.911
Water is comprised of...?
2377
01:21:29.913 --> 01:21:31.512
Let's go, Teddy.
You got this, Teddy.
2378
01:21:31.514 --> 01:21:33.547
- Rain.
- "Rain."
2379
01:21:33.549 --> 01:21:35.349
TEDDY:
Wait, no. Wait, wait. (GRUNTS)
2380
01:21:35.351 --> 01:21:37.484
I know it, I know it. Um...
2381
01:21:37.486 --> 01:21:38.953
- Think.
- (STAMMERING)
2382
01:21:38.955 --> 01:21:40.889
- Focus!
- Um... helium.
2383
01:21:40.891 --> 01:21:42.423
No. No, no, no.
2384
01:21:42.425 --> 01:21:44.591
Nitrogen. It's nitrogen, right?
2385
01:21:44.593 --> 01:21:46.493
- You better get it right.
- It's a gas.
2386
01:21:46.495 --> 01:21:48.595
- What?
- It's a gas! (GRUNTS)
2387
01:21:48.597 --> 01:21:50.667
(SCREAMING)
2388
01:21:52.803 --> 01:21:54.268
Jesus Christ!
2389
01:21:54.270 --> 01:21:55.269
Give me the answer!
2390
01:21:55.271 --> 01:21:56.570
- Say it!
- (SCREAMING)
2391
01:21:56.572 --> 01:21:57.571
Give me the damn answer.
2392
01:21:57.573 --> 01:21:58.839
Tell me!
2393
01:21:58.841 --> 01:22:00.040
It's two part hydrogen,
2394
01:22:00.042 --> 01:22:01.976
one part... one...
2395
01:22:01.978 --> 01:22:03.310
one part oxygen.
2396
01:22:03.312 --> 01:22:05.446
- Yes!
- Say that again.
2397
01:22:05.448 --> 01:22:06.647
He said it.
Don't make him say it again.
2398
01:22:06.649 --> 01:22:07.881
I said two part hydrogen,
2399
01:22:07.883 --> 01:22:09.983
one part oxygen.
2400
01:22:09.985 --> 01:22:10.984
(LAUGHING)
2401
01:22:10.986 --> 01:22:12.019
Teddy, that's right.
2402
01:22:12.021 --> 01:22:13.487
- You got it right.
- What?
2403
01:22:13.489 --> 01:22:14.689
That's the correct answer.
2404
01:22:14.691 --> 01:22:16.590
(GASPS) I got it right.
2405
01:22:16.592 --> 01:22:17.792
You got it right, Teddy.
2406
01:22:17.794 --> 01:22:19.560
(CHUCKLING):
Yeah. Yes.
2407
01:22:19.562 --> 01:22:20.828
Yes!
2408
01:22:20.830 --> 01:22:22.730
What a big day for all of us.
2409
01:22:22.732 --> 01:22:23.931
I can't believe
that I actually...
2410
01:22:23.933 --> 01:22:25.800
(GRUNTS) What?
2411
01:22:25.802 --> 01:22:27.035
(SNIFFS)
2412
01:22:27.037 --> 01:22:28.970
What is that smell?
What is that?
2413
01:22:28.972 --> 01:22:31.905
Oh, now, that's a gas.
2414
01:22:31.907 --> 01:22:34.308
You bust ass
in my face, Car...?
2415
01:22:34.310 --> 01:22:35.809
Methane.
2416
01:22:35.811 --> 01:22:37.044
It's in my mouth.
2417
01:22:37.046 --> 01:22:39.047
You got my lips
all chapped and shit.
2418
01:22:39.049 --> 01:22:40.614
This ain't no type
of education.
2419
01:22:40.616 --> 01:22:42.316
This is chemical warfare.
2420
01:22:42.318 --> 01:22:44.485
(SNORING)
2421
01:22:44.487 --> 01:22:46.653
LUIS:
AirDrop it to you.
2422
01:22:46.655 --> 01:22:49.924
- TEDDY: Yeah.
- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
2423
01:22:49.926 --> 01:22:51.893
(SNIFFLING)
2424
01:22:51.895 --> 01:22:53.927
- (SOBBING)
- Theresa, what's wrong?
2425
01:22:53.929 --> 01:22:55.496
Oh...
2426
01:22:55.498 --> 01:22:57.064
I just...
this all went so fast.
2427
01:22:57.066 --> 01:22:58.766
I don't want school to end.
2428
01:22:58.768 --> 01:23:00.067
(CHUCKLING):
Okay.
2429
01:23:00.069 --> 01:23:02.436
Well, you can come
to college with me.
2430
01:23:02.438 --> 01:23:04.705
- What? You're going?
- Mm-hmm.
2431
01:23:04.707 --> 01:23:06.707
- I'm so happy for you.
- (CHUCKLING)
2432
01:23:06.709 --> 01:23:08.408
When did you decide?
2433
01:23:08.410 --> 01:23:09.610
Well, don't take this
the wrong way,
2434
01:23:09.612 --> 01:23:12.378
but hanging out with you guys
scared the shit out of me.
2435
01:23:12.380 --> 01:23:14.548
So I think I'm gonna...
I think I'm gonna
2436
01:23:14.550 --> 01:23:15.649
do something with my life.
2437
01:23:15.651 --> 01:23:17.118
That's wonderful.
2438
01:23:17.120 --> 01:23:19.887
I can just see you now
in the cutest outfit...
2439
01:23:19.889 --> 01:23:21.889
little miniskirt...
walking through the quad.
2440
01:23:21.891 --> 01:23:23.757
You're clutching
onto your philosophy thesis.
2441
01:23:23.759 --> 01:23:26.393
But when you get to class,
the professor is blown away
2442
01:23:26.395 --> 01:23:27.694
- by how brilliant it is.
- Yeah.
2443
01:23:27.696 --> 01:23:29.429
So he grabs onto you,
and you can
2444
01:23:29.431 --> 01:23:30.731
feel him up against your thigh.
2445
01:23:30.733 --> 01:23:32.432
- Uh...
- Not in a sexual way,
2446
01:23:32.434 --> 01:23:34.367
but not not in a sexual way,
you know?
2447
01:23:34.369 --> 01:23:36.702
And he looks strangely
like Bruno Mars.
2448
01:23:36.704 --> 01:23:37.939
Even though
he's super academic,
2449
01:23:37.941 --> 01:23:39.540
he wears, like,
pink blazers sometimes.
2450
01:23:39.542 --> 01:23:42.042
Well, you can still go
to college and do...
2451
01:23:42.044 --> 01:23:43.646
that other stuff.
2452
01:23:44.747 --> 01:23:46.013
Me? College?
2453
01:23:46.015 --> 01:23:47.613
Oh, no.
Randy wouldn't let me.
2454
01:23:47.615 --> 01:23:50.484
Screw Randy. You can do
whatever you want to do.
2455
01:23:50.486 --> 01:23:51.418
You don't know Randy.
2456
01:23:51.420 --> 01:23:53.153
Why can't you just be like,
"Hey, Randy.
2457
01:23:53.155 --> 01:23:55.556
I want to do this.
Deal with it."
2458
01:23:55.558 --> 01:23:57.057
CARRIE (FROM HALL):
Okay!
2459
01:23:57.059 --> 01:23:59.458
Night school people.
2460
01:23:59.460 --> 01:24:02.996
Last class,
final demonstration.
2461
01:24:02.998 --> 01:24:04.765
Carrie, please,
no more learning.
2462
01:24:04.767 --> 01:24:05.966
My brain is at capacity.
2463
01:24:05.968 --> 01:24:07.634
I want to be
a dental hy-enist,
2464
01:24:07.636 --> 01:24:09.502
not Elon Musk
or Stephen Hawking.
2465
01:24:09.504 --> 01:24:10.703
(CHUCKLES)
Well, okay, Luis.
2466
01:24:10.705 --> 01:24:11.939
I'm right there with you.
2467
01:24:11.941 --> 01:24:12.972
Ha!
2468
01:24:12.974 --> 01:24:14.508
- Oh, no.
- (CARRIE LAUGHING)
2469
01:24:14.510 --> 01:24:16.410
Is this another
science experiment?
2470
01:24:16.412 --> 01:24:19.646
Oh, no, this is
a celebration, Big Mac.
2471
01:24:19.648 --> 01:24:21.547
- (WHOOPING)
- Oh, yeah. You guys been
2472
01:24:21.549 --> 01:24:23.150
- working your asses off.
- (ALL EXCLAIMING)
2473
01:24:23.152 --> 01:24:25.152
- (LAUGHTER)
- Hey! - Shit!
2474
01:24:25.154 --> 01:24:26.920
Oh, I'm so sorry, Bobby.
2475
01:24:26.922 --> 01:24:28.689
No, that's cool.
I'm gonna make me
2476
01:24:28.691 --> 01:24:30.657
some toilet punch
after lockdown, baby.
2477
01:24:30.659 --> 01:24:32.692
- (MUFFLED DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)
- Y'all-y'all hear that music?
2478
01:24:32.694 --> 01:24:33.927
- Yeah.
- Oh, yeah.
2479
01:24:33.929 --> 01:24:36.129
Oh, you know what,
it's prom night.
2480
01:24:36.131 --> 01:24:37.197
You guys go to prom?
2481
01:24:37.199 --> 01:24:39.166
- No, I was in juvie.
- Really?
2482
01:24:39.168 --> 01:24:40.667
I was home with an infant.
2483
01:24:40.669 --> 01:24:42.535
This is a sign, guys.
2484
01:24:42.537 --> 01:24:44.637
- What?
- Yeah, we've been working hard.
2485
01:24:44.639 --> 01:24:45.973
We should let some steam off.
2486
01:24:45.975 --> 01:24:47.807
Why don't we go to the prom?
2487
01:24:47.809 --> 01:24:49.610
You know what? Class dismissed.
2488
01:24:49.612 --> 01:24:50.944
Let's go shake that ass.
2489
01:24:50.946 --> 01:24:52.813
(ALL CHEERING)
2490
01:24:52.815 --> 01:24:55.481
Let's go to prom, baby!
Let's go to prom!
2491
01:24:55.483 --> 01:24:56.849
(LAUGHTER, INDISTINCT CHATTER)
2492
01:24:56.851 --> 01:24:58.618
Oh, my God!
2493
01:24:58.620 --> 01:25:00.519
♪ Just a slave to the game,
I'm like a bird... ♪
2494
01:25:00.521 --> 01:25:01.555
What the hell, Theresa?
2495
01:25:01.557 --> 01:25:02.990
I've been outside honking
2496
01:25:02.992 --> 01:25:04.658
for like 15 minutes.
2497
01:25:04.660 --> 01:25:08.161
♪ I feel like I can break
through the ceiling ♪
2498
01:25:08.163 --> 01:25:11.664
♪ So I find myself a place
without missing a beat ♪
2499
01:25:11.666 --> 01:25:13.165
♪ Where they buy me a drink
2500
01:25:13.167 --> 01:25:15.534
♪ A place where I can dance
like I'm free ♪
2501
01:25:15.536 --> 01:25:17.070
Don't talk to me like that.
2502
01:25:17.072 --> 01:25:18.238
♪ I'll dance until
these chains fall... ♪
2503
01:25:18.240 --> 01:25:19.939
I'm your wife.
I'm not your mommy,
2504
01:25:19.941 --> 01:25:21.707
and I'm not your house cleaner.
2505
01:25:21.709 --> 01:25:24.243
And when I get my GED,
I'm gonna pursue my dreams,
2506
01:25:24.245 --> 01:25:26.479
and I'm gonna need
your support.
2507
01:25:26.481 --> 01:25:29.182
And also, I want to have sex
on a regular basis.
2508
01:25:29.184 --> 01:25:30.650
- Oh. - Mmm!
- (RANDY CHUCKLES)
2509
01:25:30.652 --> 01:25:31.951
I mean, like, kinky sex.
2510
01:25:31.953 --> 01:25:33.220
Like, not make-a-baby sex,
2511
01:25:33.222 --> 01:25:34.787
but 45-minute sex.
2512
01:25:34.789 --> 01:25:36.155
Like, <i>Fifty Shades of Grey</i> sex.
2513
01:25:36.157 --> 01:25:37.256
Hmm?
2514
01:25:37.258 --> 01:25:39.760
THERESA: I want you
to crack my butt like a walnut.
2515
01:25:39.762 --> 01:25:40.961
Do I make myself clear?!
2516
01:25:40.963 --> 01:25:42.728
Okay, okay.
2517
01:25:42.730 --> 01:25:44.231
I'm so sorry, babe.
2518
01:25:44.233 --> 01:25:46.565
I think you're
a freakin' rock star.
2519
01:25:46.567 --> 01:25:48.668
And judging by what
you just said to me,
2520
01:25:48.670 --> 01:25:50.636
I can't wait to be
your porn star.
2521
01:25:50.638 --> 01:25:51.939
Whoa.
2522
01:25:51.941 --> 01:25:53.839
(CHUCKLES QUIETLY)
2523
01:25:53.841 --> 01:25:55.107
- (DANCE MUSIC BLARING)
- CARRIE: All right, y'all,
2524
01:25:55.109 --> 01:25:56.611
we got the party
up in here tonight!
2525
01:25:58.012 --> 01:25:59.845
That's a clean batch.
2526
01:25:59.847 --> 01:26:02.115
I want this punch
to stay that way.
2527
01:26:02.117 --> 01:26:04.884
Gonna be checking
throughout the night.
2528
01:26:04.886 --> 01:26:06.619
No, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no.
2529
01:26:06.621 --> 01:26:09.121
Excuse me. This dance
is for students only.
2530
01:26:09.123 --> 01:26:10.923
Well, this is
my night school class,
2531
01:26:10.925 --> 01:26:12.624
and they are students here.
2532
01:26:12.626 --> 01:26:13.894
Okay, well, technically,
technically, you're still
2533
01:26:13.896 --> 01:26:15.095
on school hours,
so, Miss Carter,
2534
01:26:15.097 --> 01:26:16.296
please return
to your classroom.
2535
01:26:16.298 --> 01:26:18.097
Well, we gonna spend
our class hours
2536
01:26:18.099 --> 01:26:19.999
- in the gym, at the party.
- Carrie.
2537
01:26:20.001 --> 01:26:21.734
So get out of the way,
bitch. Move!
2538
01:26:21.736 --> 01:26:23.635
- I can't allow this.
- She got you. She got you.
2539
01:26:23.637 --> 01:26:25.071
Man, why you always
about that rah-rah, man?
2540
01:26:25.073 --> 01:26:26.706
I'll allow this.
I'll allow this to happen.
2541
01:26:26.708 --> 01:26:28.208
We just trying
to get a vibe, though.
2542
01:26:28.210 --> 01:26:29.608
(GIGGLES QUIETLY)
2543
01:26:29.610 --> 01:26:30.943
TEDDY:
All right, Piedmont High,
2544
01:26:30.945 --> 01:26:32.712
make room for
the night school crew!
2545
01:26:32.714 --> 01:26:34.080
♪ One, two, three, uh!
2546
01:26:34.082 --> 01:26:36.015
♪ My baby
don't mess around... ♪
2547
01:26:36.017 --> 01:26:37.883
Watch out, watch out,
watch out!
2548
01:26:37.885 --> 01:26:40.019
♪ And this I know for sure
2549
01:26:40.021 --> 01:26:41.053
Everybody, come on!
2550
01:26:41.055 --> 01:26:42.888
♪ Uh!
2551
01:26:42.890 --> 01:26:46.092
♪ Thank God for Mom and Dad
for sticking to together... ♪
2552
01:26:46.094 --> 01:26:47.728
JAYLEN:
Oh, Miss C gonna kill 'em!
2553
01:26:49.597 --> 01:26:50.730
♪ Yeah! Huh!
2554
01:26:50.732 --> 01:26:52.932
♪ Hey ya
2555
01:26:52.934 --> 01:26:53.968
Yeah!
2556
01:26:55.737 --> 01:26:58.871
♪ Hey ya
2557
01:26:58.873 --> 01:27:00.707
- ♪ Hey ya
- Pelvic, pelvic, pelvic.
2558
01:27:03.278 --> 01:27:06.846
- ♪ Hey ya
- (WHOOPING)
2559
01:27:06.848 --> 01:27:08.814
♪ Here we go, uh, shake it,
shake-shake it ♪
2560
01:27:08.816 --> 01:27:10.316
- ♪ Shake it, shake-shake it
- ♪ Oh, oh
2561
01:27:10.318 --> 01:27:11.384
♪ Shake it, shake-shake it
2562
01:27:11.386 --> 01:27:14.887
♪ Shake it, shake it,
shake it, shake it like ♪
2563
01:27:14.889 --> 01:27:16.589
- ♪ A Polaroid picture
- ♪ You know what to do
2564
01:27:16.591 --> 01:27:17.857
♪ Shake it,
shake it, shake it ♪
2565
01:27:17.859 --> 01:27:20.026
- ♪ You know what to do
- (YELLS)
2566
01:27:20.028 --> 01:27:22.328
♪ Shake it, shake it,
sh-sh-shake it ♪
2567
01:27:22.330 --> 01:27:24.230
♪ You know what to do
2568
01:27:24.232 --> 01:27:25.865
♪ Hey ya
2569
01:27:25.867 --> 01:27:28.667
♪ Oh, oh
2570
01:27:28.669 --> 01:27:30.069
- ♪ Hey ya
- Go, Theresa!
2571
01:27:30.071 --> 01:27:31.771
- (CHEERING)
- ♪ Oh, oh
2572
01:27:31.773 --> 01:27:34.073
♪ Hey ya
2573
01:27:34.075 --> 01:27:36.342
- ♪ Oh, oh ♪
- She's twerking! She's twerking!
2574
01:27:36.344 --> 01:27:38.778
- ♪ Hey ya
- She's twerking!
2575
01:27:38.780 --> 01:27:40.646
- Go, T!
- Crack my walnut!
2576
01:27:40.648 --> 01:27:42.647
- (WHOOPING)
- That's not for kids, Theresa!
2577
01:27:42.649 --> 01:27:44.383
- ♪ Oh, oh
- Go, T!
2578
01:27:44.385 --> 01:27:46.918
- ♪ Hey ya...
- (SONG FADES)
2579
01:27:46.920 --> 01:27:49.722
(SLOW BALLAD PLAYING)
2580
01:27:49.724 --> 01:27:52.758
♪ Ooh, ooh
2581
01:27:52.760 --> 01:27:56.962
♪ Oh, oh
2582
01:27:56.964 --> 01:27:59.931
♪ Hey, hey
2583
01:27:59.933 --> 01:28:03.002
♪ The dream is all
that keeps me alive ♪
2584
01:28:03.004 --> 01:28:05.805
(SINGS LINE IN SPANISH)
2585
01:28:05.807 --> 01:28:07.373
♪ No matter what it takes
2586
01:28:07.375 --> 01:28:10.276
♪ You know I'm always
gonna keep on fighting ♪
2587
01:28:10.278 --> 01:28:11.845
♪ I'm fighting
2588
01:28:13.748 --> 01:28:16.182
♪ I'm never gonna
let the dream go ♪
2589
01:28:16.184 --> 01:28:19.285
♪ I'll take this all the way
2590
01:28:19.287 --> 01:28:23.322
♪ Nobody's ever,
ever gonna stop el sueño ♪
2591
01:28:23.324 --> 01:28:25.658
<i>♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪</i>
2592
01:28:25.660 --> 01:28:29.028
♪ No desert, no snake
gonna take me down ♪
2593
01:28:29.030 --> 01:28:31.896
- ♪ Take me down
- <i>♪ Take me down, no way... ♪</i>
2594
01:28:31.898 --> 01:28:34.400
Wait, s-sweetheart,
who-who's watching the kids?
2595
01:28:34.402 --> 01:28:36.301
I got it covered.
2596
01:28:36.303 --> 01:28:39.105
She said, "I want to be
a flight attendant."
2597
01:28:39.107 --> 01:28:41.006
You see?
2598
01:28:41.008 --> 01:28:43.975
"I want to go
from place to place.
2599
01:28:43.977 --> 01:28:46.345
It'd be like going..."
2600
01:28:46.347 --> 01:28:48.615
Is y'all little bitches
listening?
2601
01:28:50.017 --> 01:28:53.185
You know, Carrie,
you are incredible.
2602
01:28:53.187 --> 01:28:54.953
I'm serious.
2603
01:28:54.955 --> 01:28:55.854
There's never been a teacher
2604
01:28:55.856 --> 01:28:57.889
that believe in me
the way that you do.
2605
01:28:57.891 --> 01:28:59.724
Teddy, what can I say?
2606
01:28:59.726 --> 01:29:03.129
You've grown so much
in such a short period of time.
2607
01:29:03.131 --> 01:29:05.030
And if you keep up
with all the stuff
2608
01:29:05.032 --> 01:29:08.166
that we've been doing,
you are well on your way.
2609
01:29:08.168 --> 01:29:10.034
I'm just...
2610
01:29:10.036 --> 01:29:12.370
I'm really,
really proud of you.
2611
01:29:12.372 --> 01:29:15.143
(LUIS SINGING IN SPANISH)
2612
01:29:19.146 --> 01:29:21.946
You know, Carrie, uh...
2613
01:29:21.948 --> 01:29:25.250
these past few weeks
have been amazing.
2614
01:29:25.252 --> 01:29:27.852
I mean, our chemistry,
it goes without saying,
2615
01:29:27.854 --> 01:29:28.920
it's strong.
2616
01:29:28.922 --> 01:29:30.855
I sense it. I know you do, too.
2617
01:29:30.857 --> 01:29:32.123
But as magical as these moments
2618
01:29:32.125 --> 01:29:33.224
that we've been having
may be...
2619
01:29:33.226 --> 01:29:35.126
Fool, I'm gay.
2620
01:29:35.128 --> 01:29:36.727
I'm not trying to play.
2621
01:29:36.729 --> 01:29:38.063
Now, I'm not saying
I ain't no freak,
2622
01:29:38.065 --> 01:29:39.265
'cause I'd drop it off on you.
2623
01:29:39.267 --> 01:29:40.499
I'm a lesbian.
2624
01:29:40.501 --> 01:29:43.768
If you want to pursue acting,
you can.
2625
01:29:43.770 --> 01:29:45.103
No, I'm gay.
2626
01:29:45.105 --> 01:29:46.771
Say that again. It sound like
you said you're gay.
2627
01:29:46.773 --> 01:29:48.239
I'm gay.
2628
01:29:48.241 --> 01:29:50.409
I like women.
2629
01:29:50.411 --> 01:29:51.943
Are you sure?
Because I'm getting
2630
01:29:51.945 --> 01:29:53.479
- a whole different vibe.
- MAYA: Oh, hell no!
2631
01:29:53.481 --> 01:29:55.715
- I'm pretty sure.
- Oh, God.
2632
01:29:57.117 --> 01:29:59.184
Teddy?
2633
01:29:59.186 --> 01:30:02.087
Is the, is the one on the left
your type?
2634
01:30:02.089 --> 01:30:03.821
Uh-uh, the one
in the tight dress is.
2635
01:30:03.823 --> 01:30:05.025
Shit, that's mine.
2636
01:30:06.092 --> 01:30:07.892
Hey.
2637
01:30:07.894 --> 01:30:09.894
There they go.
2638
01:30:09.896 --> 01:30:11.362
What are you doing here?
2639
01:30:11.364 --> 01:30:13.198
Huh?
2640
01:30:13.200 --> 01:30:15.166
What are you doing
at a high school prom?
2641
01:30:15.168 --> 01:30:17.835
What, uh... what-what
are you doing here, babe?
2642
01:30:17.837 --> 01:30:20.271
Why you... why you here?
2643
01:30:20.273 --> 01:30:21.372
Principal Patowsky
is interested in us
2644
01:30:21.374 --> 01:30:23.807
redesigning the school,
so he asked us to stop by...
2645
01:30:23.809 --> 01:30:25.010
Oh, he did, huh?
2646
01:30:26.447 --> 01:30:28.313
Well played, Stewart.
2647
01:30:28.315 --> 01:30:30.448
You two know each other?
2648
01:30:30.450 --> 01:30:32.383
Ask Stewart.
2649
01:30:32.385 --> 01:30:34.452
Uh, yes, we went
to high school together.
2650
01:30:34.454 --> 01:30:37.187
I think I mentioned that
at our first meeting.
2651
01:30:37.189 --> 01:30:39.926
No. No, you didn't.
2652
01:30:41.294 --> 01:30:43.294
Teddy, I am so confused.
2653
01:30:43.296 --> 01:30:45.963
Why are you here?
And who is she?
2654
01:30:45.965 --> 01:30:47.798
I can explain.
It ain't what it look like.
2655
01:30:47.800 --> 01:30:49.468
I'm in here
with a bunch of kids,
2656
01:30:49.470 --> 01:30:51.269
dressed in street clothes.
2657
01:30:51.271 --> 01:30:54.205
Then remember I blew out
the, uh, Barbecue Shack.
2658
01:30:54.207 --> 01:30:56.074
Fire took me out of that thing.
2659
01:30:56.076 --> 01:30:58.476
And now my windshield
was-was messed...
2660
01:30:58.478 --> 01:31:00.378
got me messed up about the car.
2661
01:31:00.380 --> 01:31:03.915
My brakes ain't working, 'cause
I backed into this, um...
2662
01:31:03.917 --> 01:31:06.184
She gay. She ain't even...
2663
01:31:06.186 --> 01:31:08.319
She ain't even
interested in me.
2664
01:31:08.321 --> 01:31:10.188
So... so...
2665
01:31:10.190 --> 01:31:11.389
Goddamn it.
2666
01:31:11.391 --> 01:31:12.457
Lisa.
2667
01:31:12.459 --> 01:31:13.559
- Not now. Not now.
- Wait.
2668
01:31:13.561 --> 01:31:14.828
Lisa.
2669
01:31:16.329 --> 01:31:17.829
Okay, Lisa.
2670
01:31:17.831 --> 01:31:19.197
Lisa, Lisa.
2671
01:31:19.199 --> 01:31:20.531
Lisa, can you listen, please?
2672
01:31:20.533 --> 01:31:22.533
Lisa, please just listen.
2673
01:31:22.535 --> 01:31:24.970
What?
What are you gonna say, Teddy?
2674
01:31:27.073 --> 01:31:29.073
I'm a high school dropout.
2675
01:31:29.075 --> 01:31:31.109
Okay? That woman in there,
2676
01:31:31.111 --> 01:31:33.877
Carrie...
that's my night school teacher.
2677
01:31:33.879 --> 01:31:35.446
That's what I've been doing
all these evenings.
2678
01:31:35.448 --> 01:31:37.282
I've been studying
to get my GED
2679
01:31:37.284 --> 01:31:39.185
so that I can get a job
at Marvin's.
2680
01:31:40.353 --> 01:31:41.986
So you don't work there now?
2681
01:31:41.988 --> 01:31:43.854
I don't...
2682
01:31:43.856 --> 01:31:45.490
I don't work there yet.
2683
01:31:45.492 --> 01:31:47.558
Right now I work
at a fast food restaurant
2684
01:31:47.560 --> 01:31:49.594
called Christian Chicken,
2685
01:31:49.596 --> 01:31:52.130
where the chicken is Christian
for some reason.
2686
01:31:52.132 --> 01:31:53.231
JAYLEN:
Oh, wait. L-Lisa,
2687
01:31:53.233 --> 01:31:54.365
Lisa, Lisa, let me just
2688
01:31:54.367 --> 01:31:55.500
say this before you judge him.
2689
01:31:55.502 --> 01:31:57.167
It ain't that average chicken.
2690
01:31:57.169 --> 01:31:58.935
It's not the same fast food
2691
01:31:58.937 --> 01:32:00.971
that you be getting from
these other little hood spots.
2692
01:32:00.973 --> 01:32:03.308
It's got the flavor... I don't
know if they use a needle,
2693
01:32:03.310 --> 01:32:05.078
- but they get the flavor...
- Jaylen, Jaylen, Jaylen!
2694
01:32:06.146 --> 01:32:07.345
How do you know my name?
2695
01:32:07.347 --> 01:32:09.514
My nigga be talking about you
in the class all the time.
2696
01:32:09.516 --> 01:32:12.249
He said you was bad.
I didn't know you was that bad.
2697
01:32:12.251 --> 01:32:14.052
We're Teddy's classmates.
I'm Theresa.
2698
01:32:14.054 --> 01:32:17.322
- That's Jaylen, Mila, Mackenzie, and Luis.
- Hey.
2699
01:32:17.324 --> 01:32:19.590
You remember me?
I-I was actually the waiter
2700
01:32:19.592 --> 01:32:22.593
at the restaurant when Teddy
pulled all of his pubes,
2701
01:32:22.595 --> 01:32:24.528
and then... and he put 'em
in the cheesecake
2702
01:32:24.530 --> 01:32:25.997
to get out of paying.
2703
01:32:25.999 --> 01:32:29.099
Now we're best friends.
2704
01:32:29.101 --> 01:32:30.468
(SCOFFS)
2705
01:32:30.470 --> 01:32:32.404
Thank you for your honesty.
2706
01:32:34.506 --> 01:32:35.539
Honesty.
2707
01:32:35.541 --> 01:32:38.309
I know...
2708
01:32:38.311 --> 01:32:40.645
that this is a lot to take in.
2709
01:32:40.647 --> 01:32:41.679
Really?
2710
01:32:41.681 --> 01:32:43.380
But if you let me explain...
2711
01:32:43.382 --> 01:32:45.148
- No.
- If you just... if you let me explain...
2712
01:32:45.150 --> 01:32:47.086
No, Teddy, I'm done
with your explanations.
2713
01:32:48.954 --> 01:32:50.457
You lied to me
about everything.
2714
01:32:51.957 --> 01:32:53.090
Why?
2715
01:32:53.092 --> 01:32:55.025
To impress me?
2716
01:32:55.027 --> 01:32:57.194
Teddy, I make my own money.
2717
01:32:57.196 --> 01:32:59.529
You think I care about
what kind of car you drive
2718
01:32:59.531 --> 01:33:01.699
or what kind of watch
you have on?
2719
01:33:01.701 --> 01:33:04.101
That's not me.
2720
01:33:04.103 --> 01:33:06.203
If you think that,
then you don't know me.
2721
01:33:06.205 --> 01:33:07.504
That's not true.
2722
01:33:07.506 --> 01:33:08.605
If you don't know me,
2723
01:33:08.607 --> 01:33:09.673
then you couldn't truly love me.
2724
01:33:09.675 --> 01:33:11.343
That's not true, Lisa.
2725
01:33:14.514 --> 01:33:16.281
Don't come back
to the apartment tonight.
2726
01:33:19.451 --> 01:33:22.454
Well, maybe you could stay
with your night school friend.
2727
01:33:25.492 --> 01:33:27.527
Maybe she'd have
some use for this.
2728
01:33:28.661 --> 01:33:31.263
It's probably fake, right?
2729
01:33:35.033 --> 01:33:36.031
MAYA:
Lisa.
2730
01:33:36.033 --> 01:33:37.100
- Lis...
- (DOOR OPENS)
2731
01:33:37.102 --> 01:33:38.170
Lisa!
2732
01:33:39.271 --> 01:33:40.607
(DOOR CLOSES)
2733
01:33:48.045 --> 01:33:49.980
GLADYS:
I cut the crust off,
2734
01:33:49.982 --> 01:33:52.082
just how you like it.
2735
01:33:52.084 --> 01:33:53.650
Thanks, Ma.
2736
01:33:53.652 --> 01:33:57.587
You're not seriously skipping
that GED test, are you?
2737
01:33:57.589 --> 01:33:59.121
Yeah.
2738
01:33:59.123 --> 01:34:01.659
I mean, I was doing
all that stuff for Lisa.
2739
01:34:01.661 --> 01:34:04.327
If she's not around,
then what's the point?
2740
01:34:04.329 --> 01:34:06.463
My poor baby, I feel terrible.
2741
01:34:06.465 --> 01:34:09.499
Oh, Gladys, now,
stop coddling this boy.
2742
01:34:09.501 --> 01:34:11.133
- (SIGHS)
- You know, Theodore,
2743
01:34:11.135 --> 01:34:12.769
you're a grown-ass man.
2744
01:34:12.771 --> 01:34:14.739
You need to get
your shit together.
2745
01:34:14.741 --> 01:34:16.139
I know, Dad.
2746
01:34:16.141 --> 01:34:18.375
I mean,
you say you got dyslexia,
2747
01:34:18.377 --> 01:34:20.644
"dyscoglia."
2748
01:34:20.646 --> 01:34:22.144
Dyscalculia.
2749
01:34:22.146 --> 01:34:23.647
However you say it.
2750
01:34:23.649 --> 01:34:26.116
The issue is you're dishonest.
2751
01:34:26.118 --> 01:34:28.084
I don't blame that girl
for dumping you.
2752
01:34:28.086 --> 01:34:31.089
- Now, Gerald, that is enough.
- Uh-huh.
2753
01:34:32.324 --> 01:34:34.256
You know, maybe you're right.
2754
01:34:34.258 --> 01:34:36.292
Maybe I do deserve it.
2755
01:34:36.294 --> 01:34:37.461
You think?
2756
01:34:37.463 --> 01:34:40.063
I was being sarcastic.
2757
01:34:40.065 --> 01:34:42.399
I'll get your bed ready, baby.
2758
01:34:42.401 --> 01:34:44.201
Would you like a tuck-in?
2759
01:34:44.203 --> 01:34:45.404
Yes, please.
2760
01:34:46.605 --> 01:34:47.771
Thank you, Mom.
2761
01:34:47.773 --> 01:34:49.408
Anything for you, darling.
2762
01:34:55.180 --> 01:34:56.548
I failed.
2763
01:34:58.717 --> 01:35:00.986
I failed as a father.
2764
01:35:02.087 --> 01:35:03.655
A tuck-in?
2765
01:35:04.790 --> 01:35:06.323
(INDISTINCT WHISPERING)
2766
01:35:06.325 --> 01:35:08.558
Oh, my gosh, why'd he come
on the bus like that?
2767
01:35:08.560 --> 01:35:10.562
- I don't know.
- He ain't got no friends.
2768
01:35:14.600 --> 01:35:16.166
What's the problem?
2769
01:35:16.168 --> 01:35:18.100
♪
2770
01:35:18.102 --> 01:35:19.603
TEDDY:
Christian Chicken!
2771
01:35:19.605 --> 01:35:21.505
- (HORN HONKING)
- ♪ Call me Mr. Pitiful...
2772
01:35:21.507 --> 01:35:23.506
Honk once if you love chicken.
2773
01:35:23.508 --> 01:35:26.276
Honk twice
if you love the Lord.
2774
01:35:26.278 --> 01:35:28.111
Come and get your chicken
if you...
2775
01:35:28.113 --> 01:35:29.646
ready to start winning.
2776
01:35:29.648 --> 01:35:31.113
Hey.
2777
01:35:31.115 --> 01:35:32.281
Sellout!
2778
01:35:32.283 --> 01:35:33.315
What?
2779
01:35:33.317 --> 01:35:34.784
You a sellout, man.
2780
01:35:34.786 --> 01:35:36.218
Brother, I'm just trying
to make an honest living.
2781
01:35:36.220 --> 01:35:37.420
Why don't you get off my back?
2782
01:35:37.422 --> 01:35:39.422
Go get a job
at the post office, then.
2783
01:35:39.424 --> 01:35:41.190
- Get your ass up out of here.
- What? Say it again!
2784
01:35:41.192 --> 01:35:42.325
- (DOOR OPENS)
- Come on, man!
2785
01:35:42.327 --> 01:35:43.392
- Go ahead with that.
- (DOOR CLOSES)
2786
01:35:43.394 --> 01:35:44.628
Stay woke, brah.
2787
01:35:44.630 --> 01:35:47.698
Yeah, well, I see you ate the
chicken, you son of a bitch.
2788
01:35:50.235 --> 01:35:52.204
So, this is what
it's come to, huh?
2789
01:35:55.206 --> 01:35:57.206
You got some nerve, man.
2790
01:35:57.208 --> 01:35:58.543
Teddy, look.
2791
01:36:00.177 --> 01:36:02.812
I came here to apologize.
2792
01:36:02.814 --> 01:36:05.114
I'm on my break.
2793
01:36:05.116 --> 01:36:07.182
- I ain't got time for this.
- Teddy, please, just listen.
2794
01:36:07.184 --> 01:36:08.651
I don't want to hear nothing
you got to say, man.
2795
01:36:08.653 --> 01:36:09.485
No, please just listen to me.
2796
01:36:09.487 --> 01:36:10.619
I don't have nothing
to say to you.
2797
01:36:10.621 --> 01:36:12.655
I just... well, I have
something to say to you, okay?
2798
01:36:12.657 --> 01:36:13.757
- What? What?
- Give me 30 seconds, okay?
2799
01:36:13.759 --> 01:36:15.292
30 seconds. Go.
2800
01:36:15.294 --> 01:36:17.359
Listen, when-when we
were in high school,
2801
01:36:17.361 --> 01:36:18.795
you had everything
that I wanted.
2802
01:36:18.797 --> 01:36:20.496
You got 28 seconds left.
2803
01:36:20.498 --> 01:36:21.898
I had grades.
That's all I had.
2804
01:36:21.900 --> 01:36:25.201
You-you had sports,
friends, girls.
2805
01:36:25.203 --> 01:36:26.836
- I sucked at all that.
- 20.
2806
01:36:26.838 --> 01:36:28.772
I was 27 when I got
my first hand job.
2807
01:36:28.774 --> 01:36:31.640
You're at one, but before I...
before I walk away,
2808
01:36:31.642 --> 01:36:33.208
I want to tell you that's sad.
2809
01:36:33.210 --> 01:36:34.343
- That's my point.
- I don't care.
2810
01:36:34.345 --> 01:36:35.444
- Why are you telling me?
- My point is...
2811
01:36:35.446 --> 01:36:37.814
I was a late bloomer,
and I was desperate and sad,
2812
01:36:37.816 --> 01:36:39.281
and I blamed you.
2813
01:36:39.283 --> 01:36:41.517
And the other night,
2814
01:36:41.519 --> 01:36:44.653
when I got my revenge,
it felt awful.
2815
01:36:44.655 --> 01:36:46.755
I got into education
to make a difference
2816
01:36:46.757 --> 01:36:49.326
in people's lives,
not to ruin them.
2817
01:36:49.328 --> 01:36:50.860
- (CAR DOOR OPENS)
- CARRIE: Also,
2818
01:36:50.862 --> 01:36:53.562
I told Stewart here
I'd beat his ass
2819
01:36:53.564 --> 01:36:55.464
if he didn't come
and apologize.
2820
01:36:55.466 --> 01:36:56.865
That is true.
That was a part...
2821
01:36:56.867 --> 01:36:58.400
part of it, a small part.
2822
01:36:58.402 --> 01:36:59.902
Okay, you know what, guys?
2823
01:36:59.904 --> 01:37:03.640
I appreciate the whole
after-school special moment.
2824
01:37:03.642 --> 01:37:05.809
But understand that I am okay.
2825
01:37:05.811 --> 01:37:07.743
I am where I'm supposed to be.
2826
01:37:07.745 --> 01:37:09.378
- All right?
- Your destiny is to work
2827
01:37:09.380 --> 01:37:11.447
at a fast food joint
next to a strip club?
2828
01:37:11.449 --> 01:37:13.883
Yes. All right,
if I stand in the right spot
2829
01:37:13.885 --> 01:37:16.285
in this parking lot,
I can smell cocoa butter
2830
01:37:16.287 --> 01:37:18.253
and fried chicken
at the same time.
2831
01:37:18.255 --> 01:37:20.789
And I don't know about you
guys, but that's a win for me.
2832
01:37:20.791 --> 01:37:23.325
- Teddy, l-listen to me. Ted...
- Ain't no "Teddy, listen."
2833
01:37:23.327 --> 01:37:24.727
You know I wasn't
gonna pass that test,
2834
01:37:24.729 --> 01:37:26.261
so don't sit here and act like
2835
01:37:26.263 --> 01:37:27.897
it wasn't gonna be
a different story.
2836
01:37:27.899 --> 01:37:29.331
And don't act like
you don't want
2837
01:37:29.333 --> 01:37:30.799
to be able to finally say
that I'm dumb.
2838
01:37:30.801 --> 01:37:31.667
No, you're not.
2839
01:37:31.669 --> 01:37:33.902
You can finally say it, Stew.
Say it.
2840
01:37:33.904 --> 01:37:35.971
Teddy...
2841
01:37:35.973 --> 01:37:38.507
you are a lot of things.
2842
01:37:38.509 --> 01:37:39.876
A hustler.
2843
01:37:39.878 --> 01:37:41.310
A liar.
2844
01:37:41.312 --> 01:37:42.845
You're very short.
2845
01:37:42.847 --> 01:37:45.314
- Mad loud, too.
- Mmm.
2846
01:37:45.316 --> 01:37:47.616
But you are not dumb.
2847
01:37:47.618 --> 01:37:50.987
Now, this suit you got on
is dumb as hell.
2848
01:37:50.989 --> 01:37:52.721
- I rebuke you.
- You...?
2849
01:37:52.723 --> 01:37:54.456
Rebuke. I rebuke you!
2850
01:37:54.458 --> 01:37:55.924
- Boy... give me this thing.
- I'm going to work.
2851
01:37:55.926 --> 01:37:57.626
Now, let me go back to...
What you doing?
2852
01:37:57.628 --> 01:37:58.861
- What you doing, man?
- Take this suit off,
2853
01:37:58.863 --> 01:38:00.930
- and you gonna take this test.
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
2854
01:38:00.932 --> 01:38:02.564
- No, let's use our words.
- You gonna take this test.
2855
01:38:02.566 --> 01:38:03.699
- All right, come here.
- You know what?
2856
01:38:03.701 --> 01:38:04.867
- What you doing?
- She has a belt.
2857
01:38:04.869 --> 01:38:05.734
- She's got a belt!
- (TEDDY SCREAMS)
2858
01:38:05.736 --> 01:38:07.469
- You gonna take this suit off.
- Hey!
2859
01:38:07.471 --> 01:38:08.871
- Uh, guys, guys, guys, guys...
- (CLAMORING)
2860
01:38:08.873 --> 01:38:10.773
- You stop! You stay there!
- Get off me!
2861
01:38:10.775 --> 01:38:12.507
It's gonna hurt me more
than it's gonna hurt you.
2862
01:38:12.509 --> 01:38:14.643
Oh, God, I can't be
a part of this.
2863
01:38:14.645 --> 01:38:17.312
Gonna tear your ass up!
2864
01:38:17.314 --> 01:38:18.747
Okay, this seems like
a black thing,
2865
01:38:18.749 --> 01:38:20.816
so I-I'm just gonna
order us some food.
2866
01:38:20.818 --> 01:38:22.517
- All right! All right!
- Now, listen to me.
2867
01:38:22.519 --> 01:38:23.752
- You listening to me?
- Yes.
2868
01:38:23.754 --> 01:38:25.587
Now, you have worked
too hard to be
2869
01:38:25.589 --> 01:38:28.424
running around here
in a damn holy chicken suit.
2870
01:38:28.426 --> 01:38:30.359
- Okay?
- Yes.
2871
01:38:30.361 --> 01:38:32.393
Now, either you get in the car
2872
01:38:32.395 --> 01:38:34.763
and you take that test,
2873
01:38:34.765 --> 01:38:37.934
or I continue
to tenderize your ass!
2874
01:38:37.936 --> 01:38:39.437
Your choice.
2875
01:38:43.007 --> 01:38:45.475
- Are you ready?
- Good luck, guys.
2876
01:38:46.609 --> 01:38:48.342
- Yeah.
- I'm back.
2877
01:38:48.344 --> 01:38:49.914
Hey, Carrie.
2878
01:38:53.283 --> 01:38:54.418
(SIGHS)
2879
01:38:57.988 --> 01:38:59.888
- MACKENZIE: Teddy!
- MILA: Aw, Teddy's back.
2880
01:38:59.890 --> 01:39:01.657
Good to see you, bro.
What's up, Ted?
2881
01:39:01.659 --> 01:39:04.326
- MILA: Hey, Teddy.
- MACKENZIE: Teddy! Teddy!
2882
01:39:04.328 --> 01:39:05.326
Yes!
2883
01:39:05.328 --> 01:39:06.461
(CHUCKLING)
2884
01:39:06.463 --> 01:39:07.528
JAYLEN:
What up, king?
2885
01:39:07.530 --> 01:39:08.764
Come on, man.
2886
01:39:08.766 --> 01:39:10.698
Let's do this.
2887
01:39:10.700 --> 01:39:11.935
LUIS:
Our hero returns.
2888
01:39:13.437 --> 01:39:14.937
(SIGHS)
2889
01:39:14.939 --> 01:39:17.506
CARRIE:
Okay. We're complete.
2890
01:39:17.508 --> 01:39:19.742
So let's turn on
those computers
2891
01:39:19.744 --> 01:39:21.476
and ace this thing.
2892
01:39:21.478 --> 01:39:22.577
Go.
2893
01:39:22.579 --> 01:39:23.978
(SIGHS)
2894
01:39:23.980 --> 01:39:26.081
Okay, robot.
2895
01:39:26.083 --> 01:39:28.719
You bowing down to a god today.
2896
01:39:33.656 --> 01:39:35.389
Good luck, everybody.
2897
01:39:35.391 --> 01:39:38.594
♪
2898
01:39:38.596 --> 01:39:40.396
(GRUNTING QUIETLY)
2899
01:39:42.665 --> 01:39:43.968
(GRUNTS)
2900
01:39:47.104 --> 01:39:48.771
Ah.
2901
01:39:48.773 --> 01:39:49.807
(GROANS)
2902
01:39:51.976 --> 01:39:53.778
(SIGHS)
2903
01:39:54.912 --> 01:39:56.579
Come on, Teddy.
2904
01:40:02.553 --> 01:40:03.786
CARRIE:
<i>Focus.</i>
2905
01:40:03.788 --> 01:40:04.887
<i>Concentrate.</i>
2906
01:40:04.889 --> 01:40:06.521
<i>Get rid of that mind chatter.</i>
2907
01:40:06.523 --> 01:40:07.990
(GRUNTS)
2908
01:40:07.992 --> 01:40:09.457
- Come on. Focus.
- (YELLS)
2909
01:40:09.459 --> 01:40:11.492
- Focus!
- Oh, God!
2910
01:40:11.494 --> 01:40:13.028
(ECHOING): Focus.
You better get it right.
2911
01:40:13.030 --> 01:40:15.365
- (SCREAMING)
- Focus, focus, focus!
2912
01:40:16.901 --> 01:40:18.835
♪
2913
01:40:22.972 --> 01:40:24.909
♪
2914
01:40:42.959 --> 01:40:43.893
Yeah!
2915
01:40:45.929 --> 01:40:46.863
Shh.
2916
01:40:50.034 --> 01:40:52.834
Okay, everybody calm down,
all right?
2917
01:40:52.836 --> 01:40:54.902
The results will be in online
in just a minute.
2918
01:40:54.904 --> 01:40:59.106
- If you get over 145, you pass.
- TEDDY: She's right.
2919
01:40:59.108 --> 01:41:00.976
All right, you do the hard
work, you get rewarded for it.
2920
01:41:00.978 --> 01:41:02.476
- No need to panic.
- (ELECTRONIC CHIMING)
2921
01:41:02.478 --> 01:41:03.946
Hey, hey, hey.
The results just came in.
2922
01:41:03.948 --> 01:41:06.714
- Oh, shit.
- MACKENZIE: Oh, my gosh. Uh...
2923
01:41:06.716 --> 01:41:08.950
I passed. I got a 146!
2924
01:41:08.952 --> 01:41:11.185
- (WHOOPING, CHEERING)
- 146! Nice! Yeah!
2925
01:41:11.187 --> 01:41:12.754
- Way to go.
- MACKENZIE: Yes!
2926
01:41:12.756 --> 01:41:14.022
Management, here I come, baby!
2927
01:41:14.024 --> 01:41:15.190
- He deserved that.
- (CHIMING)
2928
01:41:15.192 --> 01:41:17.859
- 168.
- Oh!
2929
01:41:17.861 --> 01:41:19.660
- JAYLEN: Swim big!
- (WHOOPS)
2930
01:41:19.662 --> 01:41:21.596
I don't have to do
housework anymore.
2931
01:41:21.598 --> 01:41:23.430
- BOBBY: I passed!
- Yay! Bobby passed.
2932
01:41:23.432 --> 01:41:24.766
- Bobby passed, y'all.
- Yes, Bobby.
2933
01:41:24.768 --> 01:41:26.567
165, B!
2934
01:41:26.569 --> 01:41:27.935
- Way to go, man.
- (MILA WHOOPS)
2935
01:41:27.937 --> 01:41:30.104
- I'm going to college.
- CARRIE: Yeah!
2936
01:41:30.106 --> 01:41:31.706
- She ready! - Hey!
- Proud of you, kiddo.
2937
01:41:31.708 --> 01:41:32.840
Proud of you, kiddo.
2938
01:41:32.842 --> 01:41:35.542
Guys. Guys.
2939
01:41:35.544 --> 01:41:37.980
(WHIMPERING): I'm...
I'm gonna be a dental hy-enist.
2940
01:41:37.982 --> 01:41:39.780
"Hygienist."
He's saying "hygienist."
2941
01:41:39.782 --> 01:41:41.182
I'm gonna be
a dental hy-enist.
2942
01:41:41.184 --> 01:41:42.817
- Yes. It's good for you, man.
- (CHIMING)
2943
01:41:42.819 --> 01:41:43.918
JAYLEN:
Y'all ready for this?
2944
01:41:43.920 --> 01:41:45.953
- What?
- Jay got a 146!
2945
01:41:45.955 --> 01:41:47.989
Jay got a damn 146!
2946
01:41:47.991 --> 01:41:50.092
- Same as you, fam! Yeah!
- Yeah!
2947
01:41:50.094 --> 01:41:51.726
- Yeah! We won this!
- Proud of you guys.
2948
01:41:51.728 --> 01:41:53.094
- You said it.
- JAYLEN: What you got?
2949
01:41:53.096 --> 01:41:54.495
What you got? Come on, Teddy.
2950
01:41:54.497 --> 01:41:56.130
MACKENZIE:
Come on, Teddy.
2951
01:41:56.132 --> 01:41:58.032
I can't. I can't check it.
2952
01:41:58.034 --> 01:42:00.067
Here, Carrie, here,
you check mine for me.
2953
01:42:00.069 --> 01:42:01.702
(SIGHING):
Oh, God.
2954
01:42:01.704 --> 01:42:02.937
I'm too nervous, man.
2955
01:42:02.939 --> 01:42:04.505
MACKENZIE:
Come on.
2956
01:42:04.507 --> 01:42:06.107
JAYLEN:
Genius level.
2957
01:42:06.109 --> 01:42:07.942
MACKENZIE:
That's right.
2958
01:42:07.944 --> 01:42:09.509
Whew!
2959
01:42:09.511 --> 01:42:11.012
Teddy, I'm sorry.
2960
01:42:11.014 --> 01:42:12.680
Come on, Carrie.
Don't play right now.
2961
01:42:12.682 --> 01:42:14.048
Just... just tell me the score.
2962
01:42:14.050 --> 01:42:15.516
Tell me what I got.
2963
01:42:15.518 --> 01:42:16.586
I'm not joking with you this...
2964
01:42:17.887 --> 01:42:19.122
You didn't pass.
2965
01:42:30.166 --> 01:42:32.768
I got a 117.
2966
01:42:34.170 --> 01:42:36.069
I'm sorry, Teddy.
2967
01:42:36.071 --> 01:42:37.772
It doesn't matter.
You know why?
2968
01:42:37.774 --> 01:42:40.608
Because this is a...
this is a minor setback
2969
01:42:40.610 --> 01:42:42.143
for a major comeback.
2970
01:42:42.145 --> 01:42:44.245
- Yes.
- I'm-a take the test again, guys.
2971
01:42:44.247 --> 01:42:46.713
- That's right. Yes.
- You should!
2972
01:42:46.715 --> 01:42:48.249
- I'm-a take the test again.
- You take it again!
2973
01:42:48.251 --> 01:42:49.216
You're taking it again.
That's right.
2974
01:42:49.218 --> 01:42:50.251
(HIGH-PITCHED):
I said I'm-a take it again!
2975
01:42:50.253 --> 01:42:53.187
Oh, God, he's doing
that thing with his voice.
2976
01:42:53.189 --> 01:42:54.855
Yeah, I know.
I heard it, too.
2977
01:42:54.857 --> 01:42:56.589
(HIGH-PITCHED):
I'm-a take the test again!
2978
01:42:56.591 --> 01:42:57.757
♪ Hey, hey
2979
01:42:57.759 --> 01:42:59.293
♪ Some people sometimes
2980
01:42:59.295 --> 01:43:02.198
♪ They think they need
to call it a day... ♪
2981
01:43:05.168 --> 01:43:06.599
Is everybody getting
the same number?
2982
01:43:06.601 --> 01:43:07.600
- Hey, Marv.
- Yeah?
2983
01:43:07.602 --> 01:43:08.601
I failed.
2984
01:43:08.603 --> 01:43:09.970
You failed the test?
2985
01:43:09.972 --> 01:43:11.238
But I'm-a take it again.
2986
01:43:11.240 --> 01:43:12.940
That's why you stopped by?
2987
01:43:12.942 --> 01:43:15.009
♪ Ain't never been
caught up... ♪
2988
01:43:15.011 --> 01:43:16.243
I failed again.
2989
01:43:16.245 --> 01:43:18.845
Yep, but I'm-a take it
again now.
2990
01:43:18.847 --> 01:43:20.281
I'm-a take it again.
2991
01:43:20.283 --> 01:43:23.616
♪ I'm saying
I see my future... ♪
2992
01:43:23.618 --> 01:43:25.653
- (DOOR OPENS)
- TEDDY: Hey, y'all.
2993
01:43:25.655 --> 01:43:27.620
I definitely didn't pass
that one.
2994
01:43:27.622 --> 01:43:28.755
I mean, there was
a whole section
2995
01:43:28.757 --> 01:43:29.823
that I didn't even understand.
2996
01:43:29.825 --> 01:43:31.827
I'm-a take it again, though.
2997
01:43:33.996 --> 01:43:36.029
You sure he's not just dumb?
2998
01:43:36.031 --> 01:43:37.665
TEDDY:
<i>Well, the new test results</i>
2999
01:43:37.667 --> 01:43:39.000
just came in.
3000
01:43:39.002 --> 01:43:40.334
I failed.
3001
01:43:40.336 --> 01:43:42.069
Wait a minute.
3002
01:43:42.071 --> 01:43:43.737
Wait, I passed.
3003
01:43:43.739 --> 01:43:45.038
You what?
3004
01:43:45.040 --> 01:43:47.007
A 178.
That's, like, college, right?
3005
01:43:47.009 --> 01:43:48.174
- I passed.
- (GASPS)
3006
01:43:48.176 --> 01:43:49.310
- (CHEERING)
- You passed?
3007
01:43:49.312 --> 01:43:51.678
(CHEERING AND WHOOPING)
3008
01:43:51.680 --> 01:43:53.280
♪ Hey...
3009
01:43:53.282 --> 01:43:57.150
I passed! I passed!
3010
01:43:57.152 --> 01:43:58.752
You killed it, son.
3011
01:43:58.754 --> 01:44:00.821
I did it, man! I did it!
3012
01:44:00.823 --> 01:44:03.157
Hey, watch your back.
Watch your back!
3013
01:44:03.159 --> 01:44:05.159
Oh, yeah!
3014
01:44:05.161 --> 01:44:07.127
- ALL: Teddy! Teddy!
- Whoa!
3015
01:44:07.129 --> 01:44:08.895
- Teddy! Teddy!
- I passed!
3016
01:44:08.897 --> 01:44:10.230
Teddy! Teddy!
3017
01:44:10.232 --> 01:44:13.267
Thank you! Thank you!
3018
01:44:13.269 --> 01:44:15.604
(SOBBING)
3019
01:44:17.240 --> 01:44:18.740
TEDDY:
<i>I don't deserve it!</i>
3020
01:44:20.675 --> 01:44:23.676
We, the class of 2018,
represent a generation
3021
01:44:23.678 --> 01:44:25.379
of forward-thinking,
3022
01:44:25.381 --> 01:44:28.115
rule-challenging,
fearless leaders.
3023
01:44:28.117 --> 01:44:30.717
Let us go forward from this day
3024
01:44:30.719 --> 01:44:32.819
with confidence
and with courage.
3025
01:44:32.821 --> 01:44:36.189
As we cross this stage,
let us do so with the knowledge
3026
01:44:36.191 --> 01:44:41.227
that with faith in ourselves,
nothing is impossible.
3027
01:44:41.229 --> 01:44:43.063
- Thank you.
- (APPLAUSE)
3028
01:44:43.065 --> 01:44:44.966
(GASPS)
3029
01:44:48.036 --> 01:44:50.770
Beautiful and inspiring words.
3030
01:44:50.772 --> 01:44:51.938
Thank you, Mikayla.
3031
01:44:51.940 --> 01:44:53.340
Now, before we conclude,
3032
01:44:53.342 --> 01:44:55.241
I'm sure some of you
are wondering
3033
01:44:55.243 --> 01:44:59.312
why we have adult students
with us onstage.
3034
01:44:59.314 --> 01:45:01.148
Well, as you all know,
3035
01:45:01.150 --> 01:45:03.083
I am an innovator.
3036
01:45:03.085 --> 01:45:05.018
A maverick.
3037
01:45:05.020 --> 01:45:07.320
I don't play by the...
3038
01:45:07.322 --> 01:45:08.721
(CLEARS THROAT)
3039
01:45:08.723 --> 01:45:10.689
- (CHUCKLES)
- So I have decided,
3040
01:45:10.691 --> 01:45:12.926
for the first time
in Piedmont history,
3041
01:45:12.928 --> 01:45:14.328
to invite our
night school graduates
3042
01:45:14.330 --> 01:45:15.795
to join our seniors.
3043
01:45:15.797 --> 01:45:17.430
They have elected
one of their own
3044
01:45:17.432 --> 01:45:19.165
to speak on their behalf.
3045
01:45:19.167 --> 01:45:21.868
It is with great pride
3046
01:45:21.870 --> 01:45:24.104
that I introduce
Mr. Teddy Walker.
3047
01:45:24.106 --> 01:45:25.272
(APPLAUSE)
3048
01:45:25.274 --> 01:45:26.673
- Hey, all right.
- (WHOOPING)
3049
01:45:26.675 --> 01:45:28.041
- Yeah!
- You got this, Teddy.
3050
01:45:28.043 --> 01:45:30.043
- You got this.
- Teddy! Teddy!
3051
01:45:30.045 --> 01:45:31.411
Teddy! Teddy!
3052
01:45:31.413 --> 01:45:34.680
Teddy! Teddy! Teddy!
3053
01:45:34.682 --> 01:45:36.014
- Teddy! Teddy!
- (CHUCKLING)
3054
01:45:36.016 --> 01:45:37.085
Teddy!
3055
01:45:38.186 --> 01:45:39.819
(CLEARS THROAT)
3056
01:45:39.821 --> 01:45:42.755
Uh, let me just start off
by telling you guys
3057
01:45:42.757 --> 01:45:44.126
a little something about me.
3058
01:45:45.460 --> 01:45:48.261
I'm Teddy Walker, and...
3059
01:45:48.263 --> 01:45:50.029
I'm a liar.
3060
01:45:50.031 --> 01:45:51.865
♪
3061
01:45:51.867 --> 01:45:55.368
For years, I've been pretending
to be somebody else.
3062
01:45:55.370 --> 01:45:57.337
Somebody that I'm not.
3063
01:45:57.339 --> 01:46:02.275
And my reason for doing that
is because I was ashamed.
3064
01:46:02.277 --> 01:46:05.713
Ashamed that I didn't learn
like my classmates.
3065
01:46:07.115 --> 01:46:10.716
Ashamed that I couldn't
take a test.
3066
01:46:10.718 --> 01:46:13.753
Ashamed that I let my family
and my friends down.
3067
01:46:13.755 --> 01:46:16.923
I mean, I put so much time
and energy into creating
3068
01:46:16.925 --> 01:46:19.325
this fake version
of Teddy Walker
3069
01:46:19.327 --> 01:46:22.728
that I forgot the value that
went into learning in school.
3070
01:46:22.730 --> 01:46:24.931
I'm talking about honesty.
3071
01:46:24.933 --> 01:46:27.167
I'm talking about
accepting who you are.
3072
01:46:27.169 --> 01:46:28.968
And it wasn't until I met
3073
01:46:28.970 --> 01:46:32.372
my amazing night school
classmates and...
3074
01:46:32.374 --> 01:46:35.443
and a teacher
that actually believed in me...
3075
01:46:37.112 --> 01:46:41.447
...that I was able
to accept who I was.
3076
01:46:41.449 --> 01:46:43.516
As a loudmouth hustler
with a boatload
3077
01:46:43.518 --> 01:46:46.320
of learning disabilities.
3078
01:46:55.029 --> 01:46:57.829
You know, for any of you
who may have struggled
3079
01:46:57.831 --> 01:47:00.098
- to get it right the first time...
- Lisa. - Hi.
3080
01:47:00.100 --> 01:47:02.402
...that I am living proof
3081
01:47:02.404 --> 01:47:06.972
that you can get it together
on a second chance.
3082
01:47:06.974 --> 01:47:08.807
I mean, I done had
a lot of chances.
3083
01:47:08.809 --> 01:47:10.209
Mm-hmm.
3084
01:47:10.211 --> 01:47:12.545
- 'Cause I messed up a lot.
- Mm-hmm.
3085
01:47:12.547 --> 01:47:15.415
But I made it
to the other side.
3086
01:47:15.417 --> 01:47:17.015
I mean, hell, we all did.
3087
01:47:17.017 --> 01:47:18.218
Ain't that right,
night school crew?
3088
01:47:18.220 --> 01:47:19.485
Hell yeah.
3089
01:47:19.487 --> 01:47:21.954
(CHEERING, WHOOPING)
3090
01:47:21.956 --> 01:47:23.889
TEDDY:
We all got second chances.
3091
01:47:23.891 --> 01:47:25.193
And to my dad.
3092
01:47:26.528 --> 01:47:28.194
He was... he was tough on me.
3093
01:47:28.196 --> 01:47:31.063
He said some things,
but he said it out of love.
3094
01:47:31.065 --> 01:47:32.532
(TEDDY SNIFFLING)
3095
01:47:32.534 --> 01:47:34.099
(CRYING): Dad, I know
you ain't never mean it
3096
01:47:34.101 --> 01:47:35.500
when you used to say
some of the things
3097
01:47:35.502 --> 01:47:37.003
that you used to say.
3098
01:47:37.005 --> 01:47:38.338
You know,
you used to say stuff like,
3099
01:47:38.340 --> 01:47:40.506
"I wish I ain't never had you."
3100
01:47:40.508 --> 01:47:43.108
Or like, uh,
3101
01:47:43.110 --> 01:47:44.843
- "That was a waste of sperm."
- CARRIE: Oh!
3102
01:47:44.845 --> 01:47:46.511
- Oh.
- "Oh, God, if I could
3103
01:47:46.513 --> 01:47:48.814
get that nut back."
I remember you said that.
3104
01:47:48.816 --> 01:47:51.117
But all that stuff
was said out of love
3105
01:47:51.119 --> 01:47:52.884
to motivate me and push me.
3106
01:47:52.886 --> 01:47:54.920
And you thought
you didn't do good,
3107
01:47:54.922 --> 01:47:56.090
but look at me now.
3108
01:47:57.458 --> 01:48:00.192
Anything is possible!
3109
01:48:00.194 --> 01:48:02.328
(APPLAUSE AND CHEERING)
3110
01:48:02.330 --> 01:48:04.231
(WHISTLING)
3111
01:48:05.966 --> 01:48:07.866
I did it!
3112
01:48:07.868 --> 01:48:09.868
- Yeah! Hurray!
- Go, Teddy!
3113
01:48:09.870 --> 01:48:10.868
Hey, Dad.
3114
01:48:10.870 --> 01:48:12.137
I did it, Dad!
3115
01:48:12.139 --> 01:48:13.606
I told you.
3116
01:48:13.608 --> 01:48:14.940
What'd I tell you?
3117
01:48:14.942 --> 01:48:17.510
(CHUCKLING):
Okay. Okay.
3118
01:48:17.512 --> 01:48:19.911
Yeah!
3119
01:48:19.913 --> 01:48:21.546
(WHOOPS)
3120
01:48:21.548 --> 01:48:24.450
Can't believe I took off work
for this shit.
3121
01:48:24.452 --> 01:48:26.286
(CHEERING)
3122
01:48:26.288 --> 01:48:28.287
(LAUGHING)
3123
01:48:28.289 --> 01:48:31.056
Thank you, guys,
for the flowers.
3124
01:48:31.058 --> 01:48:33.927
- Look what it says.
- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
3125
01:48:36.398 --> 01:48:38.196
- Hey!
- Well, I definitely need the work.
3126
01:48:38.198 --> 01:48:40.434
- I need the money, so...
- That's, uh... that's Teddy.
3127
01:48:44.204 --> 01:48:46.038
MARVIN: When's the last time
you were in love?
3128
01:48:46.040 --> 01:48:48.039
- I work. I have a job. I'm saving lives.
- Okay. Okay.
3129
01:48:48.041 --> 01:48:50.208
- Okay. You love your job.
- That's what I love to do.
3130
01:48:50.210 --> 01:48:52.377
DENISE:
Oh, there he is.
3131
01:48:52.379 --> 01:48:55.180
My little, smart,
dumb-ass brother.
3132
01:48:55.182 --> 01:48:56.315
I'm so proud of you.
3133
01:48:56.317 --> 01:48:57.582
- Oh, thank you.
- Yes.
3134
01:48:57.584 --> 01:48:59.251
- Good to see you.
- Good to see you.
3135
01:48:59.253 --> 01:49:00.486
- Thank you. - Yes.
- (MARVIN BLOWS INTO HANDS)
3136
01:49:00.488 --> 01:49:02.020
- Ah. Give me some, man.
- Ah! Congrats.
3137
01:49:02.022 --> 01:49:04.056
Thank you, man.
How do I look? Do I look smart?
3138
01:49:04.058 --> 01:49:05.490
You look unbelievable.
Let me see your smart face.
3139
01:49:05.492 --> 01:49:06.625
- Hmm.
- Hit it. One, two, three.
3140
01:49:06.627 --> 01:49:07.559
Show me the smart face.
3141
01:49:07.561 --> 01:49:08.527
- Yeah, it's still stupid.
- Show it to me.
3142
01:49:08.529 --> 01:49:10.228
- That's it. - I love it.
- Okay, that's fine.
3143
01:49:10.230 --> 01:49:11.463
- Okay. All right.
- That's all right.
3144
01:49:11.465 --> 01:49:12.567
(LIGHT LAUGHTER)
3145
01:49:14.068 --> 01:49:16.136
- (WHISPERS): Call me.
- (CLEARS THROAT)
3146
01:49:18.238 --> 01:49:20.971
Hey.
3147
01:49:20.973 --> 01:49:22.276
That was a beautiful speech,
Teddy.
3148
01:49:24.110 --> 01:49:26.347
That's the guy
I fell in love with.
3149
01:49:28.615 --> 01:49:30.584
Then allow me
to reintroduce myself.
3150
01:49:32.985 --> 01:49:34.588
I'm Teddy Walker.
3151
01:49:36.055 --> 01:49:37.590
I'm a high school dropout.
3152
01:49:37.592 --> 01:49:40.127
I work at a fast food joint.
3153
01:49:41.228 --> 01:49:42.262
I live with my mom.
3154
01:49:43.364 --> 01:49:45.129
And I take the bus.
3155
01:49:45.131 --> 01:49:47.431
But I would love...
3156
01:49:47.433 --> 01:49:49.903
I would absolutely love it...
3157
01:49:52.005 --> 01:49:54.308
...if you would let me
take you on a date.
3158
01:49:56.976 --> 01:49:59.210
Nice to meet you, Teddy Walker.
3159
01:49:59.212 --> 01:50:02.381
(CHUCKLING)
3160
01:50:02.383 --> 01:50:04.982
I'd like that.
3161
01:50:04.984 --> 01:50:07.051
You're gonna have to pay
for everything
3162
01:50:07.053 --> 01:50:09.086
because I...
I don't have any money.
3163
01:50:09.088 --> 01:50:10.454
Oh, I figured.
3164
01:50:10.456 --> 01:50:12.524
I mean, like no money.
3165
01:50:12.526 --> 01:50:13.592
I got you.
3166
01:50:13.594 --> 01:50:14.693
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
3167
01:50:14.695 --> 01:50:17.362
THERESA:
<i>Let's do a photo.</i>
3168
01:50:17.364 --> 01:50:18.730
Night school photo.
3169
01:50:18.732 --> 01:50:20.197
"GED" on three. You ready?
3170
01:50:20.199 --> 01:50:22.667
- "GED" on three.
- One, two, three.
3171
01:50:22.669 --> 01:50:25.070
- ALL: GED!
- (CAMERA CLICKS)
3172
01:50:25.072 --> 01:50:27.007
♪
3173
01:50:37.751 --> 01:50:42.587
♪ Huh! Hey ya
3174
01:50:42.589 --> 01:50:45.289
- ♪ Hey ya...
- STEWART: Hey! Hey! Hey!
3175
01:50:45.291 --> 01:50:46.690
- (MUSIC STOPS)
- Hey, hey, hey!
3176
01:50:46.692 --> 01:50:48.560
What is going on?
3177
01:50:48.562 --> 01:50:50.729
It's turn-up time, Stewart.
3178
01:50:50.731 --> 01:50:52.431
Well, this...
3179
01:50:52.433 --> 01:50:55.132
- is my house.
- Prove it.
3180
01:50:55.134 --> 01:50:57.435
- ♪ One, two, three, uh!
- (GRUNTING RHYTHMICALLY)
3181
01:50:57.437 --> 01:51:00.772
(CROWD SHOUTING EXCITEDLY)
3182
01:51:00.774 --> 01:51:03.408
♪ Shake it, shake-shake it,
shake it ♪
3183
01:51:03.410 --> 01:51:05.309
- ♪ Oh, oh
- ♪ Shake it, shake it
3184
01:51:05.311 --> 01:51:07.244
♪ Shake it, shake it,
shake it ♪
3185
01:51:07.246 --> 01:51:09.747
♪ Shake it like
a Polaroid picture ♪
3186
01:51:09.749 --> 01:51:11.415
♪ All right,
all right, all right ♪
3187
01:51:11.417 --> 01:51:13.017
♪ All right, all right,
all right, all right ♪
3188
01:51:13.019 --> 01:51:14.051
♪ All right,
all right, all right ♪
3189
01:51:14.053 --> 01:51:16.020
♪ All right, all right,
all right, all right ♪
3190
01:51:16.022 --> 01:51:17.288
♪ Oh, oh
3191
01:51:17.290 --> 01:51:19.091
- ♪ I...
- ♪ Here we go.
3192
01:51:23.062 --> 01:51:24.997
♪
3193
01:51:24.999 --> 01:51:27.699
Subtitles by explosiveskull
3194
01:51:27.701 --> 01:51:30.267
♪ Pat yourself on the back
3195
01:51:30.269 --> 01:51:32.703
- ♪ You just did that
- <i>♪ Hey ♪</i>
3196
01:51:32.705 --> 01:51:34.605
♪ Pat yourself on the back
'cause ♪
3197
01:51:34.607 --> 01:51:37.709
- <i>♪ On the back ♪</i>
- ♪ You just did that
3198
01:51:37.711 --> 01:51:40.177
♪ You just graduated
3199
01:51:40.179 --> 01:51:42.781
♪ You need a vacation
3200
01:51:42.783 --> 01:51:44.748
♪ Thanks for
all your patience ♪
3201
01:51:44.750 --> 01:51:46.383
♪ Hands up 'cause we made it
3202
01:51:46.385 --> 01:51:47.785
- <i>♪ Hands up ♪</i>
- ♪ Everyone go
3203
01:51:47.787 --> 01:51:49.253
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3204
01:51:49.255 --> 01:51:50.522
♪ Oh, oh-oh, oh
3205
01:51:50.524 --> 01:51:51.723
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3206
01:51:51.725 --> 01:51:52.824
♪ Oh, oh-oh, oh
3207
01:51:52.826 --> 01:51:54.525
♪ You just graduated
3208
01:51:54.527 --> 01:51:56.560
♪ Put your hands up
'cause you made it ♪
3209
01:51:56.562 --> 01:51:57.661
<i>♪ Hands up ♪</i>
3210
01:51:57.663 --> 01:51:59.563
♪ First in the fam, I made it
3211
01:51:59.565 --> 01:52:01.433
- <i>♪ First ♪</i>
- ♪ First in the fam graduatin' ♪
3212
01:52:01.435 --> 01:52:03.300
- <i>♪ First ♪</i>
- ♪ Put a lot of time in
3213
01:52:03.302 --> 01:52:05.102
- ♪ I almost failed it
- <i>♪ Failed it ♪</i>
3214
01:52:05.104 --> 01:52:06.770
♪ I'm talkin' bad, bad grades,
you couldn't save me ♪
3215
01:52:06.772 --> 01:52:07.638
- <i>♪ Bad, bad ♪</i>
- ♪ Middle finger
3216
01:52:07.640 --> 01:52:08.839
♪ Every teacher tried
to play me ♪
3217
01:52:08.841 --> 01:52:11.140
- <i>♪ "F" you ♪</i>
- ♪ Now I'm on their playlist
3218
01:52:11.142 --> 01:52:12.444
- ♪ Yeah, they play me
- <i>♪ Ah ♪</i>
3219
01:52:12.446 --> 01:52:14.178
♪ Mama said it wasn't crazy,
didn't faze me ♪
3220
01:52:14.180 --> 01:52:15.647
- <i>♪ At all ♪</i>
- ♪ You want a class reunion
3221
01:52:15.649 --> 01:52:17.248
- ♪ Now you gotta pay me
- <i>♪ Check ♪</i>
3222
01:52:17.250 --> 01:52:18.816
♪ I know my whole alma mater
probably hate me ♪
3223
01:52:18.818 --> 01:52:20.451
- <i>♪ So? ♪</i>
- ♪ I was the class clown
3224
01:52:20.453 --> 01:52:22.118
♪ Now I flex Grammys
3225
01:52:22.120 --> 01:52:24.321
♪ They all pregnant, shit,
I'm flyin' on a Bentley ♪
3226
01:52:24.323 --> 01:52:25.489
♪ And when you
picked 'em, bitch ♪
3227
01:52:25.491 --> 01:52:27.157
- ♪ You should've picked me
- <i>♪ That ♪</i>
3228
01:52:27.159 --> 01:52:29.527
♪ Hey, you just graduated
3229
01:52:29.529 --> 01:52:32.096
♪ You need a vacation
3230
01:52:32.098 --> 01:52:34.398
♪ Thanks for
all your patience ♪
3231
01:52:34.400 --> 01:52:36.100
♪ Hands up 'cause we made it
3232
01:52:36.102 --> 01:52:37.468
- <i>♪ One, two, hands up ♪</i>
- ♪ Everyone go
3233
01:52:37.470 --> 01:52:38.638
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3234
01:52:39.739 --> 01:52:41.171
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3235
01:52:41.173 --> 01:52:42.439
♪ Oh, oh-oh, oh
3236
01:52:42.441 --> 01:52:44.140
♪ You just graduated
3237
01:52:44.142 --> 01:52:45.709
♪ Put your hands up
'cause you made it ♪
3238
01:52:45.711 --> 01:52:47.611
- <i>♪ Hands up ♪</i>
- ♪ When I walk across the stage ♪
3239
01:52:47.613 --> 01:52:49.179
- ♪ I ain't lookin' back
- <i>♪ Lookin' back ♪</i>
3240
01:52:49.181 --> 01:52:50.347
♪ When I walk
through that door ♪
3241
01:52:50.349 --> 01:52:51.883
- ♪ I ain't comin' back
- <i>♪ Comin' back ♪</i>
3242
01:52:51.885 --> 01:52:53.851
♪ Take my cap and gown off,
then I throw my hat ♪
3243
01:52:53.853 --> 01:52:55.486
- <i>♪ Whoo! ♪</i>
- ♪ Pat my dawg on the back
3244
01:52:55.488 --> 01:52:57.220
- ♪ 'Cause he did that
- <i>♪ My dawg ♪</i>
3245
01:52:57.222 --> 01:52:59.188
♪ Kiss my crush in the mouth
'cause it's 'bout time ♪
3246
01:52:59.190 --> 01:53:01.358
♪ I hope you're all about your
money, 'cause I'm 'bout mine ♪
3247
01:53:01.360 --> 01:53:02.560
- <i>♪ Check ♪</i>
- ♪ I'm-a miss homecoming
3248
01:53:02.562 --> 01:53:04.595
- ♪ Miss spring break
- <i>♪ Spring break ♪</i>
3249
01:53:04.597 --> 01:53:06.630
♪ Please don't try to be my
friend, 'cause it's too late ♪
3250
01:53:06.632 --> 01:53:08.532
♪ You think I'm-a let you
play me like a dumb-ass? ♪
3251
01:53:08.534 --> 01:53:10.400
- <i>♪ Never ♪</i>
- ♪ I learned how to count a check ♪
3252
01:53:10.402 --> 01:53:11.702
- ♪ Up in math class
- <i>♪ Clever ♪</i>
3253
01:53:11.704 --> 01:53:13.571
♪ I learned unprotected sex
ain't so bad ♪
3254
01:53:13.573 --> 01:53:15.406
- <i>♪ Mmm ♪</i>
- ♪ I had friends that passed out ♪
3255
01:53:15.408 --> 01:53:16.874
♪ Some didn't pass, thank God
3256
01:53:16.876 --> 01:53:19.175
♪ You just graduated
3257
01:53:19.177 --> 01:53:21.512
♪ You need a vacation
3258
01:53:21.514 --> 01:53:23.781
♪ Thanks for
all your patience ♪
3259
01:53:23.783 --> 01:53:25.549
♪ Hands up 'cause we made it
3260
01:53:25.551 --> 01:53:26.917
- <i>♪ Hands up, hands up ♪</i>
- ♪ Everyone go
3261
01:53:26.919 --> 01:53:28.218
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3262
01:53:28.220 --> 01:53:29.386
♪ Oh-oh,
oh, oh, oh ♪
3263
01:53:29.388 --> 01:53:30.487
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3264
01:53:30.489 --> 01:53:31.822
♪ Oh-oh,
oh, oh, oh ♪
3265
01:53:31.824 --> 01:53:33.556
♪ You just graduated
3266
01:53:33.558 --> 01:53:35.592
♪ Put your hands up
'cause you made it ♪
3267
01:53:35.594 --> 01:53:36.794
- <i>♪ Hands up ♪</i>
- ♪ Everyone go
3268
01:53:36.796 --> 01:53:37.928
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3269
01:53:37.930 --> 01:53:39.196
♪ Oh-oh,
oh, oh, oh ♪
3270
01:53:39.198 --> 01:53:40.264
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3271
01:53:40.266 --> 01:53:41.532
♪ Oh-oh,
oh, oh, oh ♪
3272
01:53:41.534 --> 01:53:43.734
♪ You just graduated
3273
01:53:43.736 --> 01:53:45.703
♪ Thank you for your patience
3274
01:53:45.705 --> 01:53:46.737
♪ Everyone go
3275
01:53:46.739 --> 01:53:47.939
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3276
01:53:47.941 --> 01:53:49.340
♪ Oh-oh,
oh, oh, oh ♪
3277
01:53:49.342 --> 01:53:50.507
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3278
01:53:50.509 --> 01:53:51.742
♪ Oh-oh,
oh, oh, oh ♪
3279
01:53:51.744 --> 01:53:53.611
♪ You just graduated
3280
01:53:53.613 --> 01:53:55.713
♪ Put your hands up
'cause you made it ♪
3281
01:53:55.715 --> 01:53:57.715
- <i>♪ Hands up ♪</i>
- ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3282
01:53:57.717 --> 01:53:58.949
♪ Oh-oh,
oh, oh, oh ♪
3283
01:53:58.951 --> 01:54:00.551
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3284
01:54:00.553 --> 01:54:01.752
♪ Oh-oh,
oh, oh, oh ♪
3285
01:54:01.754 --> 01:54:03.654
♪ You just graduated
3286
01:54:03.656 --> 01:54:05.355
♪ Thank you for your patience
3287
01:54:05.357 --> 01:54:06.389
♪ Everyone go
3288
01:54:06.391 --> 01:54:07.791
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3289
01:54:07.793 --> 01:54:09.192
♪ Oh-oh,
oh, oh, oh ♪
3290
01:54:09.194 --> 01:54:10.426
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh, oh
3291
01:54:10.428 --> 01:54:11.661
♪ Oh-oh,
oh, oh, oh ♪
3292
01:54:11.663 --> 01:54:13.364
♪ You just graduated
3293
01:54:13.366 --> 01:54:15.466
♪ Put your hands up
'cause you made it ♪
3294
01:54:15.468 --> 01:54:16.802
♪ Hands up.
3295
01:54:18.671 --> 01:54:22.472
♪ Nobody's ever,
ever gonna stop el sueño ♪
3296
01:54:22.474 --> 01:54:24.675
<i>♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪</i>
3297
01:54:24.677 --> 01:54:28.311
♪ No desert, no snake
gonna take me down ♪
3298
01:54:28.313 --> 01:54:31.314
<i>♪ Take me down, no way ♪</i>
3299
01:54:31.316 --> 01:54:35.284
♪ Nobody's ever,
ever gonna stop el sueño ♪
3300
01:54:35.286 --> 01:54:37.521
<i>♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪</i>
3301
01:54:37.523 --> 01:54:40.824
♪ I'm always gonna find
the strength to survive ♪
3302
01:54:40.826 --> 01:54:43.660
<i>♪ To survive ♪</i>
3303
01:54:43.662 --> 01:54:46.729
♪ El sueño, el sueño
3304
01:54:46.731 --> 01:54:51.669
♪ El sueño, el sueño,
el sueño ♪
3305
01:54:51.671 --> 01:54:55.838
♪ I'm living the dream
3306
01:54:55.840 --> 01:54:58.574
♪ Out here busy gettin' money
3307
01:54:58.576 --> 01:55:01.578
♪ I got two bad...
countin' for me ♪
3308
01:55:01.580 --> 01:55:03.814
♪ I want a seven-digit house
on the hill ♪
3309
01:55:03.816 --> 01:55:06.416
- ♪ I'm-a do it good!
- ♪ This is my dream
3310
01:55:06.418 --> 01:55:08.018
♪ You know I keep it trill
3311
01:55:08.020 --> 01:55:10.453
♪ They call me Young Coconut,
I'm en la playa ♪
3312
01:55:10.455 --> 01:55:12.556
- ♪ Playa!
- ♪ Don't get it twisted
3313
01:55:12.558 --> 01:55:14.992
- ♪ 'Cause I'm never gonna retire ♪
- ♪ Oh, hell no! ♪
3314
01:55:14.994 --> 01:55:17.593
♪ I Uber in these streets,
I'm wildin' with my peeps ♪
3315
01:55:17.595 --> 01:55:19.328
♪ I got a stripper on my seat
3316
01:55:19.330 --> 01:55:21.030
♪ 'Cause she know
Jay brought that beat ♪
3317
01:55:21.032 --> 01:55:22.498
♪ El sueño
3318
01:55:22.500 --> 01:55:26.036
♪ Nobody's ever,
ever gonna stop el sueño ♪
3319
01:55:26.038 --> 01:55:28.005
<i>♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪</i>
3320
01:55:28.007 --> 01:55:31.407
♪ No desert, no snake
gonna take me down ♪
3321
01:55:31.409 --> 01:55:34.343
<i>♪ Take me down, no way ♪</i>
3322
01:55:34.345 --> 01:55:38.514
♪ Nobody's ever,
ever gonna stop el sueño ♪
3323
01:55:38.516 --> 01:55:40.717
<i>♪ Ah, ah, ah ♪</i>
3324
01:55:40.719 --> 01:55:44.789
♪ I'm always gonna find
the strength to survive ♪
3325
01:55:46.591 --> 01:55:48.794
♪ ¡El sueño! ♪